Does it matter?

[M1F2KTJ 473]

My wife says that unless a man is unusually small or unusually large that she can't tell a difference. She has good experiences with men she can "connect" with. I think I know what she means but I'll never know what it feels like as a woman.

 

When we started I/we never asked for statistics. It was a combination of personality and overall looks. The whole package. She has experienced men of all shapes and sizes. I started by picking men for her but now she is doing the picking. She graduated!

[njbm 2,901]

As a man with average endowment (I think!), I hate to see profiles that say the woman wants a man over "X" inches. It isn't the meat, it's the motion? Not being a woman, I don't know. My wife is small in height and weight and she is not excited by big tools, they can be uncomfortable. But to each her own!

[CostaRica 130]

Honestly, there have been times where I've come away from an encounter talking about how huge a guy was, only to see him again and find he was very average, he just did something different to what ibwas used to. So I would definitely agree with your wife, unless it's extreme, any sized dick can be mind blowing

[Guest]

My sweetie always told me size didn’t really matter, maybe a little thicker was better. But then we started swinging and with swinging there is greater honesty and openness in a relationship. I could noticed that even when it was short and thick, there were more moans early in the fucking. Then, we stumbled into an MFM and the guy had 9” and proportionately thick. And I had never seen her suck and fuck a dick like she did that one. Now, part of it I am sure was strictly psychological, especially the sucking part, not unlike when we guys get a girl with larger breasts or remarkable looking nipples. But, the fucking part, that was all very physical. Moreover, it was the first time that, the next day and the next weekend, she wanted to try to same club hoping to do it all again. It’s not what we guys want to hear, but that’s a true story.

[Scaredstiff 129]

I suppose it's male pride and all that , and I'm yet to swing so I have no experience but the size of the other guys cock is a worry of mine, sometimes when we're fantasizing I imagine her handling a big cock and it's a huge turn on , but in reality I honestly don't know how I would feel.

 

The way I try and look at it is I certainly haven't had any complaints yet and it's something I have no control over so I just need to crack on, I just hope that in the moment she's sensitive to my feelings and isn't screaming "oh my God I never had one so big" I think that would kill the moment for me , but like I say I'm yet to gain experience.

 

I do wonder though , would I be hurt if she said a guy was funnier than me ? Or cuter than me ? Probably not , I'm pretty sure I could handle that quite comfortably (I'm also pretty sure she wouldn't be so disrespectful to my feelings) So I don't know why I'm so hung up on cock size , I've never had anybody say a bad word about my cock , I know it's average in size , and thinking about it everybody I ever slept with wanted to come back for more.

 

Is this something I will learn to be comfortable with ? Or should I deal with my insecurities before swinging?

[leecny 23]

There was a study done I read about many years ago that showed women preferred watching gay porn over regular porn because even though the men weren't hung as well they were generally in a lot better shape than the guys in regular porn. I notice now that almost all the guys doing porn these days are in good shape so the makers must have listened.

 

Penis size is pretty far down on a woman's list of things that make her want to have sex with a particular man. For me, a well-groomed guy with some lean muscle and a 6-pack with an average-size penis is far preferable to a large penis on a guy who doesn't have anything else going for him.

[Scaredstiff 129]

Better start working on my six-pack then I suppose, oh and thanks for putting me off my bacon sandwich lol

[PSULioness 859]

I am new to this site. I am not officially a swinger but I am a woman who I think can share some experience. I guess from an early age, before I ever had sex, we joked about the guy with the big one or the guys calling someone little dick. I guess the same way they kidded about big boobs, which was way more apparent than the size of a dick. Sometimes we would joke about a bulge in a guys pants. The first ones I ever saw were not erect and not that big. My FIRST time sexually I finally was up close and personal I can only say it got much bigger than I thought it would. It was bigger than my hand. I was really scared like I guess most girls my age but eventually I didn't think about the size. The next guy I was with was maybe smaller but if he was maybe it wasn't by much. I remember a guy in college that was shy. We were in his room, all the lights were out. Usually foreplay would give you an idea, but this guy did all the foreplay to me and then we had sex. And it was very good sex that went on for some time. When we were finished he rolled onto his stomach. It wasn't till later that I saw that he was pretty small to others I had been with. I think he was afraid I would notice and say something. I did, I said boy that was great. I am not going to lie, seeing and playing with a larger one is visually exciting and I have had sex with ones more than two hands full and it did feel bigger at first but once we were into it it felt the same as most.

