What is the big deal with single men?

[fredandwilma200 16]

Here is a question that I have! Why are single men so outed in this lifestyle? I have seen alot of couples that say NO WAY to single men! I was just curious about this thanks!

[VegasLee 1,486]

Many couples are in the lifestyle for other couples only.

 

I do feel that many give single men a bad rap. We have always welcomed single men into our parties and events. We found that given the chance most of them are very respectful and the ladies in our group have a blast with them. Once in awhile we get a bad apple but we have found we get just as many bad apples when dealing with "couples only" events also.

 

We hold parties during the lifestyles conventions in different areas. Our parties are normally the only one that has a few selected single men invited to it. Hand chosen by ladies in our group. Funny thing is that we end up having the busiest party at the convention. Seems that many couples that normally go for "couples only" find their way to our parties. ;-)

 

You have to remember. There is no real "rules" in this lifestyle except be true and honest with your spouse. Honesty above all else. Some like to play with couples only, others with other females, some with other males.

 

The part I find negitive is that those that do not like certain things within the lifestyle will say how bad those parts are. Just because something is different does not make it bad, just makes it different. Not all parts of the lifestyle or clubs or parties are for everyone.

[Guest Mr&Mrs-naughty]

Not all are opposed to single males.

 

That is what most of our encounters are.

 

Different things turn people on. For me it is double teaming Mrs naughty with another guy. And she likes being double teamed. So it is a win win for us..

 

We have made quite a few single males in our area quite happy.

 

We do the couples thing to but not as often.

 

So we (couples looking for single males) are out there you just have to keep on looking.

[hmr 25]

I have found that many couples feel single males are not 'real swingers' because they are single. Therefore they are excluded.(shouldn't that also apply to single bifems?) Just wondering....

 

Others feel as we do. They want to be the ones to contact the singles. At one time we had so many responses to our ad, we could not read them all, much less answer them. Not all ads that post for singles to not contact them automatically rule them out!! Many women enjoy MFM and what better way than with a single male?

[mokytag02 56]

We have met with many single men and have had a lot of fun with them. Some couples feel they have nothing to bring to the plate, we don't. One thing that bothers me(he) is the single guy who hits on my wife to meet alone when it is all spelled out in our profiles that we only meet as a couple or when we are in a chat room that it is okay for them to come on, and when they figure out it's her chatting, get as crude as possible and also think that everything including meeting, is automatic. We have a habit of wanting to get to know people before we meet them. This really pissies some guys off. The bad ones are few but they pretty much make it tough on the good ones. That's my take on it.

[Guest Mr&Mrs-naughty]

mok,

 

I agree completely.

 

A lot of single men start their conversation off with sex talk. That obviously is what we are looking for . But to have the first words out of their mouths to be "Do you want my cock in your ass" is not the way to get there. We exclude them as possibilities immediately. They have to be respectful and have to have a conversation that is not about sex first. If Mrs naughty gets comfortable enough to want to Fuck... I mean meet:lol: the person then some sex talk will come up. But that talk is mostly what she is not into. I also have to agree on the guy. If I get bad vibes then he is out. Even if mrs naughty thinks he is a candidate .

[mokytag02 56]

Mr & Mrs. Sounds like you have talked to some of the same guys we have. LOL We agree that both of us has to have a comfort level with anyone we meet or it doesn't happen. The Mrs. is new to all this and it took her a while to learn to blow off the guys who come on crude. She was afraid to piss anyone off. I told her the ball is in your court not theirs, they are coming into our house so to speak. They are joining our world.I also explain to them, before we meet face to face, that if they show my wife any disrespect the deal is off. I explain to them that I am sharing the most important person in my life with them and if they cannot show her the same respect that I do then they need to go away. Some of these guys don't realize that for every couple or single lady in this lifestyle there is about 200 single guys. We have one single guy who goes head hunting if another single guy is rude to my wife in chat. He realizes the problems a certain few can cause the rest fo the single guys.

