Swinging with kids in the house?

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

This question applies both to those who have kids or don't.

 

If you have kids, do you swing with your kids in the house? Or do you go elsewhere or at least make sure they aren't home?

 

Whether or not you have kids, what are your feelings towards the idea of parents who swing, swinging with kids in the house? How would you feel if you were at someone's home to play and knew there kids were just upstairs or in the next bedroom?

[ILcouple 15]

I would have to say we prefer the no kids in the house period approach unless of course they are not able to walk yet. Then I would feel a little more comfy and willing to play but with children in the house it does run its risks and try explaining to them why mommy and/or daddy is doing those things to that person is a topic I'm sure most who have children do not want to explain. You know how kids in the school yard say my mommy and daddy did this or did that, and then having your child pipe up OH yeah, well my mommy and daddy was doing...

 

Reminds me of the show "Kids Say The Darndest Things" or the new commercial ad I have seen where the child answers the phone and tells the caller that mommy is in the shower and then adds that daddy is there also. Hmmmmmm, add a little twist about walking in on mommy and daddy with a few strangers and you have yourself a visit from counselors, etc. lol

 

So no, not going to contribute to that. There is my 2 cents.

[PA_RACERS 17]

We have a had a threesome a couple of times while our kids were sleeping. But our kids knew this guy and he comes to house on a regular basis. It was nothing new for our kids to wake up and find him crashed on our couch. But We would not do anything with any other person or couple while the kids were home. We keep our swinging friends apart from our children. And if I went to somone house an their kids were there we would leave. I think there are somethings that children should never be exposed to. We were just lucky that our kids are heavy sleepers. I honestly don't think we will ever do anything with them home again.

[TNT 1,155]

We never play while our kids are in the house. We have had one person come over, but our kids were all gone for the night and were not expected home until the next afternoon. We do our playing usually in a hotel room. To us, it's just safer that way for all concerned.

 

I don't think I would be comfortable while my kids or anyone elses were in the house.

[ciscosv 26]

That is an interesting question. My wife and I do not have kids that we know of yet. We would be uncomfortable if there were kids in the place and therefore would not participate in any "sexual swinging" activity. Hanging out and playing cards or something non sexual would be fine.

[CanadianCouple 18]

Our two kids are both grown and out of the house, but under no circumstances would we ever play with others while they're under the same roof. Just us.

[ken -N- lea 15]

We make sure that the kids are not around when we play. They are at a sitters. We have several couples that we are friends with that we also play with. If they come over when the kids are home, nothing sexual happens. We don't even swear when the kids are around and awake. Well...ok...there was that one time, but when one cuts their thumb open with a knife, one should swear a little.

[Alura 2,774]

Generally we arrange for the kids to overnight with their grandparents, forty miles away, when we play. Well, okay, one beautiful summer night we were playing cards with some playmates when a moonlight swim was suggested. We checked, found the kids were asleep upstairs and gave in to the temptation. Fortunately, the children slept through it. The pool is secluded, can't be seen from the kids' windows or by neighbors and we were very quiet so there probably wasn't much danger of "being caught." Still, the danger was there and neither of us was really comfortable. Later we discussed what had happened and decided not to repeat the experience. We're not big risk junkies.

Alura

[Trish 15]

I think it is actually sort of a turn-on to do it while the kids are asleep, the risk of being caught makes it so naughty, lol...

 

The only time we've done it while the kids (who are 2 and 7) were awake was the time we did an impromptu 3some with the lawn guy, which is a loooooong story, lol.

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

Originally posted by Trish:

I think its actually sort of a turn-on to do it while the kids are asleep, the risk of being caught makes it so naughty,lol.....

And what if you are caught? How do you explain that to your kids? Aren't your kids more important than getting an extra rush over the fact that they might catch you?

[invictus 45]

Never at home!! Some kids wake up, some kids drop in from ther own house, some kids who still live at home drop in to pick up something.

 

We have occasionally "skinny dipped" in the pool with other couples, but we feel we could explain that as good clean fun. It is on a much different level than explaining why 4 poeple were all locked in our bedroom and took several minutes to open the door...

