Is it possible to get too close to a couple?

[Pdxcpl1 21]

My wife and I have recently met a couple who we really hit it off with both chemistry and compatibility all the way around. Our initial playtime was incredible and we've since met them again, which was equally as great. We discussed doing fun things together this summer and it really feels like the beginning of a great friendship. My wife asked me today if it were okay that she wants to keep talking to the other wife on a daily basis, or if that would be considered smothering. She's also trying to be mindful that she does not want this to go down an emotional love affair path. I know that is okay for some in the poly lifestyle, but we both agree we don't want to go down that road.

So, my question is, should we allow some time between our communication or is it better to just let it flow naturally?

[padoc 1,703]

Your concerns are valid but perhaps premature. Don't plan anything too far in advance and initially, I'd shy away from anything more than perhaps a half a day social 4-some. Let it flow and revisit your concerns with your wife in a week or two. These things sometimes burn very brightly at first and then just fizzle out on their own.

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

At first there is always NRE (new relationship energy). This will usually fade as time progresses, however, this is the very definition of FWB (friends with benefits). This is the very thing that we look for. I think what the problem is is that you are over thinking this. As long as the communication is good (meaning that they don't think you are talking too much) then what is the problem? Let them know that if this ever becomes the case, that they will let you know. Otherwise, have fun and enjoy your new 'special' friends.

[Pdxcpl1 21]

I agree, probably over thinking it. We are already making plans to have more fun this weekend and they set it up. I suppose while the NRE is there, we might as well enjoy our new FWB’s.

[M1F2KTJ 473]

My wife and I have recently met a couple who we really hit it off with both chemistry and compatibility all the way around. Our initial playtime was incredible and we've since met them again, which was equally as great. We discussed doing fun things together this summer and it really feels like the beginning of a great friendship.

 

So, my question is, should we allow some time between our communication or is it better to just let it flow naturally?

 

My opinion is to just let it flow. Communicate with them as you would with your other friends and family. Holding yourself back doesn't seem natural to me. Good, compatible playmates are something to value. Don't be afraid of a somewhat poly relationship.

[bbarnsworth 2,643]

There's different sides to this. Finding a couple where the attraction works all the way around in a really good way is sometimes hard. Playing a couple of times with them and then turning your back on them just when you've found the right couple seems...hard. Of course, the more you play with someone the more likely you will begin to develop feelings for them.

 

I'm with others above; there's a lot of NRE going on here, and you shouldn't over think it. I also wouldn't over press it. Just let it evolve on its own, and don't worry about it. Maybe you will develop some feelings of close friendship, but it doesn't have to be a full blown emotional love.

[LecrameMark 15]

I'll say sorry, but don't hook up on that, don't make plans, let everything flow the way it goes. Peace

[Numex 2,420]

... These things sometimes burn very brightly at first and then just fizzle out on their own.

True. And that's a big part of the fun. I have enjoyed my wife's passing infatuations.

[Numex 2,420]

.. . it doesn't have to be a full blown emotional love.

If there's some of that, so what? It has never lessened the love my wife and I have for each other.