Men...why do you swing?

Tarnished Halo · April 7, 2004

Rett suggested that this question be asked, so I'll ask it. Most of the time as I understand it, it's the guys who suggest swinging. What are your reasonings, and what do you tell your wife/girlfriend? Is it the sowing of oats, or the harem, or is there something else that is the prime motivating factor?

Tarnished

Spoomonkey · April 7, 2004

Honestly - I really wanted to see Mrs Spoomonkey in a pile... I've kind of always had the fantasy, but it grew especially strong when it became obvious that Mrs Spoomonkey was a "bad girl." We had/have a GREAT sex life - and the idea of expanding it was just something that really came about for both of us.

I am not terribly into the "harem" thing - in fact, single females rank as number three on our list of interests - after threesomes (MMF) and couples (which are frankly in a virtual tie). Sure - I would never turn down a chorus of Grecian women who'd like to "blow my hair dry"... But I am not out trying to see how many women I can "bag". I have my bag at the ready,though, just in case...

It really is for and about us. Trite, but true...

The powerful connection and lust that we have the week after is the REAL payoff...

Spoomonkey

April 8, 2004

I will have to go with spoo here.

It has nothing to do with sowing wild oats.

It is about watching the woman I love fullfill her deepest desires.

Being with another woman does not do near as much for me as watching Mrs naughty being brought to an orgasm.

The reason we mostly do the couples thing because I feel like a peeping tom if I just sit back and watch. Plus I am not going to deny its damn fun because it is.

But Numero Uno number 1 for me is watching Mrs naughty get hers!!!

I think you will find most guys who swing feel that it is more about "Her" than it is about him.

fun_pairTX · April 8, 2004

Well one night early in our relationship Barbara rolled over and said "I have found myself attracted to women all my life" All I could reply was COOL. It is the bi thing that drew us in.

MrYaWanna · April 8, 2004

I'll go out on a limb here...Men swing for the same reason we don't get Mad Cow Disease....we're all pigs lol

Men love sex. Most of us are raised to think we are perverts because we think about banging every skirt we see. We could never imagine that a woman would think the same thing.

I was amazed to discover that some women think the same way we do. OMG...can it be true...so of course we have to watch...smart men listen too. There must be something wrong here. We all know that if it seems too good to be true it must not be true. But there she is, the woman we love, going wild in a sexual way, completely lost in the heat of the moment. No film trickery, no mirrors, ok, maybe some mirrors, but they are not there to fool us.

Men love sex, we are raised to assume women "put up" with sex. Poor bastards that are married to those girls

Lo and behold, women, at least our women, love sex too and they are secure, free, confident enough to show it.

I Love my girl, she loves me. We are more honest with each other then anyone I know.

What was the question again? I'm all gushy now.

Oh yes, Men swing because we want to and we can.

Lucky men swing because they've found that perfect woman!

Spoomonkey · April 8, 2004

Originally posted by MrYaWanna
I'll go out on a limb here...Men swing for the same reason we don't get Mad Cow Disease....we're all pigs lol

Usually I say that we are dogs - but this perfect!

Lucky men swing because they've found that perfect woman!

While we do have different reasons to swing, this quote is absolutely true! Mr Yawanna, I share your love for our swinging wives. Thanks for gushing.

Spoomonkey

lcjtsd · April 8, 2004

I have to agree that watching her having fun IS what it's all about.

I have to admit that before we did anything, I thought I would be the wild one and she would be the shy one. Boy was I wrong! We haven't had many experiences, however, I learned a few things about Mrs. LCJTSD from all this and our sex life is better than ever.

When we are out playing, be it a single guy or another couple, my number one concern is how much fun is she having. If I felt she wasn't enjoying herself, I would stop things right then. My feelings, needs, wants, desires all come second. Hers come first!

VegasLee · April 8, 2004

To be honest I swing for very selfish reasons. It is the sex!

Not the sex that I may or may not have with other women but the sex I have with Laura. I am the luckyest guy in the world. No matter how many others I have I find that none of them hold a candle to her.

