Straight guys into MFM. Do your friends know?

[Fantasyfetish99 18]

Sorry... Not trying to make a blanket statement here, but why do most people automatically think a guy is gay or bi-curious, just because he wants to have a MFM with his wife? Or that he doesn't love his wife, because no man that loves his wife would ever let another man fuck her... This is something that I have encountered with my friends as well as ppl on other forums.

 

I had a situation happen the other day with another couple my wife and I hang out with often. We were playing a game and the topic of would you rather have a threesome with another female or another guy? My wife is the only person who knows that I want to have a MFM, so she knows not to say anything to other people about it. It's not something I'm ashamed about, but I don't feel like explaining myself to another dude who is going to think I'm gay/bi no matter how strong my case is. Anyway... the other guy chimes in right away saying "that's a stupid question... obviously me and (insert name) would want another girl. Only gay guys would want a male." I just laughed about it, but it honestly agitated me a little bit.

 

Now I know what you're thinking... you need to get better friends. They are actually good guys though, just really ignorant when it comes to stuff like this.

 

The funny part is that if some of my guy friends knew this about me, I'm pretty sure most of them would be down for fucking my wife. Once they can get over their homophobe tendencies.

[Lionheart72 2,190]

Interestingly, I know no one who thinks that wanting to have a MFM means the guy is bi. My wife and I have done MFM frequently and the bisexual male contact has never even come up.

 

Honestly, I wonder if someone pictures a MFM threesome, and immediately thinks of the two guys going at it, is that someone bi-curious themselves. Mind you, I am bi-curious and I don't think of two guys going at it in an MFM threesome, so whatever...

[cplnuswing 4,713]

I've encountered exactly what FantasyFetish is describing - a friend strongly proclaiming that 1) any guy interested in a MFM threesome must be bi, and 2) no man that loves his wife would be ok with another guy fucking her. And yes, these are otherwise good guys who aren't Neanderthals about relationships, conservative about sex in general, etc.

 

My only answer is that for some, swinging Does . Not . Compute. For others, FMF or couple on couple may kinda make sense to them, but MFM? Does . Not . Compute. They seriously just can't wrap their minds around it, and so the easiest way to avoid that is just to make some broad blanket statements to keep the subject put to rest.

[Fantasyfetish99 18]

The ironic part is that my friends would suck a dick for X amount of dollars, but I'm the gay one for wanting to rock my wife's world.

 

By the way... I'm in my late 20s just in case you were wondering about how old my friends are.

[Scaredstiff 129]

Another good reason why you should keep your swinging life and vanilla life separated, go somewhere that swingers hangout and pretty much everybody will be cool with the idea of mfm, due mainly to the honesty of the participants, as in they are happy admitting what turns them on, like you say most of your friends would probably be up for it but probably aren't ready to admit it's a turn on. They probably watch mfm porn all the time.

[JandKinBoise 858]

Much of what is said in a group like yours is based on upbringing, not true feelings. Assuming a guy would have to be gay to be naked with another man reeks of church and homophobic influence and how he wishes to be perceived.

We would actively look for bi men for mmf. They are kinda rare. Plenty of straight guys willing to team up but few wanting to play for both sides.

I think you'll see this attitude shift as you age. It's a bummer that our best sex years are usually wasted with jealousy, insecurity and homophobia.

[Exhibitionist 38]

I've done the MFM thing a couple times. It feels so good to just be naked sexual beings with each other and not being concerned about sexuality. I have never had insecurities about it. I am technically straight but I have been bi-curious lately. I've been talking to a really hot male and female couple and they both want to fuck me badly. The condition is that he gets anything she gets. It seriously never aroused me before, but I am thinking I might really enjoy it. I'm thinking I will take them up on it. Just the thought of us writhing on the bed or having sex free of all inhibition is a major turn on for me. That doesn't mean that all MFM encounters have to involve gay/bi sex. My first two MFM encounters were with guys I had no sexual attraction to, the only thing we had in common sexually is that we both had sex with the same girl. The closest it ever came to male on male is that we both penetrated the same hole at the same time, and that was only one of the two MFM encounters I've had. The other one was a girl a buddy of mine and I had picked up at the bar and she couldn't make up her mind which one of us she wanted, so we made it easier for her by having a threesome.

[Guest]

We have done 10 or so MFM and, to put it bluntly, they have been all about me, no man on man contact whatsoever ever. Excuse the pun but the issue of bi or gay activity or even contact between the two men have never arisen.