[cek 16]

Perhaps it is best to give an example as to why.

 

I was in a chat room the other day and a guy (let's just call him steve) kept coming on and asking rude and suggestive things of a lady I was talking with (let's just call her jen).

 

Well steve never got it into his head that when "jen" said something and I responded, he did not need to jump right in.

 

She basically told him to "bug off" but he did not grasp that.

 

We went to a private chat and when we came back, he was gone. We made the agreement that if he came back we would not recognize him as existing.

 

It is that type of a single male that does not consider that it is a unit (man AND woman) that he is talking to that makes it very bad for the rest of us guys.

 

Yes, I have seen single females also ignore the feelings of the wife involved, but somehow it just seems to be more inconsiderate when the guy does it.

 

I have met up with couples that I became friends with, and if other situations in life had not taken me to a part of the country where I could not realistically see them often, it is safe to say we would have perhaps continued to this day our mutual meetings.

 

A note to any single guys reading this.

 

I do believe that if you are considerate of the feelings of the lady and the man in a couple situation at a party or other meeting, the word will get around.

 

A guy needs to be attractive, and that (I think) is more about how he talks with both of the couples, senses what they want and gives that, is honest, caring, sensitive, etc. than what "equipment" or "body shape" he might possess. As was said here, he is entering into the life of a couple, and so he must operate on their ground rules and seek their pleasure way above his.

 

It is all about honesty and no one being pushed into doing something they do not want to!

 

Don't get upset guys, just go along with it and be the very best "third party" to anyone that asks you to play. But first you need to be the best "third person" in a conversation. Don't make a bad first impression, I have done that to often in life, and it is almost impossible for some folks to forget how you came off first!

[De and Ci 19]

Any advice on finding single males-other than the "personal ads" route?

 

We would like to find some single guys "desperate" for sex. I think my wife would enjoy it. But the clubs here don't allow singles. Are conventional nightclubs a good way to find them?

[leftcoastcouple 32]

Quote

Originally posted by hmr

I have found that many couples feel single males are not 'real swingers' because they are single. Therefore they are excluded.(shouldn't that also apply to single bifems?) Just wondering....

 

Others feel as we do. They want to be the ones to contact the singles. At one time we had so many responses to our ad, we could not read them all, much less answer them. Not all ads that post for singles to not contact them automatically rule them out!! Many women enjoy MFM and what better way than with a single male?

Couldn't agree with you more, mrs. hmr. And why the resistance to ads, De and Ci?

 

We placed an ad, separate from our "couples" ad, stating plain and simple, we were going to be in town X on date Y and were looking for a single guy to play with--preference given to clean, down-to-earth and good-looking. We got so many responses that it was tough to reply to them all.

 

Probably 80% were real quality, if you were to trust the pics alone--guys my wife would have pointed out if were sitting in a bar and playing the "OK, who?" game. Probably 10% were just outstanding, and they were nice, seemingly responsible guys on follow-up, too. Were there jerks, including those who wouldn't take "no" for an answer? Sure. But that's why you screen carefully.

 

If based on Julie's poll about "Who do you swing/want to swing with" are running 25% single males, why the stigma? I don't get it. Are we just afraid to admit that single guys are OK? Is it latent homophobia, since there's no stigma to stating you're looking for a single woman? Or...what?

 

Makes no sense. You want a horny guy? Find a single guy. Simple. And with a little looking, the typical woman can have an above-average guy for the asking, based on numbers alone.

[gtj-fun 15]

I think whatever stigma may attach to single males in the lifestyle derives primarily from the large number that reply unsought to couples ads. The Mrs. and I have done MFM a number of times over the years, in part because it is so easy to hook up with a single male and she does enjoy the double teaming. It does get tiresome tho' sifting through large numbers of unsought single male ads and messages when our ad says "couples or sf", because that is what we are looking for - we don't really have to do much looking to find a single male!

[Spoomonkey 421]

Supply and demand...

