Are you first or second generation swingers ?

[Guest 15]

Were your parents swingers? If so did that influence your curiosity about the lifestyle?

 

Down the road if your adult children experiment with Swinging would it creep you out ?

 

Thoughts and comments?

[Numex 2,419]

Were your parents swingers? If so did that influence your curiosity about the lifestyle?..

Both my wife's and my parents, all four of them, did not swing - each one did it the old fashioned way and had multiple affairs. For me it was, and still is, strange the way it all took place. My parents weren't open about it because they both would try to cover for their cheating (going golfing when it was raining; visiting Aunt Kay who would call the house and know nothing about it). They didn't argue about the sexuality of the affairs, just that there was something more important to be done with the time. But they were still in love; we kids figured out that they didn't take weekend naps together because they were tired and the nighttime banging on the bedroom wall had nothing to do with "fixing the bed."

 

Down the road if your adult children experiment with

Swinging would it creep you out ?..

It would not, as a matter of fact we hope they do. We are convinced that some form of nonmonogamy is the way to a better relationship.

[Fundamental Law 2,885]

An interesting question.

 

My dad always preferred being nude but did not (to my knowledge) swing. After my mom divorced my dad and married my stepfather, there was some non-monogamy. It might have been consensual early, but did not stay that way, and she ultimately divorced him and did not remarry. She had a series of lovers, and they were informal as to how things worked.

 

Mrs FL and I have always been casual about nudity and matter-of-fact about sex. Our daughter grew up more or less without body shame until the teenage years hit, and remains comfortable with us being nude around the home. She knows about our 'special friends' and while she expresses no interest in consensual non-monogamy for play (she and her b/f of 3 years are monogamous), she is acutely aware that we remain happy and very much in love--and the same cannot be said for her other friends' parents who (by and large) have played the pretend-monogamy-cheat-rinse-and-repeat pattern. No, her swinging would not creep us out. Quite the opposite, if she and her b/f get married, we want them to find lives that will keep them growing together. If the LS is part of that, wonderful. As an aside, she has explored her bi side. That's 'on hold' for the moment, but could well re-emerge.

 

There is probably a heritable (genetic) component to exploring alternative life styles. There is probably a much greater experiential (environmental) component to embracing a different social norm. Looking back (the people at the movie theater now just look at us and issue senior tickets, no ID required )and looking around the world, we have come to understand that social norms come in two ways--imposed or agreed upon. Different societies and different cultures set up the social norms of nudity, sexuality and so on differently. Europeans are more open, Japanese are comfortable with nudity but far less so about sex, Scandinavians seem to be more comfortable with both, Americans equate nudity with sex and so on.

 

What matters --to us at least--are less the social norms and more the value norms. We have found that our values are much more likely to be shared among people we meet in the LS than people we meet in our vanilla lives. Nude is merely 'comfortable in our skins', sex is not weaponized, honesty is expected, discretion is reciprocated, communication is open, trust is foundational and so on. The LS is not utopia, of course, and issues will always arise and have to be resolved. The better question is what feels more "real" -- the vanilla world that is riddled with struggles for power, untruths, camouflage, and carnage? Or the LS world that is more or less free from envy, jealousy, dishonesty--and yet with a dose of carnality? We accept that the two worlds necessarily co-exist, and yet as we age into retirement, we are drawn further into the latter.

[Newandnaughty 3]

My parents sex life was none of my business. Mine and my wife’s sex life is none of our children’s business. Our children’s sex life, with them being adults, is none of our business. That being said, I don’t think there’s much our children could do that would creep us out.

[couplers 4,645]

My parents are about as conservative Catholic as one can be. I'm in a poly situation. My sister routinely says life with her husband is boring, then she "cheats" him (is it cheating if he knows it?), he forgives her and she says that life is once again exciting with her husband. Perhaps we got a recessive nonmonogamy gene from our parents, or maybe we're just rebelling, or need sexual excitement in our lives.

[Fundamental Law 2,885]

Were your parents swingers? If so did that influence your curiosity about the lifestyle?

 

Down the road if your adult children experiment with

Swinging would it creep you out ?

 

 

 

And your response to your queries?

[bbarnsworth 2,640]

My mom and dad divorced when I was quite young. I've no idea of anything about his sex life after that. I do know he cheated on my mother though. My mother had a few boyfriends here and there but never remarried. I seriously doubt she was ever involved in swinging in any respect.

 

My mother in law, however, though she would never say she was involved in swinging per se, did have sex with two men on a beach while her then husband watched.

 

My wife and I have been very open on sexual topics with our kids as they have gotten into their teenage years. We've not discussed swinging, but we have discussed non-monogamy in the context of "Sister Wives" and "My Five Wives" before. If our kids decide to get into swinging someday, it wouldn't creep us out. We hope they would come to us for advice. We've encouraged them to come to us for advice on anything, including sexual topics.

