Who are the people we meet?

[MidLifeFun 148]

We moved to a new state leaving friends for only occasional visits. We finally went against our view on meeting new friends online and put our profile on a popular site. 
Meeting a great new friend, different background from us, different customs, similar age, similar aged children, a little younger, we had a fabulous evening talking and having a plenty of laughs. We exchanged our real names and address which we did give us second thoughts for no real reason. 
 

Our question to this group, how soon do you give out personal information? 
Secondly is it proper to Google or do a search on them? 
We are honest with nothing to hide so they will not find any dark hidden life if they searched us. 

[TricianMike 788]

We don’t always know the names or remember the names of those we meet and once they are gone we don’t care. Not sure if anyone we met for a one time thing ever asked our last name even though we use our real names checking into hotels. 
 

20 hours ago, MidLifeFun said:

Secondly is it proper to Google or do a search on them? 

Can’t say if it’s proper, it’s human nature. The few times we put a name in the search bar we never found anything strange. 
Once we met someone who gave us his business card that said he did home improvements that we checked out. 

[SAMnTINA 362]

We always know when we get a call and someone gives their first name and city it's a lifestyle friend. 

[MidwestHoneys 359]

I only Google myself

[PeeTWheatstraw 122]

I get really paranoid when it comes to sharing my personal information with people that I meet in the lifestyle. Have had a couple of bad experiences myself and heard stories from many other people that also had bad experiences with people they have met online. But I will admit that Im not consistent with it at all. 

 

At times, I feel like I have a really good connection with someone and I will divulge more personal information about myself the first time we meet. Others times I am really guarded because of something the person said when I talked to them. I use a fake name, google voice for my phone calls, and almost never invite them to my house. I have always assumed that this is what other people do too. Maybe not. As I stated, Im paranoid.

 

Even as a single guy, you can never be too careful. But then again, sometimes it is the danger and anonymity of it all that is the attraction. 

 

[AndrewandAnn 360]

We cannot imagine meeting people with the intention of having sex without knowing a great deal about them and vice versa. To go in "blind" strikes us as being foolhardy in the extreme. The medical risks alone rule it out.

 

We know some people think differently, so we are not trying to be insulting. But, we cannot relate to that thinking at all.

[MidLifeFun 148]

2 hours ago, AndrewandAnn said:

We cannot imagine meeting people with the intention of having sex without knowing a great deal about them and vice versa. To go in "blind" strikes us as being foolhardy in the extreme. The medical risks alone rule it out.

 

We know some people think differently, so we are not trying to be insulting. But, we cannot relate to that thinking at all.

How do you find out more about the people? 
We are sure that people lie on the sites and don’t take anything as gospel. We are first trying to meet online knowing it is creepy to look for sex that way. We are not finding many others in our new location so we are resorting to meeting strangers. 

[AndrewandAnn 360]

On 8/8/2022 at 4:38 PM, MidLifeFun said:

How do you find out more about the people? 
We are sure that people lie on the sites and don’t take anything as gospel. We are first trying to meet online knowing it is creepy to look for sex that way. We are not finding many others in our new location so we are resorting to meeting strangers. 

You find out more about people by asking questions and creating an open dialogue. Talk is cheap. And it is effective. 

 

How to ensure you are talking to a "real" couple? When we were on-line (we are not any longer), we employed a variety of simple strategies and tactics to ensure we were talking to genuine people. After a certain stage of dialogue when everyone expressed interest, we asked they send us a photo of them clothed, holding a hand written note saying hello to us, dated, with a copy of a daily newspaper with the same date, and we would do the same for them. Of course, that was a while ago, when most people actually subscribed to a daily newspaper. Lol... Anyway, you get the idea. You need to establish a simple method to determine if the person/people on the other end of the line is/are genuine or fake. The earlier in the process you do it, the better. No sense wasting time on fakes.

 

Yes, looking for sexual partners on-line has its creepy side. You do your best to avoid the creeps and keep it clean by being smart and going slow. "Trust, but verify", President Ronald Reagan famously said.

[cplnluv1 874]

2 hours ago, AndrewandAnn said:

After a certain stage of dialogue when everyone expressed interest, we asked they send us a photo of them clothed, holding a hand written note saying hello to us, dated, with a copy of a daily newspaper with the same date, and we would do the same for them.

Today you just have to FaceTime no need for pictures or proof that it’s a teen spoofing you. FaceTime just proves you are in communication with real people, it doesn’t prove they are married, or thrives or worse. Other than the internet search we have noticed telltale signs people give off. 

[Baconheads 437]

On 8/7/2022 at 5:32 AM, TricianMike said:

We don’t always know the names or remember the names of those we meet and once they are gone we don’t care. Not sure if anyone we met for a one time thing ever asked our last name even though we use our real names checking into hotels. 
 

Can’t say if it’s proper, it’s human nature. The few times we put a name in the search bar we never found anything strange. 
Once we met someone who gave us his business card that said he did home improvements that we checked out. 

Lifestyle or not, it's nice to have a good handyman!

[TricianMike 788]

On 8/15/2022 at 12:44 PM, Baconheads said:

Lifestyle or not, it's nice to have a good handyman!

I could make a joke about his tools 

[EastInWest 1,524]

On 8/7/2022 at 7:32 AM, TricianMike said:

Can’t say if it’s proper, it’s human nature. The few times we put a name in the search bar we never found anything strange. 
Once we met someone who gave us his business card that said he did home improvements that we checked out. 

I firmly believe that the rule of etiquette on this is the same as it is in every other avenue of life: we have Google now, and we're going to use it, but we're supposed to have the good social judgment to, for official purposes, pretend we did not.

[njbm 2,901]

We have never Googled a lifestyle partner.
We have Googled friends and relatives and found out that they were dead, arrested, etc.  

[ROCKlandCpl 452]

I now don’t feel as bad knowing others did a search on others they know. I thought someone I met was accomplished not a mass murderer who lurked for unsuspecting book readers.