 

Single men are out there - easy to find. Unfortunately, finding a really great single guy can be tough. They really don't "bring anything to the table" so to speak. Because of that, it takes some time to sift through the guys who are not physically appealing, not emotionally appealing and who are looking (whether they know it or not) to take from the table what the married guy brings...

 

We are really single-guy-friendly - much like the Naughtys - but every time we go to the club there are a dozen or more singles men milling about. If we choose to play with one of them, that leaves eleven feeling like the world just isn't being fair...

 

The funny thing is, like last night, we had a wonderful noisy time with a guy that Mrs Spoomonkey really was hot for. And - as we were leaving after - she got hit on a couple of times by single men who think (and here is where I don't understand the way single men think) that because she did one, she obviously would like to do them all.

 

And that is our answer - in short - we really enjoy single guys (we have mostly played with couples, but single guys are certainly welcome to play at Spoomonkey Ranch) but my sweet little wife can't fuck all of them...

[Guest Mr&Mrs-naughty]

The single males we have actualy gotten to the point of meeting have been respectful genuine guys who just wanted to fuck my wife.

 

We have had good luck so far. But the process is long before we meet. Many e-mails, IMs, a pic of him smiling (her thing) and finaly a phone call. A phone call is a MUST before meeting. But that goes for couples or singles.

 

Of course going to a club is a whole different story.........

[viper31631 15]

When I was swinging as a single male, before I become part of a permanent triad. I had no problem meeting couples. And once you get a reputation as a "good single" word spreads fast and you would be amazed at how many couples are accepting of you.

[sharp1 15]

I'm a Single Male, with about 10 yrs. experience in this "lifestyle". I have had a lot of fun with couples, and single females over that time and here are the reasons why.

 

I don't answer ads that are looking expressly for couples or females, after all that would be a waste of time. If I'm at a party and I happen to hook up with another couple that's great, if the choose another single guy, it won't break my heart.

 

I do have an ad running, and I DO answer all inquiries.

 

I am very respectful not only to others, but to myself too.

 

I am discreet, the best way to fuck up a good thing is to tell ANYONE about it!

 

I'm clean cut and good natured. I'm in this for fun just like everyone else.

 

Finally, please don't worry about us "Single Males" we're all big boys, and we'll be waiting for you when you want us!

[Guest Mr&Mrs-naughty]

Posted by Sharp1:

 

Quote

I'm a Single Male, with about 10 yrs. experience in this "lifestyle". I have had a lot of fun with couples, and single females over that time and here are the reasons why.

 

I don't answer ads that are looking expressly for couples or females, after all that would be a waste of time. If I'm at a party and I happen to hook up with another couple that's great, if the choose another single guy, it won't break my heart.

 

I do have an ad running, and I DO answer all inquiries.

 

I am very respectful not only to others, but to myself too.

 

I am discreet, the best way to fuck up a good thing is to tell ANYONE about it!

 

I'm clean cut and good natured. I'm in this for fun just like everyone else.

 

Finally, please don't worry about us "Single Males" we're all big boys, and we'll be waiting for you when you want us!

 

 

Mrs naughty wants to know when your coming to Texas!

 

 

 

[magnum 78]

Quote

Originally posted by fredandwilma200

Here is a question that I have! Why are single men so outed in this lifestyle? I have seen alot of couples that say NO WAY to single men! I was just curious about this thanks!

 

I have wondered the same thing...

 

I am a single male that has been swinging with a married couple "friends of mine" for about 3 years and I understand the situation and respect her and there marriage, I am not out to cause problems.

 

I would like to meet others to play with but find it difficult. I would like to find another lady that would like to develop a relationship. Anyhow, we are not all bad!

 

If you want to do a MFM thing without having someone to sit on the sideline, there is no better way to do that than with a single male.

[good times 991]

Originally posted by fredandwilma200

Here is a question that I have! Why are single men so outed in this lifestyle? I have seen alot of couples that say NO WAY to single men! I was just curious about this thanks!

