Has everyone had fantasies of threesomes and group sex?

[clecouple 18]

This kind of goes along with my other post WIFE IS WET after MMF TALK, and maybe I should have made this a poll question. But, I believe (especially with this website), that everybody (man, women, husband, wife) has thought about having multiple partners at the same time?!

 

Like, I said when my wife agreed to go to a club to fulfill this fantasy she was so wet! Plus, it seemed like a "load of bricks was taken off her shoulders":bricks: Because, after that she was more relaxed and horny at the same time! I think a lot of couples have this fantasy, but the husband or wife is afraid to offend their partner. I said to my wife that "their was nothing to be embarrassed about it, because I knew you had the 3some fantasy and you finally told me."

 

My wife is researching clubs and this website and has left a post. So, after talking and agreeing to this fantasy, we have become more open if that was possible. Because, we are a very open couple in discussing sexual things anyways:claps: , but we don't always act upon them.

 

Lately, when making love we have been acting out what could possibly happen at a club. I have said things to her like, "Want to lick my wife's p*ssy!", or "You want to suck 2 c*cks!" Then, I will get out a dildo and put it in her as she is licking me, just to

pretend. We actually want to do soft swinging 3 or 4some with another couple. I think by "role playing" we will be more prepared to actually go through it?!

 

Any Oponions?

[TNT 1,155]

Sharing sexual fantasies is one of the first steps for entering swinging.

 

It sounds as if you are definitely on the right road. Always remember to keep it slow, never push, and most importantly ENJOY the new found closeness you have with each other as well as every step you take together making your fantasies into reality.

 

Teresa

[Elusive BiFem 70]

Uhhhh....I would have to disagree with you, clecouple, that "everybody (man, women, husband, wife) has thought about having multiple partners at the same time?!"

 

I had never thought of it a single time - ever - until my first "accidental" experience well into adulthood...what? around 32-33 or so? And even then, it was a single experience with friends, and for many, many years afterwards, I thought I/we were weird or something. I literally had no idea that swinging "existed," that there was a name for it...anything. Zero, zip, zilch. It was many, many years later that that I came to know that it was an activity shared by a certain segment of the population. Maybe I was exceptionally naive or something. Sometimes I am. (or dense?)

 

Now that isn't to say that I'm sorry I "discovered" it!

 

- EBF

 

Edit: I also wanted to say it wasn't until about 3 years ago that I found out about clubs...about the same time I found out about the existence of the lifestyle. Again, zero, zip, zilch...no idea such places existed. In fact, I had heard of a couple of the clubs around here and still didn't know they were lifestyle clubs. Had anyone invited me to go, I would have innocently said, "yeah, sure"....thinking they were like any other nightclub. Now! Would I have been surprised!!!

 

One more Edit: I've come a long way, Baby!!!

[clecouple 18]

It's okay to disagree. My thoughts on this subject of group fantasies is that the majority of people have thought about it. I liken it to the question (especially when you're aksed in high-school), if you masturbate. I remember many guys around school saying that, "I don't play with myself, I've got a girlfiend." It's the same way for the girls/women in our society. IF so many people admitted they were not MASTURBATING, how come all the surveys we see say that 90+% of men, and 70+% women masturbate. I think it's privacy of a survey that lets people respond yes, rather than talking to a friend or a co-workrt about the subject.

 

I just want to see how many people respond yes to this post. Thanks for your opinion! But, I now see you are into the lifestyle kind of by accident?! But not regretting it! Right?

[fun_pairTX 26]

We have done the MFM and FMF thing with happy results. We also do the moresome 8+ thing once a month or so (all the same group all the time). Moresomes have been very good to us, we have a great time.

