What would you change about swinging?

[Guest]

Bit of a strange question but if you could change one thing about the swinging lifestyle what would it be and why?

 

I think my first answer would be that more women would be open to the idea of MFF threesomes.

 

However perhaps a more practical answer would be, I wish single men interested in this lifestyle were better, that they advertised themselves better, that they were more friendly, that they wasn't just totally sex obsessed people who are probably cheating on someone, that they actually tuck the time to get to know a couple, treat them like human beings and not blow up sex dolls, that they actually showed an interest in getting to know you as a couple and not just ramming their penis into your girlfriend or wife, that they didn't just send you rude one line messages, that they didn't just send you close up pictures of their penis, that they actually displayed if they were really single or just cheating like most of them are.

 

If you could change something about the swinging world what would it be and why?

[dan63 106]

Fewer flakes. If you say you are going to meet at a certain place at a certain time, don't be flaking out.

[findinganswers 369]

That people were more honest with their likes and dislikes.

[Guest 2B13RFUN]

Assumptions. The preconceived outlooks held by some nonswingers and swingers alike.

[M1F2KTJ 473]

I'm not trying to be confrontational. I think there may some things to consider.

 

First, but not necessarily in any order:

 

You mentioned cheating twice in your post. I understand that nobody wants to participate in devastating someone's trust in their spouse. We all know how we would feel.

 

Second:

 

You are, I'm assuming, looking online.

I wish single men interested in this lifestyle were better, that they advertised themselves better,

 

There is a world online. Some people are serious and some people are just passing time living in a fantasy. If you are advertising sex than you will meet people only interested in "Wham bam bye bye" They will treat your wife like a whore and barely acknowledge you..

 

that they actually took the time to get to know a couple, treat them like human beings and not blow up sex dolls, that they actually showed an interest in getting to know you as a couple

 

You might try joining groups or clubs unrelated to sex. Hanging out in a bar? That, in my opinion, is the best way to establish a relationship with someone before any thought of a sexual relationship.

 

that they didn't just send you close up pictures of their penis,

 

When I tried using the internet to find a "date" for my wife, she left it up to me to find her "dates", I got an endless barrage of dick pics. I experienced many of the things you said.

 

If you could change something about the swinging world what would it be and why?

 

What I would change are some people/couples having strict rules. The less rules the more spontaneous the better the experience.

 

If you decide to try something like this you will end up meeting some very good and some very disappointing people. Not everyone is going to live up to your fantasy. You might experience a lot of misses until you find that perfect match

 

Good luck!.

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

Just that we are in a place where we are doing this...I'm perfectly fine with that!

 

If I COULD change something, it would not just be for swinging, although it would help with swinging (and it's already been mentioned). It's honesty...if only EVERYONE could feel comfortable with talking honestly to their SO, friends, and family the entire world would be a better place. If women and men could talk honestly, there would probably be more swingers in the world since they wouldn't have to keep wanting to keep this a secret from each other.

[cplnuswing 4,713]

I'd have to say the judgment, both by swingers and especially non-swingers. Why everyone can't just let people be who they are accept them for that without wanting to pass judgment on them, I don't understand. In terms of us swingers particularly, that doesn't mean you have to want to play with everyone out there, but just because they don't swing the exact same way you do doesn't make them any more or less of swinger or a person.

[padoc 1,703]

I'd make Mrs Doc bi…it'd increase MY chances exponentially!!!!

[Norcalswing 24]

Speed dating! How many times have you traveled far, rearranged schedules and spent a ton of money just to meet a couple you've only corresponded online only to be a complete flop? You can make yourself look and sound really cool online.

 

We know within the first two minutes if we are attracted. A few more minutes chatting and we will know, Yay or nay.

 

Always wished someone would host a huge speed dating party. Get to see and talk with potential playmates for 5 or so minutes and move to the next. Keep notes on the potentials and contact according. "Efficient fucking "

[njbm 2,873]

Speed dating! How many times have you traveled far, rearranged schedules and spent a ton of money just to meet a couple you've only corresponded online only to be a complete flop? You can make yourself look and sound really cool online.

 

We know within the first two minutes if we are attracted. A few more minutes chatting and we will know, Yay or nay.

 

That is why we go on the Bliss cruise. Speed dating on a boat. SLS and SDC turn up little for us.

 

Always wished someone would host a huge speed dating party. Get to see and talk with potential playmates for 5 or so minutes and move to the next. Keep notes on the potentials and contact according. "Efficient fucking "

 

That is why we go on the Bliss cruise. Speed dating on a boat.

[Numex 2,420]

That everyone could be open about it without having to worry about your job, the kids school, etc.

[Billygoat 443]

I would like to see it accepted as a life style choice. People will always be as people are. There will be those who are judgmental, bigoted on what they feel should be normal or accepted behavior. There is a freedom in the lifestyle, an acceptance. Everyone is different, likes dislikes etc. but still an over all openness. Our supposed social norms are really....historically....not normal. As one vintage lady swinger told me....”every generation is the same. They each believe they discovered fucking. People have been fucking since the beginning of time and in all variety of ways.” She was 82 and still active nudist and swinger. Great lady.