Single male advice to others

[1XcellentXtra4U 29]

Go to the club... if you're 100% new and the ball isn't rolling yet GO TO THE CLUB. Ok, hope you're getting laid in no time.

[Guest serendipityadam]

what clubs?

[padoc 1,703]

Get a girl, build a relationship, discuss swinging, build trust, THEN go to a swingers club. Assuming that you're both reasonably attractively, reasonably intelligent, non hygienically challenged, personable and H/W/P, you'll have a lot of fun and the male will have something to offer beyond just his penis. Not what you wanted to hear I'm sure but swinging is generally a couples sport. The fantasy of a room full of willing women who just can't wait to get naked with you and give you a warm and wet place to put it is...well, a fantasy! Single males claiming to be swingers are a dime a dozen. It's a buyers market and unless you're truly enlightened and VERY unique you've got a better chance of regular sex hanging out in a vanilla bar.

[1XcellentXtra4U 29]

what clubs?

 

The clubs in your local area.

[1XcellentXtra4U 29]

Single males claiming to be swingers are a dime a dozen. It's a buyers market and unless you're truly enlightened and VERY unique you've got a better chance of regular sex hanging out in a vanilla bar.

You're either putting the buggy before the horse or assuming that I am. I was recommending a simple club visit to get things started for a single male. That's all... Hooking up is chapter 2. Chapter one is for exactly the things you mentioned. I believe that this is better accomplished by showing up in person. That way you can meet people who are more than likely on the same site.

 

That's my advice to a newb single male. Provided you are a reasonable gentleman and you are a mature grown up it's more beneficial to get out and socialize than spend hours using a web site. Because single men are a dime a dozen and most are total nincompoops. When you're in person people will get a better idea of what you are all about.

[Guest serendipityadam]

Get a girl, build a relationship, discuss swinging,build trust, THEN go to a swingers club. Assuming that you're both reasonably attractively, reasonably intelligent, non hygienically challenged, personable and H/W/P, you'll have a lot of fun and the male will have something to offer beyond just his penis. Not what you wanted to hear Im sure but swinging is generally a couples sport. The fantasy of a room full of willing women who just can't wait to get naked with you and give you a warm and wet place to put it is...well, a fantasy! Single males claiming to be swingers are a dime a dozen. It's a buyers market and unless you're truly enlightened and VERY unique you've got a better chance of regular sex hanging out in a vanilla bar.

 

well, very encouraging for a newbie, thanks lol

[padoc 1,703]

I had no intention of being encouraging. Nothing I wrote was inaccurate. The fact is that calling yourself a swinger does not make you one. What differentiates you from millions of other horny single guys looking for NSA sex is that you think that by calling yourself a swinger that you've discovered the mother load of easy sex. Nothing could be further from the truth. Most clubs that are successful strictly limit access to unaccompanied males for very good reason, the demand is far far outstripped by the number single males available. Trust me, you'll get laid more often if you heed my advice.

[1XcellentXtra4U 29]

Not talking about getting laid. I'm talking about familiarizing yourself among the "real swingers". Get the vibe of things and see what it's like actively being part of the scene.

I understand and do not disagree with you. Yes, the single males are highly represented and most turn out to be fakes or a-holes. Not me and in case there's a dude reading this who is also not a douche bag maybe I can help.

 

To counter your point though:

 

Couples have told me many many times that the good single males stick out and are rare. Which makes a good single male something of an asset. Also couples talk about issues with other couples and also meeting the right single gal. So, there's no absolutes and there are always outliers. I think you're just a Debbie downer. A super hot and incredibly sexy Debbie Downer so I ain't mad at ya.

 

Best of luck TO EVERYONE!!!

[JandKinBoise 858]

I'll agree that there is an army of single men, and married men posing as single men, wanting to be in the LS. But the overall quality is so low, that a dedicated, educated and articulate man can do quite well. If a couple is looking for a single guy, they are looking online. It's too difficult to navigate a bar full of potential candidates and the success rate is low. It's very easy to get the attention of a couple with the right ad.

 

I have no idea how a single guy in a club would do but judging by the attitude I have seen here over the years, I'd skip it.

 

It may work for you though, Good luck.

[padoc 1,703]

Of course you're talking about getting laid. "Familiarizing yourself, getting the vibe, see what it's like being part of the scene", is nothing but double speak for getting laid. You're not trying to get involved with swingers because you enjoy witty repartee or white wine and cheese, you want easy and nsa access to willing women. And it's not for intellectual conversations or exchanging recipes, you want sex without effort and at a lot less cost than dating. BTW,we've been in this hobby for 15 years and are not opposed to the occasional extra erection in our playtime. However, our best experiences in that regard have been with males who are part of a swinger couple with the wife's approval. Those men ARE swingers, you are not.

[polymath 17]

This has been an interesting discussion. I am a newbie single guy myself, but I would imagine that this is a sort of eternal argument. Sure there are way too many single guys, but on the other hand, I would expect that at least of the women or couples that show up where there are way too many single guys do so *because* there are a lot of single guys. Interested in reactions of more seasoned folks.

[PeeTWheatstraw 122]

I would agree that getting out and going to events is about the best way for a single man to get started in the lifestyle. You can spend countless hours on sites but if no one knows you or knows what you can do in the bedroom then they will simply pass you over for one of the men that attends events and has shown his skills in the bedroom. In my opinion, SLS is the best site for swingers at the moment. Check their club listings by state and group events listed on HotDates. Believe me, there are a lot of couples into single men.