 

The lifestyle is a blast but not something to explain to kids. Do not open that "can of worms" with them.

 

In our ever so humble opinion.....

[Flori_DAMAN 26]

My 8 kids range from 3-23. From old stories from the older ones we have never done anything that hey were not at least pretty surely aware of. They don't tell you until you are older but they are smarter and much more observant than you think.

 

We never do any playing with others at home and would never consider it. But things like caller ID, where ya going? Why does mom have her negligee and your boxers in that bag in the back seat next day? Also, private conversations are quite often heard between walls, through furnace ducts, and just plain forgetting who is in the house. Be prepared to be caught whether you swing at home or not. Kids are just little people but have huge curiosities about what parents do.

 

Kids ability to perceive is terribly underestimated I have found.

[invictus 45]

"Kids ability to perceive is terribly underestimated I have found"-michigancouple

 

Well said!!

 

We have kids with an age range not much smaller than yours and have had the same type of "feedback". Our 17 year old stumbled into this site when one of us forgot to clear the history and has had many questions since then. "We got there by accident" does not really satisfy the curiosity of a young intelligent mind.

 

As we said in our first post on this topic....

 

NEVER AT HOME!!!

 

While we are talking about kids I will stay "on my soap box" and offer another opinion. Often at nudist resorts we will see kids with parents who are into "family naturism". This makes both of us very uncomfortable. Kids should be raised "middle of the road" and left to explore their own boundaries as adults. Too much religion, too much sex, too much whatever should not be taught to children. "Middle of the road" should be the example and they can "swerve" on their own from there as adults, with a well balanced upbringing.

[MiCpl 55]

While we don't have kids, we have been guilty of swinging with other couples who do while their kids are home. It's definatley not something we are remotely comfortable with and in most cases we do avoid it. The one occasion that comes to mind was a night when we had all been out together and came home quite late after their kids had long since been asleep. The way their house is set up also helps a bit since there are two doors to go through before accessing their bedroom (which could be locked) - but we would have been able to hear a knock had one of the kids needed anything (and we would have been able to hide I suppose). All in all I think these kids know way more than their parents give them credit for. They are quite open around them and assume that the kids don't "get it". Which also makes us a bit uncomfortable.

[jcbicouple 24]

We don't entertain at home, and most of our experiences have been at hotels or a club. We have met people at their home before, but no way we would play if there were kids in the house. Having kids walk in on their own parents can be traumatic enough, let alone explaining why mommy and daddy were doing that with someone else.

[EternallySingle 32]

Wouldn't even think about it. If I knew kids were at home I'd leave. This has actually been a problem in "straight" dating as well. I have a hard time bringing myself to have sex with a woman if her kids are home, especially if I haven't met them. The thought of a seven or eight year old waking up from a nightmare to find me in bed with his or her mother is almost stomach turning to me.

 

I won't lie and say I haven't done it, but several times I've woken up the next morning and some kid's at the end of the bed saying "Who are you?" or "You're taller than mommy's last boyfriend". Thats not a good feeling to have and I can just imagine what would be going through a kid's mind if they caught two or more people with mommy and daddy. Try keeping them from talking about that at school, or keeping child protective services from deciding the parents were unfit.

[J&T Indiana 31]

Originally posted by Trish

I think its actually sort of a turn-on to do it while the kids are asleep, the risk of being caught makes it so naughty,lol.....

 

The only time we've done it while the kids (who are 2 and 7) were awake was the time we did an impromptu 3some with the lawn guy, which is a loooooong story,lol.

 

Ok, I'm sorry but that's just SICK. If you are turned on by the fact that a CHILD could be HEARING or SEEING you in a sexual encounter, then you need to see counseling and FAST. Especially if it's with someone other than your spouse!

 

As for us, we never swing in ANYONE'S home, only at the clubs. But if we did swing at home, NEVER EVER EVER with kids around.