[PeterJ 948]

My mother in law, however, though she would never say she was involved in swinging per se, did have sex with two men on a beach while her then husband watched.

 

She might not identify as a swinger, but that was a pretty swingeresque incident.

 

For as long as it took her to do those two guys I’d say she and her husband were either honorary swingers or temporary hot-wifers.

[shy_couple 459]

His mom-NO

Her parents maybe BUT they likely started after we did.

 

When they retired a few years ago the moved to The Villages in Florida where there is a thriving senior swinger community.

 

Funny story, she was visiting her parents and a neighbor popped over. The neighbor was going to be watching the dog while they were away for a few days. The neighbor gave a strange business card that raised an eyebrow. Dad tried to hurriedly explain that these were contact or courtesy.cards exchanged between neighbors to contact in case of emergency. Yeah, right.

[Chris&Suzanne 204]

The neighborhood I grew up in had all new houses that were built for all the men that were discharged from WWII. The parents were young, and were having families. All the families had parties almost every weekend. No body had that much money so they had bar-b-ques, played poker, etc.

 

One night a friend of mine and I watched the adults, we were hiding behind a door (I think they thought we were asleep) play what they called under the blanket. One of the wife's would go under a blanket and the others would decide what piece of clothing they should hand out. Most of the time they choose some piece of underwear, and they would end up topless to totally nude. After a while the woman would think it was underwear, as usual, so they would had that out first, while still keeping other clothes on. So the people would start choosing outerwear. The person under the blanket would hand out underwear just to discover it was some other piece of clothing, so they ended up naked anyway. I don't think they were true swingers.

 

My wife's parents were swingers, and didn't hide it. Her daughter was also a swinger for a time. Not sure if she still is.

[ViSexual 1,008]

My parents were definitely not swingers of any sort. But my wife's mother and father just may have been.

 

My wife and two of her siblings are her father's and two other siblings aren't. Now one of those, her only sister, is denied by my wife and her sister. But my wife's father has told me that the sister isn't his. All were born while her parents were married. He also told me that there was one more sibling that was conceived by another man while he was deployed in the military and they gave that one up for adoption. My wife says he's not being truthful. But he went to his grave with those accusations.

 

Anyway, my wife's father gave us an old 8MM tape of when he and her mother were stationed in Germany. In it, there was a part of her parents and another couple partying in one of their private residences. The way they were switching dance partners, and just the atmosphere of the party, seemed clear that this was leading to a swap. It's not unlike our parties with other couples that led to swapping. And, the other husband had very dark, straight, hair just like my sister-in-law has. I've always felt it was my wife's father's way of proof.

[CB&DD 218]

2nd if not 3rd generation from what I've heard.

[padoc 1,703]

My wife's parents, absolutely zero chance. With my parents, I saw some things as a 10-15 year old that, with 20/20 hindsight, causes me to wonder about their "friends". They saw quite a bit of one couple who we all eventually referred to as Aunt and Uncle. Then that couple disappeared from our lives abruptly and completely. This pattern was repeated with 3 additional couples, the last one ended just after I went into the service. Everybody is long gone so I'll never know for sure but some of what I remember of that time is suspicious now.

[Guest 15]

And your response to your queries?

 

We are married 22 years and living together 28 years total. Second marriage for both of us. We both brought children into the marriage and had full custody. They are all in their thirties now.

 

I would say that my father was a swinger but it wasn't verified. My birth mom I'm not really sure , my step mom , yup pretty sure. They are all passed now so there isn't a way to ask them. The Mrs., her parents have been married 50 plus years and are still alive but no way I'm asking the question...lol I can say they have very good friends that live in the " villages " down in Florida tho.

 

We have two daughters , one is married and openly bi and dips her toes into the swinger pool with her husband. They lean more towards the poly side then the swinger LS side. They have been to a hedo resort with a girlfriend before. We have no problem with small talk on the subject , but both agree that details are ewwwwwwwwwww...lol

 

The other daughter is married too and thinks we are all just weird. She still loves us, but it just isn't her cup of tea.

 

Both don't get nudism and think that's creepy...to each their own, is what we say.

 

So to summarize, I am a 2nd generation swinger and Mrs. is a maybe 2nd generation...my daughter is a 3rd generation swinger.

 

We never cross paths at resorts or online. Actually we hardly ever talk about the subject other then on occasion to say we meet someone very interesting.

 

At this point being the year 2019, it's a given that some folks that had their kids young are bound to experience a second generation dipping their toes into the swinger pool. That was my train of thought when creating the thread.