[BobGann 40]

I've been in quite a few MFM situations, and it's never been an issue. Women last a long time if you warm them up right, so sometimes it takes more than one guy to get the job done!

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

I remember seeing a poll here years ago which asked the question which would you prefer, FMF or MFM. Ok, the results are biased as it was all readers of this forum taking the poll But, among guys the answer was 2:1 in favor of MFM. Personally, I love MFMs as I love seeing my wife enjoy being the center of attention and having non-stop sex.

[me4cplay 22]

The friends that need to know, know! Those that don't need to know don't know! I am very discreet not just with my lifestyle friends but all my friends MFM to me means we are trying to make her the center of our attention. I am focused on making her happy, if our penises touch oh well I am not there for him or myself but her. I don't think I am gay or bi. I think I am just in touch with who and what I am. A person who wants to bring joy to my sexual partner the lady!

[J&Wu 408]

I like Ladies and am happy to have as many naked guys as want to join the fun. Some Ladies can handle 3 or 4 at once, keeps us too busy with her or masturbating/donning condoms to fool with each other.

[padoc 1,703]

MFM, when done right, is ALL about the woman. Over the years we've had at least a dozen with some repeats. None involved male on male action. Mrs Doc is completely uninterested and Im hardly gay because I enjoy being part of making her feel sexy, erotic and ultimately totally satisfied. And what JandK said!!!

[Numex 2,416]

. .I think you'll see this attitude shift as you age. It's a bummer that our best sex years are usually wasted with jealousy, insecurity and homophobia.

Good point. When I was younger I would have been jealous of my girl fucking another man. Now my only concern is if my wife is happy.

[twohots4u2 188]

MFMs are great! It is difficult to find another couple where all four find mutual attraction. However, we have found that by screening the guys, I can easily find two or three guys that my gal will find attractive and want to have join us for sex play. Plus, she loves to have three guys playing with her, one for each nipple and one for her clit.

[Guest]

In "Some Cases" I have found that men who are openly homophobic are actually harbouring gay or bisexual feelings themselves, but are perhaps not open minded enough to understand those feelings, or perhaps feel guilty about such things. It's actually a known fact that a HUGE AMOUNT of people actually have their first sexual experiences with the same sex. That sure the guy might grow up to be 100% straight but in many cases during his early teens his first sexual experiences was playing with other boys, and the same goes for females, that many people have their first sexual experiences with the same sex.

 

Within my life I have known a few guys who have been outwardly homophobic and acted 100% straight at all times. These are the type of guys who make nasty gay jokes / who openly say gay men disgust them / the type of guys who want the world to think they are a super strong straight male. Yet over the years as the friendships have become closer I have had several of these guys admit that they do actually have fantasies about been with another man sexually. I remember one guy specifically, he was perhaps the straightest and most homophobic person I'd ever met, until one night after drinking he actually broke down into tears and in a drunk state admitted that he had been having dreams about sleeping with other guys for some years, but lets say his mind didn't know how to handle such things and it was obviously causing him some distress.

 

If you remember the film "American Beauty" then that held a perfect example of homophobic yet sexually confused man. In the film American Beauty there was a strict father who had spent his entire life in the US armed forces. The man could have only been described as strict / over bearing / anti gay / a seemingly straight laced army man who did everything by the book. In the end however it turned out he was hiding feelings for other men which was enough to cause him severe mental health issues. He was ashamed of such thoughts which in turn caused him to act super homophobic in an attempt to hide his feelings from the world.

 

Anyway..........

 

 

TWO POINTS jump out regarding your post.

 

1) Bisexual Guys: Yes it is true that if you have MFM threesomes a lot of other guys can jump to the conclusion that your a secret gay or even bisexual man who simply wants to have sex with other men. That your inviting other men to fuck your wife because secretly deep down you fancy men. However the point I'd like to make is to NOT rule out bisexual men as potential play options.

 

I mean over the years I have heard several couples / females basically saying any man who advertises himself as been bisexual is a turn off, when in reality the vast majority of bisexual guys would be more than happy to take part in straight MFM friendship. The word bisexual doesn't mean the guy HAS TO have sex with another man, it just means they are perhaps open minded to playing with another man as well as a women.

 

I get messages all the time from STRAIGHT GUYS basically saying:

 

"Hey I know my profile says I'm straight but really I'd not mind sucking your dick"

 

I mean in reality you could meet a STRAIGHT GUY tomorrow and have your MFM threesome, but in reality that straight guy might have actually fucked 10 different guys in his life. That someone simply saying they are STRAIGHT doesn't mean they have always been straight, doesn't mean they have never touched another guy.

