2022 State of Play Swinger Stats

[NerdsAreFun 226]

Some stats on the swinging world.  Interesting that a slim majority (50.2%) of men now identify as bi.  65.8% in the 18-39 age group.  I think the days of that being a closeted thing in the swinger world are coming to an end.  Also surprised me that 80.5% were soft swap only.

https://swingershelp.com/swinger-survey-results-2022/

 

 

And they also provide a list of most popular swinging sites in various cities.

https://swingershelp.com/popular-swinging-dating-sites/

[bbarnsworth 2,637]

Thanks for sharing this! Interesting!

[Numex 2,412]

It is interesting that swingers still tend to be older and married.  I would have thought that with young people being more sexually uninhibited that swinging would have become more a younger persons game and it would start pre-marriage leading to marriage rather than beginning after marriage.

[couplers 4,636]

11 hours ago, Numex said:

It is interesting that swingers still tend to be older and married.  I would have thought.. that swinging would have become more a younger persons game and it would start pre-marriage leading to marriage rather than beginning after marriage.

I suppose that we are the exception to the rule you are discussing.  Although not traditional swingers, we are a monogamish poly family that formed in our early- to mid- twenties and is firmly established in that we have a house and kids.

 

But it does seem true that although young people have many and varied relationships, the goal seems to be to settle into a single relationship with swinging coming later, if it does come.

[GoldCoCouple 4,065]

My guess is that more younger people are involved. It has always appeared to us that there is two groups: 20-29 and over 40 with the 30-39 group being involved with raising families. One possible reason that the 20-29 group is so low in this pole is because they might not call it swinging, but just playing or experimenting or some other word. "Swinging" all too often can bring up ideas of the 1970's: shag carpeting, sunken living rooms, fondue parties, and the like. If you don't actually GO to a 'swingers club', does it still count as swinging if a young couple has a threesome or swaps with another young couple? I think it might just have to do with where the survey got their data from and what the definition of 'swing' is/was...

[couplers 4,636]

19 hours ago, GoldCoCouple said:

One possible reason that the 20-29 group is so low in this pole [sic, poll] is because they might not call it swinging, but just playing or experimenting or some other word.

Excellent point.  I have spoken with some young women (high school, college) who don't have a traditional boyfriend but rather date in groups of men and women.  No one has a fixed partner, but go out casually in pairs or as a group and have sex the same way.  It's just considered "dating."

[NerdsAreFun 226]

On 3/5/2023 at 8:03 PM, Numex said:

It is interesting that swingers still tend to be older and married.  I would have thought that with young people being more sexually uninhibited that swinging would have become more a younger persons game and it would start pre-marriage leading to marriage rather than beginning after marriage.

Suppose it depends on what you call it as well.  Like on the Feeld app, there are many younger folks talking about their ENM/poly relationships and few references to swinging.

[Numex 2,412]

10 hours ago, NerdsAreFun said:

Suppose it depends on what you call it as well.  Like on the Feeld app, there are many younger folks talking about their ENM/poly relationships and few references to swinging.

I haven't explored any dating/hookup apps, but have read a fair amount about how they are pretty toxic.  The info given in those apps isn't good for finding a long-term partner.  Plus women have unrealistic physical and financial standards that end up with 10% of the men getting 90% of the women.  The other 90% of the guys don't have a chance, while those 90% of the women are used then dumped and disillusioned. 

[NerdsAreFun 226]

1 hour ago, Numex said:

I haven't explored any dating/hookup apps, but have read a fair amount about how they are pretty toxic.  The info given in those apps isn't good for finding a long-term partner.  Plus women have unrealistic physical and financial standards that end up with 10% of the men getting 90% of the women.  The other 90% of the guys don't have a chance, while those 90% of the women are used then dumped and disillusioned. 

Feeld caters pretty specifically to the non-monogamous folks.  The majority of people we see there are ethically non-monogamous in a couple.  Where each member of the couple has their own profile but they are linked together.  Also generally very nice and genuine.  Having a much better experience than SLS/AFF/SDC.  Much lower pressure, just friendly interactions.  Profile pictures are PG and no one has hounded us for anything more.  None of the immediate dick pic nonsense.  More how's your day going, what's your favorite drink, what would you want to do on a date sort of more normal small talk.  We're liking that environment.

 

But yeah I've heard that talking point before from some talking heads of a certain political persuasion.

Edited March 8, 2023 by NerdsAreFun

[NerdsAreFun 226]

What's actually going on there is women are just demanding less sexism than they put up with in the past.  Not the physical/financial status.

"

But there’s a deeper problem with dating culture at play. Men are feeling lonely, because expectations for men have been famously low and they tend to half-arse both dating and their own personal development, and women are, put simply, giving up on them, weeding out the week and raising their dating standards. 

 

Psychology Today puts it this way: “[Women] prefer men who are emotionally available, good communicators, and share similar values.” And because men are… not always the best at all of those things, women are ditching them.  "

https://www.glamourmagazine.co.uk/article/women-dating-standards-higher-than-ever

Edited March 8, 2023 by NerdsAreFun

[cplnuswing 4,713]

On 3/7/2023 at 7:37 AM, couplers said:

Excellent point.  I have spoken with some young women (high school, college) who don't have a traditional boyfriend but rather date in groups of men and women.  No one has a fixed partner, but go out casually in pairs or as a group and have sex the same way.  It's just considered "dating."

 

I agree, GoldCoCouple made an excellent point, different age groups use different labels for what at its heart, is basically the same thing.  Maybe good example would be how often do you see the term "wife swapping" now vs 20 years ago?

[couplers 4,636]

10 hours ago, cplnuswing said:

how often do you see the term "wife swapping" now

Good point.  Being nonmonogamous now starts before marriage, or even necessarily being paired.

[NerdsAreFun 226]

Yeah see people declaring that they are ENM as part of their dating profile right from the get go with younger folks.  As opposed to the more stereotypical husband of years trying to talk his wife into swinging of the past.

[Numex 2,412]

On 3/7/2023 at 8:04 PM, NerdsAreFun said:

I've heard that talking point before from some talking heads of a certain political persuasion.

I've heard that point made on both sides of the political spectrum.  I'm not disclosing my political persuasion, but I read all the way across the spectrum from far left to far right.  It is sometimes entertaining, but also good to know what people are thinking, even if you don't agree with them.  There is more common opinion on dating app than I expected, although it is much more varied and subtle than what I wrote above.  People across the spectrum like to criticize social media generally as well, albeit for different reasons.