 

Plus if there's kids sleeping or in the other room, you can let go and have FUN. Based on the loudness coming from the rooms at our club, contantly, all night, I can't see how you CAN'T wake the kids up.

 

I know my wife and I have a hard time keeping quiet on our own!

[bccpl77 15]

We would rather not have any kids around. We've always arranged for an overnight sitter for our daughter. Once we had an encounter at a couples house with their kids there because they were only able to get a sitter for the evening and not overnight. We went out for drinks until the kids were in bed then we played in the basement. It still felt wrong and nevermind the fact that we couldn't let loose and make noise. We felt like we had to be sooo quiet. Needless to say, dates off if no sitter. It's not worth it if you can't just enjoy yourself.

[WesternSwing 504]

No way would we play with kids in the house. And we don't play at our house anyway. But then again, we always have kids there so it isn't even an option.

 

For us, part of swinging is getting away from the kids and everyday life to be with adults for fantasy fun for just a little while.

 

But most of all I'd be terrified that a kid would get up for a drink of water or something and BAM! there we are in all our naked glory, mommy and daddy (in either couple) not with mommy and daddy...

 

Mr. WS

[omneesx 15]

Our personal experience has been quite the opposite of what's been described here so far. The couple we knew that have kids first of all introduced us to them before we went out for our first dinner together. The kids were 2 and 4 at the time. They left them with a sitter. Afterwards, the kids were asleep when we returned from the restaurant, the sitter was escorted home and we had a wonderful sexy evening from our end not acutely aware that the kids were in another room. When we asked, the couple assured us that the kids tend to resist bedtime but ended up sleeping soundly and whatever noise we made behind a closed door would not bother them. These two toddlers never made surprise exits from their room after bedtime or gave us cause to wonder if they could hear. Something else we should point out is that our relationship with this family was enjoyed on other levels aside from swinging. We saw no ill effects on the children or on any of our return visits and were suprised to find that the kids enjoyed our company and would ask their parents when our next visit was.

 

To address the fantasy aspect of swinging, this has never been one of our goals. Rather the focus has been to enjoy really nice, open-minded, sensual people without the limitation of monogamy. For us swinging is not an escape from anything.

 

Our biggest concern is that most people feel that with or without "getting caught" by children, the activity in their presence is wrong. Is this a projection of the idea that at one time, their parents were swinging in the other room without their knowledge or that swinging will somehow damage the children, or more simply, they themselves feel swinging is bad?

 

We do not feel that swinging or the sight of sex in itself damages children. The damage comes from a misrepresentation of sex by their caregiver. Children do not develop sexual dysfunction, it must be taught to them somehow. Through inaction, lack of information, over-reaction, wrong information or any combination of these.

 

We'd like anyone who feels differently to explain.

 

A & L

[WesternSwing 504]

Our biggest concern is that most people feel that with or without "getting caught" by children, the activity in their presence is wrong. Is this a projection of the idea that at one time, their parents were swinging in the other room without their knowledge or that swinging will somehow damage the children, or more simply, they themselves feel swinging is bad?

 

We do not feel that swinging or the sight of sex in itself damages children. The damage comes from a misrepresentation of sex by their caregiver. Children do not develop sexual dysfunction, it must be taught to them somehow. Through inaction, lack of information, over-reaction, wrong information or any combination of these.

 

We'd like anyone who feels differently to explain.

 

A & L

 

My wife and I have never really been concerned about getting caught together by the kids. Of course we lock our bedroom door to prevent it, but our two oldest are old enough to know what is going on (we have a early teen, a pre-teen, and a toddler, all girls) and that we have sex and it is enjoyable for us. We are very affectionate around them, always kissing and touching. We share long drawn-out kisses in front of them. The oldest tells us to "get a room".

 

We've had "the talk" with the oldest which included that there is nothing dirty about sex, but she should wait until SHE is ready, and preferably out of high school, and ALWAYS use protection. We don't expect she will wait until after high school (neither of us made it to our senior year as virgins), but we hope she will.

 

Even the pre-teen has known for years the mechanics of how babies get here. Our kids know that they can ask us ANYTHING and we won't lie to them.

