Do you think swinging is growing?

[kikonkrome 844]

Do you think swinging in general and alternative lifestyles are growing. Do you see more or less people participating than in previous years?

[oc1234 435]

I don't know, but I sure hope so. My wife and I are in a poly relationship with our best friend Bill and it's fabulous. We've been playing with him since the mid 80s.

[Guest]

Yes, I do. I base this on the observation of people getting into it at seemingly younger ages.

[Lionheart72 2,189]

Do you think swinging in general and alternative lifestyles are growing. Do you see more or less people participating than in previous years?

 

I think the internet has made the concept of swinging, and alternative lifestyles in general, more accessible. When I was 21, I had no idea what swinging was. Today, a 21 year old just needs to Google it. So, in that, I think information about alternative lifestyles are reaching more people. This has two effects: 1) people who might be suited to the alternative lifestyle but didn't know it are now more likely to join and 2) with broader general public knowledge, alternative lifestyles become discussed more openly and so more widely acknowledged if not accepted.

 

In general, I suspect the percentage of the population of people mentally suited to swinging is relatively constant but now more of those people have greater access to the lifestyle.

[victoria'dreams 141]

I believe that in the past because of no internet and the difficulty to access other swingers, the swinger community was very important to bring people together and the key to the lifestyle. Today it is more individualist and because of the internet you can do almost any sexual experience you want without the need to enter a community; Embracing or not the rules of the lifestyle will still give you an access key.

 

Probably it is the same amount of people doing these experiences; greater access to find others; no more THE lifestyle and THE community but each individual/couple making their own route and recipe. I would say younger people now do swing but the community core stay an older generation.

[junkyard38 21]

In my personal observation,and in total agreement with chick couple, that the participants are getting younger. Then we enter upon another issue, with younger participants we then enter the drug scene. Younger folks there seems to be a clannish atmosphere also. For myself the older generation is the area I am comfortable with.

[cplnuswing 4,712]

My take on it is the actual growth has plateaued. Still plenty of new swingers coming along, but I don't think the numbers are growing as fast as they did back in the 2000's. As others have above have mentioned, I think that growth spurt was directly related to the internet. The internet made it easy for us just like it did so many others. If the only option we had was the old school route with the ads in the magazines, etc. there there would have been about a 0.0001% chance we would have gone to that much trouble and done that.

 

Even though I think the actual numbers are just keeping pace, what I do think has grown, and perhaps gives the perception the actual numbers are growing faster than they really are, is that you just hear so much more about swinging and other alternate lifestyles today. Most people still prefer to keep their private lives private, but there has been a definite increase in the number who are willing to be out about it, and the media, especially digital media, is more willing to talk about it in a more or less evenhanded way compared to how it used to be. I'm not sure swingers are really all that more out about it though compared to our poly friends and other groups, but we are getting the benefit of it even though we may not quite be punching our weight on that.

[MatePerfect 17]

I would tend to say yes, but it's hard to put a number on it. I agree that the internet has made it much easier and I probably wouldn't be involved if it didn't exist.

[JandKinBoise 858]

If there was an actual church style God, I'm sure he'd be saying "Wow! Nice move with the internet thing there Satan."

Swinging, gay sex, group sex, all were much more difficult to do. Now with it right there in front of us, much easier. And tempting.

[GoldCoCouple 4,064]

It's growing, but mostly because the internet makes it easier to connect. Back in the 70's/80's you had to do everything by snail mail and mostly sight unseen but now it's almost instant connection and you are able to looks at hundreds of other interested parties instantly. Also, it seems like younger women are much more open to the idea and 'aged' women (like fine wine is ages) are more curious. The difficult part is to have a relationship strong enough to talk openly about the possibilities and taking that first step.

