New Years Swinger Party at a vanilla hotel
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By JW6145
I’ve been lurking a while and read a ton here the boards. Now I’ve gotten myself into a situation that is not talked about very much on here. I’ve fallen in love with a playmate. I really didn’t mean for it to happen, and from what she tells me she didn’t mean for it to happen either. Let me start by saying I’ve been completely open and 100% honest with my wife, and my playmate Becca tells me that she has been mostly open with her husband. We’ll get to that in a bit.
Becca and I met at a club, just a few months ago. From the first I thought she was attractive, I mean let’s face it, we’re here to fuck attractive people, right? My wife, Angie, and I went to the club that night to have some fun. We’re experienced swingers-we don’t play alot, swinging does not rule our lives- but we’ve had our share of fun. The night I met Becca was no different; we hoped to meet some fun people, have some good to great sex, and maybe make some friends we could hang out with on a regular basis.
Becca and I both realized pretty quickly that there is a strong physical attraction between the two of us. The sex is effortless and I’ve never fit together with anyone better. After that first night of being together, my wife Angie and Becca’s husband Rob exchanged numbers. Becca asked for my number but I declined, telling her she could just text Angie if she wanted. I don’t normally like to have communication with the women I play with outside of swinging situations. I was not able to get Becca out of my head for the next several days- which is unusual for me. I threw caution to the wind sent her my number via SLS. She texted me a few hours later. Over the next several days we exchanged texts and even spoke on the phone a few times. All with Angie’s knowledge.
We all four got together again a few weeks later-and it was even better than the first time. It was that night that I recognized that I had developed emotional feelings for Becca, and I was pretty sure that she had developed similar feelings for me.
A few days after we were all together the second time I told my wife about my feelings for Becca. I told her I didn’t know if I was getting our sexual chemistry mixed up with emotion but I thought that could be the case. To my surprise Angie did not freak out. She told me she suspected something was up-given the amount of communication between Becca and I. I took a few weeks to sort out my feelings and spent many more hours talking to both Angie and Becca. I realized that I was probably in love with Becca. And I told them both so. Becca told me she feels the same way. This is not the “oh, I’ve just fucked someone new, I hope they like me best” kind of feeling. We’ve both been with other people since we met and it has not cooled our emotions. This is raw, real and deep.
When I told Angie all of this she gave me license to pursue a relationship with Becca and follow it wherever it may lead. I did not ask for this, Angie offered it to me. Angie is secure about our commitment to each other-I am not leaving my wife and Becca and Angie both know that. Becca also has no intention of leaving her husband.
Becca has talked with her husband Rob about us and the feelings we’ve developed for each other. What she has not told him is that she thinks loves me, she does not know how he would react to that (here is the mostly open part that I alluded to in the first paragraph). She has told him our feelings are deep but has not gone into how much we care for each other. Rob is completely comfortable with texts and calls throughout the day, but not with Becca and I meeting without him and Angie there-even for lunch or dinner. I completely understand and respect this. I don’t like it, but I respect it. I suspect if the shoe were on the other foot I would feel the same way. I really genuinely like Rob by the way, he treats both Becca and Angie really well-and he and Angie have really great sex together. Angie has told Rob that it’s just sex between the two of them and Rob feels the same way. They have no other feelings for each other past that.
Becca and I text every day and talk several times a week; I know about her life and children, and she knows about mine. We have similar interests and lives outside of swinging, we are in similar businesses. We have become emotional rocks for each other. I get emotional needs met from her that I do not get from Angie. Again, I have been upfront with Angie about all this and she is fine with it.
So here are my big questions: Do these things really ever work, or are we on the express train to Dramaville?
Is it possible to keep something like this going long term?
How do we navigate the fact that Rob is not comfortable with Becca and I meeting without him around (again, we will not be going against his wishes on this one) and knowing that he and Angie will want to have more variety in their swinging soon, which will leave less opportunity for Becca and I to be together?
Any thoughts from the wise sages on here are welcome. I’m a big boy-if I’ve being naïve about anything please tell me. I can take it.