 

A toddler won't understand, or even remember tomorrow, if they saw mommy and daddy, so it's not a big deal. But older kids do. It's one thing for a 10-year old to tell their friends they saw mommy and daddy doing it, BUT quite another to be telling the neighborhood about mommy and daddy doing it with other people, if you get my drift. In fact our pre-teen's best friend's parents recently separated and she walked in on mom with another man just last week. IT IS all over the neighborhood. And although my wife and I don't care, there are those that do. Society dictates that some activities are better kept under the radar.

 

Mr. WS

[HotCoupleGnS 21]

Well we have played with our kids in the house before. Of course they were asleep & the people we played with were also friends. Our kids are 1 & 3 now, but they were even younger then. So, they were both in cribs. I didn't see much of a problem with that b/c there is no way to get caught then. We would even play now with our kids in the house with someone we knew & were comfortable with. The 3 yr old is a regular bed, but when he finally passes out around 10, there is no way to wake him up until like 9 in the morning!

 

But as soon as our kids are old enough to know what is going on, we would never do it!

[NewTemptations 54]

Never ever with kids in the house...ours or someone elses, sleeping or otherwise!

 

The only time we have ever made an exception to this rule...we have friends that host an occasional party. They have an 18 month old baby. The party starts well after the baby has gone to sleep, and they get a friend to stay in the room with the sleeping baby. All baby supplies, bottles, diapers etc are in that room so that should the child wake up all is handled. During the course of the evening no one ever sees the baby or the person there to care for the baby. I would imagine that this plan will not continue to work for them once the child gets older and they will start making alternative plans for child care at that time.

 

Laura

[2neophytes 16]

We do not feel that swinging or the sight of sex in itself damages children. The damage comes from a misrepresentation of sex by their caregiver. Children do not develop sexual dysfunction, it must be taught to them somehow. Through inaction, lack of information, over-reaction, wrong information or any combination of these.

 

A & L

 

Well said!

[2neophytes 16]

Now that I've finished reading this thread, I can say something more!

 

Obviously no one wants their kids to catch them in the act. But what I wonder is what's the difference between being caught together (you and your spouse) and being caught with another person or couple?

 

I guess things on the West coast are different. There are many polyamourous families, in which parents openly share affection with others outside the primary relationship. I have friends who have grown up in environments such as these, and sex, swinging, or any alternative sexualities are non-issues. Sex is a fundamental drive, like eating, sleeping, and using the restroom. If the drive is repressed within a society, that society will face problems.

 

I would much rather my kids watch a graphic love scene than some of the prime time violence. Our kids watched Rocky Horror with us the other day. But then issues of gender and sexuality are non-issues.

 

I don't know if any of you guys have ever read Kurt Vonnegut, but there is a scene in one of his books (I think it's Cat's Cradle) at the porn house. What's funny is that at the porn house, the film was a close up of someone easting an apple! Eating fresh fruit was pornographic!

 

So as far as swinging with the kids around, we've done it, and we don't like the idea just because we're usually in the living room. It's hard to focus when you know you're out in the open. But we're the same way when it's just us. Sometimes we get a wild hair and my partner wants to eat me on the kitchen table, and the kids will be next door playing. They could come in any minute. So it's no different than that for us, really. I just don't like feeling vulnerable. I mean, I don't like the kids bothering me when I'm using the bathroom either, so I close the door.

 

Well that's my 2 cents. I'm sure I'll think of something else after I've logged off.

[Alura 2,774]

One evening Mrs. Alura and I were in our bedroom. She was a bit tense after a hard day and I was giving her a full massage, as I often do. I started with a face massage, which she really enjoys, sitting a-straddle of her body. Of course, both of us were nude. Dimmed lights were on.

 

Twelve walked into the room and abruptly asked, "Oh, Oh! Did I come in at a bad time?"

 

"No, not at all, Twelve. I'm just giving Mom a face massage. What do you need?" I asked him.

 

"I left my book in here earlier. Is it okay to get it?"

