Rudeness toward single males

[Napoleon 230]

As a single male a few weeks ago I was referred to a swinger club by a buddy of mine (he's married) who knows the couple who planned the event. It was nice. Most of the couples there were very pleasant to talk to and were interested in me. It was about (give or take) 60 couples, 14 single women, and 3 single males including myself. My personal rule is only getting to know everyone (chatting) a little bit the first time I attend a swinger club for the very first time. Nothing more.

 

A few couples invited me over to their tables and I chatted with them. It was multiple couples per table. Unfortunately while chatting with other couples a good number of them literally rolled their eyes at me and ignored me. Ok. Cool with me. The next time I come to this gathering with my lady friend those same couples that were rude to me approach me and are interested. I ignore them as they did me, even for small talk, and I walked away.

 

I can't tolerate rudeness. Also I was never sexually interested in the women of these couples to begin with. Other than that me and my partner had a great time the remainder of the night. We plan on coming back again.

[Alura 2,775]

I think you have the right idea, Napoleon. Come back with your lady friend.

 

Some couples think of single men (and women) as a person to takes a bus to a meeting of the Porsche Club, planning to drive everybody else's car better than the owner ever could.

[Napoleon 230]

To:Alura

 

Agreed

[cplnuswing 4,713]

There's no reason to be rude just because, but I wonder if the dynamic going on here was as it sounds like the only single male among all couples, that felt a little out of place, and the couples felt the same way and that made everyone a little uncomfortable and awkward with the whole situation. Sometimes feeling awkward can lead to some people trying too hard, and others being standoffish and not trying enough, and that applies to both sides. Maybe a good example would be when someone brings their date to what was supposed to be a girls or boys night out. Once everyone knows each other well and are friends, that can work ok, but at first, it can feel really awkward for everyone involved.

 

The second part of it may be simple - perhaps these particular couples weren't looking to swing with a single male, but there were looking to swing with couples, so, when the OP went from not what they were looking for to what they were looking for, then the interest level shot up.