[MatePerfect 17]

Still, while we all praise the internet, I must say that in recent years I have the feeling that it's doing some harm as well. I think the ideal situation was in the early 2000's. Let me try to explain. 15 years ago many people had internet and a PC, so it was possible to connect and find out about what's going on, but people couldn't carry around their devices and making & sharing pictures/videos was much harder. In other words, what you did offline, stayed offline as long as you didn't do something completely outrageous. Today, almost everyone has a smartphone and people are constantly making pictures. I think that this has led many to restrain more self-control and fewer people just let go and enjoy the moment. Everyone is afraid that, if they do something "stupid", like getting drunk, they will be on camera and all their friends on "social media" will know within half an hour. Don't get me wrong, but when I read that young adults have less sex than ever before and are hooking up less, I'm not surprised. Most young people are extremely concerned about self-image and all that stuff. I think the internet is great, but I'm not sure if we are not headed into the wrong direction and if that's not the reason why the big growth years for swinger clubs are over, like many here have said.

 

Sorry for the rant :P

[kikonkrome 844]

@MatePerfect I'm not sure if I agree with that.

 

I think attendance is down at clubs because you can hook up online and get a hotel. I have also noticed within that last few years a lot more clubs, meet and greets, and hotel take overs opening up. Certainly there were more for us to choose from this NYE than ever before in past (like five-six events). Plus the event we picked was packed!!! More people than ever!!

 

I do not have a comment on the sex lives of young adults, from what I can see it still seems to be going strong, but I have not checked any sources.

[EastInWest 1,524]

I've mentioned before, I am in my mid-30s and Mrs. EastInWest is in her mid-to-late 40s. I can't comment on changes in swinging in particular, but I will say that I definitely think the stigma regarding group sex is on the decline. MFM/FMF was almost always at least a topic of sexual small talk with a woman, even if there was no serious interest, and even Mrs. EastInWest, relatively sheltered as she was, was aware that younger men were more likely to have a serious interest in going through with FMF. I think it's seen less as something only a deviant would do to more of a litmus test for being open-minded/adventurous.

 

This might account for some of the observation about more young people getting involved in swinging. The relationship dynamics might still be scandalous/controversial, but the sexual dynamics are not nearly so. Maybe access to porn has made it seem a little less outrageous to have an audience, as well. That some of these things actually happen remains jaw-dropping to Mrs. EastInWest.

[older couple 132]

My wife and I have been swinging for 40 years married 44. In the early days, swingers had to be secret. If it ever got out, it could actually get you fired, kids made fun of at school, scorned by all that knew, and so on. It was subject you couldn't just talk about in ordinary conversations. But today, you can find the subject of poly marriages, moms who are strippers the dad goes to work during the day, and mom strips from 7 to 12 at night when he gets home and he takes care of the kids, subject of swinging, discussions about nudists, discussions of STDs, sex toys, a six year old boy getting his 12 year old baby sitter pregnant and having the boy and girl plus the six year old child 6 years later on TV for all to see is on talk shows, public radio talk shows, plus our movies today are and TV shows are full of sexual talk and R rated movies are full of sexual scenes and now full front nude shot of men are so common. Plus kids everywhere can get any sexual sight on the net. They know more about sex at younger ages than any my age ever did. A young swinger mom 28 years old told my wife just two months a go that she got caught by her three young boys with her swinger partner. Her husband and her had a talk with the boys explaining their life style. The boys asked if they were going to get a divorce. They said absolutely not we love each other and don't have plans to ever divorce. The three boys smiled jumped up and down and cheered and hugged their parents and said, oh thank God. So and so's parents are swingers and they got a divorce. Now how about that for discussion?

[kcjones 59]

While the internet offers much help for those already in the lifestyle or those researching it, I believe television is the real catalyst. In the past 5 years there has been more lifestyle based content on TV, than there has been in the previous history of television. You aren't likely to stumble upon a lifestyle site online, unless its porn (You don't find porn, it finds you), but previews for shows/movies such as: You Me Her, Swingtown, The Overnight, Secret Sex Live: Swingers, Swinger Wives, Neighbors with Benefits, etc. are much more likely to provide new lifestyle exposure to vanilla viewers.

[dan63 106]

In addition to the fact that both the internet and other media exposure of the lifestyle certainly spreads knowledge, probably a more important aspect of this exposure is the "normalization" of the lifestyle. You are much less likely to do something "abnormal" if you think you are the only person in the world that wants to do it. If you are one of thousands/millions of people into this behavior, then you are no longer so "abnormal."