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True... But let's all keep in mind that ANY TIME you have sex with a stranger you are at risk for disease. You have to be wise enough and discerning enough to make a "judgment" about the person - not the statistics that might somehow relate to them. But isn't that ultimately the point? Make your judgments based on the person? I think when we forget that point, we are being racist, elitist, narrow-minded... Whatever fits... We have come up with a new term around here (mostly to describe Mrs Spoo's "slight bisexual interest) and I think it fits pretty well: "Person-sexual". Just judge each person as an individual. If they fit your preferences - great! If they over come your preferences - even better!!!

Of the four passages that were quoted to "prove" Greg's racism, it seems to me that the only one that's even potentially problematic would be: "With white men, the problem usually falls into one of two categories. Either they cum too early (after only four or five strokes during intercourse) or they can't get an erection at all (and then make some lame statement like, "This has never happened to me before!"). This has happened at least 60% of the time during swinging encounters with white men. Black men, on the other hand, rarely seem to have these problems." But, if this passage were prefaced with the phrase, "In our experience," the problem would disappear. Even though these sentences might sound like a swipe at all white men, my guess is that it was just intended as a factual statement of what's happened with the white men Sheryl's been with. And you really can't take exception to that: the facts of their experience are the facts. Likewise, people's turn-ons are what they are, and they don't necessarily imply racism. For instance, I can say that I would under no circumstances want to have sex with a man of any color. Does that make me sexist? Though it's never happened to me, I don't think I'd be bothered if a woman were to say to me, "Sorry, I don't swing with white men." (I might be disappointed, but that's another story.) I might even consider it to be tactful. We've sent face pics to a couple of couples who've declined to meet us because "Mary just doesn't go for men with beards." Now the truth may well have been that Mary just didn't go for me, but putting it the way they did made it feel a lot less personal. Granted, if a woman were to snarl at me "I don't even touch vile honky bastards like you," I think I'd be perturbed, but if she politely told me that she prefers black men, I can't imagine that that would be a problem. And, judging from the tone of Greg and Sheryl's posts, it doesn't seem likely that they'd ever be anything but polite.

The wife and I had a talk about this and I decided that I would not have sex with white men either. Or any other man Just too taboo for me right now.

Quote AVE, I don't feel your getting what you said here, I don't think you really thought about the consequences, If your over 18 in your area, Throwing the first punch would have, in a different situation had a different outcome. 1.That is assault and battery, weather the police were involved or not you still committed assault and battery. 2.You were, according to your chain of events, house sitting for someone at their own home. 3.Sometimes even a soft punch, could be lethal. You said yourself you didn't know this guy, (you don't know his medical history) 4.What if at any time because you did in fact, commit a crime, that you felt in control of, involved the police? Your at someone else's house having to explain that you did this because he wouldn't fuck your girlfriend. What about every one in your whole town knowing you have been arrested for battery (and possibly sexual deviance)? The middle school you work at,or any Future Employer.Violent acts never leave your record...ever. Those are thoughts about considering the consequences. I don't need a reply to any of the above at all, EVER. It is something I would hope you think about every day, for the rest of your life. Enough about the punch.Lets move on to how you feel about this lifestyle.This all started with a fantasy for you.We all have them. Many people start for different reasons.But here is a major difference between what you have going so far at your age, and what we have being older.(not saying your to young,just our differences) We seek like minded people,(couples) in solid good relationships that we share our sexuality with. We have an understanding that in those relationships we make sure that everyone is emotionally prepared for any misunderstandings.We practice good communication first, with the couples or singles we should encounter.That let us fully understand each other. Your not doing that Thus Far. What I see here,from you. From your own words.(ill copy and past here if need be, from other posts) Is you CONTROLLING every situation. The last one being, you said 4 some when you first met. He and his girl went along. You and maybe both girls were on board with this experiment, but this guy didn't have a clue before he came home from school.This is being PREDATORY. All throughout you posts everything says your following a predatory sexual behavior. Not once,not one person or couple have you considered anyone's feelings but your own.Before acting on your own desires. I'm really not trying to bash you.. You have said all along you wanted our thoughts, our replies, our opinions as long as we don't tell you that you are too young bla, bla , bla. In this lifestyle we share our sexuality with others that are all open and understanding of how we feel.Your being deceiving to others, your girlfriend, and to yourself. You said that you are going to continue with swinging, I'm not telling you to grow up. I'm saying STOP.Think about this. Think about what WE AS SWINGERS think.Then you may take a better road than the one you are on:cool:.

