Keeping friends, end playing.

[njbm 2,871]

We are friends with a couple that we met through swinging. We like them. We like to go out to dinner with them, etc. But we don’t want to play with them. Is there a nice way to say this without losing our friendship?

[adamgunn 1,460]

Well, you're in a tough spot. The most honest way is to have a chat with them. "We've enjoyed out time together, we really like you, but we've decided that the bedroom isn't where we want to go anymore." IF they are cool with that, they'll remain your friends.

 

But they may feel upset by your decision, they may ask 'Why?' and it's possible that you'll wind up losing this friendship.

 

Best of luck.

[GoldCoCouple 4,066]

Talk to them. Just tell them something like you two are taking a step back from swinging but want to continue spending time with them. If you can't talk with people you are having sex with, you probably shouldn't be having sex with them.

[lnw 145]

First, you need to tell them. Making something up like "taking time off" will backfire when they run into you playing with others. They will ask again to play and you are back to square one. Adamgunn's approach is the best one. But also realize the just being friends is most likely not going to work out since the other couple will only think of "rejection" each time they see or get with you on a friendly type basis.

 

And don't lead on with sexy teases after you told them. We had a couple we really liked and played with a number of times (we were their first couple in fact). But they gave us the "we just want to be friends now" speech. We were glad they told us and respected that. But then, each time we would see them, he would go into a deep passionate kiss with my wife like nothing changed. I told her to not respond to that and not allow him that kind of kiss. Friends don't do that and they can't have it both ways.

 

We have moved on and you should too.