Which of you started proposing to swing, husband or wife first?

[NewSw 37]

Certainly there is a partner of a couple who is starting to propose entering into a swingers , whether sharing or exchange, we would like you to share with us how the beginning and when was the date of the marriage, and how the partner was convinced of the proposal, is it the first time? and about what games?

[Guest]

Usually I find its the man who first suggests swinging.

 

Not always but most of the time.

[Nokidclub 18]

The adage is that the man introduces swinging, but it’s the woman who keeps them swinging.

[PSULioness 846]

I was the one to suggest and it was before we were married. He was against it at first.

[Guest]

The issue of swinging for us was raised by another couple who invited us to join them. We said no, primarily I said no in most part because it was specified that she was bi and he was not. Well, the bi part scared me, I had never done anything like that before. We gave them our answer in a very apologetic way and talked more about it between the two of us and kind of reached a point where we agreed that if we were ever going to do it, the best starting place would be with MFM. Eventually, the opportunity came up and we did.

[Numex 2,416]

We were talking about our exes. My wife said she really enjoyed fucking one guy in particular. I proposed that she look him up and have sex with him again. She did.

[GoldCoCouple 4,065]

It was the Ms. We were talking about all of our previous experience and she told the story about how her and her ex swapped with another couple (family friends) in their hot tub (hot tubs = gateway to swinging ). The marriage was too far gone and they had no communication when this happened (and the other husband fell 'in love' with Ms. Gold and would have left his wife if Ms. Gold had any interest)... this is why we don't recommend swinging with friends. The thing that surprised me out of all of this is she said that she didn't have a problem with swinging and would consider doing it again under the right circumstances. We talked a bunch more and here we are!

[NewSw 37]

In my opinion that when the wife starts talking about it then it is wonderful and exciting

[Erik13 157]

I showed my wife a scene from "Screw my wife please" and she was onboard immediately.

[Sunday 119]

Ours began as a pursuit of voyeurism - we wanted to be seen having sex. The fruits of our efforts in fitness, her dressing up, heels and being shaved and manicured, waxed etc, us believing we had exceptional skills, it just naturally needed to be witnessed by appreciative spectators.

 

Once we started going to clubs, things progressed from there.

 

[NWAtlSwing 522]

The boy friend! We were not yet married.

[Guest]

Never talked about it until after a visit to a Swingers Club. We were very active sexually and experimenting and exploring sexual adventures. We thought it would be fun to go to a strip club and when researching where to go that would be somewhat couples friendly, we stumbled upon the Trapeze Club in Florida. We went to just watch as a turn on and sexual diversion. My husband had me bent over in the big playroom and a couple approached us and asked if they could join us. Ended up screwing and swapping all night. After that we were hooked and started talking about how to meet couples and if we had any rules.

[NewSw 37]

so, boredom is not the only motivation to swing , but there are couples who talk about an agreement at the beginning of marriage, and perhaps before marriage too.

[Alura 2,774]

I'm not sure who brought up the subject of swinging. From our first date, we talked about "sexual adventures" both past and (hopefully) future.

 

Mrs. Alura was the first to say, "Darling, I've met a guy I'd like to fuck." She and I had more fun planning the encounter than she did fucking the fellow. That's when we decided couples would be our "fuck us".

[padoc 1,703]

I was NEVER sexually bored with Mrs Doc. She was beautiful, sexy, playful and adventuresome from the start. We gradually eased into this hobby from a sense of curiosity and a shared desire sexual adventure and variety. More than 15 years later we're still sharing all of that and more.

[NewSw 37]

I'm not sure who brought up the subject of swinging. From our first date, we talked about "sexual adventures" both past and (hopefully) future.

 

Mrs. Alura was the first to say, "Darling, I've met a guy I'd like to fuck." She and I had more fun planning the encounter than she did fucking the fellow. That's when we decided couples would be our "fuck us".

 

Wow , very nice

[NewSw 37]

I was NEVER sexually bored with Mrs Doc. She was beautiful, sexy, playful and adventuresome from the start. We gradually eased into this hobby from a sense of curiosity and a shared desire sexual adventure and variety. More than 15 years later we're still sharing all of that and more.

 

you are lucky man

[marla&brian 48]

After close to 30-years of marriage, Marla told about her past swinging experiences. I knew she had some fun back then but didn't realize how much ! Since finding this out I have brought up the thought of looking into it.....she has experience in the lifestyle I do not.