Hey, it's deja vu all over again! I believe this happened the last time too... Jeez, people, get a grip. All she said was that she wasn't going to have sex with white men any more. You see, it smarts a bit when people say they're not interested in you--no matter what the reason may be. But, really, what you have to learn is that 1) you aren't going to change anyone else's mind, no matter how much you curse at them or type in caps 2) not everyone thinks you're hot, whether you're a white guy, a black woman, a little blond chick, an Asian male, etc. 3) people will have preferences and prejudices. We all come with baggage. Getting your knickers in a twist only raises your blood pressure and does nothing else constructive. Do I pop a blood vessel when people say they're not attracted to black women? Hell, no! As it stands now, it's just weeding people off of my dance card. So many men and women, so little time.... Pepper

Greg & Sheryl's comments were racist. They used race as a determining factor and implied that white men were somehow inferior to black men sexually. Not sure why anyone would get worked up about it though. My penis is a racist too, I find most black women unattractive. My wife is even a bigger sexual racist where she ONLY wants to play with white men. Its just our sexual preferences and play no part in our day to day lives. Her best friend in college was Asian, even though she's not attracted to Asians sexually. To me it doesn't feel any different than discriminating on body type or height or whatever when it comes to sex.

This is not just an issue for us. It is an issue for anyone on Swingers Board who has any opinion about the role race plays in the swinging lifestyle. If you feel it shouldn't be an issue, why are you not attacking the original poster of this thread? That statement speaks purely to Sheryl's experience and does not bring down an entire race. If our intention was to put down all white men, we would have said "White men can never get it up." In defending Sheryl, Pepper & Drew put it best when they said, "Just because that's her reason doesn't mean it's true overall...it's just true in HER world. I think that's not the case in most people's worlds, so I don't think there's a need to censor the statements." Because we try to speak to our experience in the lifestyle, we try to use the first-person "we" whenever possible, but when we speak to our individual experiences, we use the third person (Greg or Sheryl) when referring to one another. How do you know it's not Sheryl composing this post? It is a fact. You'll see underneath our icon that we joined the Swingers Board in November 2001, and Sheryl started swinging with her previous husband (who was white, by the way) back in the early 90's. If the white men in Sheryl's past had that much of a problem with the way she looked, then they had no business trying to play with her in the first place. We don't mind debating this issue with you, but it would be nice if you could leave the personal insults out of it.

The "internet brings out the asshole in many" point reminded me of something funny. There has been one (thankfully only one) SM we've had a problem with. This was on SLS, which recently added some sort of chat feature we never use. One day, browsing the profiles, a window pops up and says "'suchandsuchSM' wants to chat, will you accept?" I clicked "yes" and the following ensued. SM: hey how r u i have big dik Me: Uh huh. SM: i hav big dik pleez ur women good Me: All of them? That's funny, I didn't know I had more than one womAn. Well, I did come home drunk that one night and saw two in my bed side by side, but they both looked suspiciously like my wife. SM: wut wrong wit u? Me: I seem to be having a problem satisfying all of my many women, apparently, and desperately need YOUR help...does that about sum it up? SM: y u hab many woman and cant pleez? Me: Well, according to my recently hired internet psychologist/problem solver...actually I'm not quite sure. What is your expert opinion on this conundrum, doctor? SM: u r a dik bye (end transmission) Needless to say, I immediately vowed to always accept chat invitations in the future--I mean this is the sort of entertainment you just don't get anywhere else, you know?

Yep. La-La land. Now that we know that you're "part of that race", which, according to Sheryl, "has consistently underperformed in bed" I'm curious as to which you are - one of the ones who "cums after only 4 or 5 strokes", or one who "can't have an erection at all?" Just asking, that's all

That was my point Greg that they're issues for YOU not for US. WE all manage to get along without insulting other races or bringing down an entire race just because they "fail to satisfy" your wife. Yes, when you continually repeat it as you have here, I do think your using her. When a politician quotes a founding father, he does it to justify HIS patriotism, not the founding fathers. When your Pastor quotes the Bible, he does it to justify HIS religious beliefs, not Jesus's. When a skinhead quotes Hitler, he does it to justify HIS racism, not Hitlers. And when YOU continually quote your wife??? By the way, why is it always YOU telling us what SHE thinks? Why don't you tell us what YOU think, and let her do the same? She can type, right? Yeah, and by bein' a DICK you limit them even more. Oops, did I say that? I meant "somebody I know" said it. I was just repeating what THEY said. I don't believe it, of course. I don't need to talk to Vegaslee, he's a guy with a website who runs promotions for a club out in la-la land. Basically nothin' to me or me to him. You talk about her "years of experience" like it's a fact. Well, we have "years of experience" too, and we've never had a problem with white men. Maybe if your wife tried losing a few pounds or fixing her hair, the guys would have tried harder to please her. (Just for the record, I don't feel that way, my wife told me to say that. Also, I DO NOT THINK YOU'RE A DICK. They, "these people I know", do)