[ready2pla 17]

My wife and I were married at 17 and 18 and about a year after we got married we started talking during sex you know a little dirty talk. And that is kind of when we found we were really turned on by the thought of watching each other with another person. since that time I have always had a fantasy of having a threesome. both mfm and ffm but as we got to playing in the lifestyle our main interest goes to the mfm. There is nothing more sexually intence as a woman getting it from all ends. I see so much pleasure in her face and body that I couldn't imagine not allowing her to experience it anymore. My wife is straight and the ffm thing is a wonderful fantasy for me but I want to see two women totally enjoying each other as I get to fuck one then the other. but alass she is straight so we are really into the mmf threesomes which is fine with me. I get my pleasure making her very happy. I think if you are a swinger and you haven't tried giving your wife a mmf thresome or even a ffm threesome you are missing out. Maybe you need to bring it up she may be affraid to offend you. At least you will be giving her a chance to experience all you can while you can.

[DragonsLair 26]

My husband and I have had the fantasy of MFM and FFM. We haven't acted on them, mainly because I'm not ready yet. But the ideas definitely turn us on. And sometime in the future, we'll make them come true.

 

Keep up the conversation and discussions. That's the best benefit from this lifestyle.

 

Let us know when you make your fantasies come true.

[OhioCouple 40]

Originally posted by clecouple

But, I believe (especially with this website), that everybody (man, women, husband, wife) has thought about having multiple partners at the same time?

Color me in with multiple crayons for not even giving it the first thought until I was nearing 40 years of age. I'm thinking I was 38 or so??? I had no clue about swingers, clubs or sites like this. And I thought I was pretty worldly.

 

Now I had seen porn and stuff before, but to me that was nasty, disgusting behavior with all those piles of people in a mess on the floor. Porn however is a whole lot different than the real thing! Woo Hoo! But I'll bet ya that if the general population knew what we do for fun, they would probably find us nasty and disgusting. Oh well, they don't know what they are missing!

[Buck 17]

Well, Cleo, I don't know if everyone has had fantasies of having multiple partners but I'll bet a majority have. I think most men I know will admit that having two females at one time is a major fantasy, especially if they have not experienced it. As for me, being somewhat older and married for over twenty years, all my fantasies involve my wife, usually in a MFM situation. Why, I don't know, but from this board I have found that it is certainly not an unsual fantasy. I must say that a FFM fantasy with my wife is certainly OK with me, but she maintains the thought is NOT a turn on to her. She has slowly began admitting that a MMF fantasy is somewhat exciting to her, but she says it is because she knows it turns me on so much. I stongly suspect with the right person, in the right situation, she may be in favor of it but that scenerio may never happen. As for now, I'll just be content with the fantasy of it and not push her. If it happens, it happens. If not, so be it.

[ready2pla 17]

I think you are so right Ohio Couple I work with guy's that are alway's looking and making comments about how they would love to fuck this gal or that one walking down the street. And they think that would be fine but if you ask them if they would let there wifes fuck some other guy at the same time they would mostly say no way. So whats good for them is not good for there wifes. So when I here them carry on I just sit back and smile thinking of the great marriage and wild times we have together. And without worry that she or he will be out cheating on each other. I think this message board and the people that make it are fantastic.

[Sibella 15]

I am turning 40 in 2 weeks; been married nearly 18 years and have just started experiencing anything like this! The first encounter, MFM, was by accident, I think. My husband and one of his best friends. It blew my mind, I never thought I could do anything like that. We all blamed it on the alchohol. That was 6 months ago. I had really tried to put it out of my mind, but it was great! Then, the other day, my husband and his friend showed up unexpectantly and wanted another encounter. I went along with it, and enjoyed it a lot. My husband really liked watching me with another guy.

Part of me is torn, however, because he is a friend. I consider him my friend also, and I have reassured my husband that I have no deeper feelings for this man other than friendship. Sp how am I getting naked with him? This is so opposite of the way I was raised!

Just thought I'd jump in here and see if anyone has any words of wisdom. Thanks!

[hmr 25]

Originally posted by OhioCouple

Color me in with multiple crayons for not even giving it the first thought until I was nearing 40 years of age. I'm thinking I was 38 or so??? I had no clue about swingers, clubs or sites like this. And I thought I was pretty worldly.

