Racial Diversity in the Lifestyle

[TheGentleman 15]

Interesting question Julie. I am a black man and I have limited swing club experience. I find that white people are more open about this issue than black. Also black people stereotypically dont seek sexual pleasure at swing clubs .. This alternative lifestyle is not frequent in black culture. Why ? I would assume because the integration of our society is still not as open and exposure to the lifestyle and people is limited to mostly whites and blacks who more integrated into the general society .. either in education, work, or neighborhood enviroments ... To let your sexual desires out is freedom in a sense ... Interesting question !

[oddcouple2841 16]

This is K (the male)

 

With myself it is more a matter of attraction. Preference in pornography may be a good indicator. I find that I am attracted to Caucassion, Black, Asian, American Indian and some Hispanics. I find that I have little to no attraction to East Indian, Middle Eastern or dark haired latins.

 

I do not consider myself racist but I do believe we each have some predjudice in all of us. This being said I think most persons tend to gravitate to their own "safety level" or situations where they feel at least somewhat comfortable. I myself would not want to venture off immediatly with a couple of a different race because I would too far beyond my comfort level at this point. In the future though I see where it could be a definate possibility.

[Mrs.PaganLovers 15]

Humans are humans, color is only skin deep. We are all alike, there are cultural differences. I happen to have been lucky enough to experience a wide range of different cultures.

 

I do have certain things that I am attracted to but that is a whole different topic, in my humble opinion.

 

Blessings

Mrs. PL

[mr&mrsbees 15]

We are Asians-Caucasian. People usually stereotype us until they talk to us We are well traveled (due to work/educations/vacations) couple and have seen and received many reactions from people, so we adapt and adept to cultures and behaviors whenever we have to. Most of the time we get a very good treatment

 

M & Mrs Bees

[eatscherry 15]

Hhhmmmm... I go out with girls of all types . One of my girlfriends likes SLAYER and AFI and the other likes 2LIVE CREW so you can guess what they look like . But I have found that the choices people make is basesd on race , sometimes . But some people try to force it and others vailidate being racist every chance they get and for any reason . And me being black does make things harder dating defferent people .

[stu 25]

It's a question of being on the same wave length...of liking or disliking...culture has not much to do with it.......its a different matter that one might gel better with some one of their own culture...but then on the other hand...some one from another culture...'intriguing'...I should think .

[richdon03 31]

We are an inter-racial couple (Black Male, Caucasian female) in New England. Like the population, most clubs are predominantly white. However, we constantly receive invitations to all sorts of clubs and parties and have witnessed very little discrimination, per se. What we find interesting is that there are relatively few African American Couples actively participating in the lifestyle. I believe it was TheGentleman who mentioned that alternative lifestyles are not generally practiced in the black community. This is largely correct. African Americans tend to be exceptionally conservative about most sexual issues, at least publicly. Someone mentioned surveys regarding oral sex practices, for example. They also tend to be more homophobic as a group than most cultures. Finally, prejudice is not a trait posessed by solely caucasians. There is a very large part of the African American community that would never consider getting sexually involved with caucasians.

 

That being said, your fantasy is your fantasy. If you don't want to have sex with a black person, that's your choice. We're just thrilled that the swinging community in our area is as welcoming as it is. If Rich approaches a white woman who isn't attracted to black men (as rare as that is), he just moves on to the next one. Black men are in demand in these parts. As for Donna, white men are a special treat. We're glad we're in New England. Rich is from the south (Texas). There are still people in those parts that believe it is a sin to mix the races. Swinging and race-mixing may be more of a risk than they are willing to take.

[conley&caramel 15]

We are in Southeast Michigan, and feel we have been faced with racial prejudice in many swinger clubs. We don't let it bother us,we enjoy ourselves and always stay open minded. By the way,we are a happily married blk cpl. We have been to only been to one club that made us feel uncomfortable. Needless to say we have not returned. We are opened to any race, we are much more deeper than skin color. Thank you for this topic,it helps us to have a better understanding of what we are dealing with in this lifestyle. G & J

[goldengirl 15]

Let me start off by saying that I'm a biracial (black & white) and growing up my step-father was Persian (from Iran) and grew up as a non-mormon in UT..And what I've learned is that people aren't really different they just have different life expierinces,as we all do. But I must say that to some degree the fact that people seriously ask themselves wether or not they'd be with another person based on race(blacke,white,hispanic etc...) completly rediculous. I've had friends of many different cultural/racial backgrounds tell me they wouldn't date a certain race (there's no such thing as reverse rascism in my book only rascism) and I put them in check for it.