 

We are one of those couples that are not into single males at all. It's not that we have had an abundance of bad experiances with single males, although we have had a few uncomfortable experiances at the clubs with single males that wouldn't take no for an answer or continued to lurk after we told them we weren't interested. For us, it is simply that we are only interested in playing with couples, in other words, if you don't come with a famale we aren't interested. I think one of the reasons that it would seem that single males are so outed is, as has been stated before, their is just so many of them compared to how many couples are interested in them. At the club we attend regularly the single male to couple ratio on non "couples only" nights is often higher than 5 to1. We have had enough unpleasant experiances with single males that we try to only go to the club on couples only night just because we don't like dealing with it. That being said, it is important to note that the majority of the single males at the club are respectfull and curtious but, at least for us, it only takes a couple of bad apples to spoil a good time, and their always seems to be one or two of those on any given night, even though the managers will toss them out when they notice they have become a problem.

[WesternSwing 504]

I don’t think single men are totally ousted, but many couples do seem to want to meet only couples (including us right now) or bi-women. My limited experience has been (and what we have based our opinion on) is the ego involved with some of the ads of single men and the number of email responses from single men we got. It seems like everybody wants to do my wife and I’m just a third wheel that they put-up with so they can get to her.

 

The other reason is ego. Allot of the personal ads from single men have nothing but a pic of their cock, and so many of them talk about how they can please my woman, like I can’t and this is why we are swinging. The attitude in their ad is that the husband is inadequate and we are calling in the “professional” to take care of what we can’t. Kind of like hiring a plumber or mechanic when the job is beyond our abilities.

 

At a party we went to recently a single guy there pulled this exact scenario, wanting cut-in on me doing oral on my wife because “you’re not doing it right”. I told him politely “no thanks” and he proceeded to give verbal instructions to me until she came.

 

We know not all single guys are like that (there were a couple more at the party that were complete gentlemen), but there are enough of the first type to turn allot of couples off to them.

 

My advice to single guys trying to get in with couples is to mellow-out the ego and let the couple call the shots.

[C&D 15]

We don't seem to have a lot of problems with single males if we by chance happen to meet one. After all that's how we got started and some of our best times have been with single guys.

 

Our profile however states that we are only looking for couples but that doesn't mean we will turn the single guy away. As long as he treats sleeping with my wife an honor and a privilege and not a quest.

[Guest Mr&Mrs-naughty]

WesternSwing,

 

We agree with the Ego thing.

 

If their profile is all about how great he is we move on.

 

Our decision is mainly based on his certifications. If he has been on for quite a while and has no certifications then he isnt even considered.

 

There is a reason he hasn't been certified. Can you say RED FLAG!

[curiousagain 326]

I think it's funny that some people will say they avoid single males because they have had problems with "a couple of them". Have you ever had problems with a couple or one of the people in a couple? If so would you avoid couples?

 

That being said, most couples just aren't looking for a single male for many reasons. Everybody has some things they are looking for and some things they avoid. It's just personal preferences. If a couple only wants to swing with couples it doesn't mean they dislike single males, that's just not what they're lookin' for. No need for anyone to take it personal.

 

If as a straight single male you are contacted by a couple with a bi male and you decline does that mean you are discriminating? NO, that is just not what you are in to, nothing personal, just not what you're looking for.

 

I don't understand why some single males think they are being discriminated against or avoided because a couple isn't asking them to play with them. It usually just isn't what they are looking for.

 

But, some couples are and you should be concentrating your efforts there rather than wasting your time and risking alienating those couples that aren't.

 

Play safe and play careful

[C&D 15]

And that's precisely what our profile is for. We're actively seeking other couples but it doesn't mean we wont consider a single male or female for that matter. And not to stereotype but single males are a little easier to find in everyday life where couples are a little harder to come by and that's the purpose of our profile.

[curious24 17]

De and Ci said:

Any advice on finding single males-other than the "personal ads" route?