 

I've got to agree! When I hit 40 it was like someone flipped a switch. I became an entirely different person.facelick My middle name should have been 'Naive'. I knew nothing about swingers, or clubs, or sites like this either. Mr hmr told me about them after I told him of a dream I had, (What was you introduction...). I wasn't completely innocent, but I led a very protected life! Can ya'll relate to Daddy's little girl? The one who would never do anything she was't suppose to do? That was me. Never defied my parents, never had to. Until I moved in with mr hmr. He corrupted me! And boy am I glad he did!

 

I also have to admit that was my first fantasy, and swinging experience. From what I have observed on SLS there are numerous 3-somes and more-somes fantasies! We also enjoy the more-somes about once a month with our regular group. It is a wonderfully,erotic experience!facelick

 

mrs hmr:)

[Sibella 15]

Yeah, what is up with turning 40? I like your term, flipping a switch. That is exactly how I feel! I too was the perfect daughter, honor student, ect.

I have to say, I was so uninformed. I never even realized I wasn't having "fireworks" orgasms until 3 years ago! I never knew there were different kinds! The ones I had before were okay, but I kept thinking, "what is everyone so hyped up about?". I could take it or leave it. Until one day I got the nerve up to masterbate. Oh my God! I thought I was having a seizure! It scared me to death! But then I finally understood what it was all about. And how exactly do you go about telling your husband of 15 years that you'd never had a clitoral orgasm before??? Basically, I didn't. I just starting masterbating during sex, mostly with toys. He loved that! The more open we became with each other sexually, the more we began to talk. We discussed threesomes, but always just in theory. The two encounters we have had so far have not really been planned, at least by me. I kinda like not knowing when or where it will happen. Of course, I trust my husband, and he alone decides when these encounters will happen. I believe that keeps him in control and he has no fear or jealousy that way. He knows it is he who is bringing it about. But I have to say, I have to bite my toungue sometimes, because I'd like it more often.

[hmr 25]

Originally posted by Sibella

. Oh my God! I thought I was having a seizure! It scared me to death!

 

Sibella, you think it scared you....I'm an epileptic! ... until I met my husband I had only had one orgasm. I didn't know what was going on. Talk about uninformed, I asked my older sister if what I was feeling was normal! I didn't know...When I met my husband, I was 26years old, I had never seen a porn movie, or a vibrator. When he brought the vibrator out the first time, I asked him what it was and what he was going to do with it!

 

After 3 children, I could have cared less about sex. I was working and taking care of 3babies. Who felt like screwing. Then all of a sudden, BAMM!! I was taken over by aliens! Thank God! My orgasms have become inccredible, my sex drive insatiable (almost), I speak more freely and openly, I did a complete turnabout of who I was.

 

mrs hmr:)

[Sibella 15]

Mrs Hmr,

So glad to hear I'm not the only one who has gone through this. Not sure how it will come about, but I think I need to teach my daughter this stuff! I missed out on so many years of great orgasms! (I think I'm making up for all that now!) But I have to say, this journey of discovery of my own body has greatly increased the trust and intimacy between my husband and I. He has seen me "blossom", and it really turns him on.

Thanks for posting! I am LOVING this site!

Sibella

[SexhoundDog 18]

What an interesting thread, and somewhat funny too! I almost could've been the one writing Buck's post, but it sounds like he has at least had a more in depth discussion with his wife than me.

 

I think the MMF has become more of a turn on to me as I've gotten older, perhaps because I think my wife gives great head and it would be cool to watch her giving some other guy the same pleasure, perhaps while I did her doggy or some other position where I could play yet also view. Plus, she's gotten more orgasmic as well, and I'd think she might like the sensation of two guys playing with her at once. She talks like the vibrator (which of course I got one bigger than me!) and me are good enough for her threesome since I tease her about not being able to handle one, but I'm betting she has the MMF fantasy as well, or she sure seems to enjoy the two guys on one girl scenes in the porns we watch for pure viewing only.

 

But as you other women mention, she's definitely gotten to be more of a sexual, multi-orgasmic being as she's gotten older, even if we don't do it as much as we'd like. Maybe I'm just getting to be a better lover as I age too, ya think? Naaahh, that can't be it.

