Words of encouragement

[Letsgetiton365 16]

The wife and i are still new to the whole lifestyle. We have only been with one couple but we've played 4 times.

 

After the second time we decided we would full swap if it came to that, well it did and the other guy couldn't get it up. So we stopped. If one doesn't play neither will play. Again on the fourth time he still couldn't get it up. So again everything came to a halt.

 

My wife is worried its her and I keep trying to reassure her it is not. I would like some people that have been at this for a while to give her some encouragement. Also I've let her know that my cock is hers and in any situation she can have it. Other than that we have been enjoying our selves and our new adventures.

 

Thanks,

[Chris&Suzanne 204]

It happens sometimes.

 

there are other ways to have sex.

 

Penetration does not have to be the goal.

[EastInWest 1,524]

Is the other couple experienced at this?

 

Whatever the road block is, it's not her. It's not at all abnormal, in our culture, to have a hard time getting it up to have sex with someone else's wife while he's watching.

[Letsgetiton365 16]

Thanks for the replies. Yes I believe they have been with several other couples.

[adamgunn 1,460]

It is NOT her! Don't know what this guy's problem is, but there's a menu you can pick from. Alcohol, she's too pretty, she's not his type but he wants to try anyway, etc. etc.

 

Try other couples / men, you'll score eventually.

 

Good luck.

[SJBluebirds 195]

We're not the Original Post writer/couple -- but thanks for the encouragement, everyone. We seem to be in the same boat as them.

 

Whew! At least it's not 'just us'!

[njbm 2,880]

It can be from nerves, tiredness or the dang thing doesn't work. I am a missionary for ED medication. I use Cialis. It may be psychological, but it helps.

 

We play with a couple of couples who switch to blindfolds, sensual and sexual message, etc. Fun with less pressure.

[njbm 2,880]

PS, I've had erectile problems with women who I found very sexy and attractive. That's not it.

[njbm 2,880]

Memo to men: do not drink alcoholic beverages if you want to play.

[M1F2KTJ 473]

It's happened to me before. It's frustrating and embarrassing. For me it has never been the woman's fault. I'm horny for women of all shapes,sizes, looks and colors. It is usually nerves. The apprehension about giving a good performance.

[Letsgetiton365 16]

Thank you again for all the replies. I've been showing them to her. she is more at ease and believes it isn't her.

[SimplyUs 28]

Unfortunately it happens. It's happened to me as well. It's not her by any means. When it happened to me, I assured the gentleman that he would have fun regardless. Asked him how I could make him relax and kept it light. In no time, it wasn't a problem anymore. It's a psychological issue more than anything. I am sure that has been said already. Sometimes our bodies just don't behave the way we'd like them to. Don't let it worry you sugar. I know, so much easier said than done.

[Travelcpl 20]

It happens more than you'd think. As noted above, alcohol is one of the usual suspects. And it's not easily remedied with a Red Bull. One guy we were with had problems so we offered him a viagra which Mr. Travel got as a retirement present. Didn't do a thing. We later found out when we checked the blister pack he'd taken two of them and still nothing! So don't take it personally at all.

[BuiltForSin 66]

This has happened to me twice. The first time was at our third Party. The first two parties were fun and we fooled around but did not go farther than that. The third party my wife grabbed my hand and ran into the orgy room. The male/female ratio was about even but within a couple of minutes three of the guys left and it was two guys. I laid down on the bed and had three women working me, all very pretty.. and NOTHING. I've never had an issue getting hard its always just happened. I excused myself to go to the bathroom and just starred at myself in the mirror having no idea what to do and had a small freak out. I went back out and tried again but no luck.

 

The second time was at club Privata. This was our first encounter since the incident above and it was playing on my mind.. This was a straight swap and the woman was a little uptight that I was not ready to go form the start and honestly so was I...

 

I took some time off after that. Since getting active again it has not happened. When we go out my wife and I will play a little bit (just your basic heavy breathing and rubbing/dry humping stuff) that usually gets be going for a few minutes and once it has gone up for the night it seems to return much more easily after that if we do bump funnies with a new couple. The hard part is you have to not stress and try to live in the moment without trying not to stress and living in the moment.

 

So yeah probably not her - but the first incidence may be the reason for the second.