 

"Sure," I said, continuing to massage Mrs. Alura's face.

 

The book, of course, was on the bedside table, about two feet from Mrs. Alura's head. Twelve picked it up, turned and left saying, "Thanks, Mom & Dad. Sorry to interrupt."

 

"No problem, Son. Anytime!

 

We continued with the massage. Now, if he'd come in later...

 

Mr. Alura

[519Couple 15]

I guess I'm the first person to post here who has been on the other end - when I was a child, I remember one Saturday afternoon when my parents locked themselves in their bedroom with a porn movie and the parents of a school mate of mine. I don't remember what they told me they were doing (although I'm sure the explaination wasn't that they were swinging), but I recall feeling pretty yucky about it.

 

Based on that experience, swinging while our son is at home (or our partner's children are home) is *way* off-limits for us.

[miacpl30 18]

We will have a couple over for drinks/dinner, but we just don't feel right having any real fun with small kids in the house, even though they may be sleeping.

[xxoticangel 99]

We have, but it has only happened a couple of times and always with the same couple. We were friends with them long before we started swinging with them and the kids were used to seeing us all sprawled out on the livingroom floor or the parents super king bed.

I guess I'm the first person to post here who has been on the other end - when I was a child, I remember one Saturday afternoon when my parents locked themselves in their bedroom with a porn movie and the parents of a school mate of mine. I don't remember what they told me they were doing (although I'm sure the explaination wasn't that they were swinging), but I recall feeling pretty yucky about it

My $0.02 here. I grew up with swinging parents, I had an "Uncle Bill" that would visit on a regular basis to "help" with things, sometimes my father was there sometimes not he would sleep in my parents bed just like any friend. We vacationed with people and the kids had one room while the adults had another. This continued until I was 15 or so and I never caught on. There were lots of clues that I recognize now that I'm an adult but I'm just glad my parents had a healthy sexual attitude and I am able to enjoy a lot of things that a lot of people grew up thinking are "bad".

[schafergroup 15]

As a couple with three boys, 15, 10, 6 and a small house, I can definetely agree with many of the posts here. We are very open with our boys and they can ask us anything and we will always be straight with them and let them find their way in the world with guidance. Since we are so new to this we have never had any experiences that we have had to be concerned about, but for the wife and I, we would never ever do something that would make us nervous about having children in the house at the same time. best to do it at a club or an offsite location if you have children.

[BiloxiCouple 695]

2neophytes:

Obviously no one wants their kids to catch them in the act. But what I wonder is what's the difference between being caught together (you and your spouse) and being caught with another person or couple?

 

That's the way we feel. We have brought partners over while the teenagers slept. And let our new friends know that up front before they come over. Our kids also know (to a point) what we do. They don't wear our swinger t-shirts (which is another funny story). But one of them likes the Miss No Swimsuit t-shirt from Hedo.

[akamgaxoxo 25]

We have had our friend over while our child was home. Actually this was the first time he was able to meet our kid, so that was kinda cool. Though before hand I totally made sure if he was fine with meeting our child and knowing that he would be there and may wake up. HOWEVER our child is very young still and is in a crib and though they may wake up, they won't get outta bed and walk in on us either. Such a scary thought!

 

I would like to have an open and honest relationship with my child in the future about sex, but I still don't think I would feel comfortable with discussing swinging with him either!

 

That being said, as soon as he is old enough for a big bed and could get out of the bed, then I guess we will have to resort to nites out on the town and have fun in a hotel room...which by that point will be fine and dandy for us as I love to get a nite out!!!

[eroticsensation 17]

And what if you are caught? How do you explain that to your kids? Aren't your kids more important than getting an extra rush over the fact that they might catch you?

 

This is what I was thinking! We have a 5 year old daughter. I would never forgive myself if she caught us in the act. She is old and smart enough to remember this for good. In my opinion it is careless to do it while kids are in the home. it is just not right with us.