[Sibella 15]

I gotta say, reading these all day long has gotten me so hot!

I went home during my lunch break and masterbated twice with a vibrator; wishing my guys would've just "happened by" while I was doing it.

My hubby is gonna have his hands full tonight!

I came back to work and wrote out a fantasy I'd like to experience. I'm a writer; had a book published this year! I'm also a LIBRARIAN, so you can imagine the fantasies my husband and his friends have about the prim and proper librarian letting her hair down, so to speak, at night!

It's gonna be a great weekend!

Thanks!

[Buck 17]

Hey Sexhoundog it sounds like you and I are in almost the same situation, vibrators and all. Like all the advice given on this board, I'm not pushing my wife or rushing anything but just dropping hints when the situation warrants it, especially when we're watching porn I still haven't introduced her to the board though I'd like to in order to get her reaction to some of these threads and posts dealing with the MMF thing. How about you?

[Buck 17]

OK Sibella, I re-read your posts. Your stated that your first MMF threesome occured by accident "I THINK." Well, was it a set up by your husband or truly an accident? What is your gut feeling? What I'm driving at is that it sounds like Sexhoundog and I are are pretty much in the same situation, with wives who are increasingly sexual the older they get, but just can't seem to admit they would be open to experimenting with other sex partners. I'm pretty sure my wife would, but she just won't admit it and I don't press her too hard about it. I would prefer her to bring it up to me I guess because I don't want to push her into something she really doesn't want to do. As I've stated before, with the right third partner, in the right circumstances I think she would. I have to admit that I'm obsessed with my wife to the point that I enjoy her nudity around the house, and tease her about going topless on our boat, etc. but, she is pretty reserved about such things. I guess her "behind closed doors" sexuality is what keeps me wondeing, because she can get pretty wild at times, especially when we watch porn together. The absolute biggest fantasy I have is sharing her with a cool guy. OK Sibella, lets hear your thoughts.

[cntrycpl505 15]

I agree about getting hot. we have talked a good game for years but not taken any action. we are both wanting to real bad we live in a very small town and not any people around here in the lifestyle.still looking for the 1st time hope to enjoy it soon the idea of seeing her pleased is something I really would love to see.

[Sibella 15]

Ummm. Okay well, I'm thinking it was a set up sort-of. Meaning, I think he told his friend, come on over we'll get her drunk and see what happens. At first he only wanted to watch us. my hubby and I, have sex. To me that was not threatening. He was just going to beat off while watching us. Now it has escalated. I guess what we've done is soft-swap. I'm not sure I will ever have intercourse except with hubby. I like the fact that I don't know when it will happen. It takes the responsibilty off me.

I would never have approached my husband with this. So if you want it to happen, you might need to arrange it "sort-of", then if the circumstances are right, it will happen. They didn't have to break my arm to do it, but I was never actually asked either. They just started touching me. Of course the beer helped a lot! It sounds like I was just like your wife, Buck.

I think we women want it, but we don't want to admit it to you or to ourselves, but when it happens, look out! It is great!

Best of luck,

Sibella

[SexhoundDog 18]

But Buck, what happens if you "just happen to come across this site" and your wife reads the posts and then says "Hey Honey, let's call that Buck dude!:slam"

 

I guess it would make for a great laugh between you! As I read that little perv Sibella's post (that's a compliment by the way), the first time may have to involve some alcohol or gettin' nekkid in a hot tub with a friend who's visiting. Trouble is, I don't really have any single friends I can think of, and she's got ethics when it would come around to messin' with another woman's husband. Just wish I knew what kind of pervs for wives some of my buddies have!

[naughtygirl27 15]

My hubby & I have talked alot about MMF. Something we both wanted. He kept telling me to just pick the guy..which is easier said then done. I got some nerve up one night & said ok "this guy" who is a single friend of his. Hubby agreed 100% that it was a good pick as this guys knows about the lifestyle (not in it though) and hubby trusts him very much. Hubby talked to his friend about it & we made plans to go out for a few drinks.

