What was your first step?

[MD0704BS 24]

After you realized you want to swing what was your first experience in the lifestyle ?

[njbm 2,871]

We went to Desire RM. We had a chocolate syrup episode with another couple. We blindfolded one naked wife and the other three licked chocolate syrup off her naked body. Then we blindfolded the other wife and did the same. We went through a lot of towels.

[Emt 91]

After you realized you want to swing what was your first experience in the lifestyle ?

 

Having an in-depth discussion with my wife about it. Have done it several times since then.

 

Next step will be checking out a club. This is just to jump right in and see what happens. Zero expectations of how far we'll get.

[Guest]

- Lots of research and reading.

- Talking to the girlfriend.

- Stupidly deciding that playing with a close friend would be safer / better, I'll never do that again!

[couplers 4,640]

After you realized you want to swing...

At the time I was single and unattached, it wasn't exactly a decision that I wanted to swing.

 

... what was your first experience in the lifestyle ?

 

In my early twenties, after I broke up with my fiance Red and moved out, I started dating another guy David (who is now my husband). After the second date I was incredibly horny, but he was too much of a gentleman to put any moves on me, so I went back and fucked Red. It was good, easy and so uncomplicated because we had been fucking for years before. The next date with David we ended up in bed and I stayed the night. After I left his place the next day, I got with Red again.

 

I kept Red up-to-date with what was going on and he was ok with it because he still loved me and wanted to keep getting in my pussy:). David figured out what I was up to (turns out he reads me perfectly), and to my amazement he said he was fine with it. So I started it, but David made it possible.

 

Fucking two guys who cared for me at the same time with both of them knowing made me self-confident and left me wanting as much sex as two guys put together. It led to me overcoming my jealousies and after two years letting the guys play with other women, me discoving my Lesbian side and playing with David's lovers, and having sex with three other different guys. Ten years later, Red, David, Lora, Clair and I are in a poly family.

[Fundamental Law 2,885]

Our answer is a bit different. We were born in the early 50's, grew up through the 60's, and so on. Like so many in our generation, we sensed that we didn't resonate well with several prevailing social norms--the prohibition against casual nudity, the prohibition against even mild public displays of affection, many double standards around sexuality, etc. Unlike so many in our generation, we didn't just "go through a rebellious phase" and then align with prevailing norms. Rather, we thought carefully about our values. Our first step into alternative lifestyles was via social nudism. With each successive step, we asked ourselves, "how does this next step fit with our values?" This has proven a durable approach--we are now together for 44+ years.

[Bluespruce1 706]

Went to a local swingers club and had our first same room sex experience.

[Guest]

We just happened to meet another couple that w staying at the same resort in Key West. Went out together a couple of evenings, strip clubs, roof top bar where the girls danced naked. A few weeks later, they wanted to meet, said she’s bi, he’s not. We turned them down, had never thought about swinging before, but talked about it and decided that we would both like to try it and MFM seemed to be an acceptable starting point. Nothing happened. 2 months later, the guy half of the couple texted us again, was in town on business, wanted to meet for drinks, ended up in an MFM. I think it was more our mind-set then his that got us there.

[Guest]

Swingers club. We went to watch and it seemed like a safe way to maybe cross a boundary. The watching thing lasted maybe 45 minutes. Ended up swapping with couples until 3AM. We have never looked back with any regrets.

[GoldCoCouple 4,065]

We set up a profile and started looking for another couple. Of course, we were in too big of a hurry and 'settled' on a couple that wasn't a great match, but it didn't do any harm and we all had fun (only same room sex and some minimal cross touching), but it opened the door and allowed us to both see that we were okay with what happened and we wanted to keep going.

[MD0704BS 24]

- Lots of research and reading.

- Talking to the girlfriend.

- Stupidly deciding that playing with a close friend would be safer / better, I'll never do that again!

 

So the friend thing backfired? We have read mixed reviews about inloving friend. Would you mind telling us what happened?

[GoldCoCouple 4,065]

Swinging with friends and dynamite...both are potentially explosive except dynamite has a necessary use.

[dazanconfsd 84]

Our first experience was with friends, it ended badly to say the least. After about 6 weeks of talking and figuring out what each of us wanted/expected from this we tried again with great success. We have a couple that we play with often and have become good friends, much better than the other way around.

