By
EastInWest
Some people here have probably seen my previous posts about our experiences with Mrs. E's long-time friend and her significant other ("husband" for simplicity). The conversation had started gently a year or two after she let it slip during a girl talk phone conversation that I had a related fantasy, and when we were visiting them in Vegas in the fall, Mrs. E's friend made it known that her and her husband sometimes played with another couple and that we were invited to hang out at their pool if we were inclined.
This was what she needed to get started, since she was comfortable with her friend and friend's husband, and while we kept the night "soft", she tried and learned a lot. The following night we connected with that couple alone and did our first full swap.
In the spring, we met up with her friend and husband again and spent a long weekend at a vanilla resort, which also went unexpectedly great. They gave us the space we needed to enjoy the city and still have plenty of playtime with them. No tension at all.
So now fall is rolling around again and they're suggesting we all meet up in Palm Springs. Us, them, and the third couple.
I've been to Palm Springs, Mrs. E hasn't. I know it's smallish and it's implied there will be a lot more free time hanging around the resort than on our last trip to a busier area, but overall, I like the idea and think with two couples there, it might actually be just as easy for any of us to get some alone time when we need it. She likes it, too. However, she only had some soft play with both the husband and the wife from the third couple. We both like the wife, they got some girl-talk bonding in after playing before she played with the husband and they've stayed in touch, and we have no strong opinions about the husband. He was in her mouth while I was behind her for Mrs. E's first "spit roast", and that's about the extent of our connection with him.
Point is, she's maybe overthinking full swap with them. Part of this might be because she only met them the once and hasn't seen them face-to-face in a full year. Part of this might be because the wife likes girl-on-girl play and Mrs. E is tweaking herself out about seeing her again. I've reminded her that ultimately, there's no rule that says we have to do full swap with them or that she has to indulge with the wife, but I get the same answer I often get about going to a club.
"We can't go there and just NOT, that would be weird."
Anybody have any advice to put her at ease? Should we have a conversation with somebody, here? She isn't typically a very direct person and I don't think she wants to talk to the third wife about how she feels about it. I've put off the decision as long as possible, she doesn't want to say 'no' and really wants to go to Palm Springs, but it's time to buy tickets.
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