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The wife finds men on different sites without seeing much more than a profile picture. She has a few messages between contact and meets. She said looks aren’t everything.


When I look for a woman I have to be physically attracted to her.


My wife says she meets for the sex, I meet for sex and to go out.


Do you meet people you aren’t physically attracted to? 

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No we do not meet people we are not attracted to!  For us attraction is an important part of wanting to have sex with other people.  If we are not attracted to them then we do not see the point in having sex with them.  We already are having sex with someone we are attracted to whenever we want with each other so no reason to do it with people we are not.

 

Physical attraction is just the start though!  If they have a bad attitude or personality we are not going to find them attractive either. The lifestyle is not a full time thing for us and we choose to be picky about who we do and do not play with.  Quality experiences over quantity.  We are not interested in playing with people that don’t feel the same way either.  No one should be taking one for the team.

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Attraction…sure.  But for us the attraction is personality, attitude, humor, sense of adventure etc etc.

 

we have been very fortunate the people we have met over the years.  Blessed.

 

many we have been great friends to this day.  Decades of friendship.

 

some of the best gifts in life come in plain wrapping.

 

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She claims Variety attracts her. Then the I already have the best looking. Made me laugh. 
 

I am reminded that our open pleasures is not leading to long term relationships True even if I have had been seeing a woman for years a few times a year. 
 

She meets men for sex and claims she has had great sex with men others would not say are attractive. Plenty of one time meetings. For years we kept our non-secretive meetings secret. We didn’t share details. Now we do. She let me watch as she made contacts on a cheaters site and a dating app, the kind where you swipe left or right. She also shared old messages and pictures of men. I couldn’t put a type on her meetings, many looked out of shape, some looked like me. That’s when I told her that the women I meet are normally fit, except one woman in Omaha. I pulled up her picture, overweight big butt   Point taken. 

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First time out looks counted. We didn’t bother answering those who weren’t attractive. Good looking first time and no personality. We have learned to enjoy people instead of being impressed by looks. I will add, if you are completely turned off by the physical part, most likely you will not give them a chance. 

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I think what we have learned over the years that we have been in the lifestyle is to not be so quick to judge.  Some our favorite playmates are people we did not think were our type.  We were not initially attracted (or one of us was not) but after spending time getting to know them they became attractive.  Attraction is more than simply good looks and this took me a while to figure out.  People who are kind, warm and friendly are very attractive and usually a lot of fun to play with! 

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We are attracted to people we enjoy being with on a social level. Our first was with people we met on vacation with no intention to sleep with them. To us they were attractive in that they were fun loving and our initial thoughts were as friends. 

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We don’t arrange to meet people we don’t find physically attractive from their photos. It’s a whole different situation if we find ourselves talking with them at a club or party. Then other things can become more attractive to us than just their physical appearance.

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On 3/15/2022 at 9:41 AM, NC_Seniors said:

We don’t arrange to meet people we don’t find physically attractive from their photos. It’s a whole different situation if we find ourselves talking with them at a club or party. Then other things can become more attractive to us than just their physical appearance.

I the Mrs. is much more selective "online" but at parties/clubs/house parties, I'm known that a sense of humor and charm will have me wet and ready.  Just a weird thing with me, and I've played wiht men that I wouldn't have picked out on a swing site.  But they made me laugh, they were really smart or charming. 

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Attraction is super important to me but I can be attracted to a person's mind or personality.  I can even be super into the situation or scenario.  For instance there have been times where I slept with an average looking guy just because of how insanly much he was into me and he was so nice.  I've also slept with a few men in my life because it was their birthday and I think people should be able to have sex on their birthday.  Since they were really nice to me or super charming and didn't have anyone, I gave them the world's best birthday present.  My vagina on their dick and my boobs in their face! 

Edited by Aphroditee
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