Help, best friend wants me to have threesome with his wife.

[Whatamidoing 15]

My best friend had told me that he is interested to have a threesome with his wife, and he told that she likes me. I had never imagined that before. I like the idea although I absolutely know nothing about it more than porn, and I don’t want to lose his friendship.

[ViSexual 1,008]

If you read through the many posts here, you'll find that a lot of couples want to have threesomes. And some, like your friends, prefer the third to be someone they already know, trust, and like.

 

OK, just so you'll know, there are two types of threesomes that involve a married couple and another guy. MFM is when, as it appears, the wife is the center of attention and the husband and other man attend to her. In this case it's sometimes only the other male and the wife together and the husband just knows and/or watches.

 

In a MMF, as it appears, the husband is bisexual and the three are all involved with all. I suggest that you give this some thought and then discuss it with your friend.

 

First of all, if you and his wife were single and met at a bar, would you want to be with her? If so, this might be a really fun thing for you. If not, you probably wouldn't be doing this couple a favor by going along. Just tell your friend that you'd really not be comfortable with it.

 

I don't think you'd be here if you weren't interested. Take your time. Talk to your friend in length. Ask if they've done this before. Ask if there would be any rules, or limits, that you should be aware of. Talk to her and make sure that she's not just doing it for him.

 

 

If everything sounds good, just flirt with her and let her know that you're flattered that they chose you. And, most important of all, always remember that you are their marital sex aid.

 

 

OK, just two cents worth from someone who was the third for over five years for a great couple. And, I'll always have wonderful memories of that relationship.

[Whatamidoing 15]

Thank you for the detailed response, I’ll have to search for a lot of answers within, and with my friend.

 

Yesterday night it was an exciting idea for me, now I’m more calm and would want to know more details. I’ll keep you posted.

[PSULioness 857]

My husband invited his best friend to join us in bed. My husband and I had a number of ffm playtimes all with college friends of mine. We have also been to parties, again with my college friends. When he suggested his/our guy friend I had all the typical feelings about friends. I know it was crazy to question mixing friends and sex, we had already played with many of my friends, though all of those friends were not in our daily life. They for the most part don’t live near us. The other thing was all of our play contained bisexual sex only with the girls. I never saw any guy bi sex. It never came up in conversation that the guys didn’t play with each other. When he suggested bringing a guy into our bed I asked him about that. He said he had no desires at all for that and that a threesome had nothing to do with bisexuality. It was all about me and he had no problem watching me enjoy someone who we both like. Our first time was a little strange at first but turned into a great time. Since then we have enjoyed many times together and my husband is fine with our friend visiting when my husband travels for business.

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

Playing with people you know will either be great or a train wreck. While some here have played with friends and other people they know with success, the question is are you willing to risk it if things go bad? Do a search about "playing with friends" and you should get numerous threads discussing the topic with all of the pros and cons. Biggest con is things go south and you not only loose a friend but he (or she depending on circumstances) tells everyone you know about what kind of sexual activity you enjoy...friends, family, everyone. We personally don't think it's worth the risk but your results may vary...good luck.

[TwoFunTexans 103]

I would ask them how long they have been swingers and how experienced they are. If they've been in the lifestyle for a few years and have lots of experience I'd say it would be pretty safe in regards to the friendship being safe as long as you aren't the one who gets weird.

[couplers 4,649]

My husband invited his best friend to join us in bed... It was all about me and he had no problem watching me enjoy someone who we both like. Our first time was a little strange at first but turned into a great time. Since then we have enjoyed many times together and my husband is fine with our friend visiting when my husband travels for business.

Hi, Petra here. The great thing about having a close, trusted relationship with a male play partner is having sexual satisfaction when your husband is unavailable because he is away, wrapped up in a work project, or just too tired. It's also great to have a female friend nearby to enjoy your bi side when you are feeling it. Keep us posted, I like knowing about situations that are working out. Thanks.

[PSULioness 857]

Hi, Petra here. The great thing about having a close, trusted relationship with a male play partner is having sexual satisfaction when your husband is unavailable because he is away, wrapped up in a work project, or just too tired. It's also great to have a female friend nearby to enjoy your bi side when you are feeling it. Keep us posted, I like knowing about situations that are working out. Thanks.