 

Guess I feel that bisexual guys sometimes get a rough time of things. Been bisexual doesn't actually mean YOU HAVE TO sleep with another man, it just means your open minded to the idea. Like stated most bisexual guys would be perfectly happy just playing with the women with no male on male contact at all, so as a couple or even single female I'd not rule our bi guys as an option.

 

 

2) Friends: You mentioned in your post that you had been talking to some friends and the subject of threesomes came up in casual conversation and it sounds like you did a good job of avoiding any issues. But just to clarify that in my experience it is an award winning and terribly bad idea to let any of your friends know about your lifestyle or sexual choices. That basically it is an horrifically bad idea to let any of your friends / work mates know that your interested in swinging, and it doesn't matter if your interested in MFM / MMF / FMF / FFM.

 

Honestly you could jump in bed with 10 single women, you and your wife could fuck hot attractive women and its still a terribly bad idea to let other people know your business. Basically NEVER tell your friends about your sexual adventures, be that with men or women. Sadly friends can not be trusted, and usually if you tell just 1 friend about your desires to explore threesomes then within a month virtually every friend you have will end up knowing.

 

If you tell even 1 friend about your desires to explore group sex then that news can travel back to your other friends / family / workplace / and so on. Plus some people have very different reactions to the idea of group sex, some people might think its cool where others are totally 100% disgusted by the idea and will label you as a deviant sexual pervert.

 

Many years ago now I made the mistake of speaking to a friend about this subject and admitted that I enjoyed MMF / MFF threesomes and within the space of a few months I'd be labelled by half my friends as a closest gay boy who wanted random men to bang my girlfriend.

 

Personally I avoid the subject with anyone that I'd class as a friend and focus on meeting people outside my normal everyday life.

[BlueStagg 57]

My friends do not know. Pretty much for two reasons.

 

1. I don't want to explain it. I am 100% straight. I don't want all the questions about why I'd want another man to have sex with my wife. It's a desire I cannot explain

 

2. I like to keep that world away from my vanilla world and I don't really want my friends looking to sleep with her.

[Bluespruce1 706]

We find that very few couples can understand our lifestyle choices so we choose to keep things private. We are known as nudists, sluts and perverts among some of our friends so we choose to not try to explain. We are also the only ones with a solid marriage and are always together having fun.

[BlueStagg 57]

We find that very few couples can understand our lifestyle choices so we choose to keep things private. We are known as nudists, sluts and perverts among some of our friends so we choose to not try to explain. We are also the only ones with a solid marriage and are always together having fun.

 

Funny you say that. Of my vanilla friends, so many have very rocky marriages and love time away from their spouse. I'm the opposite. I HATE time away. She's not only my wife but my best friend. That's how I'm so confident in doing this with her

[PeterJ 948]

1) I get messages all the time from STRAIGHT GUYS basically saying: "Hey I know my profile says I'm straight but really I'd not mind sucking your dick"

 

2) Friends: ...in my experience it is an award winning and terribly bad idea to let any of your friends know about your lifestyle or sexual choices...Basically NEVER tell your friends about your sexual adventures, be that with men or women. Sadly friends can not be trusted, and usually if you tell just 1 friend about your desires to explore threesomes then within a month virtually every friend you have will end up knowing...some people might think its cool where others are totally 100% disgusted by the idea and will label you as a deviant sexual pervert...Personally I avoid the subject with anyone that I'd class as a friend and focus on meeting people outside my normal everyday life.

 

To the first point, that’s occasionally been my experience as well. In the heat of of the moment I’ve had guys who didn’t identify as bi fondle my balls while I was fucking their wives, or join their wives in sucking my cock.

 

Sun&Moon’s second point is very important. Revealing your non-traditional sexual identity to others is a bell that cannot be unrung. Sexuality is a core human quality. Swingers represent such a small minority of the population that if friends and co-workers know that about you, in their mind it will be the most prominent identifier.

 

For example, I was for part of my career a manager in the U.S. arm of a global corporation. A senior executive from a competitor was recruited to head our company. Rumors swirled that he’d met his then-wife at a swingers party. He was a tone-deaf executive whose tenure was relatively brief, and while there are many things about him I should recall, that he and his wife MIGHT have been swingers is what I primarily recall more than 30 years after the last time I saw him.