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By older couple
I have been asked many times over the years when a nude person or persons are naked except for body paint covering their privates or their whole body, are they naked? I have been to Fremont's Solstice Parade, Key West Florida's Fantasy Fest, a lot of festivals all over the U.S. where in public places with large crowds of people all ages, people's nude bodies are covered in body paint. They say it's legal because technically they are not naked because their skin is covered. What do you fine folks say?
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By PeterJ
This definitely doesn’t fall under “best practices” for organizing lifestyle events:
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/08/27/nyregion/nycha-bronx-staff-sex-parties.html
“The litany of problems facing public housing residents in New York City — mold, lead paint, faulty boilers and leaky roofs — just got longer: claims of staff sex parties.
The entire 40-person staff of a housing development in the Bronx was reassigned over the weekend after residents complained that some workers had been drinking and having sex on the job.
Male and female supervisors at Throggs Neck Houses engaged in erotic activities with their subordinates for months — both inside and outside the buildings, said Monique Johnson, the president of the development’s resident association.”
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By SJBluebirds
It's considered a "Superspreader Event"
Seriously, I know we're all careful with protection from STI / STD's when we're out playing -- but holy cow, people! -- masks just aren't going to be enough.
Also, "Police".
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By Fundamental Law
While this is news, it is not particularly positive news.
Re: Jerry Falwell, Jr and his family, for example here:
https://www.reuters.com/investigates/special-report/usa-falwell-relationship/
Here are the first two paragraphs of the report:
WASHINGTON – In a claim likely to intensify the controversy surrounding one of the most influential figures in the American Christian conservative movement, a business partner of Jerry Falwell Jr has come forward to say he had a years-long sexual relationship involving Falwell’s wife and the evangelical leader.
Giancarlo Granda says he was 20 when he met Jerry and Becki Falwell while working as a pool attendant at the Fontainebleau Miami Beach hotel in March 2012. Starting that month and continuing into 2018, Granda told Reuters that the relationship involved him having sex with Becki Falwell while Jerry Falwell looked on.
Ignoring the political aspects of the timing of all of this, there are some takeaways.
1. Political leanings are irrelevant to biological drives, sexual fantasies, and the behaviors that follow.
2. The problems arise from the evident hypocrisies: preaching 'family values' (however defined) while practicing something beyond a standard of marital monogamous heterosexuality.
3. Institutions and groups that perpetuate such hypocrisies typically respond the same way, namely by denouncement and expulsion of the person(s) who have been "found out" and restatement of the institutional/group value.
4. There is a business dispute including accusations of extortion folded into all of this.
It is absurd to imagine that leaders are somehow immune from fantasies and the intentions to act on those fantasies. What would be more helpful are commonsense boundaries between public and private lives as well as reasonable display of integrity. Even then, humans find ways to accommodate 'sinful behaviors' while embracing integrity:
Rick: How can you close me up? On what grounds?
Captain Renault: I'm shocked, shocked to find that gambling is going on in here!
[a croupier hands Renault a pile of money]
Croupier: Your winnings, sir.
Captain Renault: [sotto voce] Oh, thank you very much.
[aloud]
Captain Renault: Everybody out at once!
Neither the evangelical community nor Mr. Falwell's employers should be "shocked, shocked" to find that (even) their annppointed spokesperson enjoyed variety in sexual expression, apparently with the knowledge and consent and participation of his wife of 34 years. Adopting the usual denouncement-and-expulsion-upon-being-found-out strategy ("Do as we say, not what he did!--He was weak and you must be strong!") merely reinforces the idealized pretense of purity. The reality is that tensions between sexual suppression and sexual expression are as old as civilization. While individuals and institutions can impose rules on themselves and set expectations for others, a bit of realism would be welcome: the aforementioned tensions cannot be "wished away". At the same time, business dealings with playmates might be predicted to end badly, as appears to have happened in this case.
The Reuters article concludes:
In a statement released Friday, before news of the relationship with Granda became public, Liberty University said its “decision whether or not to retain Falwell as president has not yet been made.” Its board of trustees, the statement read, “requested prayer and patience as they seek the Lord’s will and also seek additional information for assessment.”
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