[Numex 2,416]

Our foreplay included talking about our exes and what we liked. I told my wife since she had such great sex with two of them, she could try looking them up. She did; one was close by, the other in another state. She contacted both individually and each was eager to see her again. Since they had sex before, it didn't take long until she was fucking them again. We moved on from there.

[Bluespruce1 706]

we had a bad experience as well. all started out fine - she was with us one night. we ended up playing strip poker over a lot of cocktails. i ended up naked first and it was her first time doing anything like this. my wife watched while she explored my cock and eventually went down on me. she asked my wife if she could fuck me and of course she gave the green light. we actually had some amazing sex - we had been friends for a long time and we always had some sexual tension going on. i loved seeing her naked and really gave her my best. she climaxed a few times and i ended up releasing an awesome load inside her as we kissed deeply. it was awesome and we all remained very close for several week afterwards. she expressed interest in joining us with her boyfriend at our favorite swingers club. they were totally new to that scene but thought it would be fun to join us. after a night full of dancing and lots of groping and kissing we ended up in a room. we ended up simply engaged in same room sex. he was super charged up seeing my wife naked and riding my cock. she joined us and was kissing my wife and he started to give my wife oral while

she rode my cock. his penis was pretty small so she invited him to penetrate with me. he was totally into our cocks rubbing together as we shared her pussy. my wife climaxed pretty quickly so I pulled out of her so I could take care of our friend. he continued to pound away at my wife while his girlfriend mounted me. as he watched me penetrating his girl he came pretty quick inside my wife. his girlfriend nd i had fucked a few more times since our first encounter so I knew what she likes nd did my best to take care of her. we both came, cuddled nd all seemed well. a few days afterwards she informed us that they broke up - she said she couldn’t get the image of her boyfriend fucking my wife out of her head and let us know that we would have to pry ways as well. haven’t heard from her since. it’s hard to know how people will respond. i think for her it was more than just sex. we clearly had a connection and she simply couldn’t sort through the feelings of sharing me with my wife and then how her boyfriend fit into the picture. we have remained friends with him but have never hooked up since and he has moved on with a new wife. you just never know....

[Numex 2,416]

... a few days afterwards she informed us that they broke up - she said she couldn’t get the image of her boyfriend fucking my wife out of her head ....

For my wife and I, as well as the other couples who we play with, that's one of the best parts, seeing and thinking about our dearest screwing someone else. We compliment the couple when a pairing is particularly good. And don't discourage emotional connections.

[LaidBackFun 36]

We had new neighbors who introduced us to swinging. We eventually swapped partners and then a few months later attended a house party with their friends.

[MD0704BS 24]

It seems that everyone dove in head first. So let me rephrase the queation. How long after you decided to swing did you actually do something sexually related to Swining.

[padoc 1,703]

We talked about swinging for several weeks after a piece appeared on Eyewitness News (KYW-3 at the time) on a swingers club located on South Street in Philadelphia. Kama Sutra was the name of the place and we eventually got there before they were shut down by L&I. I started researching other clubs in Pa because we just wanted to go and maybe watch.

 

We found TJ's near Harrisburg and went the 1st time about 6 weeks after we'd seen that titillating news segment. We watched in awe as attractive woman who looked like our neighbors started losing clothing on the dance floor. We walked through the play areas often but were honestly too intimidated by the openness to actually do more than nod and smile at other couples. We finally found an open private room and boinked our asses off….twice and then again when we got home (at about 4:00 am). We went back the next weekend and then decided to visit a club a little closer to home. Thats when we discovered TPA in Cecil County MD about 40 miles south of home.

 

It was there that we started to meet other couples. Initially our rule was just watch, But as we relaxed a bit, we'd play together in a room with a window that would allow people to watch us. Later on, we'd go into a group room and stay off to one side but that's where the slippery slope started. People would touch us or we'd make contact with a couple next to us. That led to some petting and fondling but we didn't go any further. We met another new couple, 10 years younger than us that we chatted with over several Saturday nights which eventually led to sharing a room with 2 beds, then a room with 1 bed, then some soft swap. After that, it seemed to us that making out and oral was OK with both of us which led us to the Glory Hole room. That's another story, one we posted on this site (Glory Hole Surprise). Anyway, it took at least 6 months before we had more than incidental contact with anybody at the clubs. It was closer to a year before we actually swapped. We talked a lot and discarded rules as we both became comfortable with the idea of the next step and the one after that. It was quite a learning curve but we enjoyed every minute of it and we still talk about some of those early experiences.