It is great that I can be a flirt (yes, men flirt too), play touchy feely and mess around with other ladies when I want knowing that it is not going to cause a problem within my relationship.

The greatest part is like many here have stated, seeing her have a great time! She is one that the more she gets the more she wants and when she gets around to me it is like I am having sex with all the women in the club at once. Totally wild! I have never experieced anything like it in my life and I have been in the lifestyle many years.

If life could get any better I really do not know who that would be!

Brit_Pair · April 8, 2004

Originally posted by fun_pairTX
Well one night early in our relationship Barbara rolled over and said "I have found myself attracted to women all my life" All I could reply was COOL. It is the bi thing that drew us in.

Dito

Spoomonkey · April 8, 2004

Originally posted by lcjtsd
When we are out playing, be it a single guy or another couple, my number one concern is how much fun is she having.

Okay - something just struck me because of the post above...

I tend to struggle with shyness when we are playing with another couple. Three reasons: 1) I AM shy. 2) I don't want to be over domineering to the wife. 3) I don't want to step over any imaginary lines the husband may have set...

Irrational? Of course... It seems that most of the men are in this because they get turned on by their wife's pleasure. Just as in our own private moments, we are likely taken to that place of not being able to control ourselves only after we have driven ourselves crazy by driving our wife crazy... (Pardon the run on).

How liberating to know that other men think like I do! So - from now on - I promise to pleasure your wife just the way you like it

Spoomonkey

SparkyandAJ · April 9, 2004

I got the mrs to try swinging because she had never been with another man. I didn't want her hitting 40 and wondering if she was missing out on something. If she wanted to see if she was missing out on something, at least this way she would have my permission and not be cheating. Some friends of ours got divorced a few years back after over 20 years of marriage....she thought she was missing out on life. I didn't want my marriage to go the same way.

Life is great for us after a year in the lifestyle! Our relationship was never in trouble, but it sure has improved! And like all the other guys here, I love to watch her with other guys!!! Just to see her get pleasure from anything, especially SEX, does it for me. I like to get mine too, but it is for her pleasure foremost!

Rett · April 10, 2004

Hi , Tarnished Halo

I'll try to make an attempt at explaining why at least "some" males want to swing. Bear in mind that the following may not apply to everyone nor every situation.

I guess the males nature and thought process throughout time has been that he values his manhjood through his sexual prowess. Thus, for many of the younger adult males the first thought when they see an attractive woman is that they fantasize having sex with her. For some having uninhibited bedroom activities with any attractive woman is regarded as being manly and a token of his achievement. The fact that a man gets sexually aroused by porno or the presence of an attractive woman is probably due to his testosterone level and his basic primal instincts. In his early dating stages he probably just likes to play the field and is not looking for what may be and enduring relationship. His sexual life may get started with having sex with various partners in the process of dating or as a new and exciting swinging activity with acquaintances without intended obligations, an it's fun for him. Just look at the nuber of single males looking for swinging hookups via the internet and all that would desire to enter a swinger club.

Now comes the marriage period. During the courting period and the first several years of living together the sex life may be often and fantastic, but after several years the sex is just not quite a exciting anymore. The toils of live at the job, in maintaining the home, in raising children, in meeting financial goals, etc. have set in and life has changed dramatically. The sex life may become just a husband/wife activity and a lot of the thrill, excitement, and passion enjoyed in the eaarly stages have leveled out. The woman may be fatigued by the many roles and tasks in the relationship. The male may devote more interest in succeeding in his job than showing love and desire to the wife. Perhaps his interest turns to excessive time devoted to his friends or sports. Why is the male not having a normal sex life anymore? The males basic primal instincts react in the form of sexual fantasies (it would be interesting to see in a poll if this is true and the time period it happened in). He thinks swinging would enhance the couples sex life and he starts suggesting the fantasies to his partner. Through swinging he may enact out hic lost desires and more. If he can entice her into swinging he can live out his fantasies. If both partners find the lifestyle is compatible and they are fully committed as on in both love and trust he has the perfect woman for him and maybe it will draw them closer together . he must be careful here as there are many pitfalls in every relationship and swinging may ampligly them. As many have said, once you take the step you can't ever take it back.