[kinksandpinks 46]

I'll chime in as a below average man. While I am very new to the LS, I have learned over the years that there is no sense in being insecure about it. Being below average is not going to stop you from playing but being insecure about it will. Most women seem to enjoy a variety of shapes and sizes. There are some women who only like big dicks. They enjoy the feeling of being filled to the max and that's ok. If a woman does not believe she will enjoy sex with me, it is fine because I'm not going to enjoy it if she's not. If she wants to try and it's not getting the job done then there are other ways to do it. It's no different than the fact that some ladies prefer clit stimulation over vaginally. Some ladies like anal and some do not. I find that the ones who only want big cock are in the minority and often times their husbands influence that. I understand that in the LS that my wife is going to fuck men with a bigger dick than me. I'm cool with that. We use toys that are bigger than me including some wearable toys for role play. Just have fun and enjoy yourself.

[Guest luvin eye full]

My sweetie always told me size didn’t really matter, maybe a little thicker was better. But then we started swinging and with swinging there is greater honesty and openness in a relationship. I could noticed that even when it was short and thick, there were more moans early in the fucking. Then, we stumbled into an MFM and the guy had 9” and proportionately thick. And I had never seen her suck and fuck a dick like she did that one. Now, part of it I am sure was strictly psychological, especially the sucking part, not unlike when we guys get a girl with larger breasts or remarkable looking nipples. But, the fucking part, that was all very physical. Moreover, it was the first time that, the next day and the next weekend, she wanted to try to same club hoping to do it all again. It’s not what we guys want to hear, but that’s a true story.

 

So how did that make you feel? When after the 1st big dick she wanted to go looking for it to do again?

Surly your own wife has gone wild on your cock too?

 

No i bet it's not what you want to here, but honestly with my wife i would of seen that kind of behavior all before in our own bed, sure the cock size may be different but the intensity never is.

[Guest luvin eye full]

I suppose it's male pride and all that , and I'm yet to swing so I have no experience but the size of the other guys cock is a worry of mine, sometimes when we're fantasising I imagine her handling a big cock and it's a huge turn on , but in reality I honestly don't know how I would feel.

The way I try and look at it is I certainly haven't had any complaints yet and it's something I have no control over so I just need to crack on, I just hope that in the moment she's sensitive to my feelings and isn't screaming "oh my God I never had one so big" I think that would kill the moment for me , but like I say Im yet to gain experience.

I do wonder though , would I be hurt if she said a guy was funnier than me ? Or cuter than me ? Probably not , I'm pretty sure I could handle that quite comfortably (I'm also pretty sure she wouldn't be so disrespectful to my feelings) So I don't know why I'm so hung up on cock size , I've never had anybody say a bad word about my cock , I know it's average in size , and thinking about it everybody I ever slept with wanted to come back for more.

Is this something I will learn to be comfortable with ? Or should I deal with my insecurities before swinging?

 

We all have different feelings at some stage just part of the LS, but you can rest assured that if you two are having great sex now then every thing will be ok, of course you may find it confronting at 1st until you find that your wife is still in love with the penis on the man she loves. no one will ever come close to you no matter how big he is. it will be a different feeling for her but better arh i do not think so,

 

i have been in some 3somes where the bigger fellow has lost his hard on just because he heard his wife moan differently then she does with him, by the way i always stop and check on the husband because they are both inviting you in to a 3some and its important to make sure everyone is ok - well that's how i see it anyway.

 

You should talk to your wife and let her know exactly how you feel and she should do the same - you may find your ok with it when it happens but she may feel upset when your with someone else ( i have seen it happen )

Take your time and i hope it all goes fine for you two.

 

Regards

[Scaredstiff 129]

Thanks for the words of wisdom!

I have talked about it with my wife numerous times and she says she loves my cock , she always has said this and has never said anything detrimental, I know it's just in my head , though to be honest since I made that post I feel like I've kinda moved past being so worried about it for now at least.

My new worry is coming too quickly lol, since we are getting closer to losing our swinger cherries our role play seems so much more real and intense and I swear as soon as she starts sucking on our dildo I'm ready to explode immediately, probably be even more excited when it's a real cock . I'm almost thinking it might be better just to get the first orgasm out of the way early so I can relax and enjoy the rest of the moment lol

[Guest luvin eye full]

Thanks for the words of wisdom!

I have talked about it with my wife numerous times and she says she loves my cock , she always has said this and has never said anything detrimental, I know it's just in my head , though to be honest since I made that post I feel like I've kinda moved past being so worried about it for now at least.

My new worry is coming too quickly lol, since we are getting closer to losing our swinger cherries our role play seems so much more real and intense and I swear as soon as she starts sucking on our dildo I'm ready to explode immediately, probably be even more excited when it's a real cock . I'm almost thinking it might be better just to get the first orgasm out of the way early so I can relax and enjoy the rest of the moment lol

 

Lol yer we get over one thing then bang something else, once you have a few good experiences you will be more even footed and so will your wife, probably the hardest thing will be finding someone that you both find respectful to your marriage, and when you do it will be a blast, one thing you now understand is how chicks feel about there bodies - the only difference (IMO ) is that they don't have willies to go down on them lol.

