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Well, guys often get turned on by two girls touching each other, and I know quite a few women who wish they could see two guys touching each other. I once had the pleasure to see two guys getting each other off while I was with them and it's one of the best things I ever got to see I really wish that guys could get over their fear of becoming gay or disgust even thinking about having to see this in a club, so the bi-courius of comfortable men would not have to hold it back when the mood strikes

Susan here--If you're up for it, I'd try to help this other guy become a better lover. And there's always first time jitters and he seems to have had them. Best thing to do is to say,"Next time, I'd like to try things this way and I bet things will go great." I did this once and the guy really listened, was not offended and we saw them for nearly a year until they moved. His wife thanked me saying,"I don't know what having sex with you has done, but I'm having a better time because of it." What a wonderful endorsement.

Isn't that what it is all about? Having fun and going with what feels right at the time? Don't know if I would ever do it, but I say that as long as all involved are okay with it...what's the harm.

As the husband of a gorgeous size 4 hottie I can say with great confidence that if someone dumped us because she was too good looking we would both be very hurt and we would think you were a pair of insecure, superficial imbiciles. We can accept if someone rejects us because they are not attracted to us or we do not meet their preferences or have done something that pisses them off but to be blown off because one of us is too good looking is not only silly it is insulting. By allowing your insecurities to get the best of you if you reject these people you are not only accusing them of being superficial and petty and judgemental but you are being the same thing that you are assuming they are. If you reject them due to appearances then you are the one being shallow and vain, not them. Pretty much every female we have ever played with has been less attractive than my wife and she has never once been "grossed out" or felt the least bit sorry for me. That is a completely ridiculous thing to say. Just because someone is attractive does not mean that they are shallow or vain or mean spirited towards those of different body types. Attractive people are capable of carrying on an inteligent conversation and are capable of being kind and compassionate and enjoy the company of others for a wide variety of reasons and interests. Not every beautiful women is a souless, egotistical bimbo like Paris Hilton or Britney Spears.

We were into our usual sex play with a couple we play with regularly, I am going down on the wife when I see her husband reach over to my husband and start rubbing his balls, then stroking his cock. My husband laid back and let it happen. They then laid foot to head 69'ish and begging jerking each other off. The ladies stopped what they were doing and watched them get each other off as we rubbed ourselves off. Whewwwwwwwww, I hope it happens again!

Well - there you go... After all this time, I finally learn that I am not a true swinger... Shoot... ... Dang... Spoomonkey

I do not participate in Gang Bangs, nor is it a fantasy of my Mr.'s but I can empathize with your wife. I think a Gang Bang is a different kind of swinging. To me it is more of a fetish, and although your wife may appear to be disrespected during the bang, she is probably getting a lot more out of it then she will ever tell you. Although these men are ravaging her, she is the ultimate center of attention. And she has the ability to be very, very naughty in the process. She is getting a different kind of respect from these me. It is not societal respect, it is respect from the standpoint that everyman wants her, and everyman there wants to play with her, and every man can play with her. I think she is actually in the position of power more than anyone else there. I would imagine that can be intoxicating. Now that you know why she wants to do it..... you need to figure out why you don't want her to do it. I read your post a few times, and the only thing I can figure out is that you are uncomfortable with it because it is not your fantasy anymore, and your wife hasn't met your comfort level by helping establish rules for the bang. I still think that there is more to it than that. What exactly makes you uncomfortable? What exact activities during the bang would you like for her to avoid? Are you having any jealousy issues with the other men because she is becoming more open to other acts? (Like Blow jobs and Anal Sex) Do you have a hard time respecting her because she is acting, in your opinion, slutty? Are you feeling left out? Now in our relationship, if Mr Indy asked me not to do something I would stop immediately and be with him. We have a good set of rules for almost any circumstance, and we are both very comfortable with them. To a certain degree I can understand where your wife is coming from. It sounds like from what you have written so far, that you guys had some rather liberal rules to begin with, and since you have been in the lifestyle for more than a decade, I think that is reasonable. But now, it seems to me you want to make changes to the rules, that maybe didn't exist before, or without reason. I am not advocating that there has to be a reason for every rule change, but I do think that since this is such an important issue to you, and clearly an ongoing issue between you two, you need to have reasons. If I were your wife and truly enjoyed something, and you allowed me to do it for a period of time, and then all of a sudden didn't want me to do it, or wanted me to restrict it, I would be confused and frustrated, and would probably behave much like your wife is doing. To me it is unreasonable for you to impose rules this far into the game without valid reasons. So again, my advice to you, is for you to determine what it is exactly that you do not like about her GB and to articulate that in a compassionate way to your wife. You then must sit without judgement and listen to her explain what exactly she likes from the GB. Hopefully when the 2 of you compare notes, you will be able to reach a compromise that serves both of your needs. At this point you are in a stalemate, and neither one of you are going to get any farther along without good, honest communication without judgement or hesitation.