What is the first move?

[Miishon 20]

We are looking forward to going to our first club. We are going with the expectations of having a great night dancing and enjoying each other. If we are lucky enough to find another couple and we are getting along, what is the fist move to know if they are interested or not. We have decided if we are lucky we only want soft swap or just enjoy kissing and touching. So, my question is what is the first move?

[two4youinswva 3,068]

Welcome to the board!

 

You certainly have the right attitude going in; having a good time and enjoying each other.

 

Now, if you connect with another couple and the two of you think you'd like to do something with them, just let them know you are interested in a little fun with them. It is generally recommended that the female make the inquiry to the other female and allows that couple time to confer privately.

[njbm 2,903]

Usuallly you can tell when there is a four way match. All four people engage in talking, there is eye contact and a happy vibe. When the other wife says she is going to the bar for a drink and doesn't come back(happened to us last month), it's not going to happen.

[DjRayder 43]

Welcome and yes as two4youinswva stated the female is the best bet to make the first steps in engaging a couple.But if she happens to be the shy one in the group you can use being a "newbie" to an advantage.Make small talk and say this is your first time in this club and lifestyle.Many couples jump at the chance to be a newbies first couple.But just be yourselves have fun and if nothing happens the first night make friends.And hopefully something happens at the next one.Good luck!

[kikonkrome 844]

Usuallly you can tell when there is a four way match. All four people engage in talking, there is eye contact and a happy vibe. When the other wife says she is going to the bar for a drink and doesn't come back(happened to us last month), it's not going to happen.

 

It's only funny because it's true.

 

Our best practice at a swing club is basically to engage as many people in conversation as you can and are willing to engage. Surprising things happen. Best case scenario has been described, all four of you talk, make jokes and have fun. The conversation from their easily flows to 'finding a room' or private space. What you would like, etc.

 

That being said do not set your sights on one couple and follow them around like puppy dogs (it's happened to us).

 

Try and stay standing and mingle, a funny one liner can lead to 'Hey come meet my wife'

 

Say positive things...last night I told a lady how much I loved her smile...went on to meet her SO, etc.

 

Optimally you guys will be so attractive people will be asking you!!

 

Enjoy and have fun!!

[Miishon 20]

Thank you for all the advice!! Sounds like it will be a great time. Can't wait to get this party started. This board is great, full of wonderful information.

[GoldCoCouple 4,068]

First move: Hi! How are you doing tonight.

 

If you think everyone is interested in more, then the second move is: So, would you like to go play?

[njbm 2,903]

We had a weird weekend. We went to a lifestyle weekend. We made a nice connection with two couples.(on different days). We think something will happen. We find out the husbands are ready for the LS, not the wives. Ok, we made nice friends and maybe we'll play next time we meet.

[kikonkrome 844]

We had a weird weekend. We went to a lifestyle weekend. We made a nice connection with two couples.(on different days). We think something will happen. We find out the husbands are ready for the LS, not the wives. Ok, we made nice friends and maybe we'll play next time we meet.

 

Not that uncommon actually. The husbands say they are ready, women are just there to observe. That's why women lead the way.

[GoldCoCouple 4,068]

Yes, that's one reason some people stay away from nubies, not knowing if they are ready and/or are bringing drama to the table. Maybe next time...?