Snowball! Ball rolling quickly!

[PebblesCanDo 45]

So, it's me again! I'm shy and he's quiet, we are born introverted swingers and are going to attend a house party in December. Anyone want to write me a script? Give me a list, advice, anything? I'm loaded for bear, going no matter what! Freaking out just a bit. We do know a couple there so that helps. Please don't quip "don't be shy!" Believe me after 53 years I'd rather not be!!

 

Thanks!!

Pebbles

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

Put together a swag bag — condoms, lube, bullet (or your toy of choice). Take a smile with you. A smile will win over more playmates than anything else.

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

Challenge yourself to say hi to at least 4-5 other couples. Everyone there is there to meet other couples so saying hi is perfectly acceptable. You can always add other comments to the end of the 'hi'...Is this your first house party? How long have you been doing this? You look great! Come here often? Nice tits! Just about anything you say after the hi will put the ball into their court and usually get them to start talking and you only have to listen. Don't be a wall flower (easier said than done). Everyone is there for the same reason you are, to meet other couples, so just do it. There's almost never a wrong thing to say as an introduction, and if there isn't a connection, you can just say: well it was great meeting you and move on to the next couple. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. While it is hard when you are shy and quiet, just say hi and see where it goes.

 

By the way: Hi!

[TwoFunTexans 103]

You might surprise yourself. In vanilla setting my wife never will initiate talking or make small talk with strangers in hardly any circumstance. However in the ls she's mingling, flirting, sucking dick! Lol I'm about the same but I try harder in the ls to just be extra charming. If you have a hard time starting conversations I would suggest work on your body language to at least look like you're having fun, like not crossing your arms and not smiling etc. Try to move around so you're not standing in the same place.

[Scaredstiff 129]

We had a night out at a club recently, it was a pretty expensive night , about £200 with entry and accommodation etc, so I figured we had to make the effort and talk to people, in the past we would usually just hang around the bar until someone approached us, there were a lot of younger couples at this club and we knew we couldn't just sit back and wait for someone else to do all the work, we approached 5 couples throughout the night, we found that a comment from my wife about the other lady's dress or shoes was usually enough to get the conversation rolling, if they are couples you haven't spoken to before then usually all the usual questions like "how did you start?" , "how long have you been together?" Etc will be enough to fill 10-15 minutes of conversation and that's usually enough to determine if there's any spark.

We didn't feel much of a spark with any of the couples we approached but we still had a good laugh with them and ended up having a great night, it never got awkward or anything, remember that a chat is just a chat, if it starts to become something more then cross that bridge when you come to it, don't go into a conversation worrying that the other couple are on to you and know that you're only after one thing lol, sounds silly but that's how we used to approach conversations and it's hard to focus on small talk when you're looking too far down the line

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

Don't forget to tell us how things went...

[BabeAndApe 70]

This will be hard, but...

 

Plaster a big smile on your face, walk up to the host, stick your hand out and say "Thank you for inviting me. I'm new and I'm terrified, can you point out some nice people who will go easy on me?" You could also pick a warm-open-friendly looking person, introduce yourself when they aren't in the middle of talking to someone else, and say much the same thing. Maybe, "I'm not sure how all of this works. You look very comfortable. Can you give me some advice?" My experience with swingers is that you have a higher statistical likelihood of finding someone who will will take a minute to chat with you, or who might even introduce you to people they know there. Just look for someone who looks like they are in their element.

[PaCouple8585 19]

The easiest way to have a conversation with someone is to have them talk about themselves with what they like to do and then you’ll have things to talk about with them. I’m am not a big talker and that was one of my fears getting into this too since I didn’t want that awkward silence but surprisingly once I started talking to the wife we had a lot to talk about with our similarities. I bet it will be easier than you think it will be.

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

Peacock - wear something that will draw people to you. It doesn't have to be anything elaborate and it needs to be something you still feel comfortable in, but if you can do something to draw people to you so that they make the first move you'll have an easier time and be less likely to try to attach yourself to the one couple you know.

 

How to start conversations:

Hey I love your...... (boobs, outfit, etc)

Hey your ______ is so hot (husband, wife, outfit, ass, etc)

Is this your first party here, too?

This is our first party here and it's a little intimidating (most people will respond favorably to this type of approach, it creates vulnerability and opens doors - and really in the end the goal is to get about as vulnerable as we can - aka. naked).

 

Move around - don't plant yourself too long in one place, especially not alone, it makes you look bored or scared. If you look either of those people are less likely to approach you.

 

Look for other people who look as uncomfortable as you feel and do them (and you) a favor by approaching them. Think of it as doing a good deed.

[PebblesCanDo 45]

OK, the party is Saturday, about 60 people on a large property. We have not been to a house party that was anything more than a mingle, munch and chat, so we bailed. We will also know 2 of the couples at this party so that should help some.

 

SW-PA_Couple: Swag bag – back pack, small suitcase, large purse? Any other items we may need?