The male likes, dislikes, and temperament also changes as he matures and gets older. The type of woman he found attractive in his twenties, he may not be attracted to as he reaches age 30 or 40 and beyond.How may he live out his fantasies while keeping his relationship- by getting his companion into swinging. If she is having sex with others through swinging and without cheating then so can he have sex. A new and fun adventure to spice up life again, which they can both participate and enhance their married sex life. Perhaps, he may also explore sexual activities he has not enjoyed at home.

Tarnished Halo, I've been reading the few responses to your question as to why men swing. Basically those that answered said to enhance their married sex lives, to watch and enjoy their wife fulfilling her desires and being pleasured and are turned on by it , that swinging brings them closer together through enhanced communication with one another, and it's a fun activity. I would dobt, however., that many men could sustain a completely one-sided swinging relationship where he only watched and never had sex but just enjoyed swinging by watching his wife being pleasured by another man. Swinging is mainly a couple activity. As stated by mostly everyone, swinging is not for everone. I guess that says that for those that are within the majority of society the alternative lifestyle of swinging is not an accepted activity.

As for women, it seems they are now becoming much more aggressive in regards to sex. Probably the changes in cultural society and the use and availability of computer sex have helped open this up . However, the woman's greatest sexual desire is opened up more through emotional relations and intellectually based factors - quite different that that of a man. Rather than just having uninhibited sex, a woman may want love. A women's most often statement about men is "All they want is one thing". How many single women would continue dating a man if his primary interests were in swinging and not her as a person he loves and care for? Men - try a little tenderness, it goes a long way

sharp1 · April 10, 2004

Why do I like to Swing?

1. I like group sex

2. I love being the "other guy" men like to watch having sex with their wives/ girlfriends.

3. I enjoy being Single (That's why I'm still single and not a part of a couple in this lifestyle)

tazzie_n_truck · April 11, 2004

Me (Truck), I feel the reason that we got into swinging, was we wanted to expiriment sexually, we have some friends who told us about it and we talked about trying it and seeing if we would enjoy it, then one weekend almost 3 years ago, we swapped with our first couple, havn't been with them since, but would love to if we ever had the chance to again, it was also Tazzie's first bi-expirience that night.

But someone asked us recently as to why we still swing, and Tazzie and I told them that we enjoy the lifestyle and how we are able to do different things with different people, because there are some things that Tazzie won't do and I won't do that we each have wanted to expirience and in swinging we have found people that do enjoy those things.

As far as getting started in it in the first place, we have to say niether one of us really can say it was one of us over the other who wanted to give it a try, we both were struck with the interest by friends and we talked about it and decided together to give it a try.

I often tell other couples out there who are interested in swinging, to sit down and talk about it to make sure that it is something that they are going to be comfortable doing, especially if they full swap if they are going to be in the same room being comfortable with their partner having sex with someone else.

Hope this helps.

SparkyandAJ · April 11, 2004

For whatever reasons you try swinging, if you are here, you are at a great place to begin! Look at what people have to say about all aspect of the lifestyle. Many different opinions about different aspects. Read what you can, then TALK with your partner about what you want and what you don't. Be sure you are both on the same page before jumping in! Be safe and have fun!!!

cpl4playmass · April 12, 2004

My woman wanted some girl/girl play. I enjoyed it, but now we have shifted to couples and single men..... She's discovered it's more fun having two cocks in her face!! LOL

I like to watch her go wild, and it's nice to get a blow job from other ladies!! I'm really not into screwing other women, but that's there too if I want it.

NealnAnji · April 14, 2004

Great points made by everyone who responded to this thread. However, the most cogent and closest to truth is the response by Rett quoted fully here.

