Advice. First time going to club.

[certero 28]

Hi all. My wife and I have very recently opened up to each other about our interest in swinging. We have made plans to go to a club a couple of weeks from now to check things out. To be honest the idea of having sex in front of others in the play areas is a huge turn on for me and it seems like it is for my wife as well.Beyond that we are really unsure what the hell we are ready or not ready for but we're excited/nervous. Any advice would be appreciated. Thank You.

 

Married 18 years together for 20. Early mid 40's.

[NC_Seniors 518]

We just posted this on another thread for someone who was asking about going on a swingers cruise ... it’s probably applicable to you as well.

 

Our advice -- and you'll read it over and over on this board if you're here enough -- is to go with NO expectations other than to have a hot time together. If you wind up playing with another couple, that's great. But even if you don't, you can still have an incredibly sexy time with just the two of you, whether that means making out and groping each other on the dance floor, or watching other couples having sex, or putting on your own show in a playroom. We went to a club three times and a house party three times before we ever hooked up with anybody else on our seventh trip ... but on every one of those first six visits, we at least got a playroom to ourselves and had an incredible time with the lights low and the music thumping, knowing that people were walking by right outside the door (probably) wondering who was in that room and just what they were doing in there. So it's absolutely NOT necessary to swing to have a great experience at a swingers' event!

[certero 28]

We just posted this on another thread for someone who was asking about going on a swingers cruise ... it’s probably applicable to you as well.

 

Our advice -- and you'll read it over and over on this board if you're here enough -- is to go with NO expectations other than to have a hot time together. If you wind up playing with another couple, that's great. But even if you don't, you can still have an incredibly sexy time with just the two of you, whether that means making out and groping each other on the dance floor, or watching other couples having sex, or putting on your own show in a playroom. We went to a club three times and a house party three times before we ever hooked up with anybody else on our seventh trip ... but on every one of those first six visits, we at least got a playroom to ourselves and had an incredible time with the lights low and the music thumping, knowing that people were walking by right outside the door (probably) wondering who was in that room and just what they were doing in there. So it's absolutely NOT necessary to swing to have a great experience at a swingers' event!

 

Thanks NC.That's pretty much what we plan on doing. Its funny though. As nervous as we are and if you asked either one of us outright "are you ready for xyz" we would probably say no or I don't know. However I know me, AND I know how strong my wife's sexual energy as well even though she wasn't very experienced at all before she met me(hell we were both kids)I know she's got fire. I think she could have more freak in her than me and honestly that kind of scares me a bit..in a good way I guess.. LMAO

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

Go a bit early and let the people at the door know that this is your first visit. Usually they will have someone give you a tour of the place and maybe put you in touch with a regular to make sure that you are okay to start with. Of course, the no expectations thing. Go on a Saturday night. While it may seem easier to go on a less busy night, most nights are slow and can be clickish and some clubs will allow single men on Fridays and they can be...less than fun at times (extremely pushy). Go, have fun, and don't forget to report back here.

[OceanSummer 15]

My husband and I have been together 11 years and married 4, we are both early 30s and have kid. Lately we have been experiencing our sexual prime and being a little more adventurous (I'm a very timid girl) and the last week we have been looking into a club and arranged something for this weekend.

 

As I said I am quite timid and am very self conscious of my body making me a little nervous. In my head I know we will have a great time and it will be a wonderful bonding experience (and that you dont have to hook up with anyone else if you dont feel comfortable)

 

Any advice on how I can reassure myself everything is going to be peachy and get me out of my comfort zone?

[NC_Seniors 518]

Any advice on how I can reassure myself everything is going to be peachy and get me out of my comfort zone?

 

Not really ... at least not from us. Before our first club visit, we read on this board that the most difficult part is making it through the front door ... it’s true!! Once you get inside, you’ll find it’s really not intimidating. Just smile, look approachable, and most important of all, enjoy each other. (Caveat: don’t make your first visit on a night when they allow unescorted males.)

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

As I said I am quite timid and am very self conscious of my body making me a little nervous.

 

Going to a club is probably the best thing you can do for this. Sure, there MIGHT be a FEW 'prettier people' there. but most will be just like you...next door, average types. There will also be more than a few people that will make you say to yourself 'you really aren't that bad'. Remember, sexiness has nothing to do with how you look, it is something that comes from deep inside. That you are willing to go to a club already makes you very sexy. After you get back, try to tell me I'm wrong and try to tell me that you didn't have a great time and felt sexy. Go on, I dare you.

[certero 28]

Go a bit early and let the people at the door know that this is your first visit. Usually they will have someone give you a tour of the place and maybe put you in touch with a regular to make sure that you are okay to start with. Of course, the no expectations thing. Go on a Saturday night. While it may seem easier to go on a less busy night, most nights are slow and can be clickish and some clubs will allow single men on Fridays and they can be...less than fun at times (extremely pushy). Go, have fun, and don't forget to report back here.

 

Thanks Gold. Yes we have booked for a Saturday for the same reasons you mentioned. Its a club with a hotel, pool, nightclub. I will definitely report back! Thank You.