By
mncurious
My wife recently returned from opening up our marriage for the first time. It was with a man she met on a recent trip overseas. We talked about it and planned her return trip for months. He sent her any documents she requested and had no problem talking to me if I wanted to. We agreed to split the costs for the trip.
We established clear boundaries and communication expectations. They spent an entire week together and used most of the condoms my wife and I bought for the trip. Only once did the condom break but since we use script birth control, we are not concerned as he gave her proof of being std free. She's still concerned and wants to get tested before we have sex bareback again. We still haven't had sex since she returned.
About the experience
This was also my very White wife's first time having sex with a Black man. She's 42, her lover's 47. Let's just say she loved her first time having a Black lover. Her orgasms were beyond intense seeing his BBC slip inside of her. His, too as it was his first interracial relationship, too. He was also much more dominant and assertive during sex with my wife and was able to take her from behind and bring her to climax which is very hard to do. I'm much more chill during sex and like her to take the lead. She's okay but much prefers his style.
The only issue from the trip was that one time the condom came off during sex and they didn't notice until it was too late. My wife's a little nervous and is being tested asap, at least for any stds.
Since she returned, we haven't had time to connect sexually due to jet lag, kids, and work. She said it was a really great liberating experience overall. My wife still keeps in touch with him even though they both agreed it was mainly about sex, not a relationship. There seems to be plenty of NRE.
What is the reality from the group here when a married White wife not only has her first swinging experience but with a Black man for the first time, too. So many firsts!
Should I be concerned about anything or is this natural and normal for my wife to want him again so quickly after her first time opening up our marriage? Or is it also being with a Black man who by her own words was so amazing and incredible? Or is it just NRE with her new lover? They definitely have some emotional attachment after being together for an entire week 24/7. Lots of sex, kissing,and travel together. From what she said, their mutual attraction has little to do with race and more to do with just a visceral physical and emotional connection.
We agreed not to share social media messages or emails between my wife and her lover unless she wants to. We also talked about swinging once she returned but she has already talked about going back to see him in Europe next year. They still keep in touch and talk after the trip.
Does this sound like a poly relationship developing or just NRE from the long swinging adventure?
Thanks for the advice and please reply on or offline.
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