As he says for most men, me included, when he sees an attractive woman, the foremost thought is that of sexual interaction with her. He fantasizes about getting her fully nude, caressing her and with plenty of foreplay getting her fully aroused for intercourse. The man on seeing an attractive, sexy, woman gets an erection and has an unstoppable urge, as she spreads her thighs, to slip his erect penis in her well lubed vagina as her juices flow. The act of sexual intercourse where his penis and her vagina interact is a very natural act for the man to satisfy his sexual urge. That is why he lets his wife play with another man, spread her thighs, guide the penis in her vagina, and let her enjoy intercourse. To swing just to watch wife having intercourse with another man, for whatever kicks that might provide would be quite boring for the man, and, eventually frustrating unless he gets to fuck the other man's wife.

How many men can deny that they actively fantasize about fucking another man's wife. I have fantasized many times about having sex with another woman. Without the act of both partners swinging or indulging in intercourse with someone other than one's wife/hubby, adultery would be the only way to satisfy one's sexual desires for multiple sex partners.

It seems, as Rett correctly points out , a woman's response is entirely different. She does not fantasize about fucking a handsome man as soon as she sees him. Her sexual response is conditioned upo him being articulate, sociable, and, a good conversationalist, besides being attractive. If all these conditions are satisafied the woman may allow him to undress her, and get intimate with her. If the man is good at foreplay, he may arouse her and get her to spread her thighs for her. Under these circumstances, the woman, fully aroused, may not even notice while he places the tip of his erect dick at her vaginal opening and then slides his cock fully into her vagina. If the man is good at the act of intercourse, the woman will fully enjoy the act and may even ask for repeated intercourse. This is not to deny the pleasure the hubby get from watching his wife, the man's penis in her vagina, moaning and groaning with delight, comign to a thrilling orgasm and getting fully sexually satisfied. This also assumes that the hubby has fulfilled his wish to fuck someone other than his wife and fully enjoyed the actof inbtercourse with her.

Just my two cents.

neal

QUOTE]Originally posted by Rett

Hi , Tarnished Halo

I'll try to make an attempt at explaining why at least "some" males want to swing. Bear in mind that the following may not apply to everyone nor every situation.

I guess the males nature and thought process throughout time has been that he values his manhjood through his sexual prowess. Thus, for many of the younger adult males the first thought when they see an attractive woman is that they fantasize having sex with her. For some having uninhibited bedroom activities with any attractive woman is regarded as being manly and a token of his achievement. The fact that a man gets sexually aroused by porno or the presence of an attractive woman is probably due to his testosterone level and his basic primal instincts. In his early dating stages he probably just likes to play the field and is not looking for what may be and enduring relationship. His sexual life may get started with having sex with various partners in the process of dating or as a new and exciting swinging activity with acquaintances without intended obligations, an it's fun for him. Just look at the nuber of single males looking for swinging hookups via the internet and all that would desire to enter a swinger club.

Now comes the marriage period. During the courting period and the first several years of living together the sex life may be often and fantastic, but after several years the sex is just not quite a exciting anymore. The toils of live at the job, in maintaining the home, in raising children, in meeting financial goals, etc. have set in and life has changed dramatically. The sex life may become just a husband/wife activity and a lot of the thrill, excitement, and passion enjoyed in the eaarly stages have leveled out. The woman may be fatigued by the many roles and tasks in the relationship. The male may devote more interest in succeeding in his job than showing love and desire to the wife. Perhaps his interest turns to excessive time devoted to his friends or sports. Why is the male not having a normal sex life anymore? The males basic primal instincts react in the form of sexual fantasies (it would be interesting to see in a poll if this is true and the time period it happened in). He thinks swinging would enhance the couples sex life and he starts suggesting the fantasies to his partner. Through swinging he may enact out hic lost desires and more. If he can entice her into swinging he can live out his fantasies. If both partners find the lifestyle is compatible and they are fully committed as on in both love and trust he has the perfect woman for him and maybe it will draw them closer together . he must be careful here as there are many pitfalls in every relationship and swinging may ampligly them. As many have said, once you take the step you can't ever take it back.

