First swinging event, need advice!!

[kamikins39 15]

My boyfriend and I are planning on attending our first swinging event this Saturday. I just want some advice and details on how things go. I also would like to know if early 20s is not common. I did ask the host but he responded with pussy is pussy and cock is cock. Not very helpful. Any advice would be very much appreciated.

Thank you.

[njbm 2,880]

Go, observe, see what happens. Part of the fun is that you don't know in advance what is going to happen. Whatever we think is going to happen is not what happens.

[Scaredstiff 129]

From my experience in the UK, couples in their early twenties that visit clubs are rare, but also when we started going to clubs we realised that age is less important than we thought, like minded people are like minded regardless of age so you will still have a good time chatting and getting to know people, we never asked anybody about their age while at the club but I'd guess that most were 35-45 and probably about 15% of the couples were older than that and roughly 15% were younger but probably only 1 or 2 couples under 30.

 

I have to say I'm quite surprised by the hosts attitude , I hope you've checked out reviews of the place where you're going?

 

My main advice would be don't think of the bigger picture (swapping, getting naked etc) just focus on getting through the door and ordering a drink, by the time you've finished that first drink you will probably have already chatted to a few people and be feeling much more comfortable.

Just take things one step at a time, at our first club we just chatted over a few drinks with some of the regular members, eventually we moved upstairs and had some fun between just the two of us and we thoroughly enjoyed that as a first experience, there wasn't any need or overwhelming desire to take things any further that night.

The main thing we took from that night was just how surprised we were about how relaxed we felt, that wasn't down to us being super cool sex adventurers I can assure you, it was just the relaxed atmosphere in the place, everybody there was really respectful and non judgemental, it was a bit like going to a normal nightclub minus the dick heads

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

BAD ANSWER! I would think about just finding another event to attend if this is their attitude (and it probably is an indirect way of saying that the crowd will be older). Anyways, please let us know what you decide to do and how it was. Good luck and have fun (if you do go).

[PSULioness 857]

Just answering as someone in her 20s. I am not experienced at all and I don't know if I could go to club. The thing is if clubs are all older, I would be very uncomfortable. Think about it, the majority are going to be your parents age. I, and again I am not experienced, would only consider people maybe up to 10 years older. Maybe older couples are not as fixed on age. Do you really want someone 20 years older approaching you?

[cplnuswing 4,713]

The answer you got from the club owner raises a red flag for me about how well this venue is operated. I bring that up because your first club visit is both scary and exciting, and I would hate for a bad first experience to be something that might turn you off on the whole idea. Probably will turn out fine, but just remember, just because you walked in the door doesn't mean you can't walk back out five minutes later if you already know this isn't the place for you. Just leave, go find something else fun to do that night, and then do some more research and try again somewhere else. All swingers clubs/events are not created equal.

 

Another tip that some do is before you even pay to go in, just sit in the car for a 15 minutes watching others go in. That will tell you a lot about the crowd and whether or not that club and crowd is a good fit.

 

Hope you have a great time!

[dan63 106]

We are certainly not pros in the LS, only been to a club twice, but the response you got from the Host is really rather unsettling. Not the type of thing I would expect from a "veteran" of the LS. I am assuming this is a house party and not a club, if so curious how you came to be invited to the party. Do you already know anyone that is going to be there?

 

As others advised, I would look for another event. The first time is too important to have a bad time.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

BAD ANSWER! I would think about just finding another event to attend. . .

With this I agree.

[Miss_Piggy 98]

Hopefully the line, "pussy is pussy and cock is cock" was taken from a longer, more complete answer... otherwise, I completely agree with above posters. Red flag.

[qhg11586 16]

I agree.

[kamikins39 15]

We decided not to go. Thanks for your answers.

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

I think you made the correct decision. Now, start planning your next visit...

[cplnuswing 4,713]

I know that was probably disappointing after being all pumped up for it, but I do think it was the right decision. When something seems headed off the tracks from the get-go, then it rarely if ever gets better. That's true in life but especially so in swinging.

 

Like GoldCoCouple said, now start planning another night out to a place you really have a good feeling about and can have a fantastic first night out.

[SA_NewtoLS 163]

Another tip that some do is before you even pay to go in, just sit in the car for a 15 minutes watching others go in. That will tell you a lot about the crowd and whether or not that club and crowd is a good fit.

 

I don't know if this is the norm at most clubs or not, but we tried to do something similar our first trip to the club, though not really scouting, just talking and preparing ourselves. The security guard walked up and knocked on our window, told us we either needed to go in or go away. Did not think about it before that, but I actually really like this. I wouldn't want someone sitting in the parking lot keeping an eye on who comes and goes, could be someone I know, or someone just trying to out people cause they are against this type of behavior. Apparently, being the only club in town, they have had issues with this before, so now offer free valet parking and monitor the parking lot.

[dan63 106]

The club we go to has parking lot security. Same reason I'm sure.