 

I also find just as offensive when I've had friends or others tell me they want to be with me or someone else based solely on there race for exsample peolpe who say they have "Asain Fever" or date black men" because they all have hudge cocks" or that "white women are sluts"(I personally find it a HUGE turn off ). Both points of view are to me, dehumanizing because either way your not dealing with a person your only choosing to deal with a part of them that they had no control in creating.For every stereotype there is sout there, there is someone that can disprove it. Now if you find someones skin tone or there hair or eyes etc.. attractive , that's great! But when you limit yourself to the types of people you have in your life based only on race then you limit your growth as a human being . That being said I wish you all luck in finding what your looking for and luck in challeging any beliefs that you may have that limits your ability to expierence yourself as a sexual being and a human being.Namaste'

[wifes_sex_slave 16]

The club we attend outside Toronto is primarily caucasion - don't ask why because there are so many different races in the area - there is no excuse.

 

My skin colour is white, but I am a Heinz 57. My family background is English, Irish, German, French, Dutch and my great grandmother was black. I have married an Hispanic woman so our children have that as well.

 

I see absolutely no reason to believe that anyone who wants to have sex with so many people in this lifestyle would be prejudice just because the colour of the skin is different from their own.

 

I just read the post from awhile ago RE: DARK ROOM and there were so many people who responded "Yeah, let's go". Now think about it this way, "IF" perchance you were involved in this "dark room" orgy and everyone was having a fun sucking, f*cking, feeling, tasting and a good time was had by all - when the lights were turned on - would you then be upset to find the room was full of several races mixed and mingled with your own juices?

 

I want to have a good time with people who are interesting, funny, erotic, etc... I don't care what colour they are.

 

Hey, if James T. Kirk can do a green girl - so can I! facelick

[The_Phoenyxes 15]

Mr. Bird and i are an inter-racial couple (white male and 1/2 black 1/2 white female). We dont rule anyone out because of race. As long as they have a good personality then we are good. Just think about how many good experiences that could get away from you if you put up barieers like that!

[naturalwoman 15]

I am in an interracial relationship, I am white my partner is black. We actually started hosting our own swinger parties after we found our experiences at the clubs to be very uncomfortable. Our parties consist of black and interracial couples which many have also have experienced uncomfortable situations at clubs. We are now going on our 10th year of hosting such parties. Our parties are open to all couples and single females and select single males, but we find most white couples decline the invitations. I don't know the reasoning behind this maybe it goes back to the old saying "birds of a feather flock together" but I definately would like to see more diversity in the swinger lifestyle and perhaps a little more understanding of interracial couples in the lifestyle. Nothing is worse than walking into a club to have my partner approached over and over to fullfill a BBC fantasy or me approached by black men only because the assumption is made when I walk into the door with my black partner that I am only interested in black men. We are there for the same reasons as everyone else..... To enhance our already incredible relationship, to fullfill or revisit a few fantasies and in return hope to fullfill others fantasies, to meet new people and to enjoy the company of likeminded individuals whatever their race may be.

 

As far as black couples not being as open and into the lifestyle I completely disagree!!!! At our last party here in Chicago 48 black couples were in attendence as well as 18 single black females, 20 single black males and a handful of other females (white, hispanic and asian) It's the environment not the lifestyle.

[joe22 15]

Had our first black experience at the Edgewater in Oakland and wife enjoyed it very much. A number of people watched us in a three some.

[bnlee2 15]

we are in our early fifties and newbies at this. we are an asian couple and did notice we are the only asian couple or one of two asian couples at the party. are there other asian couples in this lifestyle. would love to meet others in our age group. we are both hwp and fit, well educated and travelled. would love to find other couples like us as friends and take it from there.

[peabody 7]

We also are an interracial couple. I am white and my wife is Chinese. It is a bit of a strange combination for swingers and you would expect an Asian female to be very conservative. But not my wife. She loves sex and is almost an artist when it comes to lovemaking with others.

[Marinho 16]

I'm curious as to what people's thoughts are on mixing races within the lifestyle. So I post a poll.....

 

(you can select as many of the above responses as apply to you).

 

Feel free to post your thoughts on racial diversity within swinging as well as any experiences you have had in this regard.

 

 

I have no problem swinging with any race, as a matter of fact I'm kind of partial of doing it with black ladies as they seem to be the most inhabited and all of the ones that I've been with will take it anally. Red heads seem to be the horniest and orientals have the biggest nipples I've ever seen.