 

We would like to find some single guys "desperate" for sex. I think my wife would enjoy it. But the clubs here don't allow singles. Are conventional nightclubs a good way to find them?

you could look around on here and do a search on the single guys on here and read about them.

 

but I'm a single guy in Austin and I really don't know of any conventional way to go about finding a guy. Maybe go to sky or element downtown, dance with a few, and then hit them up afterwards. assuming that you want to be with someone in their 20's or so. Then again you won't really know them.

 

Other than those two options i don't know what to tell you.

[HotCoupleGnS 21]

Hubby & I don't look for single males b/c we have already had quite a few of those experiences. We are looking for some couple experiences. We are however considering looking for single males again. But the biggest is a single male that acts in ways he shouldn't. We have had a few that try to "get" me. Hubby hates those. Not for fear I will do anything, but for fear he might have to kick there butt!

[WesternSwing 504]

Here is a question that I have! Why are single men so outed in this lifestyle? I have seen alot of couples that say NO WAY to single men! I was just curious about this thanks!

 

We've felt that way, but our attitude is changing a bit. We have met a really nice, respectful, single guy that we may bring into our play for my wife's MFM fantasies.

 

But on the other side of it at a house party 3-weeks ago my wife went away from the party to sit down in the living room of the house, away from the loud music and to rest in the quiet for a few minutes. When she opened her eyes one of the few single guys at the party was standing over her with his dick dangling in her face. She went ballistic on him. He couldn't understand why.

 

At another party my wife was playing with another woman in a bedroom and she told me to go get the camera. When I returned there were two single guys in the bedroom watching, uninvited. I said "Hi, I'm her husband you are...? Great, now get out." They couldn't understand why either.

 

At another party... Wait, come to think of it every problem we've had at parties have involved single guys. :rollseyes

 

Our big turn-off has been the attitude it seems some single guys have, especially in thier ads on SLS, AFF, etc. Some have this whole "I can please you like you husband never has" attitude, like we are looking to bring in the back-up Quarterback because I can't make a touchdown. That may just be a newbie single guy attitude mistake though. It may be what some want, but it is a huge turn-off for us.

 

I think when you find a good one, though, it makes all the difference. I know it has in our attitude toward them.

 

Mr. WS

[EternallySingle 32]

Horror stories aside, I think it all boils down to what do the majority of couples and single women look for when they are online. In my experience it is much easier to meet people in general if you can see their reactions in real time. Because of that, its real easy for a couple or single woman looking for a single man to find one they connect with in under five minutes. In that time a few careful questions and comments can tell you everything from when he next gets paid to when his mother graduated high school. And you can tell how truthful he is being.

 

Given the stereotype of "single men usually try to fuck anything in a skirt", many couples will be more comfortable approaching a single man in a regular nightclub or bar for sex than a single woman(the only time that misconception works to our advantage). That also makes it much easier to find single men willing to fulfill a threesome fantasy than a woman. Go out of town, pick up the local "lady's man" and you're good to go.

 

Bottom line: The internet isn't the best place to meet single men if unless you are willing to actually devote a fair amount of time getting to know them. A lot of new couples (and most single women) are not willing to devote that kind of time to wade through the bad single men to find the good ones, you get a lot of disappointment on both sides. The couples with experience with single men? They usually have two or three they can call, so they too are usually not looking to meet more.

[Spoomonkey 421]

Our big turn-off has been the attitude it seems some single guys have, especially in thier ads on SLS, AFF, etc. Some have this whole "I can please you like you husband never has" attitude, like we are looking to bring in the back-up Quarterback because I can't make a touchdown.

 

I am not sure that I totally agree with you, Mr WS...

 

The way I read those ads is that what they really think is that you are looking for a way to trade up to the first pick so you can draft a STUD of a quarterback, becuase the cagey veteran is about to retire and move into announcer's booth... Or maybe he is just too stupid to know how to "drive the field" anymore because of his constant concussions...

 

Actually - I do agree with you - I just thought the image of "back-up quarterback" was a little too humble for what we run into on-line.