 

That happened more than 15 years ago and we're still having fun with this hobby, we're still married and very happy with the choices and decisions we made back then. And we're still getting naked with friends. We'd still be going to clubs regularly but we just HATE the music. I guess that and the gray hair are indications that we're on the upper side of the swingers age curve

[Shore2Please 611]

After meeting a couple on a cruise we swapped spouses and cabins. We were in separate rooms.

[Numex 2,416]

Our foreplay included talking about our exes and what we liked. I told my wife since she had such great sex with two of them, she could try looking them up. She did; one was close by, the other in another state. She contacted both individually and each was eager to see her again. Since they had sex before, it didn't take long until she was fucking them again. We moved on from there.

 

It seems that everyone dove in head first. So let me rephrase the queation. How long after you decided to swing did you actually do something sexually related to Swining.

After I initially said that since they were so good you should try to look them up and screw them again, until she actually fucked again with the first guy that lives not too far away, was about three months. They got together twice before that for dinner to get reacquainted and did some kissing, touching (which afterwards made both my wife and I feel she should continue to go for it), but nothing that got either one off.

[MD0704BS 24]

After I initially said that since they were so good you should try to look them up and screw them again, until she actually fucked again with the first guy that lives not too far away, was about three months. They got together twice before that for dinner to get reacquainted and did some kissing, touching (which afterwards made both my wife and I feel she should continue to go for it), but nothing that got either one off.

 

Was it easier to start becuase your wife has already had sex with the men? Did you go on those two dates with her? Was there any emotional connection between these exes and your wife or was it just good sex?

[Numex 2,416]

Was it easier to start becuase your wife has already had sex with the men?

It was definitely easier for me, and easier to arrange and safer for my wife. Although I was 99% sure that having sex with another guy would be fun for her, and for me at a minimum would be neutral, it certainly wouldn't matter if she fucked a guy she already had sex with.

 

Did you go on those two dates with her?

No I did not, but she told him from as soon as the subject turned to sex that I was good with it. After they fucked twice we three got together. In hingsight, it was the right way to time it. Pretty much the same with the second, out of state guy.

 

 

Was there any emotional connection between these exes and your wife or was it just good sex?

They had parted on good terms, so there was an emotional connection, but they were exes for a reason. Just didn't see a longterm future together.

[Puisnboots 30]

I find this very interesting since I am at the beginning stages of something like this.

 

Boyfriend is talking to me about trying it with other couples. I worry about jealousy.

[dazanconfsd 84]

Jealousy is a possibility, and for me (the husband) it was there more at first before anything had happened at all. Our first time was with friends, bad idea. Luckily we were able to salvage the friendship and keep it at only that. After weeks of talking and adjusting we met a couple online, watching him with her was one of the hottest things ever for me. We both really enjoy watching each other. I am not yet okay with the idea of bringing in a single male to join us so we have nixed looking for a unicorn as well to make things even. We are only interested in couples for now and have a blast when we play. We have only been playing 5 months, so who knows what the future holds. Whatever that is, it will be us.

[Fitlakecouple 451]

I find this very interesting since I am at the beginning stages of something like this.

 

Boyfriend is talking to me about trying it with other couples. I worry about jealousy.

 

Lot's of stuff comes up like jealousy. Check out some of the podcasts available that explore those issues. Mr. and Mrs. Jones (We've Got a Thing) have an episode solely dedicated to the jealousy topic and their guest is a psychologist.

[MrandMrsA 76]

Check out some of the podcasts available that explore those issues. Mr. and Mrs. Jones (We've Got a Thing) have an episode solely dedicated to the jealousy topic and their guest is a psychologist.

 

Epidode 41.

Episode 54 it's also good about explaining "drama". The guest is Catherine, a licensed professional counselor and swinger.