The male likes, dislikes, and temperament also changes as he matures and gets older. The type of woman he found attractive in his twenties, he may not be attracted to as he reaches age 30 or 40 and beyond.How may he live out his fantasies while keeping his relationship- by getting his companion into swinging. If she is having sex with others through swinging and without cheating then so can he have sex. A new and fun adventure to spice up life again, which they can both participate and enhance their married sex life. Perhaps, he may also explore sexual activities he has not enjoyed at home.

Tarnished Halo, I've been reading the few responses to your question as to why men swing. Basically those that answered said to enhance their married sex lives, to watch and enjoy their wife fulfilling her desires and being pleasured and are turned on by it , that swinging brings them closer together through enhanced communication with one another, and it's a fun activity. I would dobt, however., that many men could sustain a completely one-sided swinging relationship where he only watched and never had sex but just enjoyed swinging by watching his wife being pleasured by another man. Swinging is mainly a couple activity. As stated by mostly everyone, swinging is not for everone. I guess that says that for those that are within the majority of society the alternative lifestyle of swinging is not an accepted activity.

As for women, it seems they are now becoming much more aggressive in regards to sex. Probably the changes in cultural society and the use and availability of computer sex have helped open this up . However, the woman's greatest sexual desire is opened up more through emotional relations and intellectually based factors - quite different that that of a man. Rather than just having uninhibited sex, a woman may want love. A women's most often statement about men is "All they want is one thing". How many single women would continue dating a man if his primary interests were in swinging and not her as a person he loves and care for? Men - try a little tenderness, it goes a long way

Tarnished Halo · April 14, 2004

On an intellectual level, I think that I might understand your reasonings, but the very differences in how men and women hold sex seems to almost invite disaster at least to relationships, while trying to satisfy those urges.

You say that men simply want sex with a woman that they find attractive. You then say that women are satisfying urges based on a more emotional level. It is when these two different urges are acted upon within a stable relationship, with consideration that you are not going to seek any further satisfying your urges with someone else's wife, and your wife, while satisfying her urges, is not going to seek to continue to take those emotionally satifying to a further level with someone else's husband. Whew!!! Did I get that right?

So....if I did get that right......You can have sex with someone else? She (your wife that is), can have sex with someone else, but when you come down to it, aren't you still just having sex? IF you are still "making love" and find that the sex with your wife or husband is satisfying, then why are you seeking others to have sex with when you are already having sex? Now...I know that I didn't throw this into the mix, and I think that this is the crux of swinging. Yes....you make love to your spouse. You love your spouse. You don't want to get rid of your spouse. You simply want to have sex with your spouse, and ocassionally have sex with someone who is not your spouse, but not mess up your relationship?

Now please hold on a minute. I am not stupid. Or at least no one has given me a sign yet. I obviously can't separate sex and love, although intellectually, I can say that there is a difference between wanting to spend the night between some hotties' legs, and getting a chance to go home with the person you have had children with, are buying a home with, the one that you are going to wake up with. BUT....with few exceptions, most people seem to mess up their relationships by trying to include others sexually in that relationship. Either they are inconsiderate, cross a line either intentionally, or accidently, don't have their head screwed on tight, or myriad other reasons. Just look at all the questions about how to avoid damaging their relationships, or repairing the damage to their relationships, etc etc.

Unfortunately, there isn't a "right" way to swing, but there are things that you can do that are either going to make it more "workable" or are going to guarantee that the only swinging experience many are going to have are going to be their last. These are the things that I look for, and the reason that I stay on the board. For those who are not aware, swinging caused some serious damage to my relationship, although the possibility of swinging happening has not been completely ruled out. Most of the rules are too vague or of a general nature to be of much help. Perhaps someone who is experienced (not write a book mind you, there seem to be plenty of those, yet as "how to" manuals, they seem to fall a tad short.) could give us some very real tips on successful swinging.

Oh well..........

still struggling.

