Closed swinging groups.

[MikeBravo 16]

A swinger told me "We're in a group now in [state] that has two rules.1 No fucking outside of the group. 2 No condoms inside the group."

 

Has anyone ever heard os such a thing?

[Billygoat 443]

Yes...often and in varying levels.  From various levels of poly lifestyles and within the swing/lifestyle communities.  As with any alternative lifestyle choice....it is a choice.  For many it is a desire to share naturally and fully and found more often then not among older couples and singles.  A choice....not an assumption.

[Fitlakecouple 451]

5 hours ago, MikeBravo said:

A swinger told me "We're in a group now in [state] that has two rules.1 No fucking outside of the group. 2 No condoms inside the group."

 

Has anyone ever heard os such a thing?

Fluid Bonded is the term...

[Numex 2,416]

That's us.  Our group became that way so there is no need for condoms.   Turns out there are two other reasons this works well.  We trust one another so that playing without one's spouse present is fine, alone play, threesomes, etc.  Second, one of us will watch each other's kids along with our own so others can play.  Both results in more opportunities to have sex.  

Edited February 23, 2021 by Numex

[AndrewandAnn 360]

Let me preface everything here by saying this is from the PRE-pandemic perspective. A LOT has changed since then, unfortunately:

 

Yes on the "closed" group. Although we have never taken "blood oaths", we have all agreed to keep things between the partners. So, it is unofficially officially a closed group. 

 

Historically, we have participated with a very small, very intimate group of people.  We arrived at the conclusion, for our needs, keeping things small had far more advantages than disadvantages:

 

Trust was probably the biggest reason. We know everyone quite well. We know their social habits. We know they can maintain privacy. We know they can act like adults in public, and playful sex dynamos in private.

 

Health is another big reason. Let's face it: Having sex with anyone outside of your normal partner adds a certain health risk. It is a simple, unavoidable biological fact. Limiting our sex partners to a select few helps to minimize the health risks. Everyone is/was STD tested originally. No condoms? No way. The ladies are all beyond childbearing years, but condoms are used, always, always, ALWAYS. Yes, accidents can happen, and they have. But, condoms are always required for play. They can be removed at the point of climax, so long as there is no internal release of semen. Ejaculating internally is strictly off-limits (with the obvious exception of the spouses.)

 

Now, in this new age of COVID-19...? Whew. It adds a very complicated wrinkle. We haven't had any kind of meaningful play contact since it all started early last year...

 

 

Edited February 23, 2021 by AndrewandAnn

[hunterdonNJcpl 1,389]

i think that's how a lot of swingers are getting through covid.  We never really considered a closed swinging situation pre-pandemic but we're in one now.

[AndrewandAnn 360]

20 hours ago, hunterdonNJcpl said:

i think that's how a lot of swingers are getting through covid.  We never really considered a closed swinging situation pre-pandemic but we're in one now.

Curious...

 

Have you played since the start of the pandemic? And, if so, Did you wait until everyone was vaccinated?

 

We're in a weird situation because the male half of one of the couples in our circle has decided he's not getting vaccinated. We were collectively shocked by the decision.

 

We've been playing with this couple for over a decade... but it looks like those days have come to a close. Ann is very upset over it because she feels like its the end of our ability to closely socialize with them both inside, and outside, of the playroom. I am very upset, too.

[TricianMike 772]

12 minutes ago, AndrewandAnn said:

We're in a weird situation because the male half of one of the couples in our circle has decided he's not getting vaccinated. We were collectively shocked by the decision.

Right now a very small percentage of the population has been vaccinated and many people unfortunately are waiting for others to get vaccinated first. The sad part is in order to get herd immunity the big majority needs to agree to get the vaccination. 

Not getting vaccinated mostly affects the person not getting the vaccine. Science isn’t sure if vaccinated people can pass the virus on, it only protects the person vaccinated from getting overly sick or severely ill. The virus can still live in the body even if vaccinated. 

We all have our own level of safety and your decision should be based on yours. I’m not smart enough to know how much safer playing with a vaccinated is. 

[hunterdonNJcpl 1,389]

51 minutes ago, AndrewandAnn said:

Curious...

 

Have you played since the start of the pandemic? And, if so, Did you wait until everyone was vaccinated?

 

We're in a weird situation because the male half of one of the couples in our circle has decided he's not getting vaccinated. We were collectively shocked by the decision.