 

Anyways...we get back to his place & I start to kiss him etc. He said " I cant do this" and I backed off, told him no problem, all is good. After watching some porn & chatting we started kissing and touching again (he started it). Clothes came off & oral play happened. At one point I said " I want you to F*ck me now". Well he said he just wasnt comfortable doing that & lost his erection. So hubby & I played while he watched. After we sat around & chatted. I made sure I let him know that although we didnt have sex I had an amazing time and honestly hope to do it again.

 

We are hoping with some time & more conversation we can try the MMF with him again. But if he isnt ok with it...he is still a great friend and my hubby & I MIGHT look for another male..unilt then 4somes & more somes.

 

naughtygirl27:D

[Sibella 15]

Hey naughtygirl!

That sounds like a great night! We are still not sure if we will ever have intercourse with anyone other than our spouse; just not sure we can go that far with it. Maybe in the future. For now we are just enjoying the experience as it comes. I want to do more kissing with the friend, but not sure how hubby will respond to something that personal. We are taking things very slow and discussing a lot what our boundaries are. Our marriage is number one priority, so we won't go farther than we both agree upon.

Your friend may be concerned about the friendship, as we were. So far, things are great. My husband admitted tonight that there is a pang of jealousy when he watches me with another, but it turns him on so much that that overides his jealousy. I'm not sure I'd be that way. It is new territory for us to be sure!

Have a great weekend!

Sibella

[SexhoundDog 18]

Sibella and Naughty Girl,

 

You two have a nice weekend, sounds like you might be onto a plan already, Sibella.

 

I'm betting if you two girls eat a banana in a sensuous manner I'm sure you can, you'll get a bit of excitement in your hubbies and their friends. As they say "You go, Girl!"

[curious24 17]

it's nice to see that there are people out there that want to have and do the MFM threesome. I don't hear about too many couples who actually want to experience them. It seems to me most couples just want to have the single bi-female and do the FMF thing.

 

thanks for the great thread

[Buck 17]

Judging from Sibella's and Naughtygirl's posts if it ever happens with me and my wife it will be a similar thing to theirs. A "just happen" thing. I think Sibella's comment "that we women really want it but won't admit it to you or ourselves" is exactly my situation. I have come to realize that my spouse probably will never admit it which leads me to believe that if it happens it will be a "set up" or just in the right place at the right time. I couldn't do a set up because I just don't think it's right but I think now if the opportunity ever happens that it is a possibility at the moment, I think I will not let that that opportunity pass by. At that time I would suggest it....there have been times in the past that were "ripe for it" so to speak but I didn't push or suggest and just let it pass by. I guess I won't let that happen again. Thanks for your comments Sibella and Naughtygirl, they have been helpful and reinforced what I have been thinking. Also thanks to Sexhoundog for freely discussing our similar situations.

 

I'm looking forward to spending the week-end alone with my wife so maybe I'll know more Monday than I do now. Time to push ahead a little further!

[Buck 17]

Well, Sibella I decided to go for it and cut through the hints and talk to my wife about an MMF experience. She said that she can't imagine ever doing it and it's not something she even wants to do. But, she said that my sharing that fantasy with her doesn't turn her off because it does get me turned on and that's what she likes. So I guess that's my answer. I'm fine with it too. If I can fantasize with her and not turn her off then that's a lot of progress. Since I've laid my cards on the table I will not push her any further. The seed has been planted so maybe someday it will start to grow. If it doesn't, well, I'm fine with that. I'm just thankful that we can communicate and enjoy each other within our own limits.

 

Your thoughts? EBF and Naughtygirl your thoughts would be appreciated too! Thanks in advance.

[SexhoundDog 18]

Well Buck, as many of the women on the board have said, it didn't happen right away for them either, and their husbands must've handled it right because they are swingin' now.

 

Sounds to me like you handled it right and you just never know when you may get in a situation where she might get attracted to the right guy. As you said in the post right before this one, keep alert to any sign of it. But, I've got to believe since you've had this talk with your wife, she will let you know if the time is ever right for her. For now, keep watching those threeway porns with her if she likes them too, and I guess her threeway fantasies will have to consist of yours and hers favorite vibrator and your cock.

