The case For playing with friends

[PSULioness 841]

I would like to state the reasons For playing with friends. I see on to Poll topic on this board this topic never ends. The great majority say don’t play with friends, not even friends you have made while playing with them. I ask, who better to play with? I understand some people like to have sex with strangers. No attachments sometimes without even know a name. Have sex, go home.

I had one nighters as a single woman. I’ve had a number in college as well. To be honest I had guilt after one nighters. Self doubt. I know I am younger than most on here but I am sure the vast majority had one nighters.

My intro to the LS was with a colle friend. I was the unicorn. It was a threesome and I had sex with a girlfriend. It did cause guilt. Guilt of having sex with a female. Guilt of cheating on my boyfriend. What I loved was having fun with someone who I have shared many other fun things with. Our relationship was not based on sex alone. I soon learned that other friends from college were into playing too. It surprised me at first. My boyfriend, who I have since married was upset with my newfound experience. I think with the help of a few girlfriends his being upset was turned into being the luckiest guy.

For the most part our play friends are friends of mine from college and live hours from us. We have met new friends mostly from my old friends. We enjoy the parties we have gone to. We also enjoy tailgating, going to games, and just hanging out. Not everything is sex. Bringing our LS to our local friends was scary for me because I read the downside so many have written about. My husbands best friend and then my best friend. Our guy friend was very eager to play. Surprise surprise. What really amazed me was the willingness of my girlfriend wanting to join me and my husband. Both of these people are close friends who we enjoy being with. Our friendships go much further than sex. Sex has just added a new dynamic to what we already have. The only thing that might be better, and I did say might, would be my girlfriends willingness to be more open with bisexual play. I respect her and won’t push.

[ViSexual 1,008]

As I've said before, four of the five swinging partners my wife and I shared were couples who were already friends. And we didn't have any issues with any of them.

 

For me, there's just something comfortable about a new sex partner being an old friend that I already found appealing. And, hey, the fact that I knew, and trusted, the other husband made me a lot more comfortable about him being with my wife.

 

 

One of my favorite experiences was about the fifth time we played with one of those couples. We all loaded into a customized van and drove 500 miles together for a three day weekend at the beach. I remember how fun it was when I was driving and my wife and the other husband went to the back to play. His wife and I watched and coached them from the front seats. Then he took over the driving and my wife took the front passenger seat while the other wife and I had our turn in the back.

 

 

Now with strangers, I'm not sure it would have been as much fun. After our little swap, we all laughed and talked about vanilla things we'd done together on the trip down.

 

 

And, when we got there we had adjoining rooms. We drank and danced in the club with our own and each others partners. We slept in each of the rooms those three nights, sometimes with our own spouses, sometimes with the other spouses, sometimes in our own beds, and sometimes in the other beds.

 

 

It was just four good friends enjoying an exciting long weekend together. I also, fondly, remember the trip home in that van. There was no sex involved and we played name-that-tune singing oldies together. The only reason that friendship finally ended was because we moved far away and, after a few years of seeing each other only once or twice a year, we just sort of lost contact.

 

 

If you think about it, the best non-sexually friends you've ever had were ones you felt free to discuss sex with, right? Well, what better folks to have sex with?

[ViSexual 1,008]

And one thing I'd like to add about that couple. Now I've probably said this here on some other thread but...

 

This was a couple that we'd gone out with many times. We'd had them over to our home and had gone to their home many times. There was no secret that he found my wife appealing, she found him appealing, and his wife and I had always flirted a bit.

 

Well imagine the excitement when one evening we were talking about people and a man's name was mentioned by one of us. This man happened to be a single swinger and there was no other way for the person, I can't remember which of us, who said his name would know him other than from swinging.

 

 

There was a long moment of silence while the four of us digested the situation. Then the smiles began to creep over all four of our faces. As enjoyable as our conversations had always been, the conversations that followed were even better. We didn't have sex that night. But, talk about being on cloud nine knowing that we were all going to fulfill some desires with each other in the near future.

 

I have no idea what they talked about after we left that night but my wife and I sure talked a lot about how we were looking forward to being in bed with them.

[GoldCoCouple 4,065]

Most lottery tickets are not winners...Swinging with friends (IOHO) is like buying a lottery ticket. For some it has worked out great, but most of the time it will lead to disappointment. The price of the ticket (for us) isn't worth the potential winnings. Not saying that others will have the same result, but if you choose to travel this path, be aware of the potential problems from the start.

[Guest]

Obviously much of the literature and or opinion out there states that swinging with friends is somehow more risky that swinging with others. But, consider, to some degree you know far more about the health habits, sexual history and emotional stability of friends than you do with strangers. We started with strangers, both swaps and MFM, and then after several, brought a male friend into it with us. It was wonderful, worked very well. Gradually, our MFM activity has moved away from strangers and would we love to find other friend couples as well but that seems a bit harder. Even outside of swinging with them, having a more sexual relationship with our male friends is quite nice for me.

[CandDinCo 69]

Everywhere have played with were already friends. Don't ask me how the subject was breached, I don't remember. But it did make it easier to keep in line with our number one rule; don't screw up anyone's relationship. Not our own or others. Being friends first, none of us want to ruin our friends marriages, so we don't do anything to make any of the others mad. No private play ect.

 

So far it has worked well. And been at it for 14 years.

[ViSexual 1,008]

So, there are some of us who do play with friends. I guess it depends on what you're looking for. If it's just immediate gratification, strangers work best. But if, like me, you prefer taking your time and building up to the act, good friends are best. When I was single I had a lot of one-night-stands with gals I'd pick up at a club. And I had numerous ladies that I dated. I can't remember a single name of the one nighters or even remember if the sex was good or bad.

[findinganswers 369]

Here’s to friends

We agree that friends make the best play partners

[M1F2KTJ 473]

There is comfort in playing with someone you know and trust. Your relationship will change/be different if you have sex with them.

[JandKinBoise 858]

Like on Jurassic Park, Sure at first it's all beautiful and fun, but later, running and screaming.

We have stumbled into bed with friends over the years. None are still friends. We have made friends from people we met swinging. It always gets weird at some point. Maybe a year or 3 down the road but it seems there is always someone that feels this would be a better situation if they shit all over it.

So have fun and I sincerely hope it lasts forever. Watch for red flags though.