 

Marinho

[magnum 78]

I'm curious as to what people's thoughts are on mixing races within the lifestyle. So I post a poll.....

 

(you can select as many of the above responses as apply to you).

 

Feel free to post your thoughts on racial diversity within swinging as well as any experiences you have had in this regard.

 

 

In general, I prefer divesity in swinging and in life...

[sweettn 24]

We have no problem mixing it up. It's very erotic! We suggest that every couple should try swinging outside their own race.

[couple_4bi 15]

My wife has been with a black male (not swinging) and I have been with 2 caucasian girls in my life. Our community is primarily hispanic so we tend to just relate to our own. Definately wouldnt mind switching it up though.

[jennifer_w_dfw 17]

Color is just that, color.

 

Connections can be made on all levels, race, age, sex. You just never know until you open your mind.

[Pioneer Swinger 16]

We have no problem mixing it up. It's very erotic! We suggest that every couple should try swinging outside their own race.

 

Amen! While my wife's second partner was black, the third man to penetrate her was white. After that, Angie has gone on to be penetrated (always bare) by men of just about every race on Earth. Three months after she started swinging, Angie suggested that we get back together -On the condition that she could continue to swing. She also suggested that I try interracial swinging as well. And, I have to say that she is right! Maybe it'd revelling against the taboos so many of us were brought up with. But, the color contrasts of interracial intercourse can't be beat! And, it's nothing newm either: Angie started IR swapping in 1978 with me following in 1979.

[SCcpl40 74]

We enjoy couples, age or race is not a factor to us.

[luvscum 17]

I'm curious as to what people's thoughts are on mixing races within the lifestyle. So I post a poll.....

 

(you can select as many of the above responses as apply to you).

 

Feel free to post your thoughts on racial diversity within swinging as well as any experiences you have had in this regard.

 

Hello Group

Over the years We have been to many Swing Clubs. Has been many with mostly Black Men and or couples. My husband left men in the group rooms at many parties. I have had some of the best times sexually with lots of black men. we now because of those experiences sexx many black men as sex partners,in all aspects.I love sucking and them and being fucked by the (including anal)

[M1F2KTJ 473]

I voted that we are willing to swing with any race. I don't know what the big deal is. We consider personality first. ( I was going to leave it at that but as I thought more ...) ... Assholes come in all colors, big dicks and little dicks come in all colors.

[polo_10 15]

We live in the surburban Detroit area... and started swinging 4 yrs ago and came to find out quickly that there is a line drawn when it comes to Diversity...in our are there are several majority white clubs and we were fine with that our sponsors were White/Male and his wife was from Panama..but after several visits we always left the club feeling unwanted as if we were a plague..Now far as attraction goes my wife is mixed and model and myself a clean cut physically fit Black male. Our biggest complaint has been the stand-offish that seems to come because of our race and yes we have reached out plenty of times. Then we explored clubs in the urban city (Majority Black) and found that we were Welcome, but their membership consist of body shapes that were unattractive to us (with the exception of a few)..So I reasoned that race plays a part as much as what's attractive to you as a couple.

[landr2b 16]

After reading through most of the other post here, we'd agree that we first look for personnality rather than color. There has to be chemistry with everyone no matter their color.

[Guest Slicdic4u]

We don't feel race is an issue! we have been with Blacks, Native American, Asian, Hispanic, & a couple from Vietnam. So what's the issue here?? Sex or Color????

[SecretAsianMan 348]

I've never thought of "race" as being much of an issue for me ... however, I've noticed that in my particular area (Southern California) MOST of the swingers I've encountered area are white, with a fair representation of blacks & hispanics/latin-americans as well.

 

There are very few other asians that I've encountered (and even fewer asian males) - so that I'm actually a bit of a unique person in most of the groups I've interacted with.

 

There was one time, quite recently that I ran into a couple whom I had met at a party about four or five years ago - they remembered me quite clearly and called me by name. I had no clue who they were (of course, the fact that they were both now about 100+ lbs less than when I first met them probably didn't help me any)

[jgal 15]

Personality is the big thing for us. We need to click as people first and then we can be more than friends! race and age are nothing to us

[lardub 170]

With us it isn't race but attitude and well body image, we are both turned on by certain bodies and not so by others regardless of ethnic back ground. Their has to be a chemical mixture there or play doesn't happen. It all comes down to attitude and desire, if they have a bad attitude we have no desire.

[Tina and Bob 236]

Swinging experience has opened up a more open and less opinionated view on cultural or race driven differences amongst us all. I had only been with caucasian men before swinging. Bob encouraged me to diversify not only in my sexual freedom, but in the races I play with. I have now played with many African American men and some Hispanic men and women and one of my regular single male friends is African American. We are fortunate that we live in a culturally/racially diverse area of the country where being with a black man in public is not out of the norm.