 

Hi Petra

I want to say having sex with our friend was weird that first time. A few things made it weird, a threesome with another male, we had female friends before. And this friend is in our everyday life. Our other playing were with people who are my friends who I don’t see that often. Having him stay over when my husband was gone was very different. I can say having sex alone with him felt different than when the three of us are together. Hard to explain why. As far as having someone to be with when my husband travels can be fun but being alone is fine too. As far as my bi side, I don’t have anyone close that can come over on a regular basis.

[couplers 4,649]

I want to say having sex with our friend was weird that first time. A few things made it weird, a threesome with another male, we had female friends before. And this friend is in our everyday life. Our other playing were with people who are my friends who I don’t see that often..

Hi again Lioness, I suppose a lot of how you feel about any new sexual experience depends on past experiences and the approach. For me, my first MFM (and first time swinging at all) was with guys I knew well. After calling it off with my fiancé and moving out but not stop seeing/sleeping with him, I met the guy who became my husband. After a number of dates and eventually starting to have sex, I told my new boyfriend about my ex and unexpectedly, he was fine with it. (He was sexually experienced, but no swinging.) Me being in love and sleeping with two accepting guys went against everything I was taught and expected, but damn, it made me feel confident, attractive, capable. After several weeks they met, then after a couple of months we started threesomes. So I was having sex with both guys before we started having threesomes. The first MFM was weird, even disorienting, but I remember the primary feeling was "This is how it should be; I deserve this!"

 

As far as having someone to be with when my husband travels can be fun but being alone is fine too.

I need alone time too, but after a while if I dont have sex, I get tense and edgy. Masturbation is fine and what I resort to when I'm away from home on business, but it's not as satisfying as a real person. I take it that you're young, as you get older (30s) you may find, as the women in our family have, that you'll desire sex more often. It's good your husband gives you the option.

 

As far as my bi side, I don’t have anyone close that can come over on a regular basis.

About two years after we married, I overcame my jealousy (hypocritical, I know) and started involving women with my husband (boyfriend wasn't interesed at first (ö) ). It was a great maturing development for me. We took it slow, "dating" women together so when the subject came up I could tell them directly that it was OK to sleep with my husband. More women than I expected did (my husband is fit, attractive and polite), but few would let me watch, and fewer let me join in, something more and more I wanted to do. The handful that did let me participate opened me up to Lesbian activity (I call it what it is, "bi" isn't the word I use to describe it), which turned out to be an awakening for me. Two of those women, along with me and the two guys, formed our poly family.

[couplers 4,649]

My husband invited his best friend to join us in bed. My husband and I had a number of ffm playtimes all with college friends of mine. ...Since then we have enjoyed many times together and my husband is fine with our friend visiting when my husband travels for business.

Two other observations. From what I recall of your earlier posts and what you've said here, your first swinging experience with a guy was your husband's friend. Interesting how both your husband and I had our respective spouses first play with someone who we chose.

 

Also, does your husband play alone when you're away from home? It seems that successful swinging couples don't try to force symmetry and reciprocity in what is going on. Whatever works, works.

[PSULioness 857]

Two other observations. From what I recall of your earlier posts and what you've said here, your first swinging experience with a guy was your husband's friend. Interesting how both your husband and I had our respective spouses first play with someone who we chose.

 

Also, does your husband play alone when you're away from home? It seems that successful swinging couples don't try to force symmetry and reciprocity in what is going on. Whatever works, works.

 

Good morning. Answering you after a fun night and on our way to a long day at a football game with those friends.

 

My first swinging experience started with going to a football game too. It was with a girlfriend and a guy she was with. We didn’t rush into inviting his friend into our bed. Our original playing centered on my college girlfriends and their boyfriend or husbands. I was more acting out at side I didn’t know I had. My playing with the guys was fun though not the main reason. I did play more recently with my husband’s best friend. You are right to think he is the one I play with alone when my husband is away.

 

I don’t travel without my husband. He isn’t home alone much. He has played with my closest friend recently and I left them alone. She is not bi and I know she wasn’t comfortable with me touching her when the three of us were in bed together.