[EastInWest 1,524]

During sex, I mentioned a specific fantasy of watching her suck cock. A few days later she asked me as we pulled into the driveway after grocery shopping if I was serious and asked a couple of questions about it, then said she could probably get into that.

 

It took a couple years of talking for us to actually do it.

[couplers 4,639]

No one proposed it. We started with me breaking up with my ex-fiance and moving out, but still seeing him for sex because neither of us could let go. I met another guy, started screwing him as well. (It was a great feeling for me to have two men going at the same time.)

 

My new boyfriend quickly figured out what was going on and said he was fine with it. (It made me feel powerful having two men who knew about it and still wanted me.)

 

I introduced them. Eventually we started doing MFMs. (It was unbelievable that two guys could find me attractive in that way.)

 

My new boyfriend married me and had no objection to me still seeing my ex. (I never knew there could be such love.)

 

That's how it began, but there is more - me wanting hubby to have other women, me wanting to watch, finding my Lesbian side, forming a poly family, us having children...

[NewSw 37]

No one proposed it. We started with me breaking up with my ex-fiance and moving out, but still seeing him for sex because neither of us could let go. I met another guy, started screwing him as well. (It was a great feeling for me to have two men going at the same time.)

 

My new boyfriend quickly figured out what was going on and said he was fine with it. (It made me feel powerful having two men who knew about it and still wanted me.)

 

I introduced them. Eventually we started doing MFMs. (It was unbelievable that two guys could find me attractive in that way.)

 

My new boyfriend married me and had no objection to me still seeing my ex. (I never knew there could be such love.)

 

That's how it began, but there is more - me wanting hubby to have other women, me wanting to watch, finding my Lesbian side, forming a poly family, us having children...

 

very good couple ,

good luck

[NewSw 37]

After close to 30-years of marriage, Marla told about her past swinging experiences. I knew she had some fun back then but didn't realize how much ! Since finding this out I have brought up the thought of looking into it.....she has experience in the lifestyle I do not.

 

nice

[NewSw 37]

During sex, I mentioned a specific fantasy of watching her suck cock. A few days later she asked me as we pulled into the driveway after grocery shopping if I was serious and asked a couple of questions about it, then said she could probably get into that.

 

It took a couple years of talking for us to actually do it.

 

It was a good start, by telling her about the imagination of sex praise, but he told me whether you were intentionally hinting at her or you spoke spontaneously ?

[Chris&Suzanne 204]

We started talking about my wife's good looking friends and it just went to how we should try to be more friendly with them and maybe having sex with them, so I guess we both brought it up.

[kittyswinger 260]

My SO already knew I did swing as a single so we just agreed to try it together. That's when we started swinging as a cpl. I met my bf during one of our swings too. He proposed that he wants me to be his primary partner and that started our poly structure with SO. I was "mono" with him for a few years in that side of the relationship until he proposed we can swing occasionally to which I agreed. Our sexual lives (with SO and bf) are independent of each other.

[couplers 4,639]

... Our sexual lives (with SO and bf) are independent of each other.

Why is that? Do one of you insist on it?

 

One of the things that made me feel good about my self was the fact that not only did my husband and boyfriend (ex-fiance) meet and get along, they have sex with me together. Nothing has ever surpassed that as an ego boost, even my hard-earned professional achievements.

[kittyswinger 260]

@Couplers, my bf wanted me to be his primary gf and in return I asked him to be mono for me. In our negotiations, that was one of his request to make our sexual life private and independent to which I agreed. During that time we were experimenting on the non-hierarchical model of poly, until the relationship took on a life of its own.

 

I feel he wanted that so he won't feel being a secondary or a disposable 3rd wheel. I only refer to him as bf in this forum just to distinguish him from SO, who is the partner I live with. Though recently it is becoming more challenging. Bf is pushing that I share the time equally between them since he is integrating me more into his social and family circles.

[couplers 4,639]

@Couplers, my bf wanted me to be his primary gf and in return I asked him to be mono for me. In our negotiations, that was one of his request to make our sexual life private and independent to which I agreed. During that time we were experimenting on the non-hierarchical model of poly, until the relationship took on a life of its own..

Something similar for us. After breaking up with my ex-fiance Red while continuing to have sex with him, I met the man who would become my husband and started fucking him too. Both were good with it and both men were monogamous with me. Red, however, made a point of saying that he would always be faithful to me; not that I insisted on it, but whatever.

