New and need help.

[wildrebty420 2]

hello my sexy friends!

We are a young couple in our mid 20s from just north of Toronto . we are struggling to find the right person or couple to start off with. 

We are on swingtown primarily 

But just got on swinging lifestyles as some gifted anomoynes year membership.

We have chated with a few couples and few we find quite attractive.

 

So our  questions are:

1)as Canadians what site do you us primarily.

2) how do you know if it's a couple that is no longer together?

 

[SW_PA_Couple 4,024]

I will not be able to answer you questions about the state-of-swing in Ontario, but I will welcome you warmly to Swingersboard. 

[wildrebty420 2]

thanks  for taking the time to reply. we apricatie your time. and thanks for the honest answer

 

Reba 

[adamgunn 1,460]

As to your second question, it would depend on how much interaction you've had with the couple. 

 

If you've met them in person, you should have a good feeling for that. What is your gut reaction?

If not, assume they are a couple that is together until they give you a reason to doubt them.

 

I look forward to hearing more of your query about this couple, and welcome to the board.

[njbm 2,871]

Welcome aboard! We were in Toronto a few years ago. There were many swingers’ clubs. We went to one called X, another called something with a 40 in it. We did not attend another one in the city called Oasis. 
 

This may be a tough time to start, but when the coast is clear after the pandemic, you may want to visit a club. Keep in mind that you can just watch or play with each other, but that’s how we started when we didn’t know anyone. 
 

Two avuncular tips: use condoms, get HPV vaccine. 

[Idahocouple6969 294]

We would highly recommend finding a local meet and greet. We have made some good friends.......with benefits through our local group. Even ultra conservative small towns you will be surprised how many like minded people there are. It does take a bit more work but it's worth it. Welcome to the board ?

[padoc 1,703]

Our first experiences occurred at swinger clubs in Pennsylvania in 2003 so we highly recommend that method. Question #2 is a bit more difficult.  If you're talking about a profile on a website, read the profile closely.  If it speaks primarily to what he wants or uses "I" rather than "we" in sentences,  and  if there are little or no references to the females wants, needs, or skills. you probably have a single guy or a cheater. Look also at the validations if any and how they're worded and the dates of validation.  If there is no mention in the more recent ones of the female half, there is no female half. Also look closely at the pictures. Is there a woman featured? Is it the same woman? If not, or if there are only 2-3 pics of him or his boat or motorcycle or car, its a single guy or a cheater. If you agree to meet a couple and only a guy shows up with some lame excuse, don't bother to listen, just leave.

 

SLS has a lot of Canadian members and so does SDC. We know because we've met quite a few through both sites who winter or vacation in Florida where we now live.  Understand, swinger sites do reflect the general population, there are flakes, fakes, liars and cheats everywhere but there are also many, many attractive,  wonderful, playful and loving couples who want to share all of that with others.  The selection process is the difficult part in finding playmates and early on, we had some disappointing interactions, but as we have refined our process, we found way more real and playful couples than not. You'll learn from each experience. Talk about it afterwards, almost debrief one another to determine what you liked, what you didn't and then make adjustments to your search and selection process to reflect what you two just learned. It gets easier with each experience.  

 

Oh, and trust your gut!! You don't owe anybody anything other than initial courtesy. Mrs Doc and I agreed after a bad experience in our first year that, if at any time, one or the other of us had a negative gut reaction, we leave immediately, no questions asked  and no explanation other than, "Im sorry. I don't think this is working for US".  Don't get distracted by the idea of strange sex or how attractive one or the other in the couple is to one of you (Mrs Doc called it "boob blindness") you'll probably never see those people again and your relationship should always be THE priority.

[padoc 1,703]

Oh, and by the way! We are envious of you!! We started swinging in our 40's and have always wished we had discovered recreational sex 20 years before we did!

[couplers 4,641]

On 5/16/2020 at 8:26 AM, padoc said:

... We started swinging in our 40's and have always wished we had discovered recreational sex 20 years before we did!

As I sit here taking a break from working at home surrounded by my lovers and all the crazy children we have spawned, every day I am thankful that in our early twenties, the man who would become my husband so unselfishly let me keep my ex-fiance as a boyfriend, expressing joy in me sharing my body and my love.  It took me a couple of years to be able to reciprocate, but the family that formed from us continuing to date others together after marriage is something that would not have happened had we merely started "recreational sex" in our forties.  What I never imagined was having sex and falling in love with other women, having a bond that grew tighter as we had children together with the same men.