Man too big for my wife

[njbm 2,873]

We are on a lifestyle cruise. So is a couple who we like very much, who we have played with several times. The man has a very large penis and my wife is teeny tiny. She doesn’t want to play with him, I understand. What do we do? A. Tell him B. Duck him C.?.

[Alura 2,774]

Honesty is the best policy.

[Guest]

How do you know it’s too big? I’m 5’2”, just 105 pounds. We got involved with a guy as part of an MFM. We had seen him naked, before and he didn’t look any bigger than any of the other guys (it was a nude area in the dunes), but when he got aroused his penis just kept growing. Since it was apart of an MFM, things were going quickly, I was turned on, tried it orally and was fascinated and, to my hubby’s surprise, I eventually took it all vaginally and enjoyed far more than I expected. I was always a size doesn’t matter girl. So, as the commercial went, try it, maybe you’ll enjoy it more than you thinks.

[adamgunn 1,460]

Since you've played with them several times before, I assume they are friends. You should be honest with them, else you risk losing their friendship. Perhaps you can tell them (assuming it's true,) that you wouldn't mind playing with them, but penetration between the other husband and your wife is off the table.

[couplers 4,648]

Babies come out of there. Just let him know of your concern (he'll be flattered), go easy, and all will be fine.

[Brimba 30]

Be honest and tell the guy the truth - that it is nice of him to be friends but his cock is too much for a small pussy. You are on a Lifestyle Cruise and therefore there are cocks there that may fit your wife's pussy nicely.

[njbm 2,873]

How do you know it’s too big? I’m 5’2”, just 105 pounds. We got involved with a guy as part of an MFM. We had seen him naked, before and he didn’t look any bigger than any of the other guys (it was a nude area in the dunes), but when he got aroused his penis just kept growing. Since it was apart of an MFM, things were going quickly, I was turned on, tried it orally and was fascinated and, to my hubby’s surprise, I eventually took it all vaginally and enjoyed far more than I expected. I was always a size doesn’t matter girl. So, as the commercial went, try it, maybe you’ll enjoy it more than you thinks.

My wife has played with him several times and she thought he was too big. The guy is about 6’4” and he has a big penis. My wife is 4’10, 95 lbs., never had a baby and does not self-lubricate easily. She will just have to break it to him as tactfully as possible.

[jnrswinger 62]

My wife has played with him several times and she thought he was too big. The guy is about 6’4” and he has a big penis. My wife is 4’10, 95 lbs., never had a baby and does not self-lubricate easily. She will just have to break it to him as tactfully as possible.

 

Hmmm, that could be awkward since she has already played with him several times and suddenly she is going to tell him he is too big. As she does not lubricate naturally very well has she tried lubricants? I have to admit it must be an interesting sight seeing your 4'10" wife playing under a 6'4" man.

[TricianMike 772]

I never found the height of a man is an indication of penis size. The problem is the non-lubricating that can be caused my age or medical problems. If she is dry it will hurt with a small penis too. Using a lube or even oral sex with plenty of saliva could help. If size is really the problem she can control things by taking the top. I am thinking he isn’t more than 7 inches.

Just a suggestion, your wife should discuss her dryness with her doctor.

[njbm 2,873]

Both the other couple and our couple are finding enough to do. My wife has a great lube collection and has conferred with her doctor, but those of us over 60 do not have the same response system that we had at 25.

[jnrswinger 62]

I never found the height of a man is an indication of penis size. The problem is the non-lubricating that can be caused my age or medical problems. If she is dry it will hurt with a small penis too. Using a lube or even oral sex with plenty of saliva could help. If size is really the problem she can control things by taking the top. I am thinking he isn’t more than 7 inches.

Just a suggestion, your wife should discuss her dryness with her doctor.

 

Absolutely. There is no correlation between man's penis size and any other part of his body. It was just the visual of a 6'4" man on top of a 4'10" woman regardless of penis size (or breast size for that matter).

[Guest]

When I was younger and thought one might be too big, I just sucked and stroked it. Never heard anyone complain about me doing so. And big one are especially fun for both of those.

[Cade# 22]

Get wet. Lubricant can go a long way to easing intercourse with a bigger guy. In fact, it's a must. There's a wide variety of lubes out there, from thin and slippery to thicker and more viscous. To prevent breakage, remember to use a lube that's compatible with the type of condom he using. So start experimenting!

[findinganswers 369]

I don’t go around measuring our friends. We all know That Guy who is bigger. The women in our play group come in all different sizes and shapes and some women do seem to be tighter than others. I never found any of them to be dry after just a little play. I’m sure you are right that age and menopause can affect lubrication.

I worried the first time my wife played with the larger friend. I worried more for myself than for her. I can report that he didn’t her nor did he ruin her for me.

If your wife doesn’t want to play with him be honest and say he is too big. I’m sure he will take it as a compliment.

[agreatguy 269]

Get wet. Lubricant can go a long way to easing intercourse with a bigger guy. In fact, it's a must. There's a wide variety of lubes out there, from thin and slippery to thicker and more viscous. To prevent breakage, remember to use a lube that's compatible with the type of condom he using. So start experimenting!