[stoutgatte 25]

As with many others our child (baby) sleeps in a cot, which she can't get out of on her own. Once she starts sleeping in a proper bed and the risk of her walking in on us becomes realistic, swinging with her in the house is not an option.

[us2maybe 15]

I just don't think that's a good idea. I mean its kinda asking for an issue to happen...lord knows its bad enough if your kids were to catch the two parents together...what would you tell them with an "outsider" being intimate. It would truly be asking for a potential issue, and inviting issues...this could potentially border on an issue that if the wrong person got hold of - child endangerment or reason for someone's kids to be taken. Perhaps if it was an infant, but even then with swinging safety has to be key and god forbid some issue arouse of jealousy or violence that your child would be in that environment.

[akamgaxoxo 25]

Perhaps if it was an infant, but even then with swinging safety has to be key and god forbid some issue arouse of jealousy or violence that your child would be in that environment.

 

Quote from US2maybe

 

Of course we are all entitled to our own opinions, however, if I had that much of a fear about whether any violence would happen to my child while a friend was over, then I would NOT be swinging with that friend just for my own safety's sake.....

[tazzie_n_truck 17]

We have been with another couple while our kids were in the house sleeping, but we feel alot more comfortable doing it without the kids around. Lately when we have swapped with another couple, the kids havn't been there.

[4forfun 15]

Are yours and your friends children sleeping in a crib? Probably not by their ages, so what if the children wake up and happen to catch you with a different partner? How do you explain that? It seems to me that having fun is first and foremost in your lives than worrying about your children walking in on you. Shame on you.

[LikeMinds321 1,527]

I don't have children, but I remember babysitting children who were sleeping in cribs but would climb right over the top and appear in the living room.

 

If a child can walk - as do three and four year olds - they are old enough to walk in on your activities. I think this would be inappropriate.

 

LM

[JustAskJulie 2,595]

I just finally had a chance to watch the Oprah: After the Show follow-up to the show she did on Swinging a few weeks ago.

 

One of the things that caught my attention was a letter she read from a woman who wrote that her father was a swinger (from what she wrote/said I wouldn't really call him a swinger but that's another discussion) and would take her to swing parties.

 

Basically, all the people he played with had kids and they would rotate houses, the kids would be sent off to a separate area of the house or sent outside, but the kids all knew what was going on inside. Her words (and something I have said many times) "Kids are much smarter than they are given credit for".

 

So the poll above, and please give your thoughts and experiences as well.

[mwsw4ever 15]

As a child of former swingers my parents never did anything at home when me or my sister were around.I caught on when i was in my early teens from all the strangers calling, lots of mail from all over,and condoms in their bedroom(my mother had her tubes tied).I don't know even at that age how i would have been affected by being at the same place they were swinging at and possibly seeing more than i had wanted too.I had a hard time trying to understand why they would do this and felt very confused at the time.Now that me and my wife are in the lifestyle i fully understand why now.I would think for a younger child to be in that situation and find out would leave a mark on them emotionally.Recently i had the chance to chat with a couple we met on SLS where she had found out her parents were swingers by seeing her parents in a 3some with a family friend when she got home from school,she was 9 at the time.She had told me they had planned to swing up to the time they had a child. Me and the Mrs would never swing with any kids around ours or the other couples.I feel the right time for our children to know is when they are old enough and mature enough to fully understand.

[Spoomonkey 421]

When we were first being "introduced" to the lifestyle, our "older, wiser" mentor couple had us over for some "innocent" nakedness. We played strip games and that was as far as it went.

 

Their kids were asleep upstairs, but the games took place in the living room - right at the bottom of the stairs. We just followed their lead and figured they knew what they were doing...

 

Looking back on it now, it makes my stomach twist in knots. What if the kids had come down for water and seen four adults bare-assed naked? What sort of damage would that do to a kid?

 

We were new and naive...

 

Never, ever again...

 

Spoomonkey

[Mrs Spoomonkey 118]

Mr Spoo said it. It sometimes sickens me to think about that time, we were new and trusting them to show us the "ropes" so to speak. I can't believe they were willing to do that and as Mr Spoo indicated. . . . NEVER EVER AGAIN!