Tarnished.

yawanna · April 14, 2004

If it's a 'struggle' rather than a constructive discussion or mutual exploration or simply a topic of conversation... then a key component of this that would open the swinging door for you is missing. Why struggle? Take it off the table as a consideration.

SexhoundDog · April 14, 2004

Tarnished,

I myself am not a swinger, I guess I'm a swinger wannabe. However, I doubt it will ever happen, and if it does, it will most likely be soft swing at most since I doubt my wife shares my feelings. From your posts, I doubt swinging is for you, although I certainly welcome your posts to the board.

I think RETT's quotes sum it up best. Simply stated, most men don't have complex issues to deal with when it comes to wanting sex with a woman. You can be married and love your wife, but a man is always thinking about having sex with other women. It's nature. We also have the advantage of not carrying any baggage where society may think we're easy and slutty, even tho I'm guessing we're starting to see slow change there amongst the younger generation. Of course, they thought that in the late 60's too, and a lot of that fizzled out (much to my chagrin!).

Most of the women on this board have said "fuck it" to society's rules, and I'd guess they're blessed with a higher sex drive than most women in society. They either have the drive naturally or their husbands are kind and considerate lovers, or both. But that aside, they also aren't afraid to jump in the sack with someone they find attractive, either looks or personality, or whatever does it for them. And most importantly, they have the kind of relationship with their husband where they don't have to dance around the subject of saying when they think someone else is hot for fear of bruising the male's ego. These same women totally expect that it's perfectly natural for their men to eye and want other women as well.

I've had similar opinions to this board and read it long enough to know that it's a two way street. BOTH parties have to want to experiment, and those that enjoy continue to do so. You'll notice that one of the main turn-ons for the men is to see their wives getting pleasured. I don't know if the women feel their big turn-on is getting pleasured by strange dick or watching their men please and be pleased by other women. I'd bet that the female sex is more into their own pleasure than watching their mate! And, I'd also bet part of the reason for that is that they're probably thinking "this is great, I'm getting to satisfy my lustful desires without any fear of anyone thinking I'm being slutty, in fact, my husband is encouraging it!" It's probably been a repressed desire for too many years and they're lucky enough to be in a relation where they can shed that crap.

Personally, I'd take more enjoyment out of watching my wife enjoy more partners than I would out of banging new beaver, although I'd certainly enjoy that too. I think the main reason more men DON'T swing is that they're too afraid of fucking up their relationship with the one they love. I'm sure there are women in this boat too. The people that do enjoy swinging, and together I might add, have freedoms you and I will probably never enjoy, the lucky dogs!!

Amy and Mike · April 14, 2004

this is mike...

tarnished halo, your posts are always interesting...but i can never figure out whether or not you really are interested in swinging for YOURSELF. im just curious, if your husband said it didnt matter to him whether or not the two of you became involved in swinging, would you want to persue it? or is it something you want to do just so your husband will be satisfied?

i would most likely never have brought up the idea of swinging with my wife. for one thing, i dont think it would have occured to me that she might be interested in something like that. then one day she told me she was thinking about a threesome with another guy, and that started us talking about it. we were BOTH really enthusiastic about the idea. if that hadnt been the case, we'd never have even continued to discus the idea. For me, the big turn-on was seeing my wife open up and start being more sexual than she ever had been. Our experience so far has been only one threesome with no intercourse, but most likely we'll do more in the future.

wrksdone · November 18, 2005

I grew up w/a small group of about 10 friends, most had both parents working and we spent a lot of time w/out adults. We were all about the same age. As we matured, we played together, all of us, sometimes as a group. It was normal for us to play w/the person we were with, even if it was a different person day to day. All straight sex, no jealousies. Assumed it to be normal. As I got older, I had trouble dating girls that didnt share my experiences and I was told "I" wasnt normal to think about sex w/others. I felt that I may need to see a shrink. It wasnt until in I found girls that shared my thoughts and were able to be honest about their sexuality that "I" started feeling normal. I am thankful I met them!

For me, swinging is normal, its the way I grew up.