 

You may want to get the 1st one over with at home with the wife - depending on how long your recovery time is, you would not be the 1st to use this tact to even the night out a little, just thinking of this i knew a guy that kept a cock ring with him - granted he was more my age now but if al else failed he just put it on and of he'd go.

 

good luck guys.

[sexyliz1966 16]

We have been swinging of and on for the past 10 years and to be honest the size of a guys cock is not an issue as long he knows what to do and plus foreplay goes a long way :)is were we first started all be it were not sure but life is too short

 

Liz xx

[Scaredstiff 129]

Ha thanks guys, top cock ring tip by the way, might pack one as a safety blanket

[pilote 20]

...i have learned two things that matter in the game: staying hard, and then staminia...if you got those two mastered then size doesn't matter...

[SA_NewtoLS 163]

My sweetie always told me size didn’t really matter, maybe a little thicker was better. But then we started swinging and with swinging there is greater honesty and openness in a relationship. I could noticed that even when it was short and thick, there were more moans early in the fucking. Then, we stumbled into an MFM and the guy had 9” and proportionately thick. And I had never seen her suck and fuck a dick like she did that one. Now, part of it I am sure was strictly psychological, especially the sucking part, not unlike when we guys get a girl with larger breasts or remarkable looking nipples. But, the fucking part, that was all very physical. Moreover, it was the first time that, the next day and the next weekend, she wanted to try to same club hoping to do it all again. It’s not what we guys want to hear, but that’s a true story.

 

I dunno, we went to the club and ended up having sex with some complete strangers who joined us and while the guy was shorter than me, he was thicker and my wife loved it. I loved hearing about it and watching it as well. The nest day, she was actually, "complaining" a bit that he was so thick she was a little sore, but in a good way. I really don't care if she likes a dick bigger than mine and love hearing about it. We actually ran in to that same couple on our second trip to the club this weekend and spent some more time with them. Was a lot of fun watching her thoroughly enjoy getting pounded by that thick dick. As long as she enjoys herself, and the lady I am with enjoys herself, I am happy and love to hear about how much she enjoyed herself and why, even if the dick was bigger than mine, I love to hear about it.

[SA_NewtoLS 163]

Thanks for the words of wisdom!

I have talked about it with my wife numerous times and she says she loves my cock , she always has said this and has never said anything detrimental, I know it's just in my head , though to be honest since I made that post I feel like I've kinda moved past being so worried about it for now at least.

My new worry is coming too quickly lol, since we are getting closer to losing our swinger cherries our role play seems so much more real and intense and I swear as soon as she starts sucking on our dildo I'm ready to explode immediately, probably be even more excited when it's a real cock . I'm almost thinking it might be better just to get the first orgasm out of the way early so I can relax and enjoy the rest of the moment lol

 

Same thing was happening to me, then during our first experience with another couple, I had a little difficulty even keeping it up for the other woman and had to switch back to my wife a bit to get it back up. I also came 4 times, which is not exactly normal for me at home with the wife. It's normally one and then bed time, though we do plan sexy evenings sometimes where I'll go once, rest a bit and go a second sometimes third time after another break. Not to mention going a 5th time once we got home by ourselves and then again in the morning, which was really only 2 hours later. Was totally different with another couple there though. My recovery time was much faster and could pretty much just keep on going.

 

It's obviously going to be different for everyone, but that was my experience. It's sometimes hard to keep it up for someone not my wife. However, watching the wife helps that a bit and after cumming, with everything going on, I come back for more rounds much much quicker than normal.

[cplnluv1 874]

For me a man who is big is more of a visual excitement than a physical one and he has to be very big to make that difference. Our first couple was with a couple where he was very big. We went with this couple because of a picture they sent us. We thought it was fake. Our real search was a bi woman. We laughed at his picture. I don't know if I was attracted to the size or fearful or just curious. I admit orally it was a challenge. The sex I had with him was very short. So it wasn't great sex. Most men I have been with are in a normal range. Some smaller, some bigger. The men who are smaller either are shyer but try to make up for what they think is their lack of size. I normally don't know the difference.

[sweetsnspeed 52]

So, what is considered 'Normal size'? Are we talking the Scientific study average, or is there another 'normal size' when it comes to the lifestyle?

[cplnluv1 874]

So, what is considered 'Normal size'? Are we talking the Scientific study average, or is there another 'normal size' when it comes to the lifestyle?

 

If you go by emails we have received, the average is 7+". Not that I take out a yard stick, I have an idea how wide my hand is, the average is 5"-6". Guys who say that they have a fat one, oy, I have no clue to what that measures. I think my hand is 3 1/2" wide. I have met men more than 2 hands. Think they measure horses in hands and that's 4". I'm laughing now because I picture some of you measuring now.

[sweetsnspeed 52]

cplnluv1 lol.

But we do love your confidence in using a yardstick to measure!

He said he's heading off to the hardware store to get a 25' tape measure. lol

[GoldCoCouple 4,068]

There is no 'normal', just an average.