Minos 16 Posted December 16, 2017 Hi I apologize now if this turns into a bit of a war and peace, its going to be a little bit of an introduction and asking for advice. I've been with my current partner for 8 months now and we have both expressed an interest in swinging. Up until meeting her I'd never really thought about swinging, yes like most men I'd fantasied about threesomes (MFM & FMF) but generally written it off as that just a fantasy. Before we got together we chatted online for about a month before having our first date, which was great as we really got to know each other really well (including our desires & fantasies) so when we met-up there was no awkwardness. Well during this time we talked about everything and she mentioned that she had had a threesome with one of her friends (and friends partner), and had been to a local sex club with someone she was seeing. I think I'm pretty open minded and this intrigued me so I asked for more details, end result was us both saying we would like to go to some clubs together. During other conversations we talking about threesomes, and group sex which led to swinging, all of which we have said we would like to try. Our only rules are "always same room" and "both have to agree on anything before it happens". Since then we have joined a few message boards looking at advice but never really posting anything. We also joined a few dating apps which appear to be geared for swinging, but have never really had much luck. The few times we have been contacted it seemed all they wanted was some photos or a hook-up there and then. We have both said that for us we need there to be a connection with the person/couple for anything to happen (not just a "wham bam thank you madam"). Here is part of the problem, neither of us are what I would call 'Gym-fit' and carry a few extra pounds around the middle but we aren't obese, but because of this we are both a little self conscious of what we look like in photos. The other problem being she works in a school and could be recognized by her face or a couple of her tattoos. Is there anything you can recommend regarding the photos? Is there something we could say/done in our profiles that will help? Is it better to start out going to a club and are certain nights better for newbies? 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
Judy39 145 Posted December 16, 2017 Hello and welcome! Is there anything you can recommend regarding the photos? Profile photo(s) act as a teaser. You don't need to show anything that you're not happy with. For a man, and particularly if that's your style, 'upper floor' type clothes (white shirt, tie, suit or a waistcoat) can look incredibly hot (and forgiving on a few extra pounds). Or you can even have a photo where you only make an eye contact, like this one. For a woman, legs in fishnet, heels, cleavage... Of course you will need photos with faces etc for later correspondence which will have to be more revealing. Here you can try to capture fun times - a nice dinner, being on holiday somewhere nice, sports, concerts etc. Something to prompt a response/conversation. Of course you can start swapping erotic images Is there something we could say/done in our profiles that will help? See above Pictures speak louder than words That's the universal truth. For the text/info bit, it would help to know which website you're on. As an example, fabswingers is rather different to sdc.com Is it better to start out going to a club and are certain nights better for newbies? I prefer clubs, but I have to say that online has worked well for me too. In clubs, couples-only nights are more relaxed, so if you're a bit self conscious then that might work better for you. Try to find a club that is well attended, and/or a specific event that attracts a lot of people - this will give you the best chances to enjoy the night and to see what it's like. Also, there's no better motivation to become gym-fit (or maybe even fit as fuck) than swinging 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
Judy39 145 Posted December 17, 2017 When I said "Of course you can start swapping erotic images" I meant to add there that you don't have to. Not everyone does. It's not an absolute must and you can do it at the time when you feel comfortable to do so, or not at all. Quote Share this post Link to post
Minos 16 Posted December 18, 2017 Hi Judy39 Thanks for the reply. Will look through the photos and see if we can get some new ones taken over Christmas. We do have some on the more erotic but at the moment thats a little bit more for our private collection. We have a profiles on Abfabencounters, Fabswingers, and feeld app. Quote Share this post Link to post
Nicejoey22 15 Posted February 9, 2018 Hope you are having good like in the lifestyle now Quote Share this post Link to post
