Meeting Single Guys - Best Way

[nyc play couple 16]

It’s been a long time since we were connected to the clubs, probably 20-25 years since we’ve had any experience. When we were younger, we mostly enjoyed 3-way play with single women, I was very blessed with many experiences and we actually had a real good long-term relationship with one woman.

 

We also played with couples and I enjoyed seeing her with another man, but again there was always a woman involved, which is something I really liked.

 

Flash forward a few decades and I’m not nearly as agile as I used to be. Our sex life has made adjustments along with the changes I’ve undergone and we’re quite happy. My best skills were always with my hands and mouth anyway! But the truth of the matter is that my days of giving my wife a deep, hard fucking are over.

 

And so, our conversations while we have sex have recently began to include another man. This is not a threesome scenario, I don’t join in nor do I get undressed. I’m there to watch her and when needed -- to hold her hand, to talk dirty in her ear.

 

In our fantasies, I usually partially undress her in front of the man. Exposing her, offering her to him. It’s all good stuff, gets us hot and we both come real good talking about it.

 

And so, how to take the next step? We thought about posting a personal ad here. We talked about looking to see if there were any off-premise clubs around that admitted single men. And we’ve talked about just going to a regular local bar in Brooklyn or Queens or Long Island.

 

For some reason, we’ve gotten it into our heads that we’d have better luck at a regular bar. There always seems to be a guy there on his own. We’re thinking if we make friendly and we hit it off, the suggestion of fucking my wife might go over really well.

 

We tested this theory a few weeks ago, before Christmas. We hit a bar in Sunnyside and ended up talking to this really young guy. For us, anything under 30 seems really young :-) He was a good looking guy, we were talking about music and movies. He wasn’t there to meet anyone, just blowing off steam on a Friday Night.

 

We had our opportunity – and we blew it. We hesitated and some friends of his came in and that was that. Lesson learned! While he was at the juke box, my wife and I had a few moments to see how we both felt and all systems were go. But I hesitated, just a few moments was all, and the opportunity was gone.

 

If we place a personal ad we know that isn’t likely to happen. We would all know what we were there for.

 

So, why our hesitation to place a personal ad?

 

I dunno. I used to think that it was because we wanted to retain as much control as possible? That maybe we felt like a regular guy going to the bar would be easier to navigate.

 

Now we’re not too sure. Now we are thinking we might be better off either placing an ad or looking for off-premise clubs or meeting places, if there are any.

 

Any thoughts are appreciated.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

My wife and I have no experience and have never contemplated picking up a guy at a bar or a swingers' club but I'm confident that there are members who will be able to make suggestions on how to increase your chances of success. I expect you'll hear from them. Regarding the posting of an advertisement here at Swingersboard, do not expect too much. I cannot say that it never happens but the board is not fundamentally designed for making hook-ups. Off premise clubs might just be the places for you and your wife.

[JandKinBoise 858]

Hello NYC!

 

Finding a guy on line is how you want to do it. Look over sites to find one that has the type of connection you seek. Craigslist used to have a specific breakdown of nsa hookup variations. That was good because you want your ad to be specific. A wide net will flood your inbox. A narrow net will flood your inbox as well but make it easier to cull. Specific title to start "Couple seeks respectful male for ongoing fwb relationship". Now, that will bring in the hordes.

In the body, list specific needs and request how these needs will be fulfilled. This forces the replier to read and write. Grade his writing like a 7th grade English teacher. Low quality writing tells a story you don't need to hear. Ignoring your needs, means he can't fulfill them or didn't read the ad. Either way..delete.

Your ad will be long, too long for most to read to the end. Toward the end, but not right at the end, put a sentence, "in the subj of replies, enter blue or your reply will not be opened". ANY reply without your keyword needs to be deleted without opening. Trust me on this. Now you can go thru the few remaining, and look for red flags.

Start a conversation with the ones you like, do this together. Do not send pictures but you can request them.

When you finally connect, keep your time together minimal and sex based. We (I) made the mistake of befriending the high quality guy we decided on. We took him on vacations and such. I could have easily lost my wife to him. Very rich, very good looking, very big dick that could fuck for hours, very in love with my wife. Love was the only thing that kept my under-endowed broke-ass with her.

And lastly, enjoy !

btw, ALL the advise given was learned the hard way, before we found this site. Also, a pay site will work way better than our method which was craigslist. Low population kinda forced our hand, better luck to you.

[nyc play couple 16]

Thank you both - greatly appreciated!

 

J&K thanks for sharing, great feedback!

