Looking for Chemistry

[ExploringOptions 185]

After reading so many posts about others meeting new partners all the time we feel we are missing out on fun. 
We think we know who we would like to meet setting the criteria in the search. Age close to ours, physically attractive, location close to us but not too close. Male has to be straight, female straight or bi-ish? Sounds like we are looking for us or the friends we already found. 
Are we setting our goal that can’t be found? 

[lcmim 1,081]

It is Not bad to have likes and dislikes.

Insisting on the whole list might be counterproductive. 

It might amaze you the depth of field once you expand "age close to ours" a few years, or "physically attractive" a bit wider in scope. How about being willing to drive a few more miles?

The world is full of lively, interesting and playful people  if you do not eliminate most by to heavy  a screening process.

[AdamGunn2 393]

You can always find what you're looking for - it just may take a very long time depending on how strict you interpret what you want.  

 

After you get into it, you may find that some of the things you thought were must haves aren't.

[ExploringOptions 185]

1 hour ago, lcmim said:

It is Not bad to have likes and dislikes.

Insisting on the whole list might be counterproductive. 

It might amaze you the depth of field once you expand "age close to ours" a few years, or "physically attractive" a bit wider in scope. How about being willing to drive a few more miles?

The world is full of lively, interesting and playful people  if you do not eliminate most by to heavy  a screening process.

Age close to ours is not a set age, we have friends both older and younger, it’s more closer in age behavior. We need an attraction thinking we also need to be attractive to others. We as a couple know what we like physically, setting up higher standards for a sexual partner. Most likely we are passing over some terrific people in what others would consider superficial reasons. I look at it from the other searchers view, I want them to find us attractive not just sexual beings. 
Driving distances is not a true hard bump. 100 miles or 2 hours is not a stopping point. 
We don’t need to rush finding others, we find the search sexy and exciting and frustrating. 

[GoldCoCouple 4,065]

No, you're not setting your sights too high...but just remember that photos don't always capture how attractive someone is. We found that personality trumps physical beauty every time.

[ExploringOptions 185]

We found out photos are not truthful and profiles might be fiction. 
We aren’t models so we wonder what others say about us, I hope they find us attractive and aren’t just looking for quick sex. Personality counts plenty and agree we may be passing by some great new friends. Any meeting has to have equal reciprocal attraction. 

[GoldCoCouple 4,065]

We try to only use photos to make it easier for us to meet the first time. Within the first 5 minutes of meeting IRL, we can almost always tell if there is any connection. Even when there isn't a connection, it's usually a good time meeting other people with like minds. Bottom line is we always try to meet rather quickly after finding another couple that we may be interested in. It saves a great deal of time instead of endless back and forth emails and texting...

[William2001 53]

I find your post interesting, for several reasons. I can understand wanting to meet other people who you have a connection with, like and have something in common...

 

But may Make a few observations. First, opposites attract, therefore I would imagine that other people who were unlike yourselves would be more interesting to meet and see how you connect...

 

Secondly, meeting people so similar to yourselves might be a bit 'vanilla' compared to meeting people where the unexpected personalities make for a better connection.

 

I have found out over many years of experience that the random unexpected people are the most interesting and fun.

 

Of course this is only my own opinion and I have no wish to criticise or upset you.

 

(PS. As you can see I have discovered the text and colour buttons... 🙂 )