 

Spoomonkey

[WesternSwing 504]

 

Mr. WS

[Rockon 19]

I have attended several culbs as a single male. Each time I kept to myself and was polite. Each time I was aproached by an older lady whose hubby liked to watch.

I have had only positive experiences swinging single. I usually hang out at the bar or at a table in a trafic area.

My experiences with couples has always been great, I have met some real friends and had some great times that I will always remember!

[curious24 17]

The couples with experience with single men? They usually have two or three they can call, so they too are usually not looking to meet more.

this actually made me think of a couple of things you could do also.. if you are looking online you could join say sls and look at single men there and look for ones that have been certified by others...

 

you could also contact other members online who have had single men join them.. ask them if they would mind if they could recomend some single guys that are members.. that way you could start a dialoge with them etc.

[EternallySingle 32]

this actually made me think of a couple of things you could do also.. if you are looking online you could join say sls and look at single men there and look for ones that have been certified by others...

 

you could also contact other members online who have had single men join them.. ask them if they would mind if they could recomend some single guys that are members.. that way you could start a dialoge with them etc.

 

This reminds me of one of the little factoids I discovered in the woman's studies class I took way back when. Sixty to seventy percent of the eligible women date only twenty to twenty five percent of the eligible men. Why? The ones that everyone has heard about are the only ones that get contacted. The rest may or may not meet anyone until either someone new moves to the area or they move. Then they become the new guy everyone wants to meet and gets one chance to become one of that twenty percent.

 

That, in my opinion, is the only problem looking for people, single men, single women, or couples, based on whether or not they are certified. True, single men who are certified may be the cream of the crop, but in swinging, it truly is a "Its not what you know but who you know" situation. In that way, the certification is really a hindrance to single men. It will take an extremely brave couple or single woman to contact a single man without a certification and lets face it. If noone is willing to be first, the man will never be certified, no matter how great he is in person.

[austxmark 41]

I thought it was an interesting point made about the "certified" single male. It ties into the "discreet" single male. For me I always feel like if a certification is made its open for god and everyone to read that I have been with that cpl..which is sort of non-discreet. But since a single male with no certifications sets up red flags I should display them. mmm..guess this is a no win thing. I usually suppress my certifications for the sake of privacy..maybe I will display them in the future. Sometimes trying to do the right things is doing the wrong thing .

[curious24 17]

...it truly is a "Its not what you know but who you know" situation....

is this how it is with just about everything in life? you can't get credit without credit but you need to have credit if you want credit. it sucks you just need to go to someone who doesn't care if you have credit or not and sign up with them to get it going

 

I thought it was an interesting point made about the "certified" single male. It ties into the "discreet" single male. For me I always feel like if a certification is made its open for god and everyone to read that I have been with that cpl..which is sort of non-discreet. But since a single male with no certifications sets up red flags I should display them. mmm..guess this is a no win thing. I usually suppress my certifications for the sake of privacy..maybe I will display them in the future. Sometimes trying to do the right things is doing the wrong thing.

woh that's a good point. never thought about that.. but then again if you are on a personals site for swingers are you really being very "discreet" in the first place?

[LIZA 20]

I would be open to a single man, but it has to be the right guy and we have never found him

 

My experience is men are either married and sneaking around (most common), are horny guys who think this is a way to get laid fast and with no strings (the conversation is sexual within 2 minutes) or they are kind of outcast types who are having a hard time finding a one on one relationship

 

so while i never say never they are not what we seek out

[magnum 78]

Hubby & I don't look for single males b/c we have already had quite a few of those experiences. We are looking for some couple experiences. We are however considering looking for single males again. But the biggest is a single male that acts in ways he shouldn't. We have had a few that try to "get" me. Hubby hates those. Not for fear I will do anything, but for fear he might have to kick there butt!

 

We are not all bad, I was recently invited to play with a couple that usually does not play with single men either, we had a great time, took some fun photos.

