Needing advice on getting started swinging

[1st3way4fun 42]

My wife is curious and excited, yet apprehensive about another man joining us. We're high school sweethearts, who have been married for 27yrs. As such, I'm the only man she's been with. Does anyone have any advice for her as to how to break the ice, so to speak. Visiting a swingers club is the most common advice we've heard so far. Anything would be greatly appreciated.

[JandKinBoise 862]

We were in the exact same boat. We 'interviewed' a few men, first thru e-mail then in person if we found one interesting. We were very honest about our experience and expectations. Once we found a man she felt comfortable with, we had him over for an evening. She still wanted to be passive so I undressed her, blindfolded her and covered her body, then invited him in. About 10 seconds after the first sound of a belt buckle rattle, the blindfold and cover came off and she was off to the races.

Now..Remember that a woman has to first wrap her head around the fact that she is going to basically flush her feelings of being a good girl and cross over into the slut category. There is not a thin line separating those 2. It's a big fat line, built on decades of social norms. What my wife did was hire a therapist and spent a couple sessions learning to deal with crossing this line. My wife has the most open mind of any woman I know. She was very open to me after a short time and told me she is fully ready to do 2 guys. As will probably be the case with your wife, it's not doing 2 guys that poses the problem. It's having the man she loves see her do something that is the opposite of what she vowed. Good luck and remember her feelings always.

[GoldCoCouple 4,070]

Visiting a swingers club is the most common because it is probably the best option right now. The hardest part of visiting a club is getting the courage up to walk thru the door. After that, nothing will happen unless you both want something more to happen. It really is hot, sexy fun even if it is only the two of you watching what goes on with others (and they usually won't mind you watching...imagine live porn that you can even make suggestions while it is happening or even ask to join in). It will also put her more at ease when she sees that it's not all just porn stars and beautiful people who are there. People of every body type, personality, nationality, economic status, and religion are there and having a great time.

 

Otherwise, you can start interviewing 'prospects' as JandK suggested above. Just because you are interviewing and possibly meeting them in person it doesn't mean that anything will happen (and we don't like to have anything happening at the first in person meeting). This can also be crazy fun knowing that you are meeting a person or couple that you are thinking about possibly having sex with. Just remember, don't move faster than she is comfortable with and that you are doing this TOGETHER. Make sure that she feels like she is totally involved as well and not being dragged along behind you down this trail. Good luck and let us know how things are going.

[1st3way4fun 42]

Pretty much in the same place. We've explored the idea through the use of toys, and have found that she really, really enjoys the physical feeling of two at once, which is obviously different than an actual human being. That leaves her with the mental hurdle, which can be quite a hurdle for the woman who has been the "good girl" her entire life. Thank you for the reply!

[LJ90 15]

We are in the same boat too

Good luck!

[Out-N-About 52]

That’s exactly what we’ve done, plus pretending and talking like others are there with us. It’s a real turn on, but we’re eager for our first real encounter.