 

After a while I got hubby hooked up with several women, which opened me up to my Lesbian side, but Red stayed committed to monogamy with me (I flattered myself that I was meeting all of his sexual needs, which probably was true). One of the women, Clair, joined us and we felt like a family, not just a married woman with a bf. Clair got unexpectedly pregnant (by hubby) so I followed (going "potluck" with the two guys) and having children made us feel like a real family. We started swinging with Lora and her boyfriend (who became her husband), but Red was still monogamous with me. It wasn't until some time after Lora left her husband, moved in with us and joined our family and we had our second round of children together that Red gave up his fidelity and started having sex with Lora and Clair.

 

Funny how men are and that all was, but it's worked out.

[kittyswinger 260]

@Couplers, thanks. Btw, did Red father a child with you?

 

I'm firm with bf that if he wants us to have a child, he has to relocate near my house to make co-parenting arrangements easier.

[couplers 4,639]

@Couplers, thanks. Btw, did Red father a child with you?.

Yes, Red was the father of my second child. I was very deliberate and a bit strange limiting my sexual activities with hubby.

 

..I'm firm with bf that if he wants us to have a child, he has to relocate near my house to make co-parenting arrangements easier.

Absolutely. It is a harsh world and children need all of the support they can get financially, emotionally and physically. I would not even think of having a baby with a man who wouldn't be a committed father. The best thing about all of this is the way we adults are all parents to all of the children. I was particularly please when Red was happy and treated my first child as his own. Interestingly, the children also look at it that way. They know who their biological parents are, but are respectful to all five of us and seek support from each of us. The one difference is that Clair is our stay-at-home mom, which the children appreciate. And we appreciate by the other four of us giving her 1/5th of our earnings.

[kittyswinger 260]

Bf is committing but he just wants our relationship to be independent from that of SO. He wishes a separate family and I am now open to that. It can be done but it will be very difficult for me to bounce back and forth to 2 households when there is a baby. If he doesnt want to move in, I prefer he relocates near my place. When our child is at school age, then we'll see if the 2 households idea will work.

 

Yes, Red was the father of my second child. I was very deliberate and a bit strange limiting my sexual activities with hubby.

Most of my sexual activities now are with Bf. We swing too as a cpl on occasions. In contrast with SO who allowed me to swing on my own. But now, I lack the time for that. Unless someone Im attracted to in my immediate social circle will initiate for that, why not? :-)

[couplers 4,639]

... Most of my sexual activities now are with Bf. We swing too as a cpl on occasions. In contrast with SO who allowed me to swing on my own. But now, I lack the time for that.-)

With all that's going on for me with work and the kids, I'm glad that I can get at least one of the two men who loves me or our boyfriend to do me whenever the mood strikes. And having two females around as well for our mutual satisfaction makes our arrangement work.

[MrandMrsA 76]

We were monogamous for 30 years. Then stumbled across the show "Playboy Swing." It was a simultaneous interest after that.

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

For us, I (husband) had briefly been in a poly triad before meeting my wife. She knew about that, and thought it really wrong that my girlfriend was cheating on her husband. I patiently explained that she wasn't cheating, and I was friends with her husband, and everything was on the up and up. She still didn't like it, and was adamantly opposed to the idea. I never suggested it for us, I just shared it as part of what couples do; sharing their past.

 

Over the early years of our marriage, the subject of the poly triad I had been in came up every once in a blue moon. My now wife had always voiced objection to it. I would have bet every penny I ever earned that we would never have gotten into swinging or polyamory. It wasn't even a thought. I was quite content with things how they were, and being monogamous with my wife for the rest of my life.

 

Then, six years in, she surprised the hell out of me and mentioned in bed one evening something like "You know, I could see the advantage in having two men; both could massage me at the same time" (she absolutely loves massage; can't get enough of it). That started the ball rolling, and many months later after considerable discussion, lots of reading together, thoughts, scenarios considered, etc. we found ourselves at a swing club for the first time ever. The first few experiences weren't all that great. Not bad, just not great. Then, she had a lover who just made her toes curl, and she completely bought into non-monogamy then. That was 12 years ago now, and we're still here.

[NewSw 37]

she had a lover who just made her toes curl, and she completely bought into non-monogamy then. That was 12 years ago now, and we're still here.

