How successful are cheaters on the swing sites? Do they get party invites?

[Jane1902 476]

Reading many posts here I get the sense most, but not all swingers, are not welcoming to cheaters yet there they are. Sometimes they admit it or there are obvious clues, they are also on vanilla sites. Anyone know how well they do? Some sites more welcoming than others?

[adamgunn 1,460]

Anytime we caught a whiff of a cheater on SLS, he/they were cut off.

 

Having said that, we weren't nearly so concerned at our club or a house party. I have no doubt some wiggled their way into those, and it's possible we played with them without knowing it.

[njbm 2,877]

We do not want to play with cheaters. We know who we are having sex with and we are there to see it. We find cheating to be dishonest and unfair.

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

We can only hope they fail and fail really well. We know that isn't the case, but we can hope. Cheating is the opposite of everything swinging is. Lies, deception and deceit instead of trust, honesty and love.

[Sweet.Pea 15]

After my somewhat acrimonious divorce, I had a sling-shot reaction and went out of my way to find cheating males on SLS, hook up with them hoping that I could hurt them if they get caught. That's a long story that I will not relate right now except to say that I got over it and now enjoy a normal relationship with a good man. Anyway, I'm here to say that cheaters do have success at websites. My ex trolled websites and fooled around with several women, some who knew that he was cheating, some who did not.

[intuition897 2,179]

We often find cheaters making their way to SB with the misconception that swinging and cheating are synonymous. They are, in fact, diametrically opposed practices. Cheating is a selfish act that disrespects all parties, and is dishonest and hurtful. Swinging, in contrast, is when all parties are fully informed, respected/respectful, and consenting.

 

This is why you'll find so many swingers opposed to - or even offended by - the idea of getting involved with someone who is being dishonest with their partner/spouse. They spend a lot of time and energy working on their relationship, fostering positive, honest communication, and they deeply value the integrity of that relationship. Frankly, for us, it's a turn-off to find out that we care more about a stranger's relationship than they do.

[Guest]

Personally I find the vast majority of single men on swinging sites are actually cheating on their wife or girlfriend.

 

I will state that "Not All" of them are cheaters, but yes it seems the vast majority of men on such sites are looking to cheat, we get messages from men all the time who are clearly cheating, about 50% of mens profiles all say the same things "Looking for discreet sex" or in other words looking for people to be my affair toys.

 

It kind of does my head in because if a man wants to cheat he would be much better joining a singles hook up site / affair website / singles looking for sex website.

 

Rather than trying to force an affair down a couples throat he would be better just joining a hook up site and finding other single who are also looking for extra fun.

 

It wastes an awful lot of our time chatting to men who turn out to be cheaters, we don't want such people in our life, if they are willing to lie to their own wife they sure as hell won't think twice about lying to us and putting our lives at risk.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

Personally I find the vast majority of single men on swinging sites are actually cheating on their wife or girlfriend.

Does not match my experience.

[Guest]

Why does this matter to anyone any more that why should it matter to others what we are doing? Our practices are right and pure and theirs aren’t? Who amongst us gets to draw those lines?

[Guest]

Does not match my experience.

 

 

I'd say here in the UK it is a real fact.

 

We get contacted by men on a daily basis looking to cheat on their wife or girlfriend.

[Jane1902 476]

As a single woman I refuse to play with cheaters, I won't play with a man with a hall pass unless I have met the other partner and she lets me know, I won't play with married women cheating. I am not perfect and people have their reasons but swinging, even as a single, is about being honest. I know some couples don't care as they feel it doesn't affect their relationship but I think this only continues to encourage the cheaters on a swinging site.

A couple of years ago I was having fantastic threesomes and occasionally meeting separately with two guys. I found out one was a cheat and immediately ended it with both as I felt the single guy had been complicit and question his motives for finally telling me.

Cheaters can distract the unicorns from the honest people looking to play.