[BlueStagg 57]

To the first point, that’s occasionally been my experience as well. In the heat of of the moment I’ve had guys who didn’t identify as bi fondle my balls while I was fucking their wives, or join their wives in sucking my cock.

 

Sun&Moon’s second point is very important. Revealing your non-traditional sexual identity to others is a bell that cannot be unrung. Sexuality is a core human quality. Swingers represent such a small minority of the population that if friends and co-workers know that about you, in their mind it will be the most prominent identifier.

 

For example, I was for part of my career a manager in the U.S. arm of a global corporation. A senior executive from a competitor was recruited to head our company. Rumors swirled that he’d met his then-wife at a swingers party. He was a tone-deaf executive whose tenure was relatively brief, and while there are many things about him I should recall, that he and his wife MIGHT have been swingers is what I primarily recall more than 30 years after the last time I saw him.

 

To each their own. Me personally, outside of some incidental contact, I don't want to be touching another man in that way. I get my rocks off observing my wife enjoying sex from view points I'd never normally see.

 

I'm not judging those who are bi, or bi curious. Just not my thing.

[Numex 2,416]

... We are known as nudists, sluts and perverts among some of our friends so we choose to not try to explain. We are also the only ones with a solid marriage and are always together having fun.

In a study conducted by a conservative Christian polling firm, Barna, Evangelicals have the highest divorce rate; Lutherans, atheists and lesbians the lowest. (Didn't mention "nudists, sluts and perverts," sorry.) It seems that if you want to stay together, it's best to not have any rules except love your spouse as you would yourself.

[Newb_Couple 28]

My wife started asking me if I would be alright with an MFM a about a year ago, we talk about it during foreplay and sex. But I would never consider an MFM as gay in anyway. I’m fine with my wife’s request and look forward to the future when we can make it happen. For me it’s about showing her and her skill set off, to her it’s about showing off as well. We’ve talked about and made up some ground rules already, some in loser on then her but..do t worry about what people think or say, this is about you 2 having an experience that’s it! Gay doesn’t play into it unless it was openly discussed prior.

[BlueStagg 57]

My wife started asking me if I would be alright with an MFM a about a year ago, we talk about it during foreplay and sex. But I would never consider an MFM as gay in anyway. I’m fine with my wife’s request and look forward to the future when we can make it happen. For me it’s about showing her and her skill set off, to her it’s about showing off as well. We’ve talked about and made up some ground rules already, some in loser on then her but..do t worry about what people think or say, this is about you 2 having an experience that’s it! Gay doesn’t play into it unless it was openly discussed prior.

 

Fully agree. I get off on my wife's pleasure during an MFM. Very intense when I get her alone afterwards

[Gab32421 25]

The ironic part is that my friends would suck a dick for X amount of dollars, but I'm the gay one for wanting to rock my wife's world.

 

By the way... I'm in my late 20s just in case you were wondering about how old my friends are.

 

There’s ur answer. MFM are about the woman.

[Newb_Couple 28]

In my case, we would be in an MFM together. I’m not really into idly standing by and watching. I’m in there bruh! Lol

[BlueStagg 57]

In my case, we would be in an MFM together. I’m not really into idly standing by and watching. I’m in there bruh! Lol

 

I also like to be involved, but at times I will step back and admire my wife's beauty while she fucks

[Numex 2,416]

... why do most people automatically think a guy is gay or bi-curious, just because he wants to have a MFM with his wife? Or that he doesn't love his wife, because no man that loves his wife would ever let another man fuck her...

Your overlooking the fact that I'm also MFMing with his wife. Or that I'm MFMing with a guy and a woman who is the wife of a third guy. Or my wife is MFMing without me. Or that sometimes I'm FMFing, with or without my wife... I don't have a gay side, but my wife definitely has a Lesbian side.

[Newb_Couple 28]

Stepping back to observe for a moment is fine, I get that. But the whole cuckold thing just isn’t my bag, it’s very specific.

[BlueStagg 57]

Stepping back to observe for a moment is fine, I get that. But the whole cuckold thing just isn’t my bag, it’s very specific.

 

Oh no way! I'm in the same boat as you. Not only am I not into humiliation, my wife is 100% against it as well.

[shy_couple 459]

I’m not sure that most people make that assumption. At least not in the lifestyle.

