Are we swingers or something else?

[Funlatincouple 44]

We been married over 15 years. In that time we have played with only two couples. In both cases they were good friends we’ve known for years. Are we considered swingers or something else? Just want to know if there is another term that best describes us? 

Edited February 23, 2022 by Funlatincouple

[realcplub2 513]

My friend, why are you looking to define yourselves?

 

The experiences you have had, were they enjoyable to you both? Did the other partners enjoy themselves? 

 

How we define ourselves within our relationships, is the first step. Do you both enjoy what you have done, and want to do more, or find new play partners?

 

Here is the term we coined years ago.. and you are more than welcome to borrow

 

We enjoy SEXPLORATION... 

[GoldCoCouple 4,065]

Swingers is a broad term that covers a wide variety of sexual activity, but all of it has to do with consensual non-monogamy. That you have played with two other couples, regardless to the time since or between, qualifies you as swingers.

[Funlatincouple 44]

Great feedback and insight, thanks GoldCoCouple & realcplub2. The question of "Are we swingers" has been presented as a conversation piece a handful of times over the years when we're all together. Fun conversation only.  Its rooted in the fact that the my girls just don't like the label "swingers" and they're always looking for an alternative. They believe its to rough, broad and portrays something bad. I've actually defended it with something similar to what GoldCoCouple said, AKA The term covers a variety of activities but ultimately its something unique and special to everyone.   Hell, one of the reasons we joined this site was to listen to those unique experiences. 

In a world where it seems like there's a specific name for every individual niche, I guess I was fishing for an alternate for the girls. Again just for fun.  BTW per the girls, their niche is that they truly love each other and husbands and couldn't/wouldn't hook up with anyone else unless that existed. Both BI obviously. Pain in my ass really, but that's a whole other story.  They know they're swingers, just looking for a posh name for it. 

 

Trust me, we truly enjoy our experiences, while perhaps unique in its own way, I wouldn't trade it for the world. We truly feel lucky and it's brought us together even closer.   

Edited February 24, 2022 by Funlatincouple

[GoldCoCouple 4,065]

You can SAY you are whatever you want to say (not meaning specifically you, but it sounds like 'the girls'). If you don't want to be called 'swingers', then don't call yourself that. While the term 'consensual non-monogamy' is harder to slip into a conversation, it might be more accurate. Also, it sounds like polyamorous would maybe even more accurate:

 

characterized by or involved in the practice of engaging in multiple romantic (and typically sexual) relationships, with the consent of all the people involved.

 

Bottom line is you can call yourself whatever you want to. I used to drive race cars and while I haven't done it for years, still like to be known as a 'former race car driver'. I also loved to play golf, so now I'm also a 'double swinger'.

[Funlatincouple 44]

Polyamorous… hoop there it is!!  Wow that’s perfect. I knew there had to be something more specific.  That’s us no doubt. Well, I’m/we’re (hubbies) are ready to meet new people. Been > 3 years now together and while awesome, the excitement is fading some. Now I fantasize meeting a new couple. A new couple for all 4 of us. Easier said than done under these conditions but something to chase. 👍🏻👍🏻

Edited February 25, 2022 by Funlatincouple

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

There are closed "groups" where there are several couples who agree to play only with each other. This helps to limit STD transmission. Of course, in the process, such groups of couples tend to get closer and closer. I think the more times you have sex with someone, the more likely you are to develop emotions for that person. That tends towards polyamory, the (to some people 'radical') notion that you can be in love with more than one person at a time without sacrificing your love for anyone else.

 

My wife and I aren't averse to this, and we might be in the beginning stages of forming a group such as that now. We'll see. In the meantime, we're just having fun with no expectations.

[hunterdonNJcpl 1,388]

Yep. Swingers.