 

We've been playing with this couple for over a decade... but it looks like those days have come to a close. Ann is very upset over it because she feels like its the end of our ability to closely socialize with them both inside, and outside, of the playroom. I am very upset, too.

We did not wait until everyone was vaccinated and as a matter of fact none of us are vaccinated today - but we signed up for vaccines and are awaiting our turn.

We spent the entire Spring 2020 lockdown self-quarantined. Then in the summer a single male friend reached out to us. Long story short the three of us made a pact to be in a closed group and not play with others.  The three of us are careful about mask-wearing, social-distancing and hygene so we feel Ok about getting together.  If he was the type to dismiss the seriousness of the pandemic or take a stand against vaccines it would never have worked.

 

We're a little shocked honestly by the numbers of swingers who are cavalier about this virus.  We feel your pain about Lifestyle social circles literally vanishing, which is why we value our closed threesome and take care to keep healthy. If we lose him we have nobody and with the way this pandemic spiked this winter it's a bad time to meet new people.

[AndrewandAnn 360]

4 hours ago, TricianMike said:

Right now a very small percentage of the population has been vaccinated and many people unfortunately are waiting for others to get vaccinated first. The sad part is in order to get herd immunity the big majority needs to agree to get the vaccination. 

Not getting vaccinated mostly affects the person not getting the vaccine. Science isn’t sure if vaccinated people can pass the virus on, it only protects the person vaccinated from getting overly sick or severely ill. The virus can still live in the body even if vaccinated. 

We all have our own level of safety and your decision should be based on yours. I’m not smart enough to know how much safer playing with a vaccinated is. 

Yes, you make some good points.

 

Unfortunately, the available information about what happens post-vaccination is scant. We simply do not yet know the answers to the questions you posed.

 

However, if history is our guide, vaccines have ordinarily provided protection against the further spread of the disease in question. I would imagine that the COVID-19 vaccines will perform similarly. But that is only an educated guess.

 

Today, we simply do not feel comfortable (safe) playing with people who have not been vaccinated. That may change over time... 

 

[njbm 2,871]

We used to worry about HPV and HSV. But the coronavirus takes it to another level. 

Looks like swinging will be rediscovered in the year 2200, when science defeats all viruses. 

[Lionheart72 2,190]

23 hours ago, hunterdonNJcpl said:

We're a little shocked honestly by the numbers of swingers who are cavalier about this virus. 

Let's be honest... At least in my experience, swingers as a group have always been a little cavalier about health. We have anonymous sex with strangers in the world of AIDS. A significant minority of swingers I know smoke like chimneys and drink far too much. So, I guess I'm not really shocked that in the face of a global pandemic, at least a few of us are looking to get one more orgy in.

 

Personally, I don't smoke, I don't drink, we use condoms and we stopped even looking to go out when the pandemic started but that's us. We're basically nerds.

[njbm 2,871]

18 minutes ago, Lionheart72 said:

Let's be honest... At least in my experience, swingers as a group have always been a little cavalier about health. We have anonymous sex with strangers in the world of AIDS. A significant minority of swingers I know smoke like chimneys and drink far too much. So, I guess I'm not really shocked that in the face of a global pandemic, at least a few of us are looking to get one more orgy in.

 

Personally, I don't smoke, I don't drink, we use condoms and we stopped even looking to go out when the pandemic started but that's us. We're basically nerds.

I like to call it science based. 

[EastInWest 1,524]

On 2/24/2021 at 10:32 AM, hunterdonNJcpl said:

We're a little shocked honestly by the numbers of swingers who are cavalier about this virus.

To be honest I'm not sure swingers are more cavalier than average.

 

We know enough vanilla singles who are still very much at it on Tinder and elsewhere, even if they aren't going out to socialize. Some people might be having more casual sex than they did before, just because it's the main way to spend time with new people without sitting in a bar.

 

Edited February 25, 2021 by EastInWest

[njbm 2,871]

I heard that when singles dump a partner because they do not take enough covid precautions, they have been “Fauci’d,”

[GoldCoCouple 4,065]

We would love to form (some kind of a) closed group...it's the finding other people who also want to be in it with us that is hard.

 

PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER. - Groucho Marx

[adamgunn 1,460]

The Cypress Point Club held a membership drive, and drove twenty members out. - Bob Hope