 

Did she say she ever has fantasies about the MMF, but just keeps them at that? I haven't asked my wife that question point blank yet, but she sure seems to like those scenes in movies, so next time around I think I'll ask her. I wonder if she'd let her hair down more if you took her out of town and found a stranger or if she'd be more comfortable with someone you know. That's also an interesting thread on the board I've read in the past.

[Elusive BiFem 70]

Originally posted by Buck

Your thoughts? EBF and Naughtygirl your thoughts would be appreciated too! Thanks in advance.

 

I think it is just super that you were able to talk to her, Buck, and even more so that she didn't slam the doors in terms of fantasies. That alone will open up things for the two of you and that can only be a good thing.

 

About the only comments I would have at this point is to give her time to digest the conversation. I don't think I would let it die, nor would I push the issue just now. Slow and easy would be my mantra. Give her opportunities to bring it up to you...maybe a trip to the local porn store, allowing her to pick out the movies to be viewed. Sitting in the local mall watching people walk by and discussing with her who she might find interesting. Oh! and as silly as it may sound...when you do bring it up, do so when she is feeling great about herself. Not when she has her hands up to her elbows in dishwater, no make-up, hair a mess...

 

Also, if you haven't already done so, be certain to engage her in discussions of HER fantasies. This whole concept should be one of mutual fantasies and you want her to know her fantasies are just as important as yours.

 

And if nothing comes of it, you two will have great times together with your fantasies and that is the best of all. - EBF

[Buck 17]

Sexhoundog and EBF thanks for your quick responses. Both of your suggestions about getting her to share her fantasies is well taken; however, when I have asked her about it in the past she says she has none, or, they are thoughts of me. Can you believe that? I have always thought that everyone has fantasies and still believe that, but I think she is relunctant to share them for whatever reason. She is pretty reserved and doesn't verbalize much, but she is a real tiger in the bedroom. She will suggest certain movies to watch but they are not necessarily movies about 3-somes but just the ones with the male porn stars she likes to watch primarily. Certain stars do turn her on more than others so I know the thouht of screwing them has to be in her brain somewhere. Iknow she is not at the point to go somewhere and "pick some guy out" scenerio. I think it will almost have to be an accidental thing because I don't think she will ever admit to want to do it consciously or pre-determined if you understand what I mean. Anyway, your suggestion about getting her to share hr fantasies is well taken and I think the next step. Now that she we are communicating more openly maybe she will feel more free to share those. Looking forward to you thoughts again. Thanks!

[Sibella 15]

Hey Buck!

Thanks for asking. Well, my weekend was fantastic, I am exhausted though! Friday we went out with our friends like we had planned and had a great time at this small-town bar we go to. We all got WAY too drunk, now I remember why I don't do that very often! lol! Anyway, we were discussing the party my friends are throwing for my birthday this coming weekend. I am bringing jello shots. My friend, the female, told me they just finished painting the spare room so we can stay over if we want/need to. I'm sure she meant because of the drinking involved, but I looked at my husband and we exchanged grins.

 

We have had sex 10 times in the last seven straight days. Only once was it a threesome. I think I'm all outta juice. We decided to take a couple days off to gear up for this weekend. I have no idea what will happen at this party! P.S. our threesome friend will be there w/ his SO who is extremely closed to anything even remotely adventurous; even with him alone.

 

Regarding your wife; you are a wonderful man, to respect her enough to leave it alone for now. We have only begun talking about our fantasies in the last couple years. The trust has been built up so much from that, and it overflows to everyday marriage things also. Communication is the most important thing. We have become true friends as well as lovers and spouses.

 

I am not actively seeking another threesome anytime soon. It's fun but my focus is on my husband. He will always be number one priority. Do I think it'll happen again? Yes. In fact the three of us have Columbus day off work, so I won't be surprised if we get a visit while the kids are at school. But if that doesn't happen, I'm fine with that too. It is just one more way our marriage has expanded the last few years. I'm just relaxing with it all.

