What do you say to make the first move at house party?

[PebblesCanDo 45]

This is our 3rd attempt at a house party. Somehow we become oblivious to what the process is at a party until all at once everyone is busy except us! We’ve got a shy/quiet problem, but I swear we are missing a cue or something. Nobody has come up to us to start a conversation (that sounds pathetic), so we don’t know how to ask if someone wants to get naked with us! How do you have that conversation?

Thanks!

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

I had to overcome my reluctance to ask the question. It took time but I finally found a way that fit my personal style. Having already had two or three casual conversation with a prospective playmate, I will pull a hassock or chair up to place where she is already seated and while watching to see if she is receptive to the invitation, ask her if she would like a foot massage. If she says, "oh, I'd like that," and starting the massage I get reactions like, "oh that feels good" I will wait until I get to a point in the conversation when it seems right to ask, "would you like to play."

 

This seems to work for me about one in three times. I have encountered women who do not want their feel touched at all, by anybody. Sometimes I simply perceive no kind of positive reaction at all so I accept the woman's polite, "no thank you".

 

What has never happened to me is for a woman to say, "get lost creep," or "ain't never going to happen." So I moved eventually past that fear.

[padoc 1,703]

Is something precluding you from making the first move? We went to a party not to long ago. Mrs Doc was wearing a dress with a front zipper the length of the dress. As happens, several couples were hanging around in the kitchen. Conversation was friendly but not overtly sexual. The zipper was part way down exposing some cleavage. As we talked with the others, I'd lower the zip a couple of inches and Mrs D would turn to her left or right to talk to people on either. It didn't take long before one of the women had he mouth on her nipple. I moved behind her and lowered the zipper a bit more. I then moved behind the woman who was licking Mrs Doc's boob and started to fondle her. The husband took the hint, finished the zipper and after a few more minutes of for play the four of us and another couple from the kitchen ended up in a bedroom. Sometimes you just have to get the party started!!

[dan63 106]

I call this "closing the deal" and we suck at it too. We are definitely not wall flowers and we are pretty much in the middle of things, and we mingle and mix with different couples/people during the party and even sometimes do some making out. But we (wife and I) suck when it comes to popping the question of, "Would you like to go play?" I think it is really all about a fear of failure.

 

This is not to say that we never get to play, but I really believe we have missed many opportunities because we didn't have the nerve to ask the question. We are working on this. One thing I have definitely learned in the LS is that success builds confidence.

[Fundamental Law 2,885]

But we (wife and I) suck when it comes to popping the question of, "Would you like to go play?" I think it is really all about a fear of failure.

 

Not failure, really. More like rejection. The problem is that failure convolved with rejection begins to feel like abandonment. Of course, it is not. Declining any offer can make the the person offering feel awkward or even bad. This is why social graces matter. "No, thank you." feels different from "no". "What a flattering invitation! We truly appreciate it. However, no thanks." feels a lot different than "no". The grace is to decline the offer while thanking the person.

[adamgunn 1,460]

Analyze the last time you bought a car - that's the way you should proposition people. (No, don't be slimy about it, but the process is the right one.)

 

Don't be afraid to compliment potential partners.

Set up a win-win situation.

Do trial closes.

"Would you like it if I massaged your feet/neck"

"My wife is really into your husband"

"Would you mind if I kissed you"

 

The thing for a salesman not to say is, "So, are you planning on driving out of here with a car today?"

 

Practice, practice, practice.

 

Simply sitting around and hoping nothing will happen means nothing will happen.

[Eddiem 139]

This is our 3rd attempt at a house party. Somehow we become oblivious to what the process is at a party until all at once everyone is busy except us! We’ve got a shy/quiet problem, but I swear we are missing a cue or something. Nobody has come up to us to start a conversation (that sounds pathetic), so we don’t know how to ask if someone wants to get naked with us! How do you have that conversation?

Thanks!

 

We have never thrown one but have been to a few and your concerns are well valid. It can be tough if you are not comfortable, perhaps a little shy. I have the luxury of a attractive wife so she attracts couples right away. A great door opener. I am not a "dog" but it makes life easier when they come to you. We usually start by chatting about travel,etc... and then if there is the energy we may play. Other couples get right to it while others are reserved.

[Judy39 145]

Some of the things you could say are...

 

- You look cool, are you friendly? ;-)

 

- If you could fuck anyone you wanted in this room, who would that be?

 

Also, any kind of conversation about the other people who are some distance away from you can be fun, because it engages your dirty minds, I mean, sexy imagination. What are they up to? Do you think they will fuck each other? Will they fuck us? Everybody? Is she a screamer?.. You get the drift ;-)

 

For females, discussing outfits - past, present and ripped apart - never fails to entertain us!

[Tahoecple 319]

Well, there’s the method used by this cowboy buddy of mine.

 

He walked into a bar the other night and happened to see this good looking young lady sitting alone at the bar. He walked up and sat down on the stool beside her without saying a word, he just gave her a warm smile and a nod of his hat before diverting his attention back to his watch.

 

As he was totally focused on his watch the young lady kept taking furtive glances in his direction, attempting to figure out what he was doing. Finely curiosity got the best of her, “excuse me, I don’t mean to pry but would you mind telling me what you’re doing?”

 

With a warm smile he replied, “oh it’s nothing really, I’ve just got this hi-tech watch and I’m testing it out. It telepathically communicates with people near me and relays that information back to me.”

 

The young lady was now intrigued, “that’s fascinating, did it tell you anything about me.”

 

The cowboy replied with a sheepish smile, “yes mam it did, it said that you weren’t wearing any panties.”

 

The young lady chuckle as she replied, “well I hope you didn’t pay too much for that watch because it’s giving you faulty information.”

 

The cowboy feverishly goes through the functions on the watch for a few moments before stating, “Oh here’s the problem, the damn things an hour fast.”