[Numex 2,379]

Greg & Sheryl said:

Conversely, it seems like many black women don’t even want to perform oral sex. Greg attended a historically black college in the 1980’s and couldn’t even buy a blowjob from many of the coeds there! These results from a study at the University of Arkansas seem to confirm this aversion:

 

Frequency of Oral-genital Stimulation:

1. 75% of white women report performing oral sex; 78% of white women report receiving oral sex.

2. 34% of black women report performing oral sex; 49% of black women report receiving oral sex.

That surprises me. I'm a white guy and the best bj's I have ever gotten were from the two black women I dated years apart. Most white women give a little unenthusiastic oral as forepaly but then stop. The black women knew what they were doing and keep doing it until I would cum if that's what I wanted. And they would swallow, the only white woman that did that for me is my wife. They were also happy to get licked, in addition to and not instead of fucking. No one in this ever suggested anal, so I can't say about that. So I found it quite good, I hope they remember me with good memories too.

[yourluvrman 28]

Thank goodness for diversity.

[sunbuckus 3,567]

I didn't read all of the comments on this thread but I will say that I am always surprised when I'm reminded that there is still racism...especially hardcore racism. I can understand having a preference but actually avoiding persons who have had sexual encounters with a specific race is mind-blowing. It just goes to show you that even in a group of people who are sexually open-minded, there are still places in the mind that are closed to other ideas.

[yourluvrman 28]

sunbuckus said:

I didn't read all of the comments on this thread but I will say that I am always surprised when I'm reminded that there is still racism...especially hardcore racism. I can understand having a preference but actually avoiding persons who have had sexual encounters with a specific race is mind-blowing. It just goes to show you that even in a group of people who are sexually open-minded, there are still places in the mind that are closed to other ideas.

 

Oh, I'm not surprised. Ignorance knows no bounds. LOL

[sunbuckus 3,567]

yourluvrman said:

Oh, I'm not surprised. Ignorance knows no bounds. LOL

 

I think it's more of a surprise for me because I just forget about how un-accepting people can be. We recently went out on a date and just walked around a busy plaza before seeing a movie. A young boy called out some negatory sounds due to our race and I was taken aback at the vulgarity, lack of respect to elders, and general attitude in someone so young in age. Of course, it reminded me of my own experiences with fellow schoolmates when I was little...so I shouldn't have been rattled. Just amazed at how little things have changed since then considering how far we've come since the 1960s...yet so much more to go.

[slevin 1,374]

A young boy called out some negatory sounds due to our race and I was taken aback at the vuglarity, lack of respect to elders, and general attitude in someone so young in age. Of course, it reminded me of my own experiences with fellow schoolmates when I was little...so I shouldn't have been rattled. Just amazed at how little things have changed since then considering how far we've come since the 1960s...yet so much more to go.

 

This is one reason I love Toronto. There are so many cultures here it's hard to imagine anyone being able to grow up racist. I am sure they exist, but I don't ever remember encountering an obvious case like what happened to you. If you walk down the street in the city you won't see an overwhelming population of any particular race or culture; the population is so diverse. There are some exceptions of course; Chinatown, little Italy etc., but on an average street the diversity is very apparent. Very cool

[sunbuckus 3,567]

This is one reason I love Toronto. There are so many cultures here it's hard to imagine anyone being able to grow up racist. I am sure they exist, but I don't ever remember encountering an obvious case like what happened to you. If you walk down the street in the city you won't see an overwhelming population of any particular race or culture; the population is so diverse. There are some exceptions of course; Chinatown, little Italy etc., but on an average street the diversity is very apparent. Very cool

 

Trying to get us to move to Toronto? :P

 

I often do not remember that we look different from the majority of the population here until someone points out otherwise.

[Philandscarlett 15]

We live by the philosophy of 'don't sleep with mean people' which can be pretty broad brush to paint with, but most certainly doesn't discriminate based on skin colour

 

But if your skin colour comes with cultural/religious baggage that doesn't involve complete respect and equality for women (as well as the LGBT community) we still count that as being mean, this is the 21st century and we can't let these bronze-age attitudes be encouraged

 

I'm not too sure what I feel on the fetishisation of race, all the talk of 'big black men' across the internet sometimes seems a little odd, like they are not viewed as human, but as a beast like stallion brought in for casual sex...but I suppose my own fetish for pale Redheads, Russian accented and Japanese/Korean girls isn't really any different, I just try and word things a little more politically correct lol

[NHswingSet 38]

I appreciate any race! As long as there is good hygiene and mutual attraction.