 

No gay or bi-curiosities from hubby plus she doesn’t find that type of play appealing at all. Things may bump or touch but for the most part it’s about her. And that is the target of most MFM threesomes. Hell, I remember a couple we played with regularly early on. We were new. They were not a lot more experienced than us. He was giving her anal missionary. She was adamant that I play with her pussy. So I did what the lady wanted. Yep, I touched his dick as it was plowing her butt l, but still don’t feel it was gay or got no sexual pleasure from that incidental touch but got a ton of pleasure watching her get fired up and into it.

 

No, not gay.

[Newb_Couple 28]

My wife wouldn’t allow it either, now if he’s fucking her and she’s blowing me and she starts saying how good his dick feels, I don’t find that humiliating. She’s just doing color commentary.

[couplers 4,640]

My guys are not gay, but they'll do whatever it takes to get theirs from me (or Lora or Clair) when it's two guys and one woman.

[jeff111 44]

In a study conducted by a conservative Christian polling firm, Barna, Evangelicals have the highest divorce rate; Lutherans, atheists and lesbians the lowest. (Didn't mention "nudists, sluts and perverts," sorry.) It seems that if you want to stay together, it's best to not have any rules except love your spouse as you would yourself.

 

That’s actually contrary to most other polls. So, I’d query the Barna poll as accurate.

I’ll have to look for the link but in a survey conducted recently, evangelicals actually were the happiest in their marriages.

 

Esther Perel has some interesting things to say on stuff like that too.

 

Either way, there are happy and unhappy marriages in all walks.

 

Love your spouse as you would yourself is probably the best rule you could ever apply.

[Napoleon 230]

Everyone can assume accurately or inaccurately whatever they want.

 

All of my threesomes or any other of sexual activities I've had has never involved another man. In fact I've never had sex with another man in the same room with me.

[Anon321 522]

My friends know and none of them think it's gay or bi. Although most of my friends have fucked my GF with or without me joining so that could be why.

[Newb_Couple 28]

I can see doing that for sure, but anyone who automatically thinks your gay because you like MFM’s either as the male side of the couple or the Bull are just shallow ditto heads.

[Numex 2,416]

... most of my friends have fucked my GF with or without me..

You are very lucky, there are so many men here asking how they can get their wife to swing. You should ask this woman to marry you, maybe while she's fucking one of your friends, then you'll be off to a great start.

 

My wife didn't start fucking other men until two years into our marriage, then it was her friends at first. May I ask, do you fuck other women? It took almost another year before my wife decided that she wanted other women playing with us too.

[Anon321 522]

You are very lucky, there are so many men here asking how they can get their wife to swing. You should ask this woman to marry you, maybe while she's fucking one of your friends, then you'll be off to a great start.

 

My wife didn't start fucking other men until two years into our marriage, then it was her friends at first. May I ask, do you fuck other women? It took almost another year before my wife decided that she wanted other women playing with us too.

 

I do fuck other women and we occasionally have FMF threesomes but it is rare. She clearly prefers 2 guys and the chemistry with 2 or more guys is always better for her. She fucks a lot more guys than I do women. When I first met her I think we were both on the same page sexually but she has surpassed me in becoming more sexually adventurous and kinky. She has a very intense submission fetish which she gets to enjoy with other guys. I think she is also developing an exhibitionist fetish as well. While I enjoy watching her have rough sex with other guys, I have no interest in slapping, spitting, gagging, verbally abusing, choking, etc. her while we have sex. I admit it's hot to see her getting treated that way because I know she and the guys are really enjoying it, but it's one of those things I just don't enjoy doing in my sex life. I do occasionally enjoy having sex in public places with her but even then she is much more of a risk taker than me. She doesn't mind guys taking pics and vids of her and I am 100% not down with people taking pics and vids of me, so I am much more discreet than she is.

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

I do fuck other women and we occasionally have FMF threesomes but it is rare. She clearly prefers 2 guys and the chemistry with 2 or more guys is always better for her. She fucks a lot more guys than I do women. When I first met her I think we were both on the same page sexually but she has surpassed me in becoming more sexually adventurous and kinky. She has a very intense submission fetish which she gets to enjoy with other guys. I think she is also developing an exhibitionist fetish as well. While I enjoy watching her have rough sex with other guys, I have no interest in slapping, spitting, gagging, verbally abusing, choking, etc. her while we have sex. I admit it's hot to see her getting treated that way because I know she and the guys are really enjoying it, but it's one of those things I just don't enjoy doing in my sex life. I do occasionally enjoy having sex in public places with her but even then she is much more of a risk taker than me. She doesn't mind guys taking pics and vids of her and I am 100% not down with people taking pics and vids of me, so I am much more discreet than she is.

