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Everyone here does know that cold sores or fever blisters in the mouth area means you have herpes HSV1? Do you disclose to all your potential partners that you have herpes before you kiss them or go down on them? You could be shedding the virus even if you do not have a sore.

If you find out you have HSV1, then you mayknow the answer to that one. If your playmate was one of the 75% plus of the people on this board that have HSV1, but was in the minority that showed symptons and shedding, then she could have transferred it to you through oral sex. (Heck, even if it turns out to be HSV2 it could still have been transmitted to you through a BJ, its just a little less likely.) What's my point? Well, anything other than sex with you spouse has risks. Even fully rubbered, dams and all, there are still risks. You can minimize them but not avoid them. Second, even though I definitely feel for both the OP and toomuchfun and would not want to trade places with any of them, they are not in such a different space than most of you reading this post. Most of you already have herpes in one form or another but are blissfully asymptomatic.

I hear what your saying and I agree with you, unfortunately we live in a world where most people lie about things that are small so you know they will do it something such as an std. The only thing you can do is protect yourself to the fullest every way possible while still enjoying yourself by learning how the body works and finding ways to keep it as healthy as possible and doing this means listening to all sides that have ways of doing this and if others have something to say about you taking precautions, that's their issue. Here's something you should read: New Study in Suburban Population Shows Herpes is Very Common | Infection Control Today "ABOUT THE STUDY The study took place at six randomly selected PCP offices in relatively affluent areas in each of six U.S. cities (Atlanta, Baltimore, Boston, Chicago, Dallas, Denver). At each office, approximately 150 people age 18-59 volunteered to participate. All blood samples were sent to a central laboratory to determine if the sample was seropositive for HSV-2, in other words, had the virus that causes genital herpes (GH). All samples were analyzed using the Focus Technologies HerpeSelect® 2 ELISA IgG test designed specifically to detect HSV-2 antibodies in the blood. In total, 5,732 people were screened; 5,452 provided an analyzable blood sample and 5,433 completed a questionnaire. The final sample was 75 percent white, 14 percent African American, and 4 percent Hispanic. Eighty percent were employed full- or part-time, 74 percent had some college or higher education, 45 percent had a household income of $60,000 or higher, and 68 percent were married/living with their partner. The overall weighted HSV-2 seroprevalence was 25.5 percent - that means 1 in 4 people tested positive for the virus that causes genital herpes. The seroprevalence increased from 13.4 percent in the 18-29-year age group, to 25.2 percent (30-39 years), to 31.2 percent (40-49 years) and 28.0 percent (50-59 years). Seroprevalence among women (28.3 percent) was greater than that among men (22.0 percent), and was consistently higher across all age groups. Of the 1,387 people that tested positive for genital herpes, only 12 percent knew they were infected. The study showed that higher levels of education, income, and marital status did not reduce the chances of having genital herpes: those with some college had a prevalence of 27 percent, college graduates had a prevalence of 22 percent, married individuals had a prevalence of 24 percent, those living with their partners had a prevalence of 29 percent, and those with household incomes of $60,000-$80,000 had a prevalence of 25 percent while those with incomes over $100,000 had a prevalence of 22 percent. The study was sponsored by GlaxoSmithKline, one of the world's leading research-based pharmaceutical and health care companies. " I found an article that went in depth but I can't find it. It showed how a good amount of the people were asked if they had an std would they tell their partner and they said NO. When you take into account 30% of babies are born where the father isn't their biological father, I wouldn't expect someone to tell you they have an std., you just have to assume someone has one until they prove otherwise.

Swinging isn't like dating in high school where, if you don't get laid you go have to go home and masturbate. We're married. We've got a spouse to finish off with if nobody else helps us do it. I agree with the some of the others. Intercourse is the finale'. And it's good, but, it's the foreplay that's best!

I know it's attempted murder in some states to have aids/hiv and spread it/not tell a partner. And doing that and doing what you are doing, is absolutely disgusting to me! Sorry, but I think you should have to wear a sandwich sign to any public on or off premise club, night club, bar, and so on! How can you do that to people????? I pride myself on never having had a std, I do not have any form of unprotected sex with anyone who doesn't have regular testing between partners and right before we meet! Show me the papers, I show mine! THIS IS FRACKING NASTY AND YOU WILL GET YOURS SOMEDAY FOR GIVING A FRACKING DISEASE TO PEOPLE WHO ARE STRAIGHT-FORWARD AND HONEST WITH YOU! LEARN ABOUT YOUR DISEASE!!!! YOU CAN SPREAD IT WITHOUT HAVING ANY SORT OF SYMPTOM! people like you make me sick!!! I know I'll get a bad rating for this, but this is fucking pitiful and people like this poster should be fucking shot, nasty sob!!! I would physically hurt/possibly murder/without a doubt would shoot them in the genitals, anyone who did something so absolutely disgusting as to lie and infect me!!! I have a temper... and a snub-nosed S&W 38, did I mention that I'm an awesome shot?! I'm not normally violent, but frack with my health and you WILL END! fucking nasty asses! It's because of people like you, that people like 50'slady, end up with this shit!!!! 50'sLady, It was very brave for you to come out and be honest like that!!!! There are a lot of good people who end up with herpes( and then there are the piece of shit fuckers---like I just ranted about), you can still swing after all,, there are a lot of people with it--that are not nasty(like above). I hope you find it in you to get back into the lifestyle, you are honest and not alone! I'm sorry it happened to you!

I saw it in a scholarly book, written some years ago on the subject of racial differences. You can also check this: Human penis size - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

It amazes me how something so prevalent has such a stigma to it. We could have AIDs and come out more easily than we can with something as simple as HSV. All HSV really is is an annoyance, a skin irritation. We have Herpes and we swing and we don't tell our partners that we have it. We don't swing when there are any symptoms or signs of potential symptoms and we do use condoms for any vaginal penetration. The crazy part is that we both had it when we were single and didn't know it and therefore didn't take precautions, so what's the difference between that and now. At least now we know so we do/can take precautions. I discovered I had it shortly after I started dating my wife. But, I'd had it for probably 10 years by then. It started when I was in my late teens and I went to the dr the first few times and different drs all told me "it's just a skin/heat rash". So I put neosporin on it and went on my way. Then I started dating my wife and she told me that she had herpes. I told her about the skin rash I'd experienced multiple times now and we agreed I should ask a new dr and this time specifically ask for a Herpes test. Sure enough, that's what it was. We were lucky in that we both had it. Who knows how many people I spread it to unknowingly due to a bad diagnosis. When I just thought it was a rash, as long as sex didn't hurt I saw no reason not to have it. But, now I know what it is and the second I feel I MIGHT have an irritation all sex is off. We feel that with more than 25% of the population having the virus, that couples are taking less of a risk by playing with us than they are with the many infected people who don't even know they have it. Somehow I'm betting we aren't alone.