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harryandmaria

Swinging sexual chemistry from online chat?

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Newbies here with one club experience under our belt.

 

As we venture online (More of a lurker now but going to get photos and a good bio up post Holidays) curious how easy and accurate gauging chemistry is from chat? Profiles and photos help but how soon can you tell from chatting online and seeing more pics that you’d like to meet? What’s your batting average of good chat to clicking/playing in person?

 

I’ve read other threads that state how hit and mostly miss the sites can be but we are excited to try them out. Especially because local clubs aren’t super close to us.

 

I’m also struck by how little effort some people put into the descriptions and photos. But figure it’s worth chatting with anyone who meets basic initial criteria. We have some dear friends from our nudist resort trips that we never would have picked initially as clicking with but we get along great. Thank you in advance for helping two newbies.

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It's almost impossible to find out if you have chemistry from an on-line profile. At most, you can tell that you might like to meet them. Messages add a little more, but still you won't know if you want them naked next to you until you meet in person.

 

Why? Well, it's way too easy to be somebody you're not on the Internet - but you should already know this.

 

If you're, as you say, clicking with somebody, meet them as soon as possible. Have hopes, but don't be surprised if you wind up disappointed.

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What Adam said is excellent advice. You can use chats, profiles and pics (hint: look at the background) to help in your selection process but especially early on, you'll kiss some frogs and be disappointed. Remember that you owe no one anything but basic courtesy.

 

We have a 20/20 rule between us. We know within 20 seconds to 20 minutes if we will EVER want to be naked with a couple. Only one of us has to invoke that rule and the game is over. Feel free to culturally appropriate our rule. Remember too, if swinging was easy, EVERYBODY would be doing it.

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how easy and accurate gauging chemistry is from chat?

 

Zero. The same is true about email and texting. This is why we have always wanted to meet another couple as quickly as possible once we connect. You will know more in 5 minutes than you would learn in 5 years of chat/text/email. If the connection isn't there, you usually know pretty quick once you meet in person.

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We agree that there is no way of knowing if there is chemistry there from online chatting, texting or emailing! We gauge interest in meeting someone based off their pictures which they will have to have for us to even talk to them and the info they have on the profile. If those things appeal to us and their is interest on their part as well we will plan to meet them in person somewhere public. As others have said we usually will know quickly if the chemistry and attraction is there to take it further. We no longer waste any time with people online that want to chat forever, kik, text or cam, because well it always ends up being a waste of time for us. Lots of talkers out there and not so many real time players.

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I find chat and email to be essential in presenting myself and in learning about the other parties. I look for literacy and as much chemistry as can be established online. The next step is the meet and greet, one hour only. A first date would be another time to give all parties the opportunity to withdraw.

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Online chatting is a good way to break the ice and do some initial connecting and vetting, but from my personal preferences, I agree that the real chemistry comes when meeting in person. You can often cover a lot of bases about compatibility and attitude from spending a good amount of time talking online first, and that makes the initial meeting much easier – or help decide that you shouldn’t meet after all.

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We meet people for vanilla drinks or dinner. We both probably know if we would be inclined to play with the other couple after talking for 5-10 minutes. But we rarely play at the first meeting, unless it is the only chance (one couple comes from far away or we are on a lifestyle vacation).

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