Over-thinking?!!!

[Renee22 1]

Married for over 20 years, New to LS about 7mths. 

[Renee22 1]

Sorry I cannot delete the dup topic. New to a forum. Question- How do you work with your SO that is having such a good time it seems that you are being left out or forgotten about? It is really hard to find a couple that all 4 click seems that there a lot of hot females out there. Not that any connection is a bad connection just not the sexual excitement that was wanting. 

[Billygoat 443]

Welcome.  

[Billygoat 443]

Welcome.  This is where meet n greets, clubs and house parties.  Go to mingle and meet people.  And always remember…..it is ok to play with the one you arrived with.  In a room….or in an open room.  Participate in themes etc.  everyone starts somewhere….enjoy and mingle in the social environment of the Lifestyle….experiences will unfold naturally in time.

[GoldCoCouple 4,065]

[enhancer 1,585]

Welcome to the forum!  Can you explain what you mean by working with your SO about feeling left out or forgotten about?

[Numex 2,413]

On 1/16/2023 at 6:28 PM, Renee22 said:

How do you work with your SO that is having such a good time it seems that you are being left out or forgotten about? It is really hard to find a couple that all 4 click

Same thing for my wife and me.  For the time being, just be happy for your wife having a good time.  You are giving her a wonderful gift.  For you, enjoy watching, participating, the sloppy seconds.  Things will not necessarily move in synch.  If you go into each session without expectations and a chill attitude things will start to come your way.  That's what we did and now all is good.

[GoldCoCouple 4,065]

Finding a 4 way match is hard and will probably take some time. Just understand this and know if you do nothing, you won't find anyone. IOHO, it was worth the work and time it took to find other matching couples. Just be patient and don't try to force something that isn't there. If there is a match for one of you and not the other, just move on to the next couple and keep going until there is.

 

One other thing: when we start communicating with a potential couple, we recommend meeting them sooner than later. You will learn more about them in 5 minutes in person than you will ever learn via text, email, etc. Meet them for drinks or dinner with both couples knowing that there is no playing planned or expected. This will eliminate any pressure that either side may feel. Meet, talk, and then decide is there is any spark. Sometimes the book really is more enjoyable than just the cover...and sometimes the cover is all there is with no story. We prefer books with great stories.