Son found out and resents us.

[distraughtparents 7]

Somebody on reddit recommended to come here.

Our son(23M) was returning one of our bags we left at his house a week ago. He decided to return it late at night last Saturday. Our "party" ended and we had people leaving. Apparently, when he reached out front door we had couples leaving and talking about the party. My wife opened the door in shock. He threw the bag on the floor "Here's your stuff, sorry if I interrupted your orgy." My wife, as usual started blowing up his phone. My wife had the phone on speaker. He picked up the fourth time and "Mom we can talk about this on Friday at my place but I want to be left alone for this week.

Friday came and we were sitting at his place. He let out a lot of his frustrations. He said "You guys were basically gone every other weekend when I was 16 years old. Was the only time you guys were at home was because you didn't have any fuck buddies to suck and fuck?" I told him to watch the way he spoke to us and that we did still spent time on the days we didn't go nor we gone for the whole weekend. He responds "Yeah name one time you guys did anything with me on an individual basis? You guys were attached to the hip basically. I was actually jealous of your relationship. How fucked up is that! I used to think it's nice and all how much you love each other but couldn't show me the same amount of love and attention. I used to get sick seeing you snuggle with each other like teenagers whenever we used to watch a movie together. You used to tease me about it but you had no idea how I felt inside." I responded with telling him that a romantic relationship and a parent child relationship are completely different. He gets pissed off and said" Don't insult my intelligence. I know that. It's still doesn't change you guys cared more about each other. I've seen how girlfriend's parents love on her. I used to get jealous. By the way, mom, yes my girlfriend isn't a big fan of yours. She doesn't respect you as my parents. The reason I didn't share how I felt when I was at home because it felt humiliating."

My wife starts bawling in tears and starts begging for forgiveness while reaching out for a hug. He rebukes and calls her a whore. I started seeing red and I was up in his face telling him to watch his mouth. He then responds with saying "What are you going to do man-whore. I shouldn't be calling you a man. Get the fuck out of my house before I lose control."

 

My wife has called out for going to work tomorrow and today. She hasn't left the bed and is crying. I've been crying all night. My son hates my guts and I don't know what to do.

*Note: there's alot more cursing, so paraphrased the stuff he said

[Billygoat 445]

Hhmmm.  Not sure what you are looking or asking for.

 

every parent and child is a bit unique.  Most children have a degree of earned respect when it comes to older as well as other adults.  
 

certainly not enough here to play family psychologist or counselor.  
 

I will say our experience with hundreds of couples a single parents with older teen and young adult children does not come remotely close to this scenario.   
 

But again each family relationship is different.
 

wish you all the best.