 

I've stayed out of this conversation because I didn't think I had much to offer but this reply was over the top.

 

@Cade#

Lubrication is only a small part of the equation when it comes a woman's anatomy accommodating(especially) a larger than normal guy. Some anatomical things happen for a woman starting with blood flow which starts from the brain just like us guys. We have to want it first. A guy has it easy, he has to have blood flow to get an erection and then it's game on. For a woman that blood flow makes it possible for her to self lubricate, changes her vagina, clitoris and cervix all making entrance of a penis more comfortable and that's just a portion of what needs to happen physiologically speaking. Add to that the fact that this guys cock is intimidating she just isn't going to get there. Suggesting she just lubes up and takes it shows a complete ignorance of female anatomy and arousal.

 

@ the OP,

My guess is that it really is more of a mental thing for her. She's tried and it was uncomfortable. I doubt it was completely physiological because as someone said babies come out of there so it was probably more mental. Most likely the chemistry just wasn't there for whatever reason which kept her from reaching a level of arousal needed to accommodate him. That's probably not going to get any better with him. Good for you for trying to figure out a way to let them down rather than asking what to do to help your wife be able to perform! It shows you're on the same team.

 

Regarding doctors, I will offer this up. My wife has had a total hysterectomy so for a few years she was on oral estrogen. It worked fine, she had a healthy libido and she lubricated quite nicely but about the middle of last summer (2017) we started noticing a difference. Her arousal wasn't quite what it had been and neither was her lubrication. Her doctor just wanted to up the dose which didn't sound like the best option. She tried pellets which added testosterone. That helped but in the mean time she managed to get an appointment with a Endo at a highly respected mid-west clinic. They freaked out at the amount of Testosterone she was on. They took her off everything to get her base levels which took about 4 months to get the hormones out of her system. They then started her on a patch which is about the size of a small fingernail which she changes twice a week. It's very discreet. She is back to her old horny self and no worries about the long term side effects of oral estrogen. Because oral estrogen has to be metabolized through the liver there are some bad things that can happen if taken over more than about 5 years. If your wife's doc has her on oral estrogen and maybe supplementing that with Progestin for some cancer preventative she's probably been on it too long. Seek out an endocrinologist who specialized in post menopausal women. It's worth the little bit of extra money to get someone who does it day in and day out.

 

So, how did the cruise go?

[njbm 2,873]

We chose C. We saw the couple a lot, all of us were friendly, but neither couple asked to play. So it worked out.

 

The cruise was a lot of fun. We had a few encounters and a couple of cancellations due to the other couples’ illness, which we welcomed to get a rest. We can’t do it every day for a week! We are over 60. But if you are the type and age such that you want daily or more sex, the Bliss cruise is your ticket!

[Cade# 22]

I've stayed out of this conversation because I didn't think I had much to offer but this reply was over the top.

 

@Cade#

Lubrication is only a small part of the equation when it comes a woman's anatomy accommodating(especially) a larger than normal guy. Some anatomical things happen for a woman starting with blood flow which starts from the brain just like us guys. We have to want it first. A guy has it easy, he has to have blood flow to get an erection and then it's game on. For a woman that blood flow makes it possible for her to self lubricate, changes her vagina, clitoris and cervix all making entrance of a penis more comfortable and that's just a portion of what needs to happen physiologically speaking. Add to that the fact that this guys cock is intimidating she just isn't going to get there. Suggesting she just lubes up and takes it shows a complete ignorance of female anatomy and arousal.

 

@ the OP,

My guess is that it really is more of a mental thing for her. She's tried and it was uncomfortable. I doubt it was completely physiological because as someone said babies come out of there so it was probably more mental. Most likely the chemistry just wasn't there for whatever reason which kept her from reaching a level of arousal needed to accommodate him. That's probably not going to get any better with him. Good for you for trying to figure out a way to let them down rather than asking what to do to help your wife be able to perform! It shows you're on the same team.

 

Regarding doctors, I will offer this up. My wife has had a total hysterectomy so for a few years she was on oral estrogen. It worked fine, she had a healthy libido and she lubricated quite nicely but about the middle of last summer (2017) we started noticing a difference. Her arousal wasn't quite what it had been and neither was her lubrication. Her doctor just wanted to up the dose which didn't sound like the best option. She tried pellets which added testosterone. That helped but in the mean time she managed to get an appointment with a Endo at a highly respected mid-west clinic. They freaked out at the amount of Testosterone she was on. They took her off everything to get her base levels which took about 4 months to get the hormones out of her system. They then started her on a patch which is about the size of a small fingernail which she changes twice a week. It's very discreet. She is back to her old horny self and no worries about the long term side effects of oral estrogen. Because oral estrogen has to be metabolized through the liver there are some bad things that can happen if taken over more than about 5 years. If your wife's doc has her on oral estrogen and maybe supplementing that with Progestin for some cancer preventative she's probably been on it too long. Seek out an endocrinologist who specialized in post menopausal women. It's worth the little bit of extra money to get someone who does it day in and day out.

 

So, how did the cruise go?

 

yes i know that:). i mean gel like durex