GerdOEvert · November 19, 2005

For us.

First swinging or the lifestyle was a way to have variety in sex, and to keep us both within the constraints of our marriage, more or less.

Next, it was erotic to see my wife turned on by another male or female. It was good to see her express and experiment in ways that we could not at home. For instance, I love the variety in pussy -- the sight, the taste, the texture. I also have found that I love to eat my wife after she has been "oiled" or to go down another woman when she is "creme" filler. Sexy, and you would never think so before you tried swinging or the lifestyle.

Third, we are both bi sexual. Some of the encounters were arousing in a socially acceptible way. You can swing in a bi sexual way at a club with no real problems. Our club even had a bi sexual night -- Thursdays.

Swinging has given our sexual expression a fuller outlet, and a wider range of experiences. Eileen was more reluctant and less interested in the beginning, and more interested now.

Otto & Eileen.

Deptydog · November 19, 2005

In our case, my Mrs. and I had started exploring our fantasies while we were dating. When we cooled down, we discussed ways to live them out. The Mrs. wanted to see me have a good time with several women at once (a typical male fantasy) and I love to watch her "get hers". Since we both LOVE sex, this lifestyle seemed like a good choice for us.

The first couple we swung with, we met on a phone chat line. We invited them to our wedding (a small wedding) and that's where we met them for the first time. We swung with them the second night after we were married. After a few less than pleasant experiences, we managed to find out how we "fit" in the lifestyle and we have been having a good time ever since.

fun4Ds · November 19, 2005

well for me (mr fun) the idea of having sex in a pile was pretty cool. so how do you get that in your relationship? well thats where swinging comes in .it is all about comunication with your partner,trust and respect.we have learned that from swingers boards and people we meet.we have learned alot about other people also but most of all about ourselves. i was all about seeing mrs fun having the time of her life no more holding back because of the way society has taught us to live. guess what? its nice to know that that comes back 2 fold. she is really concerned about my happiness also. thats a pretty good feeling. some how that ads to our normal life like our jobs, kids, hobbies ect.

MrXxotic · November 19, 2005

I grew up w/a small group of about 10 friends, most had both parents working and we spent a lot of time w/out adults. We were all about the same age. As we matured, we played together, all of us, sometimes as a group. It was normal for us to play w/the person we were with, even if it was a different person day to day. All straight sex, no jealousies. Assumed it to be normal.

This is the way Angel grew up also. She learned at an early age that sex and love are not always the same thing. She brought me into it because we shared secrets and fantasies in the bedroom. We mainly swing with single men because I enjoy her pleasure and it is a lot harder to find a couple.

meandher2go · November 27, 2005

My four reasons::

Variety

sex is fun

love to see HER with other guys having fun

sex is fun

mfmyeahbaby · November 27, 2005

Well my initial reason for ever thinking about swinging was my girlfriend at the time (now wife). She brought up the subject but not seriously at first and with a girlfriend of hers and not bi but for me to service her. Well that never happened but we did attempt a mfm with my friend (who I felt was non threatening and I never would appreciate the gift), that went off great and still to this very day is our choice for adult sex play (swinger style). So to answer your question I swinger because I truely love the pleasure my wife is giving and receiving. Not just that but our chosen player is truely considered by us to a perfect substitute me and can and should be enjoyed when it should be enjoyed. He not only respects her in every way but also respect me and my relationship with my wife (is part time sex playmate) and we love it that way. We've discovered that it is not only a sexual pleasure but a mental and ego boost as well, because she can fully feel free to indulge in her passions with both of us men together or seperate and that is by itself empowering, but add the fact the she has the pleasure of 2 men different in alot ways, giving her pleasure and being able to fully let go and enjoy that anyway she wants. SHE LOVES THAT

Nova · November 28, 2005

Wow - we're really in the minority.

For me it's all about lesbian sex. For whatever reason, my brain short-circuits when women kiss or get intimate. Mrs. Nova has fun with girls, but is more aroused by simply driving me crazy. Who am I to argue?