couplers 4,638 Posted August 13, 2022 (edited) How much time do you spend per week on average having sex? Not planning for it or posting, but actually playing. For me, it's about 45 minutes weekdays (15 minutes in the morning, 30 at night) and 90 minutes on weekend days. That equals 6.75 hours per week. Is this above or below average? (We're not in a rut, but with our lives we sort of have a routine.) Edited August 13, 2022 by couplers Quote Share this post Link to post
Fundamental Law 2,885 Posted August 13, 2022 The answer depends on how you define "having sex". Does it include solo fantasy and play time? What about the intimacies of showering together, making out without he intention of either person having an orgasm? What about foreplay time, which for us involves a lot of teasing and lead-up? As a friend of ours said several decades ago about her own marriage, "foreplay is 24 x 7"; where does that end and actual sex begin? No, you are not in a rut. It's how you have found balance in your lives. Quote Share this post Link to post
PeterJ 948 Posted August 13, 2022 Kathy and I spend a total of six to eight hours a week in regular every-other-day (to give her busy a rest and avoid soreness) sexual interludes. We are in our mid 70s and have been together for 35 years. Kathy prefers late afternoon sex and because she is retired and I work from home with a flexible schedule, we don’t have to wait for late evening bedtime when we are tired and lacking mid-day energy. My calculated time begins begins when we start disrobing and continues until we get out of bed to begin preparing dinner. After three and a half decades we are wired well together and both quite efficient at reaching orgasm with one another. With the aid of a vibe strategically placed Kathy generally reaches a first orgasm within five minutes of our first kiss. There’s little variation in what we do, which is fine with both of us. For her sex is about the orgasm and the bonding; I get the variety I enjoy with other partners. (Although the pandemic has sharply reduced my activities with others.) 1 3 Quote Share this post Link to post
couplers 4,638 Posted August 13, 2022 2 hours ago, Fundamental Law said: The answer depends on how you define "having sex". You're correct, and since I started this thread, I'll make the rules. 2 hours ago, Fundamental Law said: Does it include solo fantasy and play time? Yes, but fantasy alone (watching porn) doesn't count, you need to be playing with yourself. 2 hours ago, Fundamental Law said: What about the intimacies of showering together, making out without he intention of either person having an orgasm? Intimacy time counts, but only if it leads to one or both orgasming. 2 hours ago, Fundamental Law said: What about foreplay time, which for us involves a lot of teasing and lead-up? No, there has to be on-going sexual stimulation (pussy, dick, bum, tits) working towards an O, albeit slowly. Quote Share this post Link to post
couplers 4,638 Posted August 13, 2022 (edited) 41 minutes ago, PeterJ said: There’s little variation in what we do, which is fine with both of us. 2 hours ago, Fundamental Law said: No, you are not in a rut. It's how you have found balance in your lives. Pretty much how we see it. It's not that we're old, we're in our mid-30s busy. But with five in our poly family, the three of us women bi and sharing an outside boyfriend occasionally, it's not boring. We're open to other adventures, but we're all choosy and cautious. 41 minutes ago, PeterJ said: For her sex is about the orgasm and the bonding That's the way it is for all of us and why we are so regular. Sometimes only one of us may be horny, but when one of us starts, it kindles the desire in the others very easily. Many times after work I've said to myself, "No sex tonight." Then I end up having a wonderful time. Edited August 13, 2022 by couplers 1 2 Quote Share this post Link to post
Fundamental Law 2,885 Posted August 13, 2022 1 hour ago, PeterJ said: We are in our mid 70s and have been together for 35 years. Kathy prefers late afternoon sex and because she is retired and I work from home with a flexible schedule, we don’t have to wait for late evening bedtime when we are tired and lacking mid-day energy With the aid of a vibe strategically placed Kathy generally reaches a first orgasm within five minutes of our first kiss. There’s little variation in what we do, which is fine with both of us. For her sex is about the orgasm and the bonding; We are a few years younger but have been together 48. Mrs FL prefers early morning sex because she wakes up horny and energetic and likes to cuddle and fall asleep and take an additional snooze for an hour or so after. The energy level does matter. As for the strategically placed vibe, you must be watching us. We have gone through our share of the Magic Wands, from the corded, to the cordless, to the current favorite the cordless mini Magic Wand. Yes, after kissing and oral play, about 5 min with the wand to her first orgasm. Once she starts, she wants half a dozen at least. 4 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
Numex 2,415 Posted August 14, 2022 On 8/13/2022 at 9:22 AM, couplers said: How much time do you spend per week on average having sex? I'm not going to calculate it out now, but whatever it is, I'd say Daniela spends about twice the time that I do having sex. With her being a lot younger than me I figured that the freedom to play outside our marriage would make her happy. Plus, her practice was to always have more than one guy going at a time. And I was right. Quote Share this post Link to post
EastInWest 1,524 Posted August 16, 2022 Probably, these days, we average about 4 hours. We average at least once a day but those sessions are often about thirty minutes in the morning or before bed until the weekend. We both work out more now than we used to - we're not old but we're getting older and need to put more time into taking care of ourselves - that takes up time in the schedule and distracts from what used to be a minimum of two longer, athletic sessions a day. Now we mostly save that stuff for our very relaxed days. If we're not working it could easily be 7-10. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post
NWAtlSwing 522 Posted August 16, 2022 Sex is a lot more than activities in search of an orgasm for us. Quote Share this post Link to post
couplers 4,638 Posted August 17, 2022 15 hours ago, NWAtlSwing said: Sex is a lot more than activities in search of an orgasm for us. Please elaborate. Quote Share this post Link to post
NWAtlSwing 522 Posted August 17, 2022 5 hours ago, couplers said: Please elaborate. Well, both of us don't always cum when we fool around. Sometimes, she will help me play with myself with anything from oral to just stroking an arm lovingly. Sometimes, there is a lot of groping through the day, that just makes us feel good. Is that sex? It is foreplay for sure. We consider all foreplay sex. So that might be seconds of a dick rubbing on a butt at the sink. It might be a quick flash of tits, or pants pulled down to show an ass. It might be her saying "I see you waggling him over there" or some happy time with her holding my balls. In terms of "sex" where we are doing the whole penis in vagina thing, we do that a couple times a week or so. Never really timed it from hitting the bed until we are done so not sure how many hours that takes up. We enjoy it and it is fun, and it is somewhere on the spectrum of intimacy that we engage in. This is all separate from play with others. That tends to be more time spent engaged as it were, because there is a set time. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post