GoldCoCouple: Challenge accepted! Hi! Backatcha!

TwoFunTexans: I hope you’re right! We went to a clothing optional resort and I loved it, it had no sexual connotation though, a bit different. Body language, smile & move, Check!

Scared Stiff: a chat is just a chat – have no expectations.

BabeAndApe: Find someone approachable and admit terror! Got it! Ask for a bit of advice from someone who seems to have it down pat.

PaCouple8585: I so hope it’s easier than I think! I hope it’s a piece of cake! Fingers crossed!

JustAskJulie: Outfit wise, I hope it’s a positive review!

 

 

First party intimidation factor admit! Finding the comfort folks, got it. Move and don’t plant myself alone, check!

 

All great advice, I hope my nerves don’t get the best of me, I’m working on that part! There are no dumb questions, right? Let’s see if I can prove that statement wrong!

• My DH seems to think that the group rooms are a free for all (always asking may I of course), but I’m of the opinion that the group room is several subsets within a set – not passing around the candy jar…..is it one pile of intertwined bodies or several small piles ?

• You arrive dressed and at some point find yourself undressed, where do you put your belongings? Afterwards is there etiquette to get cleaned up? Bring a robe?

• I want to get there early so I can get the lay of the land, watch people walk in. He’s says fashionably late.

• I like to stick by my DH because I have a hand that got into it with a table saw and because I’m in a place that I’m unfamiliar with. We play as a couple but have agreed to wander off if the opportunity occurs. So if we do get separated, how do we get back to each other? I know that sounds weird, but I would be uncomfortable interrupting him unless I was asked to join. I’d most likely be uncomfortable trying to find him, and if I’m looking to clean up….(so many variables!)

• You know women, we overthink things! We’ve been with other couples, had a few encounters with a single man (threesome), but that’s basically it, so I don’t have much insight on what to expect.

So, anyone having any more advice please speak up, deadline is quickly approaching!!

[Newcouple17 101]

So sorry, unfortunately having not attended any house parties like this we cannot add anything useful....except maybe a heart felt good luck!

Also we'd be intrigued to know how it goes?

[padoc 1,703]

Your description of a group room happens rarely but when it does….WOW. More likely there will be 3-6 couples, not all of them fully engaged and still a lot of fun to watch/join.

Belongings: Leave valuables (rings, wallet, purse etc) in the car. We bring a small bad with a change of outfit for her and a t-shirt, sweat pants and flip flops for her ride home. We also have a very small "fun bag" with lube and condoms. Ask the host where you can drop the bag.

We always try to be on time….late and you sometimes miss initial interactions and connections.

Unless its a HUGE venue, you'll probably have a general idea where your partner went. Start there. Engage someone to "help" you find him. You may start round II.

Try to stop overthinking. Go with the idea that you're gonna have a blast and then go with the flow.

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

• My DH seems to think that the group rooms are a free for all (always asking may I of course), but I’m of the opinion that the group room is several subsets within a set – not passing around the candy jar…..is it one pile of intertwined bodies or several small piles ��

!

 

They are what the group makes of them. Sometimes it will just be 1-2 couples together with no cross interaction, sometimes it can be a full blown orgy...and sometimes they will be empty. Look before you leap and if you like what you see, then go for it!

 

• You arrive dressed and at some point find yourself undressed, where do you put your belongings? Afterwards is there etiquette to get cleaned up? Bring a robe?

 

Keep the valuables in the car. A bag with spare towels, condoms and toys is never a bad idea (although towels may be provided, but never assume)

 

• I want to get there early so I can get the lay of the land, watch people walk in. He’s says fashionably late.

 

We always strive for punctuality. If it starts at a specific time, then try to arrive at that time. If you want to go early and maybe help with the setup, then contact who is hosting and ask if they would like your assistance (they may not). Arriving late and you may miss finding that perfect connection.

 

• I like to stick by my DH because I have a hand that got into it with a table saw and because I’m in a place that I’m unfamiliar with. We play as a couple but have agreed to wander off if the opportunity occurs. So if we do get separated, how do we get back to each other? I know that sounds weird, but I would be uncomfortable interrupting him unless I was asked to join. I’d most likely be uncomfortable trying to find him, and if I’m looking to clean up….(so many variables!)

 

We almost always stay together because we only play together and we don't like spending time looking for the other one. This also offers 'protection' if someone (usually a man) wants to become too friendly too quickly with the Ms. It makes her more comfortable about the situation so we stay together.

 

• You know women, we overthink things!

 

Yes, and so do you so stop it. Go expecting nothing more than a good time and possibly meeting some new people and anything else is a bonus. Just HAVE FUN! Oh, and don't forget to report back afterwards.

[Scaredstiff 129]

If you're nervous it will probably be best to give yourselves as much time as possible to become comfortable with your surroundings, maybe even get there a little early if you can, my wife likes to be fashionably late and it mostly works against us, most people will already be paired or grouped up and you'll feel like your trying to catch up and therefore not taking the time you need to get comfortable