New to Swinging

[CaliWheeling 15]

So me and my girlfriend are new to the whole swinging with strangers. We have messed around with friends, but are looking to expand our experiences. How do we start? Besides going to a bar and hoping to get lucky lol My girlfriend is a little shy about the whole thing.

[njbm 2,877]

There are websites for swingers such as SLS and SDC. Write a profile. Look for a meet and greet where you just meet other people, but do not necessarily play. Look up a swing club.Go and observe. Make sure that you and your partner are on the same page. Go as slow as the slower partner. Don’t do anything you both don’t want to do. Have fun, though. It is a very exciting hobby in the beginning.

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

To actually FIND other swingers, at the top of the page is a tab labelled Find Swingers. However, you should start by talking with each other, making sure your relationship is rock solid, that the lines of communication are wide open, establish what you are looking for and your boundaries and rules, and maybe then start looking for others to join you. Good luck.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

There are websites for swingers such as SLS and SDC. Write a profile. Look for a meet and greet where you just meet other people, but do not necessarily play. Look up a swing club. Go and observe. Make sure that you and your partner are on the same page. Go as slow as the slower partner. Don’t do anything you both don’t want to do. Have fun, though. It is a very exciting hobby in the beginning.

I would have said almost exactly the same. I will add that Web sites like these also have information about private parties. But private parties are typically a little overwhelming for people new to the lifestyle. Taking small steps is wise.

[Erik13 157]

Good luck going to a vanilla bar. That could get ugly.

[Guest]

It totally depends what your looking for:

 

If you want to swing with....

 

Men - Then use a on line swingers site, there are loads to choose from.

 

Couples - Then use a online swingers site, or attend a swinger club or event.

 

Women - Personally 99% of the women I have had MFF threesomes with have all been met in real life, I meet them at bars / clubs / events / on the train / whilst out for meals, ECT.

 

 

One of the best bits of advice I can give is to learn how to ask people for a threesome WITHOUT ASKING THEM FOR A THREESOME.

 

Lets say your at a bar / at an event and you meet someone you like (male or female it doesn't matter) and you get talking.

 

You make general chat for a while, nice weather were having, what do you think of this place, you been here long, you here with your partner, what do you think of the music, blarr, blarr, blarr.

 

Once you have a conversation going then simply say something like......

 

 

"Hey I guess this is really weird but I could do with some random opinions about this, but last week a friend of mine said him and his wife was planning to have a threesome with someone and it caught me a little off guard and I wasn't really sure what to think, what do you think of the threesome subject, sorry if asking is strange just wondering what opinions people have about that subject?"

 

 

OR SAY.....

 

 

"Hey here's a weird subject but the other day they was talking about threesomes on some new program, apparently they are really popular now, I was shocked I didn't think they would speak about such things on the day time TV, what do you think of the threesome subject, do you think things like that would be okay or bad?"

 

 

Now that person will generally give 1 of two possible answers.

 

 

NEGATIVE ANSWER: "Eeeewwww that's perverted, I'd never do anything like that, no way I'd never have a threesome, that would be horrible"

 

In this case you know not to ask any more threesome questions.

 

POSITIVE ANSWER: "Yeah threesomes sound fun, I guess they could be exciting, I'd not really be against that, people are free to explore"

 

Then basically you know there is a good chance that person will say YES to a threesome

 

If for whatever reason the person becomes upset with you asking that question, if they suddenly think you are a pervert for talking about such things you can simply say....

 

"Oh NO don't get me wrong I wasn't asking you for a threesome I was just wondering about peoples opinions because my friend asked me about it, or because I noticed a news report about it. Yeah I'm like you I think they are disgusting, I was really shocked when my friend / the TV mentioned it, sorry for bothering you with such a silly question"

 

 

Your NOT asking a person to have a threesome with you, in fact you are simply asking the persons opinion about the threesome subject, you are indirectly asking them if they could consider a threesome.

 

 

Most of the women I have had threesomes with have been met in that exact way, if they reply in a negative fashion I back off the subject and usually end the conversation within the next 5 minutes "Oh well it was nice to meet you, have a good night" and then I leave and find someone else to talk with.

 

If they reply in a positive fashion then I simply ask for their phone number or if I can add them to face book. If they ask why? I simply say I'd like to chat more with them if that's okay, after that point, after I know they are positive about the threesome subject and are currently single then I message them and explain the situation or ask to meet them for a coffee and explain then.

 

 

Really all your doing is finding people who have positive opinions about threesomes, your NOT asking a women to have a threesome, your simply finding her opinion about the subject, those who give a positive reply will generally say yes to a threesome with you if approached correctly after.

[PSULioness 857]

How about asking your friends that you have already played with. Maybe they can introduce to people they know and you don't. They will be strangers to you but safer than meeting total strangers.