 

Have a loving and wonderful week, everyone!

[Sibella 15]

Hey Buck,

She's telling the truth! I hardly ever fantasize. For instance when masturbating with a bullet or something, I just close my eyes and lose myself in the sensations. I don't really picture anything in my mind. Most of my sex dreams are about my husband. I think he is really hot! I know guys find this hard to believe, but at least with me it is true.

 

Now lately, I have had a fantasy of our friend coming over unexpectedly. I ask him where my husband (they work together) and he tells me he'll be there soon; that he's giving us a ten minute headstart. He undresses me and we get things started. My husband just stands in the doorway, stroking himself while he watches until he can't take it anymore and joins in.

 

I haven't shared that one with my husband yet, because I don't know if he would be hurt by the fact I'd want to start out alone with our friend. This is a very tricky situation, and I don't want to hurt anyone.

 

If she is having fantasies, she will share them eventually, when she feels safe to. You seem like a loving and patient guy.

Good luck!

[saranmark 15]

I'm with you, Sibella!!

 

I don't fantasize all that often, either. When I masturbate, I simply close my eyes and concentrate on what I am feeling.

 

Now, I do occasionally have fantasies. My favorite is one of myself and another woman giving my husband oral, kissing each other and then kissing him... We haven't actually done that yet, so it is still a fantasy. It is just one of those things that I think about sometimes in the last few minutes before sleep comes to me.

 

I wonder if we are different than other women, or if most are like us???

 

Best,

SARA

[Sibella 15]

Hi Sara,

I'm not sure. My husband finds it hard to believe I don't fantasize that much. I guess because guys think about stuff like that more? I have no clue. When I do fantasize, mine are long, involved vignettes; I guess because I'm a fiction writer, so I set up a scene and everything, in my head. The encounters might be more romantic or sensual in nature rather than graphic; none the less, they do get me hot. I guess it's whatever gets you to that point.

 

Glad I'm not alone in thinking this way.

[Buck 17]

Sara and Sibella, you can't imagine how much you are helping me to finally understand my wife after 20+ years of marriage. When she has told me she doesn't fantasize I just thought she wasn't comfortable sharing them with me. Now, you two reinforce the notion that in fact she may not fantasize like I do. Also, Sibella, you mentioned that the open discussion between you and your husband had deepened the trust level between you. That has happened with us too, especially since my wife is becoming convinced that I would never force her to do anything she wouldn't want to. I think maybe that has concerned her in the past although I never, ever tried to force anything. Another interesting revelation concerning the recent communication between me and my wife is that it has been primarily through e-mail the past few days, even though we spend every night together. I think she is just more comfortable discussing these issues when we are not face to face. Isn't that weird? Maybe not, because so many people open up on this board when they probably wouldn't face to face. At any rate, among these ramblings, I hope you two understand what a help you have been to help me understand my wife better.

 

And EBF, thank you for your suggestion to "not let it die" at this point. Believe me, I won't and I think the e-mail method is a good way to keep it going. (I started to say "keep it up" but thought you may think Freud was slipping in somewhere-Ha!)

 

Also your suggestions about being super attentive to her needs is working good too. Anyway, thanks EBF. Sibella, and Sara.

[saranmark 15]

I'm with you again, Sibella. I generally think of long, detailed scenarios when I do actually fantasize. I think of the whole situation, and everything leading up to the actual sexual things.

 

And Buck, I am sure your wife is telling you the truth when she says she doesn't fantasize. I know that quite often, my husband will ask me to tell him a fantasy, and I will draw a blank... because I simply hadn't had one in quite a while. SO, more often than not, I will just make a graphic one up on the spur of the moment just to make my husband wildly turned on. Is this dishonest?? I don't think so... it's just making my husband happy.

 

 

I am glad that we could be of help to you!

