C&C17 17 Posted June 24, 2017 So we've decided to investigate and see if the lifestyle is for us. First, appreciate all the advice we've read in the forums so far from the more experienced. Question is this, regarding couples we meet for play. Do you, as couples with more experience, keep several couples you click with in a sort of rotation? Is that acceptable, or are repeat play sessions considered a bad idea at the risk of developing problems within the foursome?? Thanks for advice, and hope we don't look too amateur lol. 'Cause we are. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post
JandKinBoise 858 Posted June 25, 2017 Welcome! I hope you enjoy your time here and learn a lot. When we had a group of guys we would see, we would keep a schedule of sorts. The goal was to keep the meetings rare enough to keep the excitement level up. Once you start seeing the same person or couple over and over, the excitement will start to wane. Also, keeping the intimate times limited, also lessened the number of guys falling in love with my wife. It seems the common goal for a lot of new swingers is to find a couple that can be friends and have them as exclusive swing friends. This system is good for mental health as well as physical health. It's all about what makes you and your companions comfortable. Quote Share this post Link to post
M1F2KTJ 473 Posted June 25, 2017 A connection with one couple or person can be hard to transfer to another couple or person if you are thinking about bringing like minded people together. What was fun with him/her/them in an intimate setting might not be as fun in a group/party thing. Quote Share this post Link to post
adamgunn 1,460 Posted June 25, 2017 A great question, C&C There's no set answer, other than do what you like. Talk to each other, and if either starts feeling uncomfortable, stop. A schedule of couples or singles never worked for us, because you have a hard time controlling how busy you get with other things and the availability of the other person or couple. So, if we wanted to play, we found someone. Yes, we had our favorites, and if one of them said "Can you?" our default position was, 'how can we make this happen.' Good luck. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post
Alura 2,774 Posted June 25, 2017 We played with couples most of the time. Usually for extended (years, even) periods of time. Positive aspects: "Hey, Linda! The kids will be visiting Grandma this weekend. Can you and Ronnie come over and play?" Negative aspects: (In the car on the way home.) "How was the sex with Pat this evening, Sweetheart?" "Just like ol' married folks, Darling." Quote Share this post Link to post
SW_PA_Couple 4,024 Posted June 26, 2017 . . . Do you, as couples with more experience, keep several couples you click with in a sort of rotation? It is not rotational: it is spontaneous. We will say to each other, "hey, what do you think K and H are doing this weekend?" So we give them a call to see. If they cannot make it, we maybe make a different plan. We maybe decide it is going to be a "vanilla" weekend. We have our favorites but we work hard at making every couple we know believe that "they" are our favorites. 3 Quote Share this post Link to post
asncpl 729 Posted June 26, 2017 I think it's important to keep in mind that it's very much a two-way street. While we always like to have swinger friends that we can call up and play, that's not what all swingers want. Some prefer a one-time experience, because after all it's about having sex with different folks. Some may want to keep your number if you hit off for special trips to resorts or cruises. A rotation, after going around a few times, will begin to feel stale,, but I personally like to have swinger friends, regardless of whether it's for some spontaneous play or just chatting about the lifestyle while doing vanilla things. It ultimately depends on what you want out of the lifestyle. 3 Quote Share this post Link to post
GoldCoCouple 4,065 Posted June 26, 2017 Generally it seems like FWB couples will either have one or more couples in a 'rotation' while other couples are 'one and done'. It all depends on what you are looking for and want. There is no 'right' way, there is only 'your' way meaning whatever you both decide to do. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post