 

It's very, very cool that you respect your differences with her and are fine with her getting to enjoy these things with other men with your acceptance. To me, this is one of the great things about swinging; you get to explore sexual aspects of yourself that your own partner might be into as much. Done in a supporting way, this can bring a marriage so much closer.

[Newb_Couple 28]

Right on!

[Wencic 0]

Sooo, I have one story related to MFM ... I used to have a girlfriend who always liked to try new things in bed (CONSTANTLY). To be honest, this is very annoying, over time there comes a moment when you want something ordinary, but unfortunately she did not understand this. Somehow her friend from work advised her to try MFM (I'm very grateful to her, to be honest). At the beginning, I did not want to agree, but she persuaded me. After the first time, I really liked it and then it happened a few more times ... Over time, MFM turned into MM. Yes, I became gay. Now we are collecting documents from this list https://daenemarkheiraten.de/dokumente/ to go to denmark and get married with my boyfriend. We are still friends with my ex-girlfriend, we even have sex sometimes, but she doesn’t like that not only her being fucked

[Numex 2,416]

On 10/11/2019 at 10:20 AM, Anon321 said:

She fucks a lot more guys than I do women.

My wife not only fucks more guys than I do women (although I wouldn't say a lot more), she also fucks more women than I do.  She's into FFM with other couples.  Women are just capable of having and enjoying more sex than men, and more likely to be bi.

[Anon321 522]

4 hours ago, Numex said:

My wife not only fucks more guys than I do women (although I wouldn't say a lot more), she also fucks more women than I do.  She's into FFM with other couples.  Women are just capable of having and enjoying more sex than men, and more likely to be bi.

They can definitely take more sex.  And the more sex my GF has the more she wants.

[NerdsAreFun 226]

On 7/29/2019 at 10:16 AM, Newb_Couple said:

Stepping back to observe for a moment is fine, I get that. But the whole cuckold thing just isn’t my bag, it’s very specific.

If your wife has sex with anyone else, regardless of situation, you're a cuckold by definition.  That whole humiliation aspect is a separate add-on fetish played up in porn.

[Anon321 522]

1 hour ago, NerdsAreFun said:

If your wife has sex with anyone else, regardless of situation, you're a cuckold by definition.  That whole humiliation aspect is a separate add-on fetish played up in porn.

It's all semantics.  I believe it was originally supposed to be a man who had an unfaithful wife.  But who is the decide what unfaithful is?  The whole wife watching and/or humiliation thing is a fetish that uses the term cuckold but is it really?  I guess it depends on your definition.

[Numex 2,416]

7 hours ago, Anon321 said:

the more sex my GF has the more she wants.

That's my experience as well.  Since we've been playing, my wife and I have more and better sex between ourselves. 

[PeterJ 948]

3 hours ago, NerdsAreFun said:

If your wife has sex with anyone else, regardless of situation, you're a cuckold by definition.  That whole humiliation aspect is a separate add-on fetish played up in porn.

Historically the term “cuckold” was general parlance for any man whose wife cheated on him. It carries with it an implicit notion of humiliation, because he’s been deceived by his wife who has been having sex with other men without his knowledge (much less his permission.) The term infers that a woman, and her sexual availability, are the property of her husband. Hence, the term “cheating” as a synonym for infidelity — the notion that some thing of value has been unfairly taken. 
 

These notions make little sense in today’s world, where women as well as mean are seen as having sexual agency, but the term does persist.
 

The term “cuckold” is generally used a bit differently in the lifestyle, specificity in the context of “hotwifing”. For several years I played now and then with a couple who operated a “hotwife” website. I got to know a fair amount about that segment of the lifestyle community playing with them and other hotwife couples. My interactions with these couples were nothing more or less than the MFM interactions often described on this board. Within the hotwife community there is a specific subset called “cuckold”, characterized by the husband/BF being degraded and humiliated verbally and sometimes physically (having to tend to the refreshment needs of the wife and the other man, or orally clean up their juices) by the wife and or other man, who is often referred to as a “bull”. I’m disinterested In either of those roles, but for those men who are into it the humiliation is highly gratifying. 
 

So, NerdsAreFun, you may choose in the context of communicating within the lifestyle community to refer to any man who in a three-way permits another man to have sex with his wife as a cuckold, but you will risk others seeing you as lacking broad knowledge of the lifestyle.