 

I have the mind set that I am not out to "get" the wife but rather to have fun. Maybe you should look for experienced "single" men that understand that the couple "wife" is not looking for a new boy friend but rather a "cock" to use for a few hours of fun.

 

I am not out to be a "home wrecker", rather I just enjoy myself and make sure the "wife/GF" has a good time.

 

I am appreciative that I have been "invited" to play in the first place.

 

Magnum

[TNT 1,155]

Here is a question that I have! Why are single men so outed in this lifestyle? I have seen alot of couples that say NO WAY to single men! I was just curious about this thanks!

 

As others have said there are numerous couples who enjoy single men. The good ones are out there just sometimes hard to find. There are also couples that just don't get into single men at all.

 

One of the things we have seen where single men are concerned is that it's not neccesarily the "couple" as much as it is the man in the couple. We know a few couples who are totally against single men and it's mostly the husband...his reasoning is that there is not another woman there for him to play with if it's a MFM threesome, therefore he refuses to even consider it. We do find it funny that when asked about a FMF threesome, this same man is totally for that :rollseyes .

 

Now no flaming here, we just happen to know a few couples who actually think this way...the men think Ted is crazy because we enjoy MFM threesomes.

 

I think VegasLee summed it up pretty well...

You have to remember. There is no real "rules" in this lifestyle except be true and honest with your spouse. Honesty above all else. Some like to play with couples only, others with other females, some with other males.

 

The part I find negitive is that those that do not like certain things within the lifestyle will say how bad those parts are. Just because something is different does not make it bad, just makes it different. Not all parts of the lifestyle or clubs or parties are for everyone.

 

Teresa

[1freakincpl 15]

we dont have a problem with being with single men. The thing that we found is that most single me are only out to have sex. We want lasting friendships. We have sex all the time and are both happy with each other.... the only reason we invite cpls, females, and men in out room is because its exciting and we love excitement..... we just ask that u atleast try to be friends with both sides of the relationship so we can all have fun

[Adidasv40 18]

I as a bi-m have replied to numerous profiles on sites, that state nothing about bi men or single males (good or bad).. and have been called a fag numerous times.

 

Alot of guys in general, str8, bi or gay.. are really persistent, or only care about the woman.

 

BUt one thing i have noticed, is that homophobia is still very prevalent in males and very decreased in females. That is a large factor to take into consideration. And even the most homophobic man, loves seeing two fine ladies together.

 

I will agree with the sex only type of guys, but i think that goes for both sexes. I just think it's more welcome of a female to be that way. For me though, i don't think i could have sex with anyone who i didn't get to know a little bit first, hold a conversation, and be just as relaxed in as out of the bedroom.

 

I have found i have far better luck with purely bi couples, bi-m and bi-f. (or gay men/straight women)

[BodyScape02 21]

I thought it was an interesting point made about the "certified" single male. It ties into the "discreet" single male. For me I always feel like if a certification is made its open for god and everyone to read that I have been with that cpl..which is sort of non-discreet. But since a single male with no certifications sets up red flags I should display them. mmm..guess this is a no win thing. I usually suppress my certifications for the sake of privacy..maybe I will display them in the future. Sometimes trying to do the right things is doing the wrong thing .

 

 

I think you should display at least one or two... I sought out a single man in our neck of the woods and we really enjoy his friendship and our playtime with him. We chose him because He was unique in that he was a true gentleman. It didn’t hurt that he has incredible quarterback next door looks either.

 

Well anyways, He wrote us a certification that still makes me blush and I strive to live up to. People click from my certification over to the one we gave him. Heck we wrote his first certification but not his last…lol…He is now busier than we are...I enjoy kidding him about it allot!

 

 

What was said about cream of the crop rising...is true. If a couple sends you a certification it means they think enough of you to be willing to go public with their assessment...use it...

~Cat

[TNT 1,155]

What was said about cream of the crop rising...is true. If a couple sends you a certification it means they think enough of you to be willing to go public with their assessment...use it...