 

nice ,

Was he a lover from a swing club or a friend of yours (her)?

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

nice , Was he a lover from a swing club or a friend of yours (her)?

 

Neither. We met him through another guy we'd met through SLS. She got to play with him a few times.

[RockNCpl 71]

I would say that I started it (Mr R), though unintentionally. One night, while we watching porn together, we came across a amateur gloryhole video. She thought the video was really hot and I asked her if she would ever want to try that. She asked if I would let her to which I said "as long as Im there". Then she said "I totally would!" Researching that lead me here...and here we are.

[cpl36996 91]

Wao! this was long time ago and it was me. Who brought it up to my wife as a night dream just to see how she would react to it and to my surprise she took it as a complement. From that time on I started being more specific on how I would love to see her do a close friend of ours, long story short one night we were listening music all three of us I brought up the subject to our friend of a threesome to see how he would grabbed the idea. He then began teasing my wife with innuendos and light touch she in turn like the situation when all of the sudden he grabbed her by the hand and proposed her to do a threesome. She smiled at him and without a word she leaded him to our room. I was without words but happy she took the lead. Once in our room both took off their clothes so fast like two little kids unwrapping a popsicle. That night i felt like in heaven I will never forget every detail.

[Chris&Suzanne 204]

We both began to talk about it while having sex one night. We mentioned who we that was hot and wondered if they would like to have sex with us. 

[NewSw 37]

On 3/3/2020 at 12:03 AM, Chris&Suzanne said:

We both began to talk about it while having sex one night. We mentioned who we that was hot and wondered if they would like to have sex with us. 

the start is always great during sex, women say a lot while ,

have you found a response from the people you talked about?

[NewSw 37]

On 2/4/2020 at 11:34 AM, Chris&Suzanne said:

We both began to talk about it while having sex one night. We mentioned who we that was hot and wondered if they would like to have sex with us.

so with her friends, then what about your friends?

didn't you invite your friend?

[Chris&Suzanne 204]

On 3/5/2020 at 10:25 AM, NewSw said:

the start is always great during sex, women say a lot while ,

have you found a response from the people you talked about?

 

 

 

Yes we did

[Guest]

We were still just dating when another couple approached us, stating she was bi, he was not.  We had both been married before but neither of us had really thought about swinging.  We said no to the offer, primarily because of the pronoucement that “she is bi” in the announcement suggesting whatever we did would be about that. My BF, now husband, he indicated that more than willing to play with the female half, she was very abundantly endowed, and I indicated that I was more than willing to play in whatever fashion with the male half of the couple, would even gladly do he and BF both.  Well, my bf jumped on that right away and we decided that if we were ever going to swing, our starting poAint would be MFM.  About 2 months later, the male half of that couple came to town on business, wanted to meet for drinks and, I guess not surprisingly, it ended in MFM.  Two or three months he was back in town and we had another but in between we had already had 3 or 4 others because I so enjoyed them.

[JessicaJamison 861]

So we have been married for 12 years.  5 years ago while discussing a fantasy my husband asked me to be a Hotwife.  I travel for work and he always imagined while I was traveling I was also cheating on him.  This is partially because when we met and through the first two years of marriage I was a stripper, I was a pretty sexual person in my teens and twenties.  I have maintained a flirty personality.  So he just imagined all kinds of scenarios.  None of which were actually happening.  I originally thought he wanted to role play a cheating fantasy so I tried that, acted like he wasn't my husband.  It went well, but at the end he was even more eager for me to start cheating on him.  I was absolutely Pissed Off at him.  I felt rejected and felt like he was saying I wasn't enough, which hurt cause I work damn hard to keep sex interesting for him, planning his role play requests for days sometimes to make sure he had fun.  While I was pissed at him I ran into a guy I had a real crush on, and then I realized I had been given permission to fuck him.  So I did, my husband took it well, it was exactly what he wanted so I kept fucking my Yogi, named Michael.  Then I branched out and started picking up guys in hotel bars as I traveled.  My husband loved it.  Two years into the hotwife lifestyle, I recommended we do a full swap with a couple I had met that was into swinging.  He agreed so we set our rules and have been swinging ever since.  

[Playman64 205]

I introduced Kim into the LS, I met both Dianne & Debbie in the LS. 

[Funmom 45]

My husband was the one who suggested it . I was very against it at first but now I'm his slut and love it