 

Mrs Spoomonkey

[Alura 2,774]

We only played one time with our children at home. They were very young and upstairs asleep. The action took place outside in the swimming pool.

 

Had they awakened and come outside, which they never did at that age, the motion-sensing lights would have warned us in time.

 

We would not do the same thing today. They're teenagers and very aware of most everything.

 

Mr. Alura

[CB_n_Red 16]

We would not do the same thing today. They're teenagers and very aware of most everything.

 

Mr. Alura

 

I think that is a very significant comment! Teenagers (and even younger kids) really do seem to be far more aware of what is going on around them than many of us (I suspect) give them credit for. Red and I have one "child" still at home (the other two have long since got their own places). She is nearly 20 now and we are pretty sure that she has a good idea of what we are up to, though she is tactful enough not to ask the questions which might result in answers she wouldn't want to hear. I don't think she would be shocked (we didn't bring up the kids to have those sorts of hidebound attitudes) though it might make her uncomfortable if she knew the truth.

 

Needless to say, we don't play at home. There's no knowing what hour of the day or night she might show up!

 

Food for thought.

 

CB

[xxoticangel 99]

Years ago we played with children in the house. One couple had a toddler of about 18 months and we always played behind locked doors. We also had a one or two playdates while our childern were home but again they were very young (4 and 2), our guest arrived after they were asleep, and we locked the bedroom door before anyone got naked. Now that they are older we would never consider doing anything with them in the house. The only time we get online for adult purposes is after they are asleep or while they are in school.

 

I also grew up in a swinging household. When I was young (5 or 6) my "Uncle" Bill would come into town once a month or so and he slept in my parents room (where else would he sleep? my friends that slept over slept in my room). We also had joint vacations with other families where the children had one room and the parents had an ajoining room. I was 8 or 9 and didn't think anything about it. Looking back my parents were not very discreet but I didn't realize anything was going on until I got involved in the the lifestyle. Thoughts or situations pop into my head and it triggers a memory from my youth and I realize what was happening.

[two4youinswva 3,068]

I remember my high school girlfriend telling me that her parents were swingers. I barely knew what that meant at the time, so she explained it all to me. Her parents weren't very discreet about it either. They had one couple they played with. She said they would all go in the bedroom, tell the kids to "stay downstairs and play", and lock the door behind them. How hard would that be to figure out for even the youngest of kids? I met the other couple a few times, and can tell you, they were the type that give swingers a bad name. They were the cliche of bad swingers. Absolutely no discretion, using lots of sexual innuendo around the kids , and generally loud and mouthy.

 

As for the girlfriend, she was really embarrassed about it. Of course most 16 year old girls are embarrassed about anything their parents do. Looking back on it, I felt bad for her that her parents didn't use better judgement in their recreational activities.

[Atilla 16]

Never!!!!

 

I understand someone playing with the children asleep upstairs and having some sort of warning system if that child awoke but to have children in a seperate room, NO WAY!!!!

 

I never have sex with DH if my child is awake so why would I swing if children were awake even if occupied. Children are unpredictable and this is defiantely something that I don't want our child knowing. It's our business what we do not our child's business.

[J & K 16]

We have and I "J" didn't like it. Matter of fact I even hate to party or drink with kids around. Seems like a lot of folks we know it is ok when their kids are around and the adults drink and flirt.

 

One cpl we know is so lame with sending their teenagers off their excuse is nobody can watch them. Duh...what about the 5 straight cpls you know that have kids to babysit? We send ours off for overnight stays with grandma, but we know Grandma isn't in every city.

 

If you have swinging friends with kids take turns asking to watch eachother's kids, but set aside for a private meeting to make up for it. Now-a-days babysitters are hard to find and trust.

 

Make the best of it folks!!!

[DBL D 120]

Pretty Bizarre Behaviour!

 

Is the chance of being seen by the kids a sexual exciter of some kind?

 

Not sure why someone would do that just to save a few bucks on a babysitter.

 

Male D