Lionheart72 2,191 Posted August 6, 2017 Stag and Vixen... I stumbled across this phrase the other day while surfing the steamier parts of the 'net. The definitions I found suggest that, while similar to the cuckold/hotwife dynamic, the "stag" is different from the "cuckold" in that cuckold implies a submissive aspect while stag does not. The stag is a dominant or equal partner who enjoys sharing his wife/partner with other men without being diminished by the act. One posting referenced the ancient custom of cuckolded men being forced to wear antlers as a sign of their shame, and described the stag as "reclaiming the horns" which I though was interesting. As the term rather better describes my own personal kink (and also touches on an interesting pagan religious dimension), I was rather excited to find this. I wondered if anyone else had come across this terminology or knew anything more about it? 4 Quote Share this post Link to post
SW_PA_Couple 4,026 Posted August 6, 2017 . . . I wondered if anyone else had come across this terminology or knew anything more about it?I came across this terminology; about eight years ago. A screen name of a swing Web site's profile almost exactly matches this. I actually met the two of them at a nearby swingers' club. He, presumably the stag, invited me to fuck his womanfriend, whom he referred to only as "Vixen", in front of him. I happily obliged. I am grateful, after all these many years, to learn what the phrase means. I know no more about it. Quote Share this post Link to post
EastInWest 1,524 Posted August 7, 2017 This isn't that far from how we've played so far. Interesting, since cuckold and hotwife were lacking as terms. Quote Share this post Link to post
Guest 2B13RFUN Posted August 7, 2017 Yep, another definition for hotwifing/sharing/loaning/whathaveyou. Sorta tells prospective participants that the couple is not into the humiliation and degradation aspect that has become rife with the "cuckold" term. Sad, because the truth is, most couples we have met fall into the Stag/Vixen catagory; and yet are perceived as "sissy hubby to be abused". Gets quite tiresome to correct a potential play partner that he is NOT in charge of the situation and is only fulfilling a role for the couple. Quote Share this post Link to post
EastInWest 1,524 Posted August 7, 2017 Sad, because the truth is, most couples we have met fall into the Stag/Vixen catagory; and yet are perceived as "sissy hubby to be abused". Gets quite tiresome to correct a potential play partner that he is NOT in charge of the situation and is only fulfilling a role for the couple. There's a subtle difference again from hotwife, where there's no humiliation intended but the female takes the lead. This isn't something I get into much detail about on this forum, but in general, Mrs. E has always been the submissive partner. Having a conservative background, it makes it a little easier for her to open up if I take charge and coach her to where she wants to go. Even if she wants to do something, some anxiety will take over about her upbringing and why she shouldn't. It helps a lot to have me there leading her along so it's not all her idea. I know some people raise their hackles about power dynamics in sex, but this has really turned out well during MFM play, as having both me and her friend's husband leading her keeps her mind busy and it's easier for her to relax. Hotwifing/cuckolding is this whole other scary thing where she has to take charge of it all and that's pretty off the wall for her. 7 Quote Share this post Link to post
Guest 2B13RFUN Posted August 7, 2017 Can absolutely relate to the partner not wanting to "lead the dance", so to speak. It is the slightly misguided or unaware "bulls" I meant that for. We don't do drop of the hat meets, and that's to be sure everyone knows the boundaries,etc. As an example (yes, I prefer not to go in depth either- it tends to encourage the vicarious...lol) one fellow started to think he was going to have anal with the wife (no) and I was going to start doing "clean up" on him (nope). A few more statements in this vein and we had it with him. For some that scenario may be great, it's just not one for us. Quote Share this post Link to post
Aquarius 37 Posted August 7, 2017 Stag and Vixen... I stumbled across this phrase the other day while surfing the steamier parts of the 'net. The definitions I found suggest that, while similar to the cuckold/hotwife dynamic, the "stag" is different from the "cuckold" in that cuckold implies a submissive aspect while stag does not. The stag is a dominant or equal partner who enjoys sharing his wife/partner with other men without being diminished by the act. One posting referenced the ancient custom of cuckolded men being forced to wear antlers as a sign of their shame, and described the stag as "reclaiming the horns" which I though was interesting. As the term rather better describes my own personal kink (and also touches on an interesting pagan religious dimension), I was rather excited to find this. I wondered if anyone else had come across this terminology or knew anything more about it? I love the terminology as this most fits my Kink also ! "Cockold" has never been a part of my Kink but as with Swinging and Hotwifing the wife is in control of the kink and I assume that is part of what turns all us fellas on to what ever our Kinks maybe ... There is nothing more exciting than being married to a sexually liberated women willing to explore the fullness of her sexual self ! 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