Best,

Sara

[clecouple 18]

What I fantasize about (the Husband), goes back to when I was a teenager and would find my brother's Playboy. I always masturbated thinking about about how soft and beautiful their skin and bodies were. I don't why, but it goes back to childhood, but I've always admired girl's butts. So, especially masturbating to a Playboy I fantasize about rubbing up against those beautiful "tushes" and cumming all over them. I used pillows to simulate this and also to fantasize about being between some beautiful boobs!facelick facelick

 

Now, I tell my wife that she is the fantasy girl that I dreamed of all those years "reading" Playboy! WHICH IS TRUE! BECAUSE SHE IS VERY BEAUTIFUL AND HAS A SEXY TUSH and BEAUTIFUL BOOBIES THAT I CAN CUM ALL OVER!!!

 

I'll have to ask her to especially read this post and tell you about what she fantasizes about. I try and encourage her to at least read the posts on this website once a week.

 

That's her in the Avatar! Soon, we'll have the both of us there, but in the meantime I thought a nice picture of her would peak some interest!

[Buck 17]

Well Sara, Sibella, EBF and Sexhoundog it seems I've actually hit on the magic form of communication with my spouse about fantasy issues: E-mail. My spouse is pretty reserved, and while we have really great lines of communication and always have, she is really reserved about verbalizing about sexual issues. But just in the last few days it seems the e-mails I have sent her have opened up great new channels for us. I was watching TV on the bed last night and she read the e-mail I sent her yesterday afternoon and she came in and kissed me and said I'm going to let you take advantage of me! You can guess what came next. In my e-mail I took one of your suggestions and told her if she had fantasies I would be happy to hear them and she told me again that she really doesn't fantasize that much.......so ladies, you did me a BIG favor when you told me that you didn't either. I now I believe her when all along I just thought she was too shy to share them with me. You all have helped to make a great marriage even better. Thanks, Thanks, Thanks!

[BradAndJanet 70]

Hey Buck, it's great that you've hit on something that works for y'all! Happy times to you both!

[Buck 17]

I can't believe this thread is going to die. It's been one of the more interesting threads I've seen in a while. That's probably because it is about the area I'm interested in most. At any rate, thanks to all you who have posted and given your advice.

 

SEXHOUNDOG WHERE ARE YOU?

[SexhoundDog 18]

Quote

SEXHOUNDOG WHERE ARE YOU?

 

I'm still here Buck, just been busy and haven't checked in. Gosh, I don't have that much to add. But if you are enjoying e-mail fantasies and she doesn't have an ultra-sensitive firewall where she works and isn't worried about others viewing her screen, maybe try sending her a couple of sexy porn pics.

 

Let's hope we don't have to give up our fantasy and may it become a reality someday!

[wolfmaiden 15]

My hubby and I have talked about a mmf. The problem is how do we go about it???? He does not have any friends he hangs out with. He is a loner type person. He does talk about the mmf and how he would like to see another man do me from behind. He fantasizes about it while I am giving him head.

I also have a fantasy with him with another woman. When I fantasize it is like a feature length porno movie. I even have faces to some of these women. Maybe I should become a writer. lol

[DeesireCpl 15]

My partner and I have done many MMF , FFM and the group situation is all good ....I think the 3 sum fantasy has got to be the most popular fantasies next to 2 bisexual women making love.

 

One of my fantasies that I can only dream about is about 2 young bi males and myself watching and hhmmm maybe participating here and there .....wow something I know will never happen but hey it's fun to dream.

 

This lifestyle is all about fantasy and communication , respect and trust with all those in place you can have 1 hell of a time Even just telling your partner your fantasy is worth more than anything you can get in reality.

 

A word of advice to the newbie's some fantasies are just that a fantasy and better left in the mind , safer that way and way more fun!!!

[EricSacto2 19]

Originally posted by wolfmaiden

My hubby and I have talked about a mmf. The problem is how do we go about it???? He does not have any friends he hangs out with. He is a loner type person. He does talk about the mmf and how he would like to see another man do me from behind. He fantasizes about it while I am giving him head.

 

Watch out that she doesn't bite down on you by mistake. We were in a foursome once and I was doing the other wife and she was going down on her husband. In her excitement, she clamped down with her mouth. It slowed things down for a bit.