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I think it's easy to "monday morning quarterback" this event and say that Pet missed an opportunity to establish his rank in the alpha male hierarchy - and for some folks, that's VERY important. I also respect a man that carefully chooses his battles. This was the swinger's equivilent of a Kobiashi Marou - a no win scenario. I think Julie's response was appropriate.

It seems to me that you are giving her permission to have sex with another, but she is shying away from the subject while at the same time planning to or actually having sex with another man/men. For me it would only work if we were able to both discuss the subject openly and it doesn't appear you have been able to do that so far. Even if you say you don't care what she does you should still discuss it make sure you are both on the same page as far as what you are both getting/want from this whole experience. It is my opinion that if you don't have some serious discussion before she proceeds you are asking for trouble. Good Luck to you both. Bryan & Sharon

The phrase "friends with benefits" is so overused by people who don't know the difference between friends and acquaintances that it has become completely worthless as a descriptor in my opinion.

It's not full-swap. It's an ice-breaker.

Let me get my flame suit on . . . ok I'm ready. Soft swap is everything but intercourse. Full swap includes intercourse with or without ejaculation. Full swap starts soft but it's known from the start the "intent" is to have intercourse with the other partner. Things can happen to delay or stop the progression to intercourse, isn’t that why all parties have veto power? Full swap for us implies the other couple have worked thru the insecurity issues and shares our “intent” to share fully with each other.