asncpl 730 Posted August 9, 2017 Having been involved in a few cuckold fantasy roleplay, I was taught the term "stag" by one of the partners. Just like any play, it tells the guy that the husband is not into humiliation or submissiveness, though he may watch and masturbate or even join in. What I don't really get is the difference between vixen and hotwife. Any insights? 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
Lionheart72 2,191 Posted August 9, 2017 What I don't really get is the difference between vixen and hotwife. Any insights? None here, save perhaps a desire by phrase-coiners to keep with the "forest" theme. Vixen being a female fox, also slang for a clever/wicked/sexual aggressive and attractive woman. Quote Share this post Link to post
Guest 2B13RFUN Posted August 9, 2017 None here, save perhaps a desire by phrase-coiners to keep with the "forest" theme. Vixen being a female fox, also slang for a clever/wicked/sexual aggressive and attractive woman. "...to keep with the forrest theme." Now that's amusing! Funny/sad sort of insight there. Quote Share this post Link to post
JessicaJamison 864 Posted November 23, 2020 On 8/6/2017 at 12:07 PM, Lionheart72 said: Stag and Vixen... I stumbled across this phrase the other day while surfing the steamier parts of the 'net. The definitions I found suggest that, while similar to the cuckold/hotwife dynamic, the "stag" is different from the "cuckold" in that cuckold implies a submissive aspect while stag does not. The stag is a dominant or equal partner who enjoys sharing his wife/partner with other men without being diminished by the act. One posting referenced the ancient custom of cuckolded men being forced to wear antlers as a sign of their shame, and described the stag as "reclaiming the horns" which I though was interesting. As the term rather better describes my own personal kink (and also touches on an interesting pagan religious dimension), I was rather excited to find this. I wondered if anyone else had come across this terminology or knew anything more about it? Stag refers to a husband that is the dominant player she can be with other men only if he approves. Often the stag wants to be the one to pick the partners, the wife has no control over who he picks and what he says they can do. This is not something I'd ever agree too, I pick the men I want to be with as I need chemistry to even get in the right head space for sex, if my husband chose I'd never get laid. I prefer hotwife. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post
shy_couple 460 Posted October 13, 2021 Great topic! We came across this term a few years ago ad feel that it described better than cuckold or hotwife. We both get sexual pleasure from playtime. Not from domination or humiliation (though I love to see Mrs.Shy enjoy lying and pursuing what she wants). We don’t often seek single gents to join but when we do we want a playmate period. So my any profiles (and guys contacting us) these days are pushing a bull/dom type of play which has zero interest. Just a chill person we trust to respect our boundaries. is it too much porn? Guys living in fantasy land? Or playing to a stereotype the assume people are looking for? Quote Share this post Link to post
enhancer 1,586 Posted October 14, 2021 Stag and Vixen is the term we find best describes us and we have been using it on profiles for a while now! I love watching her with other people and joining in however we want me involved at the time. Neither one of us have any interest at all in humiliation or dom sub play. I am a alpha male, in good shape, more then capable in pleasing her in every way and do not have a small penis. Not at all a cuckloid. She is not looking for better or a replacement. Unfortunately it seems most men get their ideas of what joining a couple is about from porn. Any guy that contacts us with a message or a profile that makes it clear they are looking to be a bull for a cuck situation or that they are a dom gets completely ignored or blocked. We find that most men seem to think that is what all couples are looking for. Anyone who disrespects either of us before or during fun time is going to find themselves kicked out the door. Quote Share this post Link to post
Lionheart72 2,191 Posted October 15, 2021 8 hours ago, enhancer said: Anyone who disrespects either of us before or during fun time is going to find themselves kicked out the door. Our old club used to have theme nights... I remember one lady wondering aloud "when is the night for clean, polite, respectful guys?" (Fortunately, at that particular club, that was pretty much called Friday.) I really don't get these people who think being disrespectful is going to get them anywhere. Also, as a total aside, I am amused to see this thread of mine from four years ago back on top. I guess it still resonates. Quote Share this post Link to post
EastInWest 1,524 Posted October 15, 2021 On 10/13/2021 at 1:59 PM, shy_couple said: is it too much porn? Guys living in fantasy land? Or playing to a stereotype the assume people are looking for? My theory is that a lot of guys get a very strong positive reaction to this once or twice, and assume that they've found the way to be "good at this", rather than taking the temperature of each situation individually. Quote Share this post Link to post