[BeStylnIT 114]

The is little diversity in the lifestyle. All you have are white couples, who are into black guys or black couples into white girls....bout it

[Longshanks 15]

That's what my wife said. Black men hit on her all of the time, so agreed that perhaps it's time to meet a black couple so she can have that experience. I think she finds it very intriguing. I'm all for it and I'll have the opportunity to fuck a sexy black woman. I find it very arousing. Ever since she brought it up out of the blue when we were discussing exploring threesomes and having sex with other couples I can't get it out of my head. She's a small girl 5-4 105 lbs so I can only imagine the sight of a big black cock inside her. I think she also wants a black woman. She's mentioned a few times over the years.

[Longshanks 15]

My first bi experience was with an Asian dude. It sucked but now I see some Asian guys that I find attractive.

[TandemExplorers 15]

We are a interracial couple in Texas. We enjoy hanging out with all races. Good people are good people. We do find it more comfortable hanging out in a mixed crowd

[LadyBunny 15]

Size matters more then color. I am just saying

[SwingerGirl 132]

I didn't read though all the pages of this thread, but wanted to say.... I am open to all races both men and women. But I am more attracted to black men and white women. Why? I have no clue, it's just my taste I suppose.

 

I live near New Orleans, which according to the 2000 census is 28% white and 67% black. When I first attended a swing club there, it was mostly black couples. Yet, since my second time going and any time thereafter it is mostly white couple and singles. Now, I can't say this is always the norm. I have only been to the clubs a few times, and those visits were several years ago.

[CaptainFantasmo 15]

The first club we went to probably had more black people than white people. I don't care too much or notice, but it seemed like there were only a few white people there. The place we go to now is very diverse. There were plenty of white and black people as well as a few Asian and Hispanic people and quite a few biracial couples. My husband and I are both white, and I don't think we judge attractiveness by skin color.

[Mochacino 188]

In most cities we have been to, the clubs are usually mostly white couples with the occasional single black man thrown in. My husband and I are both black and we typically get one of two reactions. It's either you notice right away the couples who go to the furthest corner of the club so they don't have to speak to us. Or the ones who stampede us at the welcome desk to say hi. We don't care about race at all so it's a major turn-off when someone approaches us and says something completely disgusting or demeaning. My husband and I are not in the lifestyle to fulfill other people's "chocolate fantasies". So comments like "Oh goodie hun one for you and one for me!" are the fastest way to insure we will not be sticking around long enough to find out if we like your personalities. Statements like that tell us all we need to know about you.

[Chicup 41]

In most cities we have been to, the clubs are usually mostly white couples with the occasional single black man thrown in. My husband and I are both black and we typically get one of two reactions. It's either you notice right away the couples who go to the furthest corner of the club so they don't have to speak to us. Or the ones who stampede us at the welcome desk to say hi. We don't care about race at all so it's a major turn-off when someone approaches us and says something completely disgusting or demeaning. My husband and I are not in the lifestyle to fulfill other people's "chocolate fantasies". So comments like "Oh goodie hun one for you and one for me!" are the fastest way to insure we will not be sticking around long enough to find out if we like your personalities. Statements like that tell us all we need to know about you.

 

This is what bugs me with the whole "black" fetish people. I feel for couples like you who just want to play and don't want to be someones "black couple".

[sunbuckus 3,567]

In most cities we have been to, the clubs are usually mostly white couples with the occasional single black man thrown in. My husband and I are both black and we typically get one of two reactions. It's either you notice right away the couples who go to the furthest corner of the club so they don't have to speak to us. Or the ones who stampede us at the welcome desk to say hi. We don't care about race at all so it's a major turn-off when someone approaches us and says something completely disgusting or demeaning. My husband and I are not in the lifestyle to fulfill other people's "chocolate fantasies". So comments like "Oh goodie hun one for you and one for me!" are the fastest way to insure we will not be sticking around long enough to find out if we like your personalities. Statements like that tell us all we need to know about you.

 

Thank you for bringing this up. When we go out, the majority of the time, I don't see us as being one of the few Asian couples...I see us as just being a couple. However, on some level we're aware unconsciously that we turn people off because we're Asian and, unfortunately, probably have couples dismiss us because of what society thinks of Asian men. In fact, now that you've said something, I bet there are couples that keep their distance from us because of our race and I haven't even considered that possibility until now!