[Guest]

We go to a nice bar, like a nice hotel bar or a resort bar. I dress on the sexy side and before long, some guy starts chatting with us and one thing leads to another. If I find him interesting, I can pursue him. If I don’t, I don’t an can move on to the next. I find this much better than meeting up with someone from SLS or wherever. Those guys arrive, if they don’t stand you up, and have expectations. Some seem to think that having a little conversation means saying hi before they put you on the bar to have their way with you. Our way, the guy slowly begins to realize that hey, there might be an opportunity here. They are thrilled to hve any type of activity rather than expecting that you do everything on the first date, on top of the bar for all to view.

[nyc play couple 16]

We go to a nice bar, like a nice hotel bar or a resort bar. I dress on the sexy side and before long, some guy starts chatting with us and one thing leads to another. If I find him interesting, I can pursue him. If I don’t, I don’t an can move on to the next. I find this much better than meeting up with someone from SLS or wherever. Those guys arrive, if they don’t stand you up, and have expectations. Some seem to think that having a little conversation means saying hi before they put you on the bar to have their way with you. Our way, the guy slowly begins to realize that hey, there might be an opportunity here. They are thrilled to hve any type of activity rather than expecting that you do everything on the first date, on top of the bar for all to view.

 

Thank you, this really captured what we were feeling. We've gotten so much excitement even from our missed opportunity that we're inclined to stick with that approach for now. Thanks again!

[Guest sdsevits]

It’s been a long time since we were connected to the clubs, probably 20-25 years since we’ve had any experience. When we were younger, we mostly enjoyed 3-way play with single women, I was very blessed with many experiences and we actually had a real good long-term relationship with one woman.

 

We also played with couples and I enjoyed seeing her with another man, but again there was always a woman involved, which is something I really liked.

 

Flash forward a few decades and I’m not nearly as agile as I used to be. Our sex life has made adjustments along with the changes I’ve undergone and we’re quite happy. My best skills were always with my hands and mouth anyway! But the truth of the matter is that my days of giving my wife a deep, hard fucking are over.

 

And so, our conversations while we have sex have recently began to include another man. This is not a threesome scenario, I don’t join in nor do I get undressed. I’m there to watch her and when needed -- to hold her hand, to talk dirty in her ear.

 

In our fantasies, I usually partially undress her in front of the man. Exposing her, offering her to him. It’s all good stuff, gets us hot and we both come real good talking about it.

 

And so, how to take the next step? We thought about posting a personal ad here. We talked about looking to see if there were any off-premise clubs around that admitted single men. And we’ve talked about just going to a regular local bar in Brooklyn or Queens or Long Island.

 

For some reason, we’ve gotten it into our heads that we’d have better luck at a regular bar. There always seems to be a guy there on his own. We’re thinking if we make friendly and we hit it off, the suggestion of fucking my wife might go over really well.

 

We tested this theory a few weeks ago, before Christmas. We hit a bar in Sunnyside and ended up talking to this really young guy. For us, anything under 30 seems really young :-) He was a good looking guy, we were talking about music and movies. He wasn’t there to meet anyone, just blowing off steam on a Friday Night.

 

We had our opportunity – and we blew it. We hesitated and some friends of his came in and that was that. Lesson learned! While he was at the juke box, my wife and I had a few moments to see how we both felt and all systems were go. But I hesitated, just a few moments was all, and the opportunity was gone.

 

If we place a personal ad we know that isn’t likely to happen. We would all know what we were there for.

 

So, why our hesitation to place a personal ad?

 

I dunno. I used to think that it was because we wanted to retain as much control as possible? That maybe we felt like a regular guy going to the bar would be easier to navigate.

 

Now we’re not too sure. Now we are thinking we might be better off either placing an ad or looking for off-premise clubs or meeting places, if there are any.

 

Any thoughts are appreciated.

 

You didn't mention how old you are now, but as a single 52 year old that hasn't been with a woman in over 5 years I must ask is age an issue or do you have a specific age range you prefer. Also if you want to protect yourself and your wife I wouldn't suggest meeting someone at a bar and then immediately taking them home. It also sounds like you and you wife might prefer someone young and good looking and that is your preference but don't assume good looking equals a great experience. You want someone that can understand your situation and will respect both of you and any boundaries you set up.

[padoc 1,703]

Try bars in upscale hotels near the airport or in your case, find which of the mid-town hotels caters to business travelers. Get a room there, dress like you belong there, hang out in the lobby bar or in the restaurant bar or if there is a rooftop bar or piano bar try them. There are always guys in an unfamiliar city looking for a little conversation. Play it out a bit and watch as it begins to dawn on him that you might be interested in more than idle conversation. This approach does work!