~Cat

 

 

I agree with this...we would never give a single male a certification unless he was a true gentleman in and out of bed.

 

Teresa

[EternallySingle 32]

If someone gives you a certification, post it. It can't hurt. Not having one does hurt. Those couples and single women on the fence about meeting single men are rarely going to take a chance on someone even if they have a well written profile, and some will delete an unsolicited email without even opening it. To them, there is something wrong with a single man who isn't certified, even if its only that nobody ELSE has given him a chance and tried to get to know him. If you are a single man (online and in real life) and it appears that noone knows you, you are less likely to get known. If even one person knows you and says good things about you, everyone they know will want to see if they can be your friend too.

 

Its not fair, its not right, but thats life.

[magnum 78]

I agree with this...we would never give a single male a certification unless he was a true gentleman in and out of bed.

 

Teresa

 

If I get a certification, I will surely wear it proudly.

 

Magnum

[BradAndJanet 70]

If someone gives you a certification, post it. It can't hurt. Not having one does hurt. Those couples and single women on the fence about meeting single men are rarely going to take a chance on someone even if they have a well written profile ....

We agree with that and can't think of a case where a certification would ever be a bad thing. It will give a guy an advantage with us.

 

-B

[n02deep 15]

I can easily see everyone's point on this subject. I am now divorced and have found that it is VERY difficult to be accepted now that I don't have my partner. We used to party with a few couples that were friends of ours but not with anyone of any "groups" or such.

 

I find that as a single male, there are few couples or single fems looking for single males and that you get very few replies to your responses. I've recently moved to Atlanta and have been looking at the clubs (those few that allow single males) in the area and am amazed at the very biased membership and "nightly" fees for single males. I'm skeptical of whether to spend the money to join and attend because of the feeling of being pre-judged because I'm single.

[pasfs01 15]

I am a single guy, and I have tried to try this lifestyle at least to satisfy this curisity. I am clean businessman, make good money and educated. However, I have never have an opportunity to try it. I have been in chatrooms, personals, etc. and just because I am a single male I am automatically excluded. I don't even get a hi. To have sex I dont need to be part of this, I can just probably go to a downtown bar, or go to an exgirlfriend and ask for it. This is something that I think goes a little further than that, but So far I have not been invited to get a single slice of the pay.

[adventureUS 15]

I am married straight male and do not mind shareing my wife with another man. In fact

I find it very exciteing. But Men willing to screw your wife are a dime a dozen. Dont take this personal But any one of my guy friends would come home with me and screw the wife. How ever it is much harder to finds couples or females to play with. You join the clubs to find somene that you cant meet elsewhere. I am not bothered by single men at the clubs just not interested.

[Some4mealot4her 15]

I totally agree w/ adventure....my wife is 37 and our 17 yr old daughter gets pissed cause the seniors at high school sing her that "Stacy's Mom...has got it going on.." song.... only they insert my daughters name for Stacy...my wife is hot...we play w/ those who can FULLY reciprocate or very close males (like my married brother..who has helped when his wife wasn't "in the swing mood"...heh heh)... my lover LOVES to get tag teamed more than anything else...but SHE dictates terms...and she would NOT want anything to do with a single guy/ unattached...too many questions...who ya been with...what's your reason for not bringing a gal to the 'party' ???

 

My advice...? Find an open-minded woman who wants to take care of you first...but is willing to be jealousy free...and bring her along slowly...on her terms...

 

we guys are the true dogs...women should be treated like fine works of art.

[SpinOX 24]

We are a straight couple, and our reasons for not wanting single males or single females are my wife nor myself want to be left out while we play with people.

[Bluespruce1 706]

We actually are fine with single guys as long as they aren’t pushy or arrogant. Sometimes we invite them

to our room to watch and masturbate - other times I want to be the center of attention. One night in the sex swing room we left the door open. We had three guys join us. They took turns with me and it was incredible. My husband also likes seeing guys fuck me if